Practice English Speaking&Listening with: The Gumshoe Diaries: Case of the Day Off Dame, Episode One

Today was my big day off. I'd finally solved a case which meant it was payday.

Which meant it was laundry day.

Which is why I always insist on getting paid in cold hard quarters.

I was looking forward to having clean clothes again.

For the past few days I've been wearing nothing but my trusty trench coat and

have a pair of matching socks.

See you in an hour toots.

It was time for a time-killing stroll God knows it was cold as hell

but Spring was right around the corner and the city was about to change from deathly white

to life-affirming gray.

All that walking was giving my appetite and direction so I went to the dollar store

and bought 40 quarters worth of dollars.

I bought an armload of hot dogs from a street vendor and head back to my office.

In many ways the office has become my home away from home.

Especially since I'd been evicted from my actual home

Little did I know that the course of my life is about to change,

and little did I know in general

(Prolonged Knocking)

Please, you to have to find my husband's killer.

Normally I don't take walkins but in this case I was happy to make an exception.

The woman possessed a rare classical beauty like Greta Garbo or Pam Anderson.

Being a gentleman I resisted the urge to undress her with my hands.

As far as I know my husband had no enemies.

The said that beauty is only skin deep, but I was willing to bet that even her skeleton could give me a boner.

And don't get me started on her voice. She could take a boring sentence like:

My husband was smothered to death in his bed

...and make it sound like pillow talk

Shouldn't you be taking notes or something?

Was she flirting with me? It seemed too good to be true

but after decades of boozy solitude this could be a real game-changer.

I pondered our future together; get married

maybe move upstate and live on a nice little farm.

I always wanted to run my own gumshoe dairy

and kids would be fine.

In fact, becoming a father would be a seminal achievement.

But would should be able to support me and the kids financially?

On a brave impulse I leaned in for a kiss

But she recoiled as her nostrils flared wildly.

Was she inviting me to have nasal sex?

After a lifetime of serial suffering I knew it was dangerous to get my hopes up.

Sure we were off to a good start, but would this unlikely love story be continued?