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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Gallavich!

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[glass shatters]


Can't you see I'm working?

I don't got time for this shit.

Come on. Get outta here!

[Faye] Frank!

Maybe when I get back from Puerto Rico,

- we can grab a coffee? - [glass shatters]


So Debbie and I are fucking.

You're gay?

Rich people are crazy.

Fuckin' nuts.

- You wanna fuck? - Fuck yeah.

[Kev] This place is for rent.

We should call the number, check it out.

Kev Ball's Keg Zone.

Keg curls.

I've been to every home in Glencoe looking for you.

Does anyone else know I'm here?


We're having a wedding wedding?

I'ma put a fuckin' bullet in your head.

Don't say I didn't warn you, cocksmoker.

[Lip] I rented that house.

I would love if you would help me

make that house a home.

rock music


Think of all the luck you got

Know that it's not for naught

You were beaming once before

But it's not like that anymore

What is this downside

That you speak of? ♪

What is this feeling

You're so sure of? ♪


Round up the friends you got

Know that they're not for naught

You were willing once before

But it's not like that anymore

What is this downside

That you speak of? ♪

What is this feeling

You're so sure of? ♪

[train rattling loudly]

mellow acoustic music


[grunts softly]

[exhales heavily]


[door squeaks open]



Tami, you up? Coffee's on.



- [Liam] Mickey's the bride? - [Ian] Nope. Groom.

- So you're the bride. - No. Also a groom.

- Who's wearing the white tux? - [Ian] Mickey.

- Take your meds yet? - [Ian] Yes.

[Carl] Gonna be a stressful day.

Got it.

You pickin' those up?


Frank walking you down the aisle?

Grooms, remember?

- [Liam] Is he coming? - God, I hope not.

- [Liam] He's in Glencoe. - Great. I hope he stays there.

Hey. I gotta go out for a bit.

You take your meds yet? It's gonna be a stressful day.

- Yes. First thing. - [Lip] All right.

Hey, we gotta meet at the Bamboo Lotus

at two for photos.

Okay. Got it.

Hey, how much did these tuxes cost?

Um, Mickey rented them at some fancy place downtown.

Where's Mickey getting all the money for this?

Savings, he says.

[scoffs] "Savings"?

- [door bangs] - [women scream]

- [man grunts] - On the floor, motherfuckers!

[gun cocking]

upbeat rock music

I don't really wanna know.

Father Pete marrying you?

Father Pete's Catholic.

But Father Pete's gay.

Lives in the rectory with the organist

with the nipple ring.

Wait. The organist at Saint Sebastian's

got a nipple ring?

She's Episcopalian.

They'll marry anybody.

Yeah, those are nice, right?


- [Mickey] Take your meds? - [Ian] [sighs] Yes.

- Good. - [Ian grunts]

[Carl] Serious?

The fuck out, shithead.

quirky rock music


You get them anything for the wedding?

Yeah. Edible boxers.

Not very imaginative.

I wanna get them something special,

but no money.

You can go in on the boxers with me.

They got a honeymoon car?

What's a honeymoon car?

A car you take to your honeymoon.

[slurps, spits]

Eh, they'll probably just stay

take a bus or something.


- Hey, you might wanna... - Mm-hmm.

- I'm gonna take a deuce. - Yep.


Dress. Dress. Dress.

Dress. Dress.

Dress. Dress.

- Dress. Dress. Dress. - No, sweetie.

Hey, the wedding isn't till this afternoon, okay?

Please, Mommy. Now.

[Sandy] What is she on about?

She wants to wear her flower girl dress again.

Why the hell not? She's only gonna wear it once.

[chuckles] Okay, sweetie.

- Go on. - Yay!

It's hanging on the ironing board in the kitchen.

[squeals playfully] Go.

[Franny babbles softly]

Uh, so...

about last night.


[sirens wailing distantly]


[both chuckle]



We gotta be at the Bamboo

at nine for the flower delivery.

And then the caterers are delivering

the chairs and shit at ten.


You think your uncle's serious about shooting Mickey?

Serious as a heart attack.

But he probably won't do it at the wedding.

Too many witnesses.

- [cell phone dings] - He'll wait


Holy sh-shit.


It's on fire.

What's on fire?

The Bamboo Lotus. It's on fire!

Dude, it's on fucking fire!

Fuck is going on?


[sirens wailing]





[Carl] What the hell's going on?

What is that?

The Bamboo Lotus.


[Carl] The wedding place?

It's on fire.


