"Dear Diary, today is the last day of school.
The summer is starting.
But the most important news is that Manuela and I...
...have been invited to the swimming pool at Daniele's house!"
"I've waited for this moment for months.
Maybe this time he'll pay some attention to me...."
Elvira!
Elvira!
Could you wake your granddaughter up?
I'm running late.
Melissa, hurry up, you're going to be late for school.
Elvira?
What are you doing?
Can't you hear me?
Please, can you do it?
I'm late, I still have to finish getting ready.
Sorry.
All right, I'll do it myself.
What a mess!
-Sweetheart, the alarm!
-Go away!
Sorry, darling, but you're going to be late for school.
Get out!
We arrived at 4 pm.
SUMMER On the whole way there I just wanted to turn
back.
My heart was in my mouth.
-Wait, don't ring!
-Why not?
It's still early.
No, it's not, this is the time Titti told us to come.
Feel this.
-I don't feel anything.
-But how!
It feels like it's about to explode!
Let's get out of here.
Come on!
You've had a crush on him for a year and now finally--
I look terrible today.
No way!
You look gorgeous.
What if he finds out I can't swim?
-Stay away from the pool.
-And if he kisses me... -...and realizes it's my first time?
-Are you crazy?
With all the rehearsing we've done!
-Who's that?
-Which?
-The only fuckable one.
-You're here!
Don't let her run away!
Pin her down, Patrizio!
No!
Please let me go!
Put me down, don't be a bastard!
-Hello, Manuela.
-I'm Manuela.
I'm Melissa.
-Well then hello, Melissa.
-Daniele!
Come here!
Excuse me.
Well, I....
Fucking assholes, my shoes!
These shoes cost me two hundred euros.
-Who is that girl lying down?
-Lavinia, Arnaldo's girlfriend.
A bitch.
Don't even try throwing me in the water or I'll kick your ass.
Honey.
I'm going over there.
Be careful, they'll throw you in the water.
No!
She can't swim!
Help her!
Do something!
Were you scared?
Me?
No.
I thought you knew how to swim.
Yes, I can swim, but....
I got scared all of a sudden.
But you just told me you weren't scared.
After!
You got scared.
Come on!
I'll show you the nicest part of the garden.
So you don't know how to swim.
I can teach you one day.
You can come back, without all these people.
-Well?
-Well what?
Will you come?
-Yes.
-You like it here?
Yes.
And you like me?
-Enough.
-What does your father do?
Engineer.
-He builds streets?
-No.
Oil.
He's on a platform in the middle of the Indian Ocean.
He'll be back within a year.
And your mother?
She sells bridal gowns.
-Do you have any brothers?
-No.
Just a friend.
-You confide in her.
-Yes.
-Do you tell her everything?
-Yes.
And what will you tell her about me?
You want to kiss me?
You want to kiss me?
You want to kiss me?
Yes.
Then kiss my dick.
Put it in your mouth.
What are you doing?
Maybe next time you'll kiss me on the mouth.
I haven't seen him since that day.
I've spent a gloomy summer full of choking tears...
...waiting for a phone call that never came.
I wanted to vanish, to fly away very, very far...
...like my father, to
the other side of the world.
AUTUMN Don't make that face.
Relax!
I'd like to see you in my place!
After what happened he disappeared!
Forget about him, he doesn't care about you.
I never said he cared about me, but I care about him.
And it gets worse every day.
Let's go.
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
-Good morning.
Come in, young ladies.
We were very glad to wait for you, right?
Roll!
-Abemo, Elisabetta.
-Here.
-Bozzini, Manuela.
-Here.
Caldiron, Clelia and Leo.
-Here.
-Here.
De Angelis, Marco.
First day of school.
I'm so nervous.
A new student.
Good start!
I must see him.
But he isn't here.
Holidays are over for everybody, except for him.
I am Marco De Angelis.
You know I should kick you out?
No, too easy.
Come on in.
Find a place.
I try to hate him for what he did to me... ...but I can't.
I still love him.
At the favorite seat.
They call it the Seat of Death.
He's so cool!
What a loser!
Ah, you're a tough one!
Let's inaugurate the register.
With a nice three.
He doesn't know how much I like him.
Even though he humiliated me, I forgive him.
