- Hi, I'm Alan Wagner and I'm very proud to announce
that my family will be embarking on an exciting new chapter.
My family has decided to create a CGI animated feature film.
The first ever to be created entirely by a single family.
My family's film asks an age old question.
Have you ever looked at your hands and thought
what are these guys doing when I'm not paying attention?
Well, welcome to HandTales.
I developed this concept with my family,
and I could not be more proud of the achievements
that we have accomplished.
Our film centers on our protagonist, Johnny Hand.
Johnny is shy and a bit of a loner.
In fact, I suspect this character may be based
at least partially on myself.
When Johnny reaches the age of becoming a man,
he sets out on a noble quest to find his left hand.
Yes, just like how in our world,
every boy must find a girl, in the realm of HandTales,
every right hand must find a left hand…
to feel complete and to be in love.
Aiding Johnny on his unbelievable quest is his best friend
Darnello Hand, who you could possibly think of
as the street smarts to Johnny's book smarts.
But no feature film would ever be complete
without a classic super villain, and that's where the evil
Dr. Crandlehands comes in.
You see, Dr. Crandlehands is a left hand
who was never able to find a right hand
who would fall in love with her.
So she has made it her hellbent quest to imprison
all the right hands in the realm, which would be devastating
as, just as in our universe, the right hands are more useful.
Johnny also has a love interest.
I could not possibly be more proud of the strides
my family has taken to create this computer-generated
animated feature. However, my son has done the research
and the results may shock you.
Creating a film of this degree of computer generated
imagery can in fact cost up to hundreds of millions
of dollars. That's why our family is turning... to yours.
Our family has decided to forego Kickstarter
in order to bring our campaign directly to you.
In fact if you log on to WesternUnion.com today,
you can transfer any amount of money you see fit
to the account number below. That money will transfer
directly to my family--no middle man, no questions asked.
Please, help our family help yours.
By bringing you the joy of HandTales.