[fire roaring firefighters yelling]


What do you think?


[Ian] Oh, shit.

[Sandy] Fuck. Mickey!

heavy rock music


[Ian] Mickey!



[bellowing] Terry Milkovich!

- You fuckin' pig fucker! - [Ian] Mickey.

[Sandy] Jesus, Mick!

[Mickey] What the fuck, Sandy?

[Sandy] Give me the fucking gun, Mick.

- [gunshot] - [Ian] Oh, shit.


- Shit! - [Mickey shouts]

- [Mickey] Fuckin'... - [Ian] Get the cuffs.

[Mickey struggling]

[exhales] You done?


- [grunts] - [Ian] No!

You gonna make me hit you again?

- [Mickey groans] - [Ian] Now are you done?


Yeah. Yeah.


Around my fingernails

Come on, Milo.

Push that 60.

There you go.

or whatever the fuck you drink.

Jasper, are you kidding me? Can you go slower?

Full rotations, man!

Do you want your name under Pussy of the Day?

Is that what you want, Jasper?

Is it safe if I park my Tesla out front?

Hell no, it ain't safe, Homer. This is the ghetto, man.

Get in here and grab two kegs and give me 30 curls now.

[Arlo] You Kevin?

[Kev] The fuck do you think?

Lorne sent me.



Way to go, Oscar. Puke is pride.

I wanna join.

Uh, you take Amex?

"Amex." Cash only!

$50 per session up front,

plus another $40 for the T-shirt.

ATM is right there.

[rock music playing over speakers]

You're out of spring water.

I am?

All right. Grab a sledge.

Start working the wall.



Get off the damn phone!

If I see you on that thing one more time,

it's going in the puke barrel.

You hear me, fat boy?


Harder, Milo!

Come on, man. Get it up.

[hammer thudding, wall rattling]

What do you have them doing over there?

Bashin' a hole in the wall to connect the gym to The Alibi.

[Veronica] How long's that gonna take?

Ah, with my pasty propeller-heads

swinging the hammers, twins'll be grandparents first,

but I'm gonna finish the rest myself later.

[grunts softly]

What the hell are you doing?

[Kev] Making natural spring water.

My Keggers love to hydrate.

You don't sterilize the bottles first or anything?

No. Fuck those Facebook assholes.

They need the germs, strengthen their

oat milk-drinking immune systems.

What is oat milk?

The extra watery shit that sits on top

when you make oatmeal.

[Kev] Hey, V, can you get me some more

of those $2 black T-shirts from Walmart

and cut the sleeves off?


I got 20 fully paid Keggers already.

Plus, I'm starting an online thing

where you can do it at home.

I mean, who doesn't have an empty keg

laying around the house, right?

- Oh, yeah. Totally. - Sure.

All right, we need to leave soon, babe,

Those two are really going through with getting married?


Why'd you say it like that?

[Tommy] I don't know.

[Veronica] Don't know what?

Uh, I mean, it just doesn't seem right.

I don't care who sticks what in what,

but now they gotta get married too?

Who's "they"?

Hey, I got no problem with the gays.

I'm just saying that some things

are natural man-woman things.

I don't wanna walk into the men's room

and see a chick in heels

pulling out her penis at the urinal.

She wouldn't be in the men's room, Tommy.

She's a woman.

You look at other men's penises when you're at the urinal?

- That's pretty gay, Tommy. - [Tommy] No!


You collect more Keg cash today

we can use to buy the champagne?

Uh, no. Nothing this morning.

All those waters?

I forgot to refill 'em last night.

[Tommy] Jesus, when did the PC police show up in here?

So a chick in heels peed next to you?

No. It is a hypothetical kind of discussion thing.

I thought you didn't make any money this morning.

Hey, mind your own business, homo hater.

Keeping a little "me" money on the side there, Kev?


- [Kermit clears throat] - [Veronica] Oh, thank God

that banging stopped.

Yeah, Homer's arms must've given out.

All right, I gotta get back

melancholy acoustic music


Hey. Tami and Fred here?

- [Cami] That Lip? - Yeah.

[Cami] You fire him yet?

- What? - [Brad] Not yet.

[Cami] I'm serious, Brad.

Fire the prick.

- Come on, Cami. - Cami.

You're fired, Lip.

She just went out the back.

Thank you.

[door clicks shut]


Hey. Hey.

How's Fred? He sleep all right?


Tami, are we gonna talk about this?

Sure. Yeah.

Let's talk about this.

