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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: How to Do the Dishes

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DAVID: WHY DIDN'T YOU COME TO

DAVID: WHY DIDN'T YOU COME TO MY DINNER PARTY LAST NIGHT? NOW

MY DINNER PARTY LAST NIGHT? NOW

MY DINNER PARTY LAST NIGHT? NOW I GOT ALL THESE LEFTOVER DIRTY

I GOT ALL THESE LEFTOVER DIRTY

I GOT ALL THESE LEFTOVER DIRTY DISHES I HAVE TO DO ALL BY

DISHES I HAVE TO DO ALL BY

DISHES I HAVE TO DO ALL BY MYSELF. TONIGHT ON "GOING

MYSELF. TONIGHT ON "GOING

MYSELF. TONIGHT ON "GOING DEEP": HOW TO MAKE NEW

DEEP": HOW TO MAKE NEW

DEEP": HOW TO MAKE NEW FRIENDS...AND HOW TO DO THE

FRIENDS...AND HOW TO DO THE

FRIENDS...AND HOW TO DO THE DISHES.

DISHES.

DISHES. THIS IS A HOW-TO SHOW ABOUT

THIS IS A HOW-TO SHOW ABOUT

THIS IS A HOW-TO SHOW ABOUT THINGS YOU THINK YOU KNOW HOW

THINGS YOU THINK YOU KNOW HOW

THINGS YOU THINK YOU KNOW HOW TO DO, BECAUSE SIMPLE THINGS

TO DO, BECAUSE SIMPLE THINGS

TO DO, BECAUSE SIMPLE THINGS ARE MORE COMPLEX THAN THEY

ARE MORE COMPLEX THAN THEY

ARE MORE COMPLEX THAN THEY SEEM. I'M DAVID REES. LET'S DO

SEEM. I'M DAVID REES. LET'S DO

SEEM. I'M DAVID REES. LET'S DO THIS.

THIS.

THIS. >> ♪ WE'RE GOING DEEP WITH

>> ♪ WE'RE GOING DEEP WITH

>> ♪ WE'RE GOING DEEP WITH DAVID REES

DAVID REES

DAVID REESDAVID: BEHOLD THE PLATONIC

DAVID: BEHOLD THE PLATONIC

DAVID: BEHOLD THE PLATONIC IDEAL OF A DIRTY DISH. WE HAVE

IDEAL OF A DIRTY DISH. WE HAVE

IDEAL OF A DIRTY DISH. WE HAVE OLD EGGS, OLD MEAT, OLD

OLD EGGS, OLD MEAT, OLD

OLD EGGS, OLD MEAT, OLD MISCELLANEOUS GREASE AND OILS,

MISCELLANEOUS GREASE AND OILS,

MISCELLANEOUS GREASE AND OILS, OLD OATMEAL, AND MY FAVORITE,

OLD OATMEAL, AND MY FAVORITE,

OLD OATMEAL, AND MY FAVORITE, OLD CREAMED SPINACH. I DO HAVE

OLD CREAMED SPINACH. I DO HAVE

OLD CREAMED SPINACH. I DO HAVE A DISHWASHER, BUT BECAUSE I

A DISHWASHER, BUT BECAUSE I

A DISHWASHER, BUT BECAUSE I LIVE ALONE, I USE MY DISHWASHER

LIVE ALONE, I USE MY DISHWASHER

LIVE ALONE, I USE MY DISHWASHER TO STORE MY TUPPERWARE AND MY

TO STORE MY TUPPERWARE AND MY

TO STORE MY TUPPERWARE AND MY DOLLS. I WASH DISHES BY HAND.

DOLLS. I WASH DISHES BY HAND.

