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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Cartoon Pope Francis Roasts Donald Trump

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OH, TRUMP VISITED THE VATICAN, VISITED THE VATICAN.

THAT'S EXCITING.

IT'S ONE OF THE FEW PLACES ON EARTH WITH MORE OLD MEN THAN HIS

CABINET.

( LAUGHTER ) IF YOU REMEMBER, BACK DURING THE

CAMPAIGN, TRUMP BUTTED HEADS WITH THE POPE OVER IMMIGRATION,

SO PEOPLE WERE EXPECTING THIS FIRST MEETING TO BE A BIT TENSE.

AND BASED ON THIS PICTURE, IT WAS.

"I WAS WRONG.

I WAS WRONG.

THERE IS NO GOD."

( LAUGHTER ) I DON'T KNOW WHY THEY CALL HIM

"THE JOYFUL POPE."

MAYBE THIS IS JUST THE WAY HE ACTS WHEN HE MEETS WORLD

LEADERS.

JIMMY, GOT A PHOTO OF HIM WITH ANYBODY ELSE?

OH!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪ I HAD THE TIME OF MY LIFE

AND NEVER FELT THIS WAY BEFORE ♪ ♪

AFTERWARDS, WHEN ASKED FOR HIS IMPRESSION OF THE POPE, TRUMP

SAID, "HE IS SOMETHING."

( LAUGHTER ) THAT IS TRUE.

THAT IS TRUE.

HARD TO ARGUE WITH THAT.

THE POPE IS, INDEED, SOMETHING.

AS JESUS HIMSELF SAID, "BLESSED ARE THE VAGUE FOR THEY SHALL.

INHERIT...

YOU KNOW, STUFF."

( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

BLESSED.

AS IS CEREMONIAL AS USUAL WHEN YOU MEET WORLD LEADERS THEY

EXCHANGED GIFTS.

THE TWO MEN EXCHANGED GIFTS.

THE POPE GAVE TRUMP A COPY OF HIS 2017 PEACE MESSAGE AND HIS

ENCYCLICAL ON CLIMATE CHANGE, "LAUDATO SI."

AND AFTER RECEIVING THE GIFTS, TRUMP REPLIED, "WELL, I'LL BE

READING THEM."

( LAUGHTER ) WELL, NO, YOU WON'T.

MIKE PENCE, I THINK I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GETTING FOR CHRISTMAS.

REGIFT!

BUT THE BEST PART OF THE VISIT HAPPENED AT THE END, WHEN THE

POPE THREW A LITTLE SHADE AT TRUMP'S PHYSIQUE.

FRANCIS TURNED TO THE FIRST LADY AND SAID, "WHAT DO YOU GIVE HIM

TO EAT, POTIZZA?" WHICH IS A HIGH-CALORIE PASTRY

SERVED IN SLOVENIA.

OH, SNAP!

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) THE POPE-- WHAT DO YOU FEED HIM,

POTIZZA?

THE POPE JUST CALLED THE PRESIDENT CHUBBY!

( LAUGHTER ) I CANNOT BELIEVE THE INFALLIBLE

VICAR OF CHRISTS JUST PLAYED THE DOZENSES ON OUR PRESIDENT.

FOR MORE, PLEASE WELCOME, LIVE VIA SATELLITE, CARTOON POPE!

>> Stephen: YOUR CARTOON HOLINESS, THANK YOU FOR JOINING

US.

>> THANK YOU FOR HAVING ME, STEPHEN.

>> Stephen: SO, DO YOU REGRET MAKING THAT CRACK ABOUT TRUMP'S

WEIGHT?

>> YES, MY CHILD, BECAUSE ALTHOUGH WE MAY NOT LOVE HIS

ACTIONS, WE MUST LOVE THE SINNER-- ALMOST AS MUCH AS THE

SINNER LOVES THE DINNER.

HA-HA, NAILED HIM!

>> Stephen: OKAY, BUT, CARTOON POPE, YOU'RE KNOWN FOR YOUR

COMPASSION AND KINDNESS.

WHY ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF HIM?

>> YOU ARE RIGHT, STEPHEN.

JESUS TAUGHT US TO LOVE-- AND THERE'S A LOT OF HIM TO LOVE!

AM I RIGHT, FOLKS?

YES, I AM ALWAYS RIGHT.

I'M THE POPE.

( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: OKAY, IS IT OUT OF

YOUR SYSTEM NOW?

WHAT ELSE DID YOU DO WITH TRUMP ON HIS VISIT?

>> I GAVE HIM A TOUR OF THE VATICAN CATACOMBS.

>> Stephen: OH, REALLY?

THAT'S NICE.

>> BUT WHEN TRUMP ENTERED, IT BECAME THE FATICAN FATACOMBS!

OH!

( LAUGHTER ) OH!

>> Stephen: WHAT JUST HAPPENED TO YOUR VOICE?

>> THEY CALL ME FRANCIS DICE POPE!

OH!

SIGH, STEPHEN, DO YOU KNOW WHY TRUMP LOVES VLADIMIR PUTIN.

HE'S ALWAYS PUTTING FOOD IN HIS FACE.

>> Stephen: THESE ARE BEGINNING TO STRETCH.

HICKORY, DICKORY, DOPE!

TRUMP JUST GOT BURNED BY THE POPE!

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