Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Jim Bakker Bucket Taste Test

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today we taste the apocalypse thought

about that

[Music]

good mythical morning today I'm gonna

get transformed into a human chocolate

fountain because why not no reason to

not but first I can hardly contain

myself because what we're about to do

involves two of my favorite things food

and the apocalypse and when we heard

that televangelist Jim Baker was selling

doomsday food stored in buckets we knew

we had to get our hands on one so we did

and now we're gonna eat it and rank it

it's time for

you may remember Jim Baker from back in

the day when he and his wife Tammy Faye

were asking people to give them money to

do things like build a giant holy theme

park yeah well he went to prison for

accounting fraud but now he's back and

he's sellin giant buckets of non

perishable apocalypse food this came to

our attention because Vic burger has

made some hilarious edits of Jim and his

new wife selling the food check it out

dump this it with the rice there it goes

we're dumping 22 gallons into the rice

into the rice

[Music]

but if the world's on fire there's no

gonna be anybody there to put it out Wow

Wow Wow and I mean the music's added by

mr. big burger yeah I mean you're great

to watch in the original he's an editing

hero of ours this point shout-out to him

I just want to say we do not endorse Jim

or his food but we sure do want to eat

it and rank it here we do so let's take

a look at what we got here okay now

there are several different kinds of Jim

Baker buckets we got the tasty pantry

bucket for a hundred and seventy-five

dollars now you can see that it doesn't

have Jim Baker branding on it but this

is the brand that he sells we call it

the Jim Baker bucket but he's actually

selling this food storage for

emergencies

okay so this thing has 18 food varieties

individually packaged 283 servings a

total of forty nine thousand three

hundred and ninety calories total of 28

pounds of food a shelf life of 25 years

and you know what there's a bonus of 60

servings of honey powder and when it's

all done you can just fill it up with

your crap I I seriously think you can

turn this into a a toilet I think guys

may have seen them advertised that okay

now obviously we're not gonna eat every

single food that's sold in a Jim Baker

bucket so we picked out the ones that

appealed to us the most and we're gonna

rank them according to this scale yes

we've got 28 diarrhea's later the crap

sure licking my Apocalypse World War Z

licious and Armageddon are done let's do

this

alright the cheese pizza comes in three

packets pizza crust or breadstick dough

but it's cook pizza sauce got a lot in

there and cheese topping that's all you

need and some water and then you throw

it in an oven to bake it for twelve to

fifteen minutes at 425 degrees

yeah so in the event of apocalypse all

you need is a fully functioning kitchen

to bake this thing and this is what you

get he says there's eight servings but

that's six slices you cut it a little

bit smaller I guess and you got to put

yourself in an apocalyptic mind frame

because it's kind of like camping

everything tastes better dink it it cuz

I can tell you right now in just a

normal setting where I could have access

to any type of heat so I want this is

not stellar this makes CC's look like

something all MasterChef the dough is

very ready but I mean it was only 25

years the ingredients in this inside

your body did to this yep

stays in your stomach for 25 years I

mean it's not horrible the sauce has

some sort of seems to have some sort of

pepperoni meat flavor to them

mm-hmm the topping is not horrible the

bread dough man that's apocalyptic bread

it's not horrible I think we just got to

put it in the middle right yeah for now

rest it right there around licking my

apocalypse let's go deeper into the

apocalypse yeah

alright now we've got the creamy potato

soup this one is super simple he's a

super yeah simple you just take this and

you mix it with some boiling water and

you get this good potato soup now we

actually found a clip of Jim tasting

this himself let's watch I want to eat

some more of this you're not careful

[Music]

[Laughter]

excuse me sir what's the soup of the day

Oh nobody chokes like Jim Baker you know

nobody's Chuck's own soup you know what

I think that that's not a beard a

mustache that's just him Liz laughing up

since the days and it hardens it's just

like old soup oh gosh it's lumpy man

[Laughter]

you can induce choking on yourself with

soup back in the day I would watch some

Jim Baker just for the entertainment

that oh yeah so entertaining again I'm

trying to put it on that scale of

apocalyptic food it's not gonna taste

fresh because it ain't it tastes like

bad bread I see a lot of ingredients

though Wow I can't even begin to read

all of them

lots of preserves several preservatives

I don't think I don't know it stuff is

this better than the pizza is really

just a tough call me that the problem

the reason why I don't think is better

than the pizza is just the consistency

makes me uncomfortable

you know you don't want to be

uncomfortable right right that's not

good for anybody right so put it at for

crap sure it tastes bad too

did I mention that it's not good and I'd

say three bites in I do not want to

finish the ball it's getting worse you

know what my life is not currently at

risk now before we taste these black

bean burgers we found a clip of the jim

bakker show where a guy in a Hawaiian

shirt named Kevin sings a song about

Baker's buckets and the end times to the

tune of my girl and the first verse says

I've got burgers made of beans they're

never fried saw the chips and salsa

keeps me warm way deep inside of course

it is but it's the chorus that I want

you to experience from Kevin

[Music]