DOLLS. I WASH DISHES BY HAND. DISHWASHERS AREN'T ENERGY

DISHWASHERS AREN'T ENERGY

DISHWASHERS AREN'T ENERGY EFFICIENT, AND THEY USE

EFFICIENT, AND THEY USE

EFFICIENT, AND THEY USE ELECTRICITY. I WANT TO LEARN

ELECTRICITY. I WANT TO LEARN

ELECTRICITY. I WANT TO LEARN THE BEST POSSIBLE HAND

THE BEST POSSIBLE HAND

THE BEST POSSIBLE HAND DISHWASHING PRACTICES. AND THEN

DISHWASHING PRACTICES. AND THEN

DISHWASHING PRACTICES. AND THEN AT THE END OF THIS EPISODE, I'M

AT THE END OF THIS EPISODE, I'M

AT THE END OF THIS EPISODE, I'M GOING TO GO JOHN HENRY AGAINST

GOING TO GO JOHN HENRY AGAINST

GOING TO GO JOHN HENRY AGAINST MY OWN DISHWASHER, AND WE'RE

MY OWN DISHWASHER, AND WE'RE

MY OWN DISHWASHER, AND WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A MAN VERSUS

GOING TO HAVE A MAN VERSUS

GOING TO HAVE A MAN VERSUS MACHINE DISH WASH-OFF. AND I

MACHINE DISH WASH-OFF. AND I

MACHINE DISH WASH-OFF. AND I BETTER WIN, BECAUSE I HATE

BETTER WIN, BECAUSE I HATE

BETTER WIN, BECAUSE I HATE MACHINES. MMM, LOOK AT THE FOOD

MACHINES. MMM, LOOK AT THE FOOD

MACHINES. MMM, LOOK AT THE FOOD STUCK ON THOSE DISHES. IT

STUCK ON THOSE DISHES. IT

STUCK ON THOSE DISHES. IT DISGUSTS ME, AND YET I CAN'T

DISGUSTS ME, AND YET I CAN'T

DISGUSTS ME, AND YET I CAN'T TURN AWAY. WHY DOES FOOD STICK

TURN AWAY. WHY DOES FOOD STICK

TURN AWAY. WHY DOES FOOD STICK TO DISHES? THIS IS DR. SIMON

TO DISHES? THIS IS DR. SIMON

TO DISHES? THIS IS DR. SIMON BILLINGE, A PROFESSOR OF

BILLINGE, A PROFESSOR OF

BILLINGE, A PROFESSOR OF MATERIAL SCIENCE AT COLUMBIA

MATERIAL SCIENCE AT COLUMBIA

MATERIAL SCIENCE AT COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY. MATERIAL SCIENCE

UNIVERSITY. MATERIAL SCIENCE

UNIVERSITY. MATERIAL SCIENCE COMBINES THE STUDY OF PHYSICS

COMBINES THE STUDY OF PHYSICS

COMBINES THE STUDY OF PHYSICS AND CHEMISTRY, AND I FIGURED

AND CHEMISTRY, AND I FIGURED

AND CHEMISTRY, AND I FIGURED SINCE DISHES ARE MADE OF

SINCE DISHES ARE MADE OF

SINCE DISHES ARE MADE OF PHYSICS AND FOOD IS MADE OF

PHYSICS AND FOOD IS MADE OF

PHYSICS AND FOOD IS MADE OF CHEMISTRY, HE'D BE THE PERFECT

CHEMISTRY, HE'D BE THE PERFECT

CHEMISTRY, HE'D BE THE PERFECT PERSON TO TALK TO. HERE'S WHAT

PERSON TO TALK TO. HERE'S WHAT

PERSON TO TALK TO. HERE'S WHAT I WANT TO KNOW. WHEN I COOK

I WANT TO KNOW. WHEN I COOK

I WANT TO KNOW. WHEN I COOK FOOD, WHY DOES IT STICK, AND

FOOD, WHY DOES IT STICK, AND

FOOD, WHY DOES IT STICK, AND WHY IS IT SO HARD TO GET OFF,

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO GET OFF,

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO GET OFF, AND WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO

AND WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO

AND WHY DOES EVERYTHING HAVE TO BE SO HARD IN THIS LIFE?

BE SO HARD IN THIS LIFE?

BE SO HARD IN THIS LIFE? SIMON: IT'S BONDS, CHEMICAL

SIMON: IT'S BONDS, CHEMICAL

SIMON: IT'S BONDS, CHEMICAL BONDS.