If I could hold him tight, just once, I'd make him understand.
Call me, my love.
Call me, call me... ...call me....
-One...
-I'll go! ...two...
...three....
Yes, it's morning here!
I'll pass you to her right away.
And how are you?
Melissa, run, it's Dad!
Melissa!
Open up!
It's Dad!
Why do you two always lock yourselves in there?
Do you want to talk first to your mother or your daughter?
Daddy, you know I dreamt about you?
Yes, we were in Paris, but it was our house.
It'd be more practical if you used your own bathroom.
-I'm being good.
But you be good too!
-At least don't lock yourselves inside.
No, I'm begging you!
Please, don't smoke.
-It bothers me in the bathroom.
-I'm still waiting for your e-mails.
I'll quit right away!
I'm smoking the last one!
I'll pass you to her.
Hi, darling!
Of course I'm taking my medicine.
Why do you always say the same thing?
And then they say that old folks lose their minds!
"Dear Diary, my family is a disaster.
Father is so far away, Mother doesn't understand a thing.
Thank God I've got Grandma and Manuela, my best friend."
Slow down!
You shouldn't be afraid with me!
Ever!
Okay, but be careful!
-You trust me?
-Yes, you're the best!
I hate gym... ...but I'm sure Manu hates it more than I
do.
At least we don't have to study.
This year I want something different.
Every day at school I hope to see him.
It's happened twice already, in the hallway.
He didn't see me, or he pretended not to.
How strange, I feel my body much more than before.
I like it... ...but with him I'd like it even more.
Did you get excited?
Wow, you're well-equipped!
Who would have thought?
Relax, it's just envy.
I want him.
I'm so sure.
Yes, I went to see the one you suggested.
It looked like a prison!
No, I found another one.
A luxury one.
Wait a moment.
Here it is!
"Elegant ambience... ...highly qualified medical personnel."
Eighteen hundred euros.
No, I still haven't spoken to her about it.
You know it's not easy with her.
Why don't you speak to her?
Okay, okay.
I'll try.
Melissa?
Yes, she'll be upset at the beginning, but later....
You know how children are.
Don't worry, I was firm about the moped... ...but she always drives Manuela's.
She signed up for swimming lessons.
This time she's really going to learn.
Hello?
Can you hear me?
Hello? Elvira!
I lent it to Melissa but now I need it.
I'm having tea with some friends.
How can you live with such a mess?
At least in my own room I can do as I please, no?
Here, this was in the living room.
Forgive me.
It won't happen again.
I promise.
How can you go out at this hour?
Do you want me to come pick you up?
Don't worry, I'll take the bus.
No, no, take a cab.
Cabs are expensive.
It's okay.
I'll pay for it, don't make me worry.
I have to talk to you... ...but not now, you've got things to do.
Tell me, my friends will wait.
-Did you take your pill?
-Yes.
No, I didn't take it.
But that's my business.
No, really it's our business also.
They are good for your heart.
My mum hates Grandma.
Sometimes I think... ...it's because she's jealous of our relationship.
Thank God she can't interfere between Manu and me.
I adore her.
According to her, I need to be brave... ...and talk to Daniele, face to face.
They said Daniele's already here!
Look at me.
Look at me.
Look at me.
Look at me.
But you're Melissa!
You've grown, I almost didn't recognize you.
How old are you?
I'm almost 16.
Come.
Arnaldo, you remember Melissa?
Melissa....
You're also cute when dry.
Congratulations.
Let's toast to our reunion!
-Lavinia, babe?
Everything okay?
-I want to leave.
This is annoying.
Did you think about me?
I want to ask you something.
But not here.
Wanna come with me?
Let's go.
You're even prettier than last summer.
Can I ask you a question?
Do you want to kiss me?
Are you still a virgin?
Yes.
Do you want to do it with me?
I want you so much.
Put this on.
I love you.
I love you.
I love you.
I don't love you.
You're an idiot.
Who asked you?
Dad, dear Dad... ...you can't imagine how much I'd like you
to be here.
I would tell you to go to Daniele's house, to spit on his face...
...to make him kneel, to beat him...
...humiliate him as he did with me.
But why is it that only men can behave like that?
From this moment on I swear that I too will do as they do.
I will think only of my pleasure.