The same way we talked about that house

before you went and bought it without even asking me.

No, no, I didn't buy it, though.

I'm renting it, right?

And we-we did. I mean, I asked.

And I said no.


[engine rumbling]


Terry burned down the Bamboo?


There's homophobic,

We'll just call everybody,

tell them the wedding is postponed.

What? No!

We can figure this out.

[Ian] We should just elope,

go to the courthouse.

Hell no!

You can't let hate win.

Hate always wins.

Jesus, Gandhi,

Martin Luther King.

and the other two were shot.

[Debbie] We still got the flowers, the booze, the DJ,

and all that other shit, right?

What about here?

What, in the house?

A hundred and twenty,

to get hammered.

- The Alibi? - It's a shithole.

I don't wanna get married where my shoes stick to the floor.


Jesus, this is getting sadder and sadder.

Why don't we just do it

from the poultry processing plant?

How about the park? Hmm?

It's 40 degrees and supposed to snow.

Jesus! You two wanna help, maybe?

Yes, I wanna help.

down my dad's throat

all over his kitchen wall!

that's big enough and can take us in a hurry.

With what money?

We spent it all on the Bamboo and flowers and shit.

So, what,

Watch Paris burn?

Let the Berlin Wall stand?

Saigon fall?


Is that who we are?

- Yes! - [Debbie] No!

We're Gallaghers!

If you're gonna be a part of this family,

you better nut up.

We're gonna white-trash this shit.

sauntering rock music


Hello, Father.

What do you want?

Are you coming to the wedding?

You're getting married?

I'm ten.

Ian. This afternoon.

Oh, yeah? Good for him.

Who's the lucky lady-man?

- Mickey Milkovich. - [scoffs]

As if your brother's gene pool

wasn't challenged enough already.

I don't think their genes could ever get mixed together,

biologically speaking.

- Are you coming or not? - [Frank] Not.

Throw some rice at the happy same-gendered couple for me,

will ya?

[Liam] He's selling the house.

Wh-who's selling what house?

Our house. Lip.

To a couple of yuppie lawyers.

They're bringing the money today.

Two hundred thousand bucks in cash.


Lip is taking his share of the money

and moving to Milwaukee.

What about my share?

Don't think they're planning on cutting you in.

It's my house,

not theirs.

Please! I don't wanna move.

It's the only home I've ever known.

Of course it is, son.

Let me get dressed.

And the keys.

- Keys? - To the Rolls or the Mercedes.

The L could take hours.

The house could be sold before we even get there.

Why the hell not?

funky music


[Debbie] The Gala's all booked up.

[Ian] Same with the Dynasty.

Rodent infestation.

in their parish hall,

whatever the fuck that is.

What's going on?

- He what? - [Ian] To the ground.

- [cell phone dings] - [Lip] Holy shit.

Hey, Navy Pier's got a party boat.

It's, like, 20 grand, though.

Oh, so I kite them a check.

Let the bastards come after me.

What are they gonna give me, 18 months?

- [cell phone dings] - I can do that in my sleep.

Wh-wh--so you guys wanna try to find someplace else

to have the wedding today?

They do; I'm just getting shit-faced drunk.

Why is Mickey handcuffed?

Hey, what about that boarded-up Ukrainian church

over on Cermak?

No. Roof caved in last winter.

[Veronica] What happened?

Yeah. Dad, a fire, and no wedding.

No, no! Look, it is over.

It is over and done.

Terry fuckin' wins again, like he always does.

Jesus Christ.

Do you remember when we were kids?

As soon as we got home, who took all the candy?

Your dad.

[Mickey] Before my mom ran out,

who opened everything up, took what he wanted,

and pawned the rest?

[Sandy] Your dad.

[Mickey] Who-who handed us over

to Family Services for a year

so he could run drugs for the Sinaloa cartel?

Your dad.

Look, I love you.

I love you.

He needs to die--today.

What about the Polish Doll?

Ey, asshole, were you not listening?

We're doing a murder thing here.

Old man Wójcik died,

but his wife's running it now, I think.

Is that that 500-year-old bag

that drives around in that orange convertible?

Yeah, the one with the short, short skirts

and the poufy red hair.

The Polish Doll's never been known for being gay-friendly.

They keep a Louisville Slugger behind the bar

called the "Fag Fixer."

All right, so we don't tell them.

You don't think they'll notice?

Not until there's a hundred drunk wedding guests

jammed into the place.

They're not answering.