BONDS.

BONDS. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. SIMON: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU

SIMON: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU

SIMON: WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU COOK THE FOOD IS THE ATOMS IN

COOK THE FOOD IS THE ATOMS IN

COOK THE FOOD IS THE ATOMS IN THE FOOD STICK TO THE ATOMS IN

THE FOOD STICK TO THE ATOMS IN

THE FOOD STICK TO THE ATOMS IN THE PAN BECAUSE YOU MAKE THEM

THE PAN BECAUSE YOU MAKE THEM

THE PAN BECAUSE YOU MAKE THEM VERY HOT.

VERY HOT.

VERY HOT. DAVID: WHAT IS IT ABOUT HEATING

DAVID: WHAT IS IT ABOUT HEATING

DAVID: WHAT IS IT ABOUT HEATING FOOD THAT MAKES EVERYTHING

FOOD THAT MAKES EVERYTHING

FOOD THAT MAKES EVERYTHING STICK?

STICK?

STICK? SIMON: BECAUSE THE FOOD STARTS

SIMON: BECAUSE THE FOOD STARTS

SIMON: BECAUSE THE FOOD STARTS SHARING ITS ELECTRONS.

SHARING ITS ELECTRONS.

SHARING ITS ELECTRONS. DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT. SIMON: I'VE GOT MY FOOD

SIMON: I'VE GOT MY FOOD

SIMON: I'VE GOT MY FOOD NUCLEUS, MY FOOD NUCLEUS.

NUCLEUS, MY FOOD NUCLEUS.

NUCLEUS, MY FOOD NUCLEUS. THEY'RE SHARING AN ELECTRON.

THEY'RE SHARING AN ELECTRON.

THEY'RE SHARING AN ELECTRON. DAVID: RIGHT. THIS...

DAVID: RIGHT. THIS...

DAVID: RIGHT. THIS... SIMON: SO ALTHOUGH THIS GUY

SIMON: SO ALTHOUGH THIS GUY

SIMON: SO ALTHOUGH THIS GUY HATES THIS GUY...

HATES THIS GUY...

HATES THIS GUY... DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT. SIMON: THEY BOTH LOVE THE

SIMON: THEY BOTH LOVE THE

SIMON: THEY BOTH LOVE THE ELECTRON...

ELECTRON...

ELECTRON... DAVID: RIGHT. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

DAVID: RIGHT. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.

DAVID: RIGHT. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: I'VE BEEN IN THOSE

DAVID: I'VE BEEN IN THOSE

DAVID: I'VE BEEN IN THOSE SITUATIONS.

SITUATIONS.

SITUATIONS. SIMON: YEAH. NOW, WHAT--WHAT WE

SIMON: YEAH. NOW, WHAT--WHAT WE

SIMON: YEAH. NOW, WHAT--WHAT WE NEED IS HEAT.

NEED IS HEAT.

NEED IS HEAT. [IMITATING BURNER] OK.

[IMITATING BURNER] OK.

[IMITATING BURNER] OK. DAVID: THAT WAS AMAZING.

DAVID: THAT WAS AMAZING.

DAVID: THAT WAS AMAZING. SIMON: THE ELECTRON GETS MORE

SIMON: THE ELECTRON GETS MORE

SIMON: THE ELECTRON GETS MORE AND MORE AGITATED...

AND MORE AGITATED...

AND MORE AGITATED... DAVID: BECAUSE WE'VE ADDED

DAVID: BECAUSE WE'VE ADDED

DAVID: BECAUSE WE'VE ADDED ENERGY?

ENERGY?

ENERGY? SIMON: WE'VE ADDED ENERGY.

SIMON: WE'VE ADDED ENERGY.

SIMON: WE'VE ADDED ENERGY. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. SIMON: IT ESCAPES, AND THEN IT

SIMON: IT ESCAPES, AND THEN IT

SIMON: IT ESCAPES, AND THEN IT LOOKS FOR ANOTHER ATOM. WHAT IT

LOOKS FOR ANOTHER ATOM. WHAT IT

LOOKS FOR ANOTHER ATOM. WHAT IT FINDS IS THE PAN.

