- Now, if you're like most women,
you probably attract the guys that you don't really want.
The creepy Camerons, the needy Nicks,
What is a guy's first name who start with an L?
You get the point.
You probably have no problem attracting
certain types of guys,
but you're here right now because the guys that you do want
are probably not necessarily pursuing you.
Don't worry, you sexy single lady,
I'm here to help you attract the man
and the type of guy that you really want,
so if that sounds good to you,
comment below saying I'm ready to find love
while the intro plays,
I'll see you in a second.
Hey there, my name is Adam LoDolce
from SexyConfidence.com where I help the 21st century woman
create a love life that she absolutely fricking loves
and this video is all about attracting
the man you really want.
Now, the internet is full of a ton of (beep)
especially when it comes to teaching you, ladies,
how to attract men.
Now, over the past year, I've heard a researcher
here at Sexy Confidence and I really want to combine
my experience as a dating coach
and real data, real research, real scientific insight
and also just a basic common sense
and combine all that stuff to give you,
sexy single ladies, the best advice possible.
So this video is a combination of all that
to help you attract the man you really want.
Here are the best to attract men.
Number one is through kindness.
Now, one major study asked 10,000 men and women
what quality they find most important in a mate.
And the number one response all way across the board
Now, this doesn't mean you have to be the type of person
that a man can walk all over, just do anything he wants.
No, what this means is that you care about the other person
and you want to make them happy
so long as the happiness doesn't come
at the expense of yourself.
And so long as that person is reciprocating.
So be kind, so long as he's kind, as well.
Number two is youthfulness.
Now, for you ladies who are watching this video
who are maybe a little bit older,
notice that I didn't say youth.
I said youthfulness.
The definition of youthfulness
is behavior or appearance characteristic of young people.
Note that word behavior.
Again, for you ladies who might not be on the younger side,
don't click away from this video
because most women assume that men are only interested
in young women.
But in my experience of coaching a lot of women of all ages,
I found that it has actually less to do
with the specific age,
it has a lot to do with the attitude of that person.
Someone who is 60-year-old can be incredibly youthful,
they love to be social, spontaneous, excited about life
and just have a lot of energy to bring to a conversation.
Whereas some women who are 22-year-old can be so old,
lame, boring and way too serious.
So when you're going out there and meeting people
and having conversation,
remember to bring that youthfulness to the conversation,
bring that new energy as much as possible.
And you ladies, one of the biggest complaints I get
from women who are a little bit older
is that they only meet guys who are so fricking old,
like they're gross, like an old, saggy balls attitude old.
You don't want that, okay?
So remember, before a firs^t date,
remember to bring that youthful attitude to the table.
Number three, women with high self worth,
AKA high value women.
Now, confidence doesn't mean going out to every guy,
needing every conversation, asking the guy out
and leading the direction of how everything goes.
No, it doesn't mean that necessarily.
And actually, that is bringing a lot of masculine energy
to the table.
I want you to be sexy confidence.
It's really feminine confidence.
And really what that ultimately comes down to is knowing
that you deserve relationship, being confident
in what you bring to the table
and knowing that you deserve something amazing.
So I want you to start setting standards to yourself,
you're part of this community.
You're an amazing sexy single lady and don't forget that.
And if you find that you're meeting guys
who aren't treating you that way,
set that standard and tell them, you know,
use that amazing four letter word which is
next and find that next guy.
Number four is curves.
This all comes down to the classic hourglass shape
that a lot of men evolutionarily are looking for.
Now, most of this video I talked about attraction
as it pertains to things that you can't necessarily
change about yourself but I would be doing you disservice
to not talk about the physical side, as well.
A women's figure, of course, is a component of attraction,
I'd be lying to you if I said it wasn't.
And the hourglass shape is something that men just
on a very instinctual level look for and respond to.
Researchers have actually documented really a magnetic
male attraction to a waist to hip ratio of about .7.
This is the classic hourglass.
And an iTracking study last year found
that men start to evaluate a woman's hourglassness
within the first 200 milliseconds of viewing them,
I like big buts and I cannot lie.
But, of course, not everyone has a perfect hourglass shape,
and that's okay, that doesn't mean you can't attract men.
But what it does mean is you wanna take a look
at the clothing that you wear and find clothing that really
does accentuate and bring out that type of a figure.
Number five is women who give indicators of interest.
Researchers who study speed dating events
where men and women basically make decisions
in a matter of seconds or even minutes found
that just simply showing a little bit of interest
in the conversation can build
a massive amount of attraction.