- [Lip] Let's go. - You guys, keep dialing.

There's gotta be someplace else we can use.


So we'll say that you're the bride.

Can you, uh, cry

- Totally. - Okay.


[Debbie] What the hell do you want?

Uh, my mom kicked me out of the house,

which is your fault, so here I am.

[Sandy] So the Polish Doll finally picked up.

They're there right now.

Who the fuck is this?


[Sandy chuckles]

This is Julia?

You said she was young, but...

Debs, we gotta go!

Look, you can't stay here.

Too bad. I am.

- [Lip] Debbie! - Go home, Julia!

[chuckles softly] Who are you?

I'm Sandy...

her girlfriend.

She's been sleeping with you too?

Shit, I gotta find a clinic,

get swabbed for gonorrhea.

[car horn honks distantly]





Welcome to the South Side...

[overpronouncing] ...Julia.

quirky rock music


You want it, you got it

Do what you do

You want it, you got it

Do what you do

You unbelievable

It's undeniable

They find someplace we can use yet?

No. I'm texting Tami again.

She's leaving me unread.

[exhales] Hey, you, uh-you need me to do something,

you know, to help you cry?

- Like what? - I don't know.

Pinch you or slap you or something.

Frank and Monica were my parents.

I can remember anything from my childhood,

and...I can cry.


Right. Yeah, no. Okay.

That's good. Come on.

[jaunty polka playing on accordion]


[emphatically] Jesus.


[bartender] You lost?

Hi. No.

Um, my sister was supposed to get married this afternoon,

but the hall burned down.

So we are desperate to find someplace

to hold the ceremony.

Gotta talk to the boss.

Over here? Okay.

Mrs. Wójcik?

- That's me, honey. - Hi.

Yeah, we have an emergency situation,

and you may be the only person in Chicago

who can make it right.


[mouths word]


Yo! We got it!

- [Ian] What? - [Sandy] No.

There is a seniors' happy hour at 4:30.

So the DJ's gotta play some polka,

and I had to guarantee

we'd spend at least 300 bucks at the bar.

Oh, and, uh,

Mickey might have to marry Debbie instead of Ian.

- [Veronica] What? - [Ian] What?

Yeah, it's definitely not Gay Pride Day over there.

So we told Wójcik that Debbie was the bride

and she was gonna marry a nice Polish boy named Michael.

- [Veronica laughs] - Yeah.

V, I need a wedding dress in a hurry.

Do you know anyone who's got one laying around?

Closet Diva rents wedding dresses.

- Cool. - Kev, come on, man.

We gotta get these flowers, chairs,

- Can we use your truck? - Yeah, no problem.

- [Lip] Thanks. - Carl! Lend a hand.

- Hell yeah. - [Lip] Thanks, bud.

- Wait. Wait. - [Lip] What?

- Mickey's marrying Debbie? - Yeah. Don't worry.

I'll figure out something to do with the old bat

shit goes sideways, Mickey marries Debbie;

we have a big fuckin' party anyway.

Good. Okay. So uncuff Mickey.

Get your clothes. We only got a couple hours.

Let's fuckin' go!

- Julia's still here? - Uh-huh.

Asked how many days a week the maid comes.


percussive rock music


[Frank] They're moving already?


You bastards cannot sell this house!

It's mine!

- Lip! - [Lip] Hey, Frank.

Lip, you cannot sell this house

without giving me my share.

- [Lip] What the fuck? - This is my house, not yours.

I want half! Uh, I want more than half!

Nobody's selling the house, Frank!


You're not?



You lied?

Learned at the foot of the master.

Looks like you might've gotten punked, punk.

- Lip. - Yeah?

Just need shaving cream,

string, and a couple of old cans.

Is that a Mercedes?



You got game, son.

See ya.

Children want their parents at their weddings.

You'll probably not be alive for mine.

We don't ask much of you.

Least you can do is bother to show up when we get married.


Nice try, kid.

[footsteps receding]

[footsteps approaching]


Took the keys to the Mercedes, didn't you?

You gonna give 'em back to me?

Not until after the wedding.

You can't stay here, Julia!

I'm taking half the drawers. I put your crap over there.

We need to go buy a bunch of shit

before my mom cancels my Amex.

What happened to your face?

Your skanky side piece coldcocked me.



She in on it too?

- In on what? - Your hustle.

Now, how much were you able to milk my mom for?

Ten grand? Twenty?

I didn't hustle your mom.

I liked her. She was good to me.

I'm glad she was good to somebody.


