Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Dry Fridays - SNL

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>> ALL RIGHT. WHAT'S UP EVERYONE.

SNAKE A SEAT IF YOU CAN. I'M HUNTER.

CLASS OF '19, AND WELCOME TO UCONN DRY FRIDAYS.

I KNOW YOU'RE ALL HERE BECAUSE YOU WERE CAUGHT DRINKING IN THE

DORMS BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE CAN'T HAVE SOME FUN.

DANA'S GOT SOME 'ZA FOR US. >> AND CHEESY BREAD!

WHAT WHAT? >> NICE!

SO IF IT'S YOUR FIRST TIME AT DRY FRIDAYS GO AHEAD AND

INTRODUCE YOURSELF AND TELL US WHY YOU'RE HERE.

>> OKAY. I CAN GO.

I'M JENNA AND I GOT CAUGHT DRINKING A BEER IN MY SUITE.

IT JUST SUCKS BECAUSE 'TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE MY 21st BIRTHDAY.

>> YEAH, ZERO TOLERANCE POLICY ON CAMPUS.

WHAT'S UP, MAN? >> HEY, I'M KENNY AND I WAS

POURING VODKA INTO A WATER BOTTLE IN THE BATHROOM WHEN MY

R.A. WALKED IN. >> OH, BUSTED.

HI, THERE. >> HEY.

I'M COURTNEY. CLASSIC COLLEGE STORY.

I DRANK 40 BEERS, GOT NAKED, GRABBED A CHAINSAW, AND WENT

BEHIND NORTH QUAD, AND CUT DOWN 35 PINE TREES.

[ LAUGHTER ] I'VE DONE IT, YOU'VE DONE IT,

BUT OF COURSE THIS TIME I GET CAUGHT, RIGHT?

[ LAUGHTER ] >> YEAH, I MEAN, I DON'T KNOW

ABOUT THAT. BUT THAT'S A GOOD SEGUE.

BECAUSE EVERYONE'S DONE OR KNOWS SOMEONE WHO'S DONE SOMETHING

STUPID WHILE DRUNK. RIGHT, DANA?

>> THANKS, HUNT. YES.

FRESHMAN YEAR I HAD A FEW TOO MANY AND MOONED A COP.

>> OH, MY FRIEND R.J. FELL AND KNOCKED OUT THREE OF HIS BOTTOM

TEETH. >> OH, AND LAST WEEKEND I DID A

10-MINUTE SOLO KEG STAND AND GOT SO FADED.

I WAKE UP THE NEXT MORNING I'M LIKE LIKE, WHEN DID I GET A

NO-HAWK? >> A NO-HAWK?

>> IT'S HIKE AN OPPOSITE MOHAWK. >> UH, OKAY.

YEAH. SEE, SOMETIMES IT'S JUST NOT

WORTH IT, RIGHT? >> YEAH, DUDE, TOTALLY.

ANYONE EVER GET WASTED AND TEXT AN EX?

>> YES! >> OR EVER ORDER FOOD AND THEN

PASS OUT BEFORE IT'S DELIVERED? THAT WAS MY MOVE FRESHMAN YEAR.

>> YEAH, BUT DID YOU EVER BLACK OUT AND WHEN YOU WAKE UP YOU

HAVE A DOG-TRACKING CHIP IN YOUR NECK AND YOU'RE LIKE, WHAT IS

THAT? >> NO.

>> YEAH, YOU KNOW, EVERYONE'S GOT A STORY.

COURTNEY, GO AHEAD AND POP THAT BEANIE BACK ON IF YOU WANT.

[ LAUGHTER ] I'LL BE STRAIGHT WITH YOU GUYS.

MY FRESHMAN YEAR, DANA KNOWS ABOUT THIS, I PASSED OUT IN THE

HALL OUTSIDE MY DORM ROOM. >> AND I CAN BEAT THAT.

SPRING WEEKEND I PASSED OUT IN THE TACO BELL BATHROOM.

>> OH, MAN, I CAN'T TOP THAT. BUT ONE TIME I PASSED OUT ON MR.

