Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Stargate Czech parody

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Counselor: We've gathered here today

To discuss the financial problems of the project

gassiness of General Hammond

and Tealc wedding with Ouneil.

Daniel: I would start with General Hammond. He could finally learn not to fart in our presence.

Three times there was a biological alert. Our base was uninhabitable.

Jack: He's a stinkard.

Counselor: I personally think it's not General Hammond's fault.

Jack: No sir. It's because we don't have money for food, so Hammond must eat the garbage.

We had our last Goauld a week ago and lemon biscuits are no good.

Counselor: I like them. Don't insult lemon biscuits.

Jack: You eat them even with the cover, don't you?

Counselor: So what?

Hammond: Who likes lemon biscuits, stand up.

Counselor: Lemon biscuits are the best. We don't have money for anything else and if you mind, your fault.

I decided to end this program immediately.

I must go to listen to a bedtime story. Now

Daniel: It's only 6PM.

Unknown man: Your clock must be off.

Daniel: Wait a minute, sir. We could go to ABC-123 through gate.

Counselor: Hurry. Bedtime story is in national security interest.

Daniel: If you let us, we'll give you this nice yellowed paper.

Counselor: Ehh.. And what can I do with it?

You stay quiet.

Daniel: It's an universal paper from Goauld company Apofis&son.

Their company resides at ABC-123. We will bring you more if you let us.

Counselor: Agreed. I must have those.

Daniel: Sir. They have splendid food and golden layered walls too.

Tealc: Tons and tons of Goaulds, just fry them.

Counselor: I agree with you completely.

Daniel: So when should we head on?

Counselor: ASAP.

Jack: I don't get it people. What's that Gate you're talking about.

Counselor: Sorry Ouneil, you wouldn't understand.

Tealc: If I'm not mistaken, you don't know it yourself, so shut up. Your security guards can help you with that.

Counselor: What does that thing on your forehead mean? dumbness?

Jack: No! it's his money.

Tealc: I can buy all Bedtime stories of the world with that and shut them down, so don't piss me off.

Daniel: Die.

Counselor: Ok.

Hammond: NOW I FART!!!

The Description of Stargate Czech parody