What do you think?

For what?

The wedding. I'm coming.

No, you're not, Julia!

Ghetto wedding? Wouldn't miss it.

Gonna light up my Instagram likes.

- [cell phone ringing] - Oh, look.

There's Mommy Dearest now.

All is forgiven, I bet.

[sighs] Hi, Mom.



No, I'm not coming home.


No. Apology not accepted.

Yes, I'm serious.

I'm at Debbie's.

[Claudia yelling indistinctly]


Her tongue is two inches deep into my vagina right now--

No, no! No, it isn't, Claudia.


- Oh, that feels so good! - God damn it.

- She's lying! - Ah, gotta go.

Fuck you, Mom!

[shouting] What the hell is wrong with you?

Which side of the bed do you want?

I prefer the right.

You want kids?

Hell no.

With your mental problems

You end up marrying Debbie, could knock out a couple.

We could raise 'em together.

You want me banging your little sister?

Yeah, probably be too weird.

Yeah, you think?

I wouldn't mind a kid or two, though.

Well, there's plenty of strays

wandering around the neighborhood.


You're an ugly motherfucker.

Yeah, well, at least I don't have to hide in a coffin

till the sun goes down.


You ready to do this, Milkovich?

Damn straight, Gallagher.

[dance music playing over speakers]

- [Kev] Phillip! - [Lip] Hey!

I got a bunch of these candle things.

- Where do you want 'em? - Uh, yeah.

maybe some on the bar too.

- [Veronica] Hey. - [Lip] Hey.

Got a dress. Where's Debbie?

The bride is in the kitchen.

Babe, clothes.

Where do you want this cake?

Thank you.

- [Mickey] Jesus. - Hey.

This place is a shithole.

- And not in a good way - No, no, no, no.

It's gonna look a lot better when we turn off the overheads

and light some of the candles; be good.

Yeah, sure, long as our guests are also blind.

Which one of you is the groom?

Ah, Mrs. Wójcik.

Uh, this is the groom, uh,

Michael Milkovich,

and, uh, his best man, Ian Gallagher.

speaking Polish

Uh, it's nice to meet you too.

I don't speak that Polish shit--

Ah, nice to meet you. It is such a pleasure.

- We're charmed. - Hey, hey.

Guests are arriving.

Okay. Pleasure.

Hey, what's up, queens?

Hey, uh, Mrs. Wójcik,

See, my sister, she's freaking out.

I think she's having second thoughts.

- About getting married? - Yeah.

You know, it's been a really emotional day,

you know, with the fire, and...

our mother is no longer alive.

Do you think you could talk to her?

You know, I think a-a few words from you

could really make the difference.

Where is she?

Thank you so much.

[man] Where's the rest of the chairs?

Chiavari chairs look nice.


Like how the gold catches the light.

gentle acoustic music


[Liam] Yeah. Park right here.

[Frank] The wedding's at the Polish Doll?

Yeah, no, this is not gonna work.

[car door slams]

- You coming? - Sorry.

No can do, my friend.

The chick that owns this place hates me.

Tried to stab me more than once.

What'd you do to her?

Many, many things. All consensual.

Although we were both often inebriated.

It was great fun until her husband, Rudy,

returned unexpectedly from his mother's funeral

in the old country, and then...

How long ago was this?

Years. Decades, actually.


She probably won't even remember.

- [sighs] - [Liam] Come on.

[car door slams]

She'll remember, all right.

Ugh. My God. I look like a snow cone.

How do I sit down in this thing?

You don't.

- [exhales] - Oh, my goodness.

My little Debbie's getting married.

- [chuckles] - [footsteps approaching]

- [Sandy] Here she comes. - How much time do we need?

Forty-five minutes.

- [Debbie] Got it. - Yeah? Okay.

Better hydrate.

[exhales deeply]

[Lip] Debbie?


[wailing] Go away, Phillip!

Oh, please come out. The guests are arriving.

- So come on. - No! No!

- [sobs] No! I can't do it. - Oh!

- speaking Polish - [Debbie] I can't. No!

[Mrs. Wójcik] I know. I know it's scary.

No bride should have to go through this

without their mother.

It's so scary.

You see her?

What does she look like?

Big hair. Big tits.


No. Maybe she's not here.

If she is, I'm gonna hold you in front of me

as a human shield.

Woman is quick with a blade.


Hey, Kev. Kev. Guard that door.

That polka lady tries to come out of the kitchen,

don't let her.