SHINTO'S ISLAND AND TOTALLY MISSED THE SUBMARINE BACK TO THE

MAINLAND. MR. SHINTO WAS SO MAD AT ME.

YEAH. >> ALL RIGHT.

YEAH. UH, NOT REALLY SURE WHO MR.

SHINTO IS OR WHAT THAT STORY WAS ABOUT, BUT ALL RIGHT.

>> YEAH, AND LIKE IF YOU'RE COLD, FEEL FREE TO GO AHEAD AND

POP THAT BEANIE BACK ON. [ LAUGHTER ]

THE POINT IS DRINKING CAN LEAD TO BAD CHOICES.

LIKE, WHEN I WAS DRUNK AND GOT A TRAMP STAMP.

>> IT'S A MERMAID. >> THANKS, HUNT!

>> I GOT YOU BEAT. YOU KNOW THOSE INDIGENOUS TRIBES

THAT PUT, LIKE DISCS IN THEIR LIPS LIKE THIS?

I GOT THAT BUT I GOT IT -- >> OH, NO, NO, NO.

NO, COURTNEY. WE'LL TAKE YOUR WORD FOR IT.

OKAY? I THINK THEY'VE ALL SEEN THE

HAIRCUT BY NOW SO FEEL FREE TO POP THAT BEANIE BACK ON.

>> GUYS, WE'RE NOT HERE TO LECTURE YOU OR TELL YOU NOT TO

HAVE A GOOD TIME. BUT THE FACT IS THAT HEAVY

DRINKING DOES SOME REAL NASTY STUFF TO YOUR BODY.

>> YEAH, LIKE IF I GO HARD ONE WEEKEND, I GET LIKE HEARTBURN

FOR A WEEK AND I'M JUST LIKE TIRED OF THAT.

>> YEAH, I'M LIKE LEGIT WORRIED ABOUT MY BODY.

A MONTH AGO I GOT BLITZED BY MYSELF AND I GUESS I ATE EGGS OR

SOMETHING. THE NEXT MORNING, SORRY IF THIS

IS KIND OF NASTY. GUY TO THE BATHROOM AND AN EGG

JUST -- IT'S -- IT COMES OUT AND IT'S STILL IN ITS SHELL.

MY BODY IS SO JACKED I CAN'T DIGEST AN EGG?

[ LAUGHTER ] >> RIGHT.

I MEAN -- I DON'T KNOW IF ALCOHOL DOES

THAT. [ LAUGHTER ]

MAYBE YOU DIDN'T NECESSARILY EAT THE EGG?

IF THAT MAKES SENSE? MAYBE YOU --

>> OH MY GOD, THAT DOES MAKE SO MUCH MORE SENSE.

BECAUSE I HATE EGGS. I WOULD NEVER EAT ONE.

>> BUT YOU WOULD PUT ONE -- >> OKAY, HEY, WE DON'T NEED TO

SAY IT. I THINK PROBABLY A GOOD TIME TO

GET OUR ZA? >> I'M SORRY, I'M STILL THINKING

ABOUT -- THAT EGG. HOW DID IT NOT CRACK?

[ LAUGHTER ] >> I WANT TO HEAR SO MUCH MORE

ABOUT MR. SHINTO. >> YEAH, DO YOU HAVE A PICTURE

OF THAT DISK THING? >> YEAH, I'M SURE WE ALL WANT

COURTNEY TO ANSWER SOME QUESTIONS AND MAYBE PUT THAT

BEANIE BACK ON. [ LAUGHTER ]

LET'S WAIT TILL AFTER THE MEETING.

>> YEAH, I MEAN, AFTER PARTY, MY PLACE, I GOT KEG SHOTS,

WHATEVER. MY ROOMMATE IS REALLY COOL BUT

ALL OF HIS WIVES ARE SO ANNOYING.

IT'S CRAZY. >> WHAT IS YOUR LIFE?

[ LAUGHTER ] [ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

The Description of Dry Fridays - SNL