I will treat them all the same.
Not caring for their feelings... ...not caring who I have in front of me.
Your daughter, Melissa.
But no!
What are you talking about?
No, I know you, Daria.
You've already decided everything.
Actually, you know what I think?
I'll probably feel more at home over there than here.
Your attention gets on my nerves.
I know it's sincere... ...but it's irritating all the same.
I'm worried about Melissa.
She counts on me.
And on me!
Are you sure?
Why do you treat me like this?
Are you sure I can smoke here?
-If not, I'm not going.
-In theory you can't... ...but everybody does, so they turn a blind
eye.
Unfortunately.
You should quit.
You know how bad it is for you.
And you don't know how good it is for me!
"Dear Diary, Mom has sent Grandma to a home."
-Damn, it's pouring!
-Give me the umbrella.
"She took the horrible decision without consulting me.
I don't mean anything to her.
But when Dad comes home for Christmas... ...we'll take her back home and she will stay
with us forever."
Do you want to give me the umbrella?
Elvira, what are you doing?
You'll get soaked!
Sweetheart, why are you doing this?
You know Grandma has a heart condition.
She needs to be taken care of!
Come on, out!
Thank you.
Good morning.
Well, now what's the matter?
Up, up child!
Nice, no?
Warm colors....
The nurses are lovely.
I would almost come to stay myself!
Where are the sockets?
Ah, there's one....
-But the lamp's plugged.
-It needs a double plug!
Surely there is one.
Found it!
There you go.
-They're so organized!
-Aren't they?
Home is where the radio is.
It has changed my life!
Grandma....
I'll go call the head nurse.
Melissa!
Melissa, don't be sad.
Nothing will ever change between us.
You'll come visit whenever you want... ...and I'll make you a marvelous cup of tea.
You really don't mind being here?
"Paradise is where I am," your grandpa used to say.
A fantastically self-centered man!
Here we go.
Watch how it's done.
Let's get rid of this shitty old lady blanket!
See?
It's something else entirely!
Doesn't take a thing.
Grandma!
Grandma!
Don't cry, my treasure!
-It's not a goodbye!
-But you're the one who's crying!
Music!
Your favorites!
Risotto with mushrooms or paella?
Nothing.
Don't worry about me.
You only know how to hurt.
Sweetheart!
Why do you treat me like this?
What trouble did she give you?
You should be happy now.
Finally your ashtrays will be clean.
You're angry with me?
I adore Grandma!
Without her the house will be empty.
Believe me, I'm sorrier than you are.
So let's go and bring her back.
-Now!
-Sweetheart....
She'll be happier there.
I met her neighbors.
Really nice people! Daddy would have never allowed it.
Yes, he would.
We decided it together.
Liar.
Melissa... ...stay with me for a while.
"Dear Diary, my mother is a monster.
And my father?
Did they agree?
I can't believe it.
But if it were true...?
I
want to rebel but there's nothing I can do.
I don't count."
How did it go with your grandma?
I'm in the movies with my mother.
Boring!
MANU "Now I'm alone.
Completely alone.
Rage, rage, rage.
Fury, rage, fury...."
I can't believe it!
There's the new guy, Marco!
He's gorgeous!
What do I do?
Do I say hi?
Why don't you answer?
Okay....
Remember that asshole from Italian interrogates us tomorrow.
Ciao!
"Today is my birthday.
Mum gave me a present that I'll never open.
Dad called when I was out and did not try again.
To wake up without Grandma is horrible.
The house is empty without her."
No grades today.
We'll read the newspaper.
"According to a recent poll... ...seventy-five percent of Italians are practicing
Catholics."
"I am 16, I'm not a child anymore.
I want to be cruel to the world as the world has been cruel to me."
May I interrupt your makeup session, Titti?
Do you believe in something?
I, for example, I'm agnostic.
At home they all
go to Mass.
So during Mass, do you also think only of re-applying your makeup?
-The twins there, "roses and flowers"?
He put his hand in his pocket.
-Why?
-Take a wild guess!
What do you want to do?
-I'm going!
-So am I.
Let's go!
See?
Easy, no?
You're crazy!
Nobody will be able to hurt me again.
I will defeat pain with rage.
I cut my face with a razor.
Hurt like hell, but I resisted.