FINDS IS THE PAN.

FINDS IS THE PAN. DAVID: OH.

DAVID: OH.

DAVID: OH. SIMON: THE--THE OTHER ELECTRON--

SIMON: THE--THE OTHER ELECTRON--

SIMON: THE--THE OTHER ELECTRON-- DAVID: THIS ELECTRON, THIS

DAVID: THIS ELECTRON, THIS

DAVID: THIS ELECTRON, THIS DIRTY, CHEATING ELECTRON, GETS

DIRTY, CHEATING ELECTRON, GETS

DIRTY, CHEATING ELECTRON, GETS ALL HOT AND BOTHERED, AND GOES

ALL HOT AND BOTHERED, AND GOES

ALL HOT AND BOTHERED, AND GOES OUT AND HAS AN AFFAIR WITH THE

OUT AND HAS AN AFFAIR WITH THE

OUT AND HAS AN AFFAIR WITH THE PAN?

PAN?

PAN? SIMON: TOTALLY.

SIMON: TOTALLY.

SIMON: TOTALLY. DAVID: REALLY?

DAVID: REALLY?

DAVID: REALLY? SIMON: TOTALLY.

SIMON: TOTALLY.

SIMON: TOTALLY. DAVID: THAT'S HOW IT WORKS?

DAVID: THAT'S HOW IT WORKS?

DAVID: THAT'S HOW IT WORKS? SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: OK. WHAT HAVE WE HERE?

DAVID: OK. WHAT HAVE WE HERE?

DAVID: OK. WHAT HAVE WE HERE? SIMON: THIS IS AN EGG FROM A

SIMON: THIS IS AN EGG FROM A

SIMON: THIS IS AN EGG FROM A CHICKEN.

CHICKEN.

CHICKEN. DAVID: CORRECT. DO YOU WANT AN

DAVID: CORRECT. DO YOU WANT AN

DAVID: CORRECT. DO YOU WANT AN APRON? NOT EVERYBODY GETS TO

APRON? NOT EVERYBODY GETS TO

APRON? NOT EVERYBODY GETS TO WEAR ONE OF THESE.

WEAR ONE OF THESE.

WEAR ONE OF THESE. SIMON: WHOO.

SIMON: WHOO.

SIMON: WHOO. DAVID: OK?

DAVID: OK?

DAVID: OK? SIMON: GOT IT.

SIMON: GOT IT.

SIMON: GOT IT. DAVID: SO I NEED YOU TO

DAVID: SO I NEED YOU TO

DAVID: SO I NEED YOU TO UNDERSTAND THIS IS A TREMENDOUS

UNDERSTAND THIS IS A TREMENDOUS

UNDERSTAND THIS IS A TREMENDOUS HONOR, AND I NEED YOU TO BRING

HONOR, AND I NEED YOU TO BRING

HONOR, AND I NEED YOU TO BRING YOUR BEST SELF TO THIS.

YOUR BEST SELF TO THIS.

YOUR BEST SELF TO THIS. SIMON: ALL RIGHT. I FEEL MORE

SIMON: ALL RIGHT. I FEEL MORE

SIMON: ALL RIGHT. I FEEL MORE POWERFUL ALREADY.

POWERFUL ALREADY.

POWERFUL ALREADY. DAVID: THAT'S GOOD, SIMON.

DAVID: THAT'S GOOD, SIMON.

DAVID: THAT'S GOOD, SIMON. THAT'S VERY GOOD.

THAT'S VERY GOOD.

THAT'S VERY GOOD. YOU KNOW HOW SOME POTS AND PANS

YOU KNOW HOW SOME POTS AND PANS

YOU KNOW HOW SOME POTS AND PANS ARE MADE OF COPPER? WELL, SIMON

ARE MADE OF COPPER? WELL, SIMON

ARE MADE OF COPPER? WELL, SIMON TOOK TWO PIECES OF COPPER AND

TOOK TWO PIECES OF COPPER AND

TOOK TWO PIECES OF COPPER AND DIPPED THEM IN EGG WHITES. THEN

DIPPED THEM IN EGG WHITES. THEN

DIPPED THEM IN EGG WHITES. THEN HE PLACED THE PIECES ON TOP OF

HE PLACED THE PIECES ON TOP OF

HE PLACED THE PIECES ON TOP OF EACH OTHER AND PUT THEM ON A

EACH OTHER AND PUT THEM ON A

EACH OTHER AND PUT THEM ON A HOT PLATE.

