We have to find an answer to a very important question.
That wasn’t it, of course. We need to ask ourselves a question
of whether we want to live like Chinese people.
By the way, this is a map
that tracks live how many people
are infected with this new Chinese virus.
What? If there are websites with live footage of people...
why can’t there be a website
with live footage of an illness spreading?
And it’s really a live count,
the statistics have changed since my last visit.
So, 42 people died,
39 people recovered,
1438 confirmed cases...
For now, France seems to be Europe’s only representative,
from what I can see. There are three confirmed cases there.
And here you can check the statistics in respective cities in China.
Well, not only in China.
You can check how many cases have been confirmed,
how many people are under observation...
It’s a pity there is no live camera feed, so that we could literally watch someone get worse.
I think we, as Poles, would be the most zealous fans of this sport.
Gambling sites would jump on the bandwagon right away.
Edwin! That Chinese guy on whose recovery you bet 50 quid... Has he died?
But I can clearly see that he’s not moving.
See? He’s being taken away already.
Mate, the fatality rate of this virus is like 4%,
you had a 96% chance of succeeding.
I’m never taking the same elevator as you.
I don’t think this is insensitive. I’m a very sensitive guy, you know.
Probably some fatso took a pratfall here
and they just went and closed the ride.
Let’s just add that the website showing how many, where and how fast people are dying from the coronavirus
has been created by American scientists, obviously.
But we were supposed to ask ourselves not how to die like Chinese people,
but how to live like Chinese people.
So it’s not about the coronavirus,
but about the measures taken by the police in Great Britain.
In England. Well, in London.
There, the police are to deploy facial recognition cameras
that will monitor people on the streets in popular parts of London
and compare pedestrians’ faces
with known faces of exceptionally dangerous criminals.
Allegedly, this would help the police arrest said wrongdoers.
Which is only logical, because dangerous criminals
never forgo strolling leisurely in the most popular places that they’ve read up on in all the British media
as being packed with facial recognition cameras.
Oh, and one more thing. All those criminals will be strolling there
without any caps or sunglasses.
Mate, criminals don’t read.
Stupid criminals don’t read, but those are not dangerous, because they’re stupid,
maybe except for some idiots that have become dangerous criminals by accident.
Dangerous criminals are dangerous because they are smart,
so they are bound to read, and less threatening idiots won’t be on the list,
so I can’t even...
In reality, it’s all gibberish that it’s a trap for dangerous criminals,
it’s a trap for us... I mean for you... Poland for Lon... London for Poles!
who simply walk down the street and slap a random guy on the face,
because he’s been a bit too nice to your girlfriend.
I talked with Chinese people
who don’t slap anybody, because they are so afraid
of the cameras watching their every step.
I asked them about their opinion about said cameras, and they were like...
“Well, as long as I don’t hurt the party, the party won’t hurt me, right?”
Now that’s very convin... No! It’s not convincing at all!
Even if we take into account that European countries are democratic,
so, at least in theory, less authoritarian than the communist China,
There are more idiots in democracy, so idiots vote for idiots,
and that’s why the person who would be responsible for facial recognition cameras
is probably the very same guy
who got his sandwiches laced with your cat’s poop back in the school days,
and he stuffed his mouth without realising that something was off,
and he would’ve never learned about it, if it weren’t for the fact
that school pranks like that are rarely kept in secret for long.
And such people don’t forget,
even if the guilty sick bastard of a cat has long been dead.
Such a guy can throw your entire family into jail
for illegally importing products for sale from China,
whereas you simply bought your girlfriend a handbag...
by Louis Versace.
I’m making things up right now, but you know what I mean, it’s stupid.
And why is it stupid?
Because the British had been testing this system for like... three years.
And independent studies have shown that in over 80% of cases,
the system matches innocent people to possible suspects.
So its efficiency rate is like 20%.
Less efficient than that
is only the coronavirus from China, but that too is probably just a matter of time.
So the situation is fairly clear.
On Friday evening, you walk down the street, cameras spot you,
send a signal to the police, the police arrest you,
you forgot your wallet,
you don’t have your documents on you,
so you can’t prove that you’re not the guy the cameras think you are.
Subsequently, you spend the entire weekend at the police station,
on Monday, they take you to some VIP guy who stares at you and...
“Nope, definitely not, he’s not Marek.
Marek was... I’d recognise Marek with my eyes closed.
This is some kind of mistake.”
Well, it is a mistake, you go home, but that weekend could’ve been different.
For example, you could’ve spent it with a half-humanoid robot.
Now riddle me this: “What is a half-humanoid robot?”
It’s a humanoid robot without legs.
But don’t get too excited, you probably wouldn’t have spent a weekend with it anyway,
because Indians are planning on sending it into space.
I wasn’t joking when I mentioned the legs.
Vyommitra, because that’s what the robot is called, is able to communicate with astronauts,
entertain them and do work for them.
Under the condition that the work in question doesn’t involve legs, heheh.
This time, however, it won’t have company, as it will go into space by itself... herself.
In an unmanned spacecraft.
And it’s not that other Indian astronauts... we know how this sounds...
argued that this half-humanoid robot can’t be a real Indian because of the lack of legs.
And that if someone doesn’t have legs, they can’t work at Uber Eats.
It’s that the previous Indian mission to the Moon...
didn’t have... well, the smoothest of landings.
Or I’ll just call a spade a spade – they crashed.
Well, they did land all right, but crashed so hard
that if they had had a robot with legs, it would have broken them.
So maybe that’s the idea behind the half-humanoid robot.
And since we’re already talking about...
a questionable way of delivering things that should be delivered...
I brought up this issue in my live program in LA...
Listen, we all knew...
