America thank you for choosing me as the Republican nominee for president of the
United States. And now the moment you've all been waiting for
when i move my politics slightly to the left. Here are my brand new policies in a fun
new format
the kids are going to love it it's going to be great they're going to love it
it's so great I call it
Trump Code
Trump code number one: there's still going to be a border well it's going to
be a great while a big wall but there will be some openings for instance
there's going to be a takeout window
it's going to be the most beautiful takeout window you've ever seen you can
get gorditas you can get chalupas you want a Spanish tutor
I could tell you this you can take it home with you it will be a beautiful
Spanish tutor -And Mexico
to be fair there's gonna be a wall on every border that's right take out windows a'
plenty
it's gonna be like America is inside one giant mall that's also a prison in the
It'll pay for itself
Trump code number two: Isis it's still a problem
it's a great problem it's a big problem I'm gonna tell you something here's what
we're gonna do we're gonna torture and kill all the family members
that's not changing however we all know that every family has at least one gay
uncle
and we know how that religion feels about the gays let me tell you something
I know the gays
I love gays I have never met a gay uncle who was a terrorist
so here's what we're gonna do we're going to identify all of the gay uncles
that are related to Isis and we're gonna pardon them and of course the other
family members were gonna torture and kill for information
Trump code number three abortions
obviously we need abortions look at the candidates I just ran against ok I mean
we need abortions
let me tell you something however if you have an unwanted pregnancy and your hot
and, big and here, the father is also a good-looking guy
the US government will pay you to raise it ok we need hot people everyone loves
hot people hot people make the world go round let's kill the Uglies and all the
high autism risk pregnancies trip code number four
okay three words black lives matter all right they do they matter they matter so
much i love black lives and i love that they matter and they do its because they
do
here's what we're going to do i hear your pain every white cop is going to
mentor a young black kid that's what's gonna happen it's gonna be like a buddy
cop situation it's very entertaining it's very heart warming I'm talking about
lethal weapon with mel gibson and samuel l jackson 48 hours with Nick Nolte and
again samuel l jackson beverly hills cop and all those great white guys and
Samuel L Jackson
I mean it really is great if you don't love a white guy in a black guy fighting
bad guys then your the bad guy and I'm coming for you see that I can be
conservative and liberal it's not hard i love liberals I love conservatives
I love this video format I really do this is great the kids are gonna love
this