HOT PLATE.

HOT PLATE. THIS SYMBOLIZES AN EGG BEING

THIS SYMBOLIZES AN EGG BEING

THIS SYMBOLIZES AN EGG BEING COOKED IN A COPPER POT, RIGHT?

COOKED IN A COPPER POT, RIGHT?

COOKED IN A COPPER POT, RIGHT? SIMON: THIS IS CORRECT.

SIMON: THIS IS CORRECT.

SIMON: THIS IS CORRECT. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. SIMON: THERE'S A LOT OF WATER

SIMON: THERE'S A LOT OF WATER

SIMON: THERE'S A LOT OF WATER IN THERE.

IN THERE.

IN THERE. DAVID: IN THE EGG WHITE?

DAVID: IN THE EGG WHITE?

DAVID: IN THE EGG WHITE? SIMON: YEAH. AND WE KIND OF

SIMON: YEAH. AND WE KIND OF

SIMON: YEAH. AND WE KIND OF WANT THE WATER TO COME OUT,

WANT THE WATER TO COME OUT,

WANT THE WATER TO COME OUT, BECAUSE THE WATER GETS IN THE

BECAUSE THE WATER GETS IN THE

BECAUSE THE WATER GETS IN THE WAY, ACTUALLY. A LOT OF TIMES

WAY, ACTUALLY. A LOT OF TIMES

WAY, ACTUALLY. A LOT OF TIMES WHEN YOU COOK, THE WATER WILL

WHEN YOU COOK, THE WATER WILL

WHEN YOU COOK, THE WATER WILL BOIL. IT WILL FORM A LITTLE

BOIL. IT WILL FORM A LITTLE

BOIL. IT WILL FORM A LITTLE VAPOR LAYER IN BETWEEN THE FOOD

VAPOR LAYER IN BETWEEN THE FOOD

VAPOR LAYER IN BETWEEN THE FOOD AND THE PAN.

AND THE PAN.

AND THE PAN. DAVID: THAT WOULD BE GOOD FOR

DAVID: THAT WOULD BE GOOD FOR

DAVID: THAT WOULD BE GOOD FOR ME THEN, BECAUSE THEN THE FOOD

ME THEN, BECAUSE THEN THE FOOD

ME THEN, BECAUSE THEN THE FOOD WOULDN'T STICK TO THE PAN.

WOULDN'T STICK TO THE PAN.

WOULDN'T STICK TO THE PAN. SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: IS THAT REALLY TRUE?

DAVID: IS THAT REALLY TRUE?

DAVID: IS THAT REALLY TRUE? SIMON: YES.

SIMON: YES.

SIMON: YES. DAVID: WHY ISN'T EVERYONE ON

DAVID: WHY ISN'T EVERYONE ON

DAVID: WHY ISN'T EVERYONE ON THE EARTH DOING THAT?

THE EARTH DOING THAT?

THE EARTH DOING THAT? SIMON: BECAUSE YOU LOVE THAT

SIMON: BECAUSE YOU LOVE THAT

SIMON: BECAUSE YOU LOVE THAT DELICIOUS, BROWN SEAR ON THE

DELICIOUS, BROWN SEAR ON THE

DELICIOUS, BROWN SEAR ON THE SURFACE OF YOUR STEAK.

SURFACE OF YOUR STEAK.

