Practice English Speaking&Listening with: ShakesvilleFundraiser.wmv

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Look who's here -- I didn't see you before

You know, it's really interesting -- I was thinking about everybody who was gonna come tonight

and I was thinking "Gosh, most of these people are gonna be, like, my friends --

my close personal friends

and I was really happy 'cause it felt like I had a lot of them

So, um, and I hope I have a lot more I mean, now the rest of you

who aren't my close personal friends

but perhaps would like to be . . . .

I'm an accessible kinda gal

So anyway, how many of you guys remember No on 8?

(applause, then boos, hissing)

One of the, uh, wonderful things brought to you by . . . the OCA

Uhm, well, I had kind of a bad reaction to No on 8 . . .

. . . it kind of gave me a rash . . .

like a spiritual rash? You know?

Did any of you experience that?

I got mighty mad, frankly,

but you know, they're never gonna know the kind of creative fervor

that they gave to me

because some great songs came out of No on 8

as far as I was concerned.

And, um, a lot of it had to do with, like --

you know, don't you love what they call us? I love this --

Now, like, my mom is sitting there, and my mom says to me --

now, you have to understand my mother doesn't talk much

about anything that isn't, like, couldn't be printed in a public newspaper?

You know, like anything like feelings?

You know -- the "F" word?

We don't talk about that.

So, anyway, my mother comes and kind of takes me aside

one time when I was home and she goes --

"How do" -- my -- we have two boys at home --

my partner's kids and .... my kids and .... well, yeah, my kids --

OK, so, anway Oh, we just got that settled,

just like that! If it's OK with you

Um, and, uh -- my mother says:

"So how do the boys feel about your situation?"

You know, other people have relationships. Not me! I have a "situation".

And a friend of mine said: "Well, at least you don't have a condition."

You know, they call us these great words -- this is my favorite: "Unnatural"

I love that they call us unnatural--

and I love WHO calls us unnatural--

people like Tammy Faye Bakker.

You know -- is she under there?

You kind of feel like you could whittle her down and

there'd be nothing in there!

So, anyway --

(Audience: "It's where Jimmy Hoffa's buried . . .")

Oh! This is one of my hecklers, Myra -- I'd like you all to give her a round . . .

(applause)

Myra's been through the Carol Steinel School of Heckling.

See, I've been on a campaign lately

because there are a lot of great musicians and comics in our country

but very few good hecklers -- you know?

So I've been trying to develop a cadre of -- love that word -- cadre of hecklers

and Myra's a graduate of the class of '88

and proud of it

She was on the Varsity Heckling Team!

Now, so, I wrote some songs,

and I call them "The Hate Trilogy"

and they're kind of about my experience with Right Wing Fundamentalist types

Now the first one, there is already a song called this

but I decided it was kind of a big topic, so probably it could accomodate two songs,

you know, called the same thing but you'll recognize it --

It's called: God is Love

When I was young, when I was small --

they said: God is love, and that is all.

God is love -- and there are no exceptions.

But later on, of course, they started makin' a few corrections.

They said God is love, yes, God is love --

except there are a few things that God hates.

Such as Queers --

and peace-lovin' hippies.

but of course they changed that later

to Queers, and --

Liberal Straights.

Well I got older -- yes, I grew up --

and they said: God loves you, if you love Him.

I thought that was fair. Yes, I could understand it

but later on, of course, they began to expand it.

They said God is love, yes God is love

except there are a few things that God hates:

Such as queers, and mutineers,

and commies and pinkos and papists,

and peace-lovin' hippies,

'cept later on of course they changed that

to queers and mutineers and commies and pinkos and papists

and ---

Liberal Straights

I got a little older, as we sometimes do,

and they said:

"God will destroy you if you don't do what He says."

I said: "Well, what does He say?"

And they said: "Don't worry, we'll tell you that later."

And I said, "Wait a minute! What about God is Love?"

and then they gave me that funny look.

They said: God IS love. God IS love -- except there are a few things that God HATES!

Such as queers and mutineers and commies and pinkos and papists

and people that aren't like US

and people who ask too many questions!

and peace-lovin' hippies,

but you know, later on they changed the last part -- to . . . .

hmm?

Liberal Straights.

I went to therapy for five or six years

I joined the ACLU and NARAL and even NOW

I healed the damage that they did

all my spiritual contusions

yes, I made my break away I started drawin' my own conclusions.

Would you like me to share them with you?

(Audience: Yes!)

I think God is love and God is love

and then God is love and then God is love some more

And God loves queers and mutineers and God loves commies and pinkos and papists

and God loves people that aren't like them

(God even loves people that are like them, although I don't understand it)

and God loves peace loving hippies

and God loves people that ask too many questions

and I happen to have it on the very best authority that He -- or She --

just adores liberal straights.

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