day four in time

all these and times and times

oh man I love those before oh my

goodness okay link those people yeah all

right so we've got buns which come

separate from the black mean but we're

cold gosh that is a solid yes it is a

heavy thing so these buns actually are

not part of the burger package but

they're part of the overall bucket it's

like a honey wheat thing so we were like

why not make them into the buns it

smells good black bean burger doesn't

smell bad either make that into his own

black bean burger doesn't smell bad

either end times mean Kevin in our

shirts we'll get right along now hold on

you're adding ketchup

there's no ketchup in the gym bag a

bucket yeah but there's a lot of ketchup

in the apocalypse I mean that's one of

the few things I mean think about that

there's there's whole shelves you go in

there I'm not eating anything that's not

in the bucket I don't know where that

kept us been in the apocalypse it could

be laced with something no this is what

I found in like an old Walmart it was

sealed I did have to kill somebody to

get it but after I murdered an entire

family to get this ketchup Wow

I'm gonna put I'm gonna put it on my

freaking burger end times

okay I'm not because I'm a pop

apocalypse pierced apocalypse dink it I

just respect that

oh did it backwards slam it hard okay

break it this is the apocalypse man

everything's more aggressive that's not

bad man waters dry needs ketchup whoo

yeah that's a good way to do it mmm

that's better so everybody everybody's

using apocalypse low oh you got a nod

your head in order to get it down it's

not bad at all it's so thick I mean

everything that I'm sending down the

elevator just piling up I can feel it

we're only this deep in the ranking just

had the burger by itself

okay I mean

that's a standard fare black bean burger

mm-hmm in my mind I mean not something I

get a restaurant but something you get

those frozen put it up there well you

put it number one kind of one-to-one

Jewish right there in the middle a

little bit okay black bean burger taking

an early lead

who are we kidding this is all just

camping food that with lots of

preservatives I mean there's lots of

these buckets itching by an REI and

everywhere else even this one it's not

Jim Baker certified he's just he's just

got a deal with him to punch it through

on his show you know well but I think

the difference is there's more

preservatives it can last longer and it

comes conveniently portioned into

buckets because you could be gonna

you're gonna go camping with this bucket

you'll be the jerk with the bucket no

don't be the jerk with the bucket simmer

on low heat for 15 minutes let's stand

for 2 to 3 minutes dink it no I'm a

little bit excited about this one

there's some promise I'm goodness hey

dog food like you know like gravy

train when you wet dog food this is ABS

of freakin lutely astoundingly

shockingly

rapture II horrible that is I can't even

it tastes like dog food how do they

achieve that are we sure this isn't the

dog food cuz dog has got to live through

the apocalypse - don't go to eat feed

this to your dog in the apocalypse if

you'll eat it you know Oh God I mean I'm

shocked I mean with how bad it is

[Music]

who said you can't have a little puddin

in the apocalypse yeah yeah Jim Baker

now I'm afraid that this might petrify

my stomach for posterity you know I

don't understand what you mean by that

like my stomach feels like a it's rock

hard right now like it's just I mean

that's refined I think it's still food

products now this one again you just mix

with water but you got to mix it with

cold water and then you got to chill it

so you got to find some way to chill it

and that's what that might be

are you going in alright I'm sorry I

couldn't resist you and I'm thinking

what can you how can you get pudding

wrong it's just pudding but then I

tasted it this is the worst pudding I've

ever taste they got it wrong it's so bad

they got pudding wrong we got pudding

wrong that could be the new slogan we

even got pudding wrong how do you do

that Oh like like all the times all the

pudding you buy yeah I mean you could

just as easily buy powder box pudding

yeah because this won't last for 35

isn't pudding off is that the thing is

that pudding that you just get from

jello it doesn't last five years it must

not I'd be willing to take my chances on

some 25 year old jell-o pudding before I

eat this again

I mean it's not worse than the

stroganoff but the expectations with

pudding were so hot I know I was excited

that's why I couldn't wait to eat it

hey so just just it's just like sawdust

in it what it tastes like maybe that's

what you need maybe you need sawdust in

in time just build you a little home so

alright I feel like the scale is

shifting right yeah is that is this it

is this what we're saying I believe that

this is it

this stroganoff is the is the low end of

nasty the pudding is given it as run for

its money and then you got things that

hey can I make you happy you know I'd

much rather eat these three things in a

relative right that's true but not these

two there you have it the definitive

ranking of the best Baker buckets

apocalypse food none of us really great

but when the apocalypse happens at least

you'll know what food to stock up on and

you know what the world's not over yet

neither is this F

so keep watching to see me get turned

into a human chocolate fountain

dear mythical beasts of the land down

under we're coming to see you in July

get tickets and details on a VIP package

at tor mythicality calm

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