"Don't let her" how?

I don't know. Tackle her. Punch her.

I don't give a shit.

- You gonna sit, sweetheart? - I can't.

I gotta punch an old lady.

[romantic music playing over speakers]

Those the Gay Jesus groupies?

Oh, yeah. Ian said they might be coming.

- Hey, man. What's up? - Hey, Geneva.

[Geneva] All right. Rainbow Squad, take the back.

The rest of you, with me out front.

Let's go.

See ya.

Jesus. Debbie know you're coming?

She got down on her hands and knees and begged me.

Where is she?

[man] What's this shit?

- What the fuck? - [tires squealing]

What's this asshole up to?

[engine revving]

The hell you doing, Jamie?

You little shit!

rock music


Jamie, you come back here!

- No! - You little shit!

[Jamie grunts]

- What were you doing, asshole? - Come on, Uncle Terry.

- What? - Let me go, m--[grunts]

What were you telling that car?

[Jamie] Sandy.

- [shouts] - What about Sandy?

where we moved Mick's wedding 'cause of the fire.

Where? Where'd they move it to?

That-that polka place.

Th-the-the Polish Doll.

[acoustic pop music playing over speakers]

And you just look so beautiful

It's like you were an angel

Can I stop the flow of time? ♪

Can I swim in your divine... ♪

- [exhales] - Hey. She came.

- What? Who did? - Tami.

Uh, that was in question?

Eh. Could've gone either way.

What'd you do this time?

Fuck off. [chuckles]

You ready?

[Ian] Yeah. [clears throat]

[romantic music playing over speakers]


You choose this shit?


- You soft motherfucker. - You know it.

- [Lip] I love you. - [Ian] I love you too, man.

- ♪ At last ♪ - You good?


My love has come along


My lonely days

Are over


And life is like a song


Oh, yeah, yeah

At last


The skies above are blue


My heart

Was wrapped up in clover


The night I looked at you


[Reverend Sally] Dearly beloved,

we have gathered here today to witness and bless

the joining together of these two men

in holy matrimony.

Ian, will you take this man to be your husband?

Will you love him...

Mickey's not marrying that ginger fuck today.

[Gay Jesus disciples] ♪ We shall overcome

- [Terry] Oh, what the hell? - ♪ Someday

- Fuckin' hippie homos. - [man] Jesus.

- Look at all these lesbos. - ♪ We are not afraid

[Terry] And fairies.

Kumbaya, bitch!

We are not afraid

We are not afraid today

[disciples gasp]

We are not afraid

- ♪ Today ♪ - Go!

[man] What do you want me to do?

Drive, fuckhead! I can't shoot 'em all.

We'll walk hand in hand

We'll walk hand in hand


- [exhales happily] - [man] Amen!

- [woman] Love wins! - [man] Yeah!

I, Mikhailo, take you, Ian,

to be my husband,

to have and to hold

from this day forward,

for better or worse,

for richer, for poorer...

Mornin' flowers, they swayed... ♪

[Mickey] sickness and in health...

♪ ...early breeze... ♪ love and to cherish you...

till death do us part.

I, Ian,

take you, Mickey,

to be my husband...

Don't be long... ♪ have and to hold you from this day forward,

for better or for worse,

richer or poorer...

Sick of hurrying... ♪ sickness and in health.

And I know they're wrong love and to cherish you

till death do us part.

[Reverend Sally] Now that Mikhailo and Ian

have given themselves to each other,

with these vows

and the giving and receiving of rings,

I now pronounce you...

husband and husband.

- Now? - [Reverend Sally] Yes, now.

- [cheers and applause] - ♪ Mornin' flowers

Tell you many secrets

In those early hours

See you tomorrow

My mornin' flowers


[cheers and applause continue]


I'm still here, still bringin' it to ya

Ohm, like Buddha

Good girls know how to get hard too, yeah

I'm all done up in my Sunday best

No walk of shame, 'cause I love this dress

Hungover, heart of gold, Holy mess

Doin' my best

- Oh, okay. - [muffled cheers and music]

Hey, I gotta go now.

You're ready for the wedding now?

The wedding? Oh, I think we missed it.


[dance music playing over speakers]


Crazy... ♪

[Zuzanna] Wh-what the hell's going on?

Well, that-that homo married that other homo.


Selling lots of booze, though.

If it were a joke

I'm afraid that

We finally broke

It's true

Why can't you unwind? ♪

I do... ♪

[pleasantly] Hey.

Zuzzy, how you been?