SURFACE OF YOUR STEAK. DAVID: I DON'T GIVE A [BEEP]

DAVID: I DON'T GIVE A [BEEP]

DAVID: I DON'T GIVE A [BEEP] ABOUT ANYTHING ABOUT THE ACTUAL

ABOUT ANYTHING ABOUT THE ACTUAL

ABOUT ANYTHING ABOUT THE ACTUAL EXPERIENCE OF EATING FOOD. I

EXPERIENCE OF EATING FOOD. I

EXPERIENCE OF EATING FOOD. I JUST NEED NUTRIENTS IN MY BODY,

JUST NEED NUTRIENTS IN MY BODY,

JUST NEED NUTRIENTS IN MY BODY, AND IF I COULD TAKE NOTHING BUT

AND IF I COULD TAKE NOTHING BUT

AND IF I COULD TAKE NOTHING BUT PILLS, I WOULD DO THAT.

PILLS, I WOULD DO THAT.

PILLS, I WOULD DO THAT. WE WAITED FOR OUR COPPER EGG

WE WAITED FOR OUR COPPER EGG

WE WAITED FOR OUR COPPER EGG SANDWICH TO COOK UP, AND WHEN

SANDWICH TO COOK UP, AND WHEN

SANDWICH TO COOK UP, AND WHEN IT WAS DONE...

IT WAS DONE...

IT WAS DONE... TWO PIECES OF COPPER, AND

TWO PIECES OF COPPER, AND

TWO PIECES OF COPPER, AND THEY'RE STUCK TOGETHER BECAUSE

THEY'RE STUCK TOGETHER BECAUSE

THEY'RE STUCK TOGETHER BECAUSE THE EGG IS ACTING AS A GLUE?

THE EGG IS ACTING AS A GLUE?

THE EGG IS ACTING AS A GLUE? SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: BUT REALLY WHAT'S

DAVID: BUT REALLY WHAT'S

DAVID: BUT REALLY WHAT'S HAPPENING IS THE EGG ELECTRONS

HAPPENING IS THE EGG ELECTRONS

HAPPENING IS THE EGG ELECTRONS ARE JOINED WITH THE COPPER

ARE JOINED WITH THE COPPER

ARE JOINED WITH THE COPPER ATOMS?

ATOMS?

ATOMS? SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: WHEN IT COOLS OFF, WHY

DAVID: WHEN IT COOLS OFF, WHY

DAVID: WHEN IT COOLS OFF, WHY DON'T ALL THE ELECTRONS GO HOME

DON'T ALL THE ELECTRONS GO HOME

DON'T ALL THE ELECTRONS GO HOME TO THEIR PROPER NUCLEUS?

TO THEIR PROPER NUCLEUS?

TO THEIR PROPER NUCLEUS? SIMON: BECAUSE THEY FOUND A

SIMON: BECAUSE THEY FOUND A

SIMON: BECAUSE THEY FOUND A NEW--LIKE YOU SAID, THEY

NEW--LIKE YOU SAID, THEY

NEW--LIKE YOU SAID, THEY HAVE--THEY'RE IN A NEW

HAVE--THEY'RE IN A NEW

HAVE--THEY'RE IN A NEW RELATIONSHIP.

RELATIONSHIP.

RELATIONSHIP. DAVID: AND THEY STAY IN THAT

DAVID: AND THEY STAY IN THAT

DAVID: AND THEY STAY IN THAT RELATIONSHIP EVEN WHEN THE HEAT

RELATIONSHIP EVEN WHEN THE HEAT

RELATIONSHIP EVEN WHEN THE HEAT AND THE ENERGY GOES BACK DOWN

AND THE ENERGY GOES BACK DOWN

AND THE ENERGY GOES BACK DOWN TO NORMAL?

TO NORMAL?

TO NORMAL? SIMON: RIGHT, RIGHT.

SIMON: RIGHT, RIGHT.

SIMON: RIGHT, RIGHT. DAVID: THEY'VE JUST STARTED A

DAVID: THEY'VE JUST STARTED A

DAVID: THEY'VE JUST STARTED A NEW LIFE.

NEW LIFE.

NEW LIFE. SIMON: THEY STARTED A NEW LIFE

SIMON: THEY STARTED A NEW LIFE

SIMON: THEY STARTED A NEW LIFE TOGETHER.

TOGETHER.

TOGETHER. DAVID: THAT'S EFFED UP.

DAVID: THAT'S EFFED UP.