I am strong.
I don't cry.
I don't cry.
I don't cry.
Dad has finally called to say he wasn't coming for Christmas.
WINTER Elvira!
Melissa!
-Sorry I'm late.
-No problem.
You look fabulous!
Melissa, come quick, Grandma's here!
Grandma!
Melissa!
My love, my love....
So, what happened to my armchair?
Don't you like that one?
It's much more comfortable.
It's ugly.
No, it's a very famous design.
One of Mrs. Adele's clients suggested it!
How did you scratch yourself?
It's nothing....
What did you cook for me?
Hang on.
It's almost ready!
I just have to heat it up.
Soy sauce or chili sauce?
Tea first.
Will you make it for me?
-Apple tea?
-Yes.
So?
Melissa is having problems.
She's going through a difficult time.
What are you talking about?
She seems very calm to me.
But do you ever look in her eyes?
Of course!
Melissa is still a child.
She doesn't even have a boyfriend.
I think you should keep a closer eye on her.
I know her.
Why, and I don't?
Here, Grandma.
-Nothing for me?
-Melissa.
My room!
She's turned it into a utility closet!
Just so you know, food's on the table in six minutes!
I knew it was here!
Now I'm going to show you something you've never seen.
I knew she wouldn't be able to find it!
Good.
Close the door.
Wow, Grandma!
You're stunning!
He wanted me like that.
-Grandpa?
-No, before.
I was just a little older than you.
Two... ...three...
...four... ...five....
We escaped to Paris together.
Were you in love?
Only at night.
He didn't understand me... ...just my body.
And I understood his.
During the day, I despised him.
But I couldn't live without him.
He cheated on me... ...he humiliated me...
...but then, with one kiss...
...I'd forgive him everything.
One night, he didn't come back.
He'd gone off with someone else.
Without a word.
But he had forgotten his gun.
I thought to myself, "Do I shoot myself?
Or him?"
But then I found myself in front of a mirror... ...and I started to brush my hair, like this...
...stroke... ...after stroke...
...after stroke....
My curls melted away....
How many are we at?
Thirty-four.
Why do we have to reach exactly 100?
Because at the hundredth stroke... ...my hair was back to being straight.
I looked at myself.
He had no power over me anymore.
I was a different person.
Thirty-five, thirty-six... ...thirty-seven, thirty-eight...
...thirty-nine....
"Dear Diary, another year has begun.
New Year, new Melissa.
I will kick anything that I don't like... ...and I'll find love, and pleasure...
...and tenderness, and passion...."
Yes?
It's Daniele.
-Hi.
-Just "Hi"?
-What am I supposed to say?
-For example: "Long time no see!
-Where have you been, Daniele?"
-Right: Where have you been?
And you?
-Where have you been?
-Nowhere.
Did you miss me?
I missed you.
Can I ask if you want to come over, right away...
...to make love?
-You mean like last time?
-Much better.
I have a surprise for you.
Melissa... ...you still there?
Melissa?
Are you coming?
Yes.
Melissa....
You've really changed.
Is this the surprise?
No.
It's much better.
Close your eyes.
Now wait here.
Don't move.
Sit still.
Daniele?
Keep your eyes closed!
Is he the surprise?
Why?
Don't you like it?
I thought you wanted to be with me.
Wait.
Wait.
Three is a good number.
You'll see, you'll like it.
I also have a surprise.
I'm leaving.
Don't be such a baby.
Baby?
Daniele and Arnaldo together?
Are you insane?
I don't know what happened to me.
At some point something switched on inside me...
...rage, I wanted to teach them a lesson... ...show them that I'm not their little toy.
And you know something?
I liked it!
I don't know how to explain it.
I felt completely alive.
And... ...did you have an orgasm?
No.
I love you, but you're wrong about this.
Those guys are gonna go around telling everyone.
Promise me that you won't do it again!
I love you too.
Melissa, what are you doing?
You're destroying your nails!
Please.
"I discovered sex-chats.
You don't suffer, you enjoy yourself and that's it.
I'm Myself, I'm looking for someone to have sex with anyone."
Melissa!
Why do you lock yourself in?
Could you help me fold the tulle, please?
Fine!
I'm coming!
"In the chat I can say whatever comes to my mind.