Don't you fuckin' "Zuzzy" me, Gallagher!


[both chuckle]

[both moaning]

It's coming apart


It's coming apart... ♪

- [Carl] What's up, buddy? - [Liam] Frank.


You look underaged and thirsty.



If you're thinking about jumping Sandy, I wouldn't.

She did time for assault.

Juvie, but the guy's still slurping meals

through a straw.

Um, I'm not gay.

- You're not? - No.

Just experimented a bit, but it's not really my thing.

So what is your thing?

Toys and porn.

I like toys.



Let's play.

It's coming apart


It's coming apart


[Kev] I mean, sometimes I wish I was gay, you know.

Sure, yeah.

[Kev] Marry your best friend.

Blow jobs. Make each other sandwiches--

[Veronica] Kevin!

- Thank you for inviting me. - Thank you for coming.

- It was so beautiful. - Appreciate that.

And you. Congratulations.

I love you guys.

With somebody who loves me

Be right back.


I've been in love and lost my senses

Spinning through the town... ♪

Why are you hiding that money?

The fever ends

And I wind up feeling down... ♪

What money?

The money you're hiding under the bar.

I love this song. Let's dance.

- You wanna dance? - $800?

We promised never to keep secrets from each other, Kevin.

- Why? - Why what?

Why did we promise not to keep secrets from each other?

Because not all secrets are bad.

Some secrets are good.

You've been acting so strange.

Is this-is this more of your midlife crisis?


Are you seeing someone?

Another woman? Having an affair?

No. Of course not.

Then what? Why the money?

[sighs] I-it's gone, okay? I spent it all.

On what?

Oh, my God!

Snoopy Mary!

Way to ruin a surprise!


I wanted to give you with, like, you know, romantic music,

I don't know, candles, maybe a little wine.

Oh, my gosh.

Cost me more than what I had,

but I figured, with Keg Zone, I'd make enough

and I could pay the rest off later.

You like it?

♪ ...somebody who... ♪

Ask me.

♪ hold me in his arms... ♪

Ask me, fool!

- Veronica Fisher, w-- - On your knees.


♪ that burns hot enough to last... ♪

Veronica Fisher,

will you marry me?

I mean, I gotta find my ex and get a divorce--


- [chuckles] - Yes, yes, yes, yes!


I wanna feel the heat with somebody

[muffled music]




[softly] Hi.

[Fred coos]

Thanks for coming.

I love Ian.

[Lip] Yeah, it was a-it was a beautiful ceremony, huh?

Will you just...

come look inside the house with me?

You know, it's got-it's got two beds,

bath, big backyard.

I don't need to look inside.

Well, I'm not moving to Milwaukee.

I told you that.

So don't.

Wh-wh-what does that mean?

Fred and I are going.

If you don't wanna come with us,

you don't have to.

You're gonna take Fred?

It's a two-hour train ride.

Come and visit us

whenever you can tear yourself away from your family.

Tami, c-c-c-can't we talk about this or something?

No. No, Lip, because I don't want

your life, okay?

I wanted us to create a life together.

- That's-that's... - Yeah. A life for you...

...that's what I want too!

...and me and Fred, and then you just went out

and did whatever the fuck you wanted to

- without thinking about us. - I was thinking about you.

- That's all I was doing. - How am I ever supposed

- No, I can't, okay? - Hey, you're not taking Fred!


I'm his mother.

I've got a house and a job.


really wanna take this to court?

You fucking serious?

Y-you're gonna take Fred

to punish me for not wanting to move?

No, Lip, I'm not punishing you!

- Get the fuck outta here! - Jesus!

We're supposed to be in a relationship!

That means that we make important decisions together.

All right! You want me to move to fucking Milwaukee?

I'll move to Milwaukee, all right?

I'll hate it, but if that's what Tami wants...

You know what? You're an asshole.

You're an asshole.

- I'm an asshole? - Fuck you!

No! Our kid, Lip. He is our kid!

[Fred crying]


[crying continues]

Come here.

It's okay.


[crying continues]

- [shushing] - [Lip murmuring]

I'm so sorry.

[both murmuring soothingly]


Don't do this, please.

Let's just stop lying to each other.


You love your fucked-up family

more than you're ever gonna love me.

That's not true.

That's not true.

Yeah, it is.


You should get back inside there.

Sounds like you're missing a fun time.

- Oh, I got--I can help. - I got it.


[soothingly] Hey. Hey.

I got you.

All right.