I knew while buying this smartphone that Escobar wouldn’t send it.
And that was an argument in the discussion.
I mean I spent all that money so that if someone says...
“Oh, Escobar sends those phones for sure,”
I would be able to answer, “No, mate, I bought one and it hasn’t been delivered.”
But you still ask me about this matter.
Your faith in the integrity of retired Columbian mafiosos is really touching,
so I must state it once again, loud and clear:
I haven’t received my foldable smartphone from Roberto Escobar,
and most likely never will.
But Mati went to the Polish premiere of a foldable Motorola.
It’s similar in the case of the new Razr.
This phone too is quite impressive, especially the way it folds...
This phone is solidly built.
The video was brought to you by Mateusz Jeznach.
I mean, their microphone really broke down as they were recording.
But on the other hand... That is, on the hand of the YouTube browser,
we can see that the first impressions of this phone were published like two months ago.
So I concluded that we wouldn’t make a video entitled
“First impressions by Klawiatur,
just two months after all the other first impressions you can find online.”
So Mateusz went there only to take a couple of photos and make a short video,
so that we could use them to...
Unfortunately, Mati got us such high-quality footage that...
I’m not sure if the problem lies in his photography artistry and film-making virtuosity
or in the fact that in the pre-production version of their foldable smartphone
Motorola used a camera module from an old Alcatel.
I hope they will fix it before the smartphone goes on sale,
but I don’t have high hopes of receiving it for testing
after such fantastic first impressions.
But the fault lies not with me, but with the first impressions, they simply aren’t great.
Maybe that’s why Samsung doesn’t allow anyone
to take photos or make films with the use of its cameras...
I mean its smartphones... I mean its smartphones’ cameras,
during said first impressions.
By the way, S20 premieres...
in slightly over two weeks.
Mati is going to the pre-premiere meeting, so we have a lot to look forward to.
I know from certain sources
that the camera in S20...
still doesn’t work the way it should, so it may be interesting.
When was the last time you’ve been to a Bose store?
The company that manufactures various audio elements, I mean audio products.
When was the last time you’ve been to a Bose store?
There you have it.
Because if you had visited a Bose store, they wouldn’t be closing them all right now.
Bose is shutting down all brick-and-mortar stores in the USA, Europe, Japan and Australia.
Stores in China, the UAE, India, South Korea and Southeast Asia will stay open.
The closings are to take place within the next several months.
So your closest Bose’s store will soon be a bit farther away than it is now...
Well, not like you visit them anyway, so...
But you won’t be able to buy the best audio sunglasses right off the bat.
Because in my opinion, Bose makes the best audio sunglasses.
These too are audio sunglasses that you’ve seen in my footage from CES.
The Chinese were so kind as to send them for testing.
They are pretty cool, at least aesthetically-wise,
since they are a combination of a pimp’s sunglasses straight from the ‘80s with...
You can order them for 110 USD on Kickstarter.
They kind of remind me of Lech Wałęsa. Beats me... why.
They have some advantages.
First of all, they are a lot cheaper, over two times cheaper than Bose’s ones.
Unfortunately, their audio quality is two times worse, minimum.
I mean, if you like clear sound,
you certainly won’t become friends with those sunglasses.
Maybe I’ll review them on... I don’t know, Instagram.
Because doing it on YouTube would be a little...
That being said...
There is a chance we’ll become friends with this camera.
Unfortunately, I got it in the standard version,
so it is not the 1-inch edition,
but the ordinary one.
It’s a wide-angle camera, but not the “wow” one.
And here’s a 360 one...
This version is called... What is it called?
Fortunately, we can check what it looks like.
I said it was a grave threat to GoPro,
so we’ll compare it to GoPro, especially when it comes to lag and freezing.
And I’m not sure whether I should review said camera
or this egg drone, egg 2.0, if you will,
because it’s already the second version of the egg drone.
The previous version of the egg drone...
Well, let’s just simply forget about it, because we don’t need this energy now.
This is the egg drone.
Those are the arms, propellers and engines of the egg drone.
Everything is waterproof.
Here is a special waterproof case.
We were waiting for the rain,
but we’ll have to make do with a watering can or a fire hose...
Well, maybe not a fire hose, but an ordinary one, we’ll see.
So, should we review the drone in this week’s episode
or the camera?
Actually, we could make a survey. The drone or the camera?
What should we test this week?
No one is too old or too popular among guys
whose best sex experience was with their own cousins
to set online trends, as Dolly Parton demonstrated this week.
Dolly tweeted four pictures of herself...
You all know what happened next, you also probably know how it began,
I don’t even know why I am telling you this, maybe you don’t use Twitter.
Anyway, I spent like half of my Saturday, following this hashtag,
so I basically spared you the toil, as it’s not exactly a barrel of laughs,
rather a load of crap, but at any rate...
Social media departments from different companies concluded,
“Yay, we’ll do it as well, this idea for real-time marketing is awesome.”
Various people, Twitter users,
have decided that with the advent of 2020 you can finally admit publicly
to having a Tinder account... and not being ashamed of it.
Yet others have concluded that...
“I’m not two... four-faced, I’m exactly the same on all portals.”
I observed only one interesting trend related to this challenge that I sort of liked,
namely all those older ladies from Facebook...
seem to have signed up to Twitter only to post those four pictures,
thanks to which for the first time ever, at least from my perspective,
I happened upon such tweets as “You’re such a cutie pie, Bertha xx.”
I suppose that’s it for today, class dismissed.
Oh, and don’t download this app for taking 3D pictures.
Unless you have a nicer mug than me.
Well, you probably do.
Okay, so... Have a bearable week.
Subtitling done smart, by LocAtHeart (http://locatheart.com/)