DAVID: THAT'S EFFED UP. BUT ONCE THESE ATOMIC BONDS ARE

BUT ONCE THESE ATOMIC BONDS ARE

BUT ONCE THESE ATOMIC BONDS ARE FORMED, HOW DO YOU BREAK THEM,

FORMED, HOW DO YOU BREAK THEM,

FORMED, HOW DO YOU BREAK THEM, SIMON?

SIMON?

SIMON? SIMON: IF IT'S NOT BURNED ON,

SIMON: IF IT'S NOT BURNED ON,

SIMON: IF IT'S NOT BURNED ON, YOU DID IT AT LOW TEMPERATURE...

YOU DID IT AT LOW TEMPERATURE...

YOU DID IT AT LOW TEMPERATURE... DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT. SIMON: JUST--YOU CAN JUST

SIMON: JUST--YOU CAN JUST

SIMON: JUST--YOU CAN JUST GET--USE WATER, AND THE WATER

GET--USE WATER, AND THE WATER

GET--USE WATER, AND THE WATER MOLECULES WILL WORK THEIR WAY

MOLECULES WILL WORK THEIR WAY

MOLECULES WILL WORK THEIR WAY IN. THEY WON'T MAKE A BOND, BUT

IN. THEY WON'T MAKE A BOND, BUT

IN. THEY WON'T MAKE A BOND, BUT THEY'LL JUST WEAKEN THE BOND,

THEY'LL JUST WEAKEN THE BOND,

THEY'LL JUST WEAKEN THE BOND, AND IT WILL COME OFF. SO THE

AND IT WILL COME OFF. SO THE

AND IT WILL COME OFF. SO THE PROBLEM WITH WATER IS IT HAS A

PROBLEM WITH WATER IS IT HAS A

PROBLEM WITH WATER IS IT HAS A VERY HIGH SURFACE TENSION. SO

VERY HIGH SURFACE TENSION. SO

VERY HIGH SURFACE TENSION. SO THE WATER MOLECULES KIND OF

THE WATER MOLECULES KIND OF

THE WATER MOLECULES KIND OF STICK TO EACH OTHER, AND THAT

STICK TO EACH OTHER, AND THAT

STICK TO EACH OTHER, AND THAT ACTUALLY PREVENTS THE WATER

ACTUALLY PREVENTS THE WATER

ACTUALLY PREVENTS THE WATER MOLECULES FROM BURROWING IN

MOLECULES FROM BURROWING IN

MOLECULES FROM BURROWING IN AND--AND--AND BREAKING UP THOSE

AND--AND--AND BREAKING UP THOSE

AND--AND--AND BREAKING UP THOSE RELATIONSHIPS.

RELATIONSHIPS.

RELATIONSHIPS. DAVID: WHY IS WATER SUCH A

DAVID: WHY IS WATER SUCH A

DAVID: WHY IS WATER SUCH A PIECE OF [BEEP]?

PIECE OF [BEEP]?

PIECE OF [BEEP]? SIMON: SO YOU PUT A LITTLE BIT

SIMON: SO YOU PUT A LITTLE BIT

SIMON: SO YOU PUT A LITTLE BIT OF DETERGENT IN, AND THAT

OF DETERGENT IN, AND THAT

OF DETERGENT IN, AND THAT ACTUALLY LOWERS THE SURFACE

ACTUALLY LOWERS THE SURFACE

ACTUALLY LOWERS THE SURFACE TENSION OF THE WATER, SO IT

TENSION OF THE WATER, SO IT

TENSION OF THE WATER, SO IT ALLOWS THE WATER MOLECULES TO

ALLOWS THE WATER MOLECULES TO

ALLOWS THE WATER MOLECULES TO ACTUALLY GET INTO TIGHT--TIGHT

ACTUALLY GET INTO TIGHT--TIGHT

ACTUALLY GET INTO TIGHT--TIGHT SPACES.

SPACES.

SPACES. DAVID: IS DETERGENT LIKE

DAVID: IS DETERGENT LIKE

DAVID: IS DETERGENT LIKE LUBRICANT FOR WATER?