So when you're talking to a guy,
really listen to what he's saying
and if you're digging what he's saying,
even break the touch barrier slowly but surely,
find a reason to maybe laugh and touch his arm.
You're sending an enormous amount of signals to him
that hey, I'm interested and maybe a little bit more,
showing that indicator of interest to him
also will boost his confidence
and he's gonna bring his A game,
like he's gonna get excited.
If he feels that you're not digging him
or you're not interested, what is he gonna do?
He's gonna move on to someone else.
Number six is about positive attitude.
Now, for starters, this is not groundbreaking, right?
Clearly, negativity is not attractive.
Positivity is attractive.
But men really are attracted to like pleasant, positive,
just generally cheerful women, they're just interested
and studies have shown that.
And I will personally attest to this,
I have gone out on many dates in my life
and there are some women you can just tell
all they want to do is talk (beep) about other people
or be negative, or you can tell
that their lives are just not put together.
And I remember when I met Jess,
it was just like a breath of fresh air
because they way she...
She had like these amazing lenses
that she saw the world through
and she was just always so happy
and so positive about everything and I loved it,
it was very magnetic to me.
Number seven, honesty.
Now, it's not like you need another reason to be honest,
you should be honest regardless, not to just attract men.
But actually research does find
that honesty actually affects judgment
of physical attractiveness, as well.
Interestingly enough, this study showed
that participants deemed honest people
as being more fit, healthy and kind.
So who knew telling the truth really is sexy?
Eight is a smile.
One of the easiest ways to improve your appearance
is just smiling.
And a lot of what I talk about
in my trainings, in my advanced courses
is this concept that I call smalking,
which is smiling while talking
and some people struggle with this,
I used to struggle with this myself,
but it's something you can actually train yourself to do
when you're meeting people for the first time.
And just by being aware of this and holding the smile
when you're having conversation,
try it, try it tonight, the next time you talk to someone.
It is amazing how well they're going to perceive you
and how they're going to perceive you
is being a much more attractive and inviting person.
Number nine is playing with your hair.
Now back in the day when I used to coach men
on how to flirt and meet you, sexy single ladies,
I would always coach them to take a look
for a woman who's kind of...
When they're talking to you, playing with their hair,
or even kind of like combing it a little bit
because what they're basically doing
subconsciously or consciously,
and it is showing you that hey, I'm interested in you.
This is just a natural reflex
that women will do and men will sometimes do it,
but more so touching their faces
when they're attracted to the other person.
So go ahead, play with your hair
and you're gonna be sending very subtle cues
that hey, I'm down.
Number 10 is just your overall energy and vibe.
Have you ever met some people and you just thought
within like three seconds of meeting them,
like yikes, I'm not interested.
And then other people you meet
within a few minutes you think
damn, I like this person, this person's great.
Well, what that comes down to
is your body language, your vibe,
what energy you bring into the table.
And I found that this is a lot of what I would work on
with both men and women when they're going,
meeting new people, it's just working on their vibe.
So next time you go out,
I want you to keep an eye on for other people's vibe
and see what works and what doesn't work.
Just opening your eyes a little bit
will make more attractive to other people.
And finally number 11 is your brain.
Now, let me tell you something I learned a long time ago.
Smart, confident guys are attracted
to smart, confident women.
On the other hand, dumb, insecure guys
are intimated by smart women.
If you agree, I'd love to hear yes, I agree in the comments.
And sadly, most men that you meet
are gonna be dumb and insecure.
But I don't want you to change your ways too much
because what happens, a lot of women will keep meeting
a lot of dumb, insecure men and say,
"Well, I'm smart and maybe I should change my ways."
Don't do it, don't dumb yourself down.
Of course, be humble, don't brag
like don't belittle people if you meet someone
who might not be the smartest guy in the world,
but at the same time, like don't be afraid to show
your intellectual side, it's totally okay.
So there you have it,
those are the 11 ways to attract men.
If you agree with all this,
I'd love to hear from you in the comments,
and maybe if I missed something,
leave a comment below
and share with this amazing community.
And also, if you liked this video,
please give it a like on YouTube
and don't forget to subscribe on YouTube
for more videos just like this every single week.
Thank you so...
Oh, and finally actually, before I get there,
make sure you head on over sexyconfidence.com
for a ton of amazing resource
so you can click right there and you can head on over
and I will see you next week, bye-bye.