It's always been inside of you, you, you

And now it's time to let it through

♪ 'Cause, baby, you're a firework

Come on, show 'em what you're worth

Make 'em go ah, ah, ah

As you shoot across the sky-y-y

- Nice dress. - ♪ You're a firework

Thank you. [laughs]

Come on, let your colors... ♪

Is that Frank making out with that Polish polka lady?

Make 'em go ah, ah, ah

[Debbie] Yeah. Wow.

♪ ...goin' ah, ah, ah

- ♪ Boom, boom, boom ♪ - I miss Mom.

Even brighter than the moon... ♪


Boom, boom, boom... ♪

Monica would've loved today.

♪ ...moon, moon, moon

[people cheering]

I found a love

For me

I should probably go dance with my husband.

Darlin', just dive right in


Follow my lead

I found a girl

Beautiful and sweet

I never knew you were the someone

Waiting for me

Come on.

♪ 'Cause we were just kids

When we fell in love

Not knowing what it was

I will not give you up

This time

Darling, just kiss me slow

Your heart is all I own

And in your eyes, you're holding... ♪

- Can I get a Coke? - [bartender] Yeah, sure.


Baby, I'm... ♪


You like some rum in that?


Barefoot on the grass


When you said you looked a mess... ♪

[Debbie] Listen up, everyone!

I'm the closest thing to a bride we've got.

- So I'm throwin' the bouquet! - [people cheering]

[Debbie] Line up, single losers!

You look perfect tonight

[woman] Right here! Right here, Deb!


[people cheering]

Well, I found a woman

Stronger than anyone I know... ♪

Can I get another?

- [bartender] Sure. - Thanks.

I'll share her home

I found a love


To carry more than just my secrets

To carry love

To carry children

Of our own

We are still kids, but we're so in love

Fighting against all odds

[cheers and applause]

I know we'll be all right

This time

I don't deserve this

You look perfect



[horn honks]


I'm gonna need that car back eventually.

Are those hickies?


Woman's a wildcat.

It's a myth

about the female libido declining with age.

They get hornier.

I'll keep that in mind.

Zuzanna doesn't hate gays.

It's her husband, Rudy.

Turns out, Rudy's gayer than Liberace.

She found boxes of mano a mano porn

after he died.

The old Polish bastard was a raging gay homophobe.

Aren't all homophobes gay?

Probably so, son.

Probably so.

melancholy music


[doorbell rings]

I need to find a meeting.

Come with me?


Let me grab my coat.


[pounding on door]

What is it?

[pounding on door]

[Carl] Shit. I think it's the cops.

[pounding on door]

[pounding on door]

- What's with all the banging? - Cops, maybe.

Ugh. What did Frank do now?

- Deborah Gallagher? - Uh, no.

We have an arrest warrant for Deborah Gallagher.

No shit. What for?

Statutory rape of a minor. Julia Nicolo?


funky music

We got a runner!


Uh, what's going on?

When's your 18th birthday?

Wow, uh-huh

It's too good, the secret is out, and wow

Uh-huh... ♪

Stop! Police!

So word of mouth and wow


And wow, uh-huh

Listen up 'cause I'll break it down now



- [plaster cracking] - [Tami] Jesus.

Needs some work.


Yeah. No shit.


Two bedrooms?


One bathroom.

Two-car garage.

You got another mask?

hopeful music

Yeah. Absolutely.


Hope my tetanus is up-to-date.

music brightens


No? Oh.

I know you got rights

That's not very hard

You tell me all the time... ♪


[Lip] Whoo!


Writing in the dark

Shouting at the blind

Oh! Wake up, wake up

Why are you not hearin' me? ♪

Wake up, wake up

Why are you not hearin' me? ♪

Oh, oh, oh-oh

You're wasting time

Oh, oh, oh-oh

You're wasting time

[both exhale]

Good morning, Mr. Gallavich.

Good morning, Mr...

- Millagher? - [both laugh]

You hungry?


Not really.


You wanna go again?


[tires screeching]

Ah, shit!

- [Ian] Oh! - [gunfire]

[tires squealing]

[both exhale]

I think your dad might still be a little upset.

I got a head full of dreams you can play with

I got a heart full of love, you can take it

I got it all, I'm not lookin' to trade it

I give it all to you

Hey, hey

Perfect day, perfect day

- [whistling] - ♪ Hey, hey


Hey, hey

Perfect day, perfect day

- [whistling] - ♪ Hey, hey


The Description of Gallavich!