LUBRICANT FOR WATER?

LUBRICANT FOR WATER? SIMON: YES.

SIMON: YES.

SIMON: YES. DAVID: BUT IT'S STILL WATER

DAVID: BUT IT'S STILL WATER

DAVID: BUT IT'S STILL WATER THAT DOES THE ACTUAL CLEANING?

THAT DOES THE ACTUAL CLEANING?

THAT DOES THE ACTUAL CLEANING? SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: BECAUSE THE ACTUAL

DAVID: BECAUSE THE ACTUAL

DAVID: BECAUSE THE ACTUAL CLEANING IS BREAKING THESE

CLEANING IS BREAKING THESE

CLEANING IS BREAKING THESE ATOMIC BONDS?

ATOMIC BONDS?

ATOMIC BONDS? SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING

DAVID: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING

DAVID: THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

ABOUT.

ABOUT. THINK OF A DIRTY DISH AS THE

THINK OF A DIRTY DISH AS THE

THINK OF A DIRTY DISH AS THE HOTTEST NIGHTCLUB IN TOWN.

HOTTEST NIGHTCLUB IN TOWN.

HOTTEST NIGHTCLUB IN TOWN. WATER WANTS TO GET IN, BUT HE'S

WATER WANTS TO GET IN, BUT HE'S

WATER WANTS TO GET IN, BUT HE'S A LITTLE TOO CHUBBY, SO SOAP

A LITTLE TOO CHUBBY, SO SOAP

A LITTLE TOO CHUBBY, SO SOAP HELPS EASE HIM THROUGH THE

HELPS EASE HIM THROUGH THE

HELPS EASE HIM THROUGH THE DOORWAY. BUT NEVER FORGET, IT'S

DOORWAY. BUT NEVER FORGET, IT'S

DOORWAY. BUT NEVER FORGET, IT'S WATER UP IN THAT CLUB.

WATER UP IN THAT CLUB.

WATER UP IN THAT CLUB. ADD WATER WHILE COOKING TO

ADD WATER WHILE COOKING TO

ADD WATER WHILE COOKING TO CREATE A VAPOR BARRIER. THIS

CREATE A VAPOR BARRIER. THIS

CREATE A VAPOR BARRIER. THIS WILL MINIMIZE STICKING AND

WILL MINIMIZE STICKING AND

WILL MINIMIZE STICKING AND TASTE.

TASTE.

TASTE. YOU KNOW HOW BRITISH PEOPLE,

YOU KNOW HOW BRITISH PEOPLE,

YOU KNOW HOW BRITISH PEOPLE, ALL THEIR FOOD IS JUST BOILED?

ALL THEIR FOOD IS JUST BOILED?

ALL THEIR FOOD IS JUST BOILED? SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH.

SIMON: YEAH. DAVID: IS THAT BECAUSE YOU HATE

DAVID: IS THAT BECAUSE YOU HATE

DAVID: IS THAT BECAUSE YOU HATE DOING DISHES?

DOING DISHES?

DOING DISHES? SIMON: UM...

SIMON: UM...

SIMON: UM... DAVID: SO YOU JUST ADD WATER TO

DAVID: SO YOU JUST ADD WATER TO

DAVID: SO YOU JUST ADD WATER TO EVERYTHING?

EVERYTHING?

EVERYTHING? SIMON: NO. IT'S JUST BECAUSE WE

SIMON: NO. IT'S JUST BECAUSE WE

SIMON: NO. IT'S JUST BECAUSE WE DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GOOD

DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GOOD

DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GOOD EATING.

EATING.

EATING. DAVID: OH. ALL RIGHT.

DAVID: OH. ALL RIGHT.

DAVID: OH. ALL RIGHT. WHAT ABOUT WHEN STUFF IS SO

WHAT ABOUT WHEN STUFF IS SO

WHAT ABOUT WHEN STUFF IS SO STUCK ON THAT SOAP AND WATER

STUCK ON THAT SOAP AND WATER

STUCK ON THAT SOAP AND WATER CAN'T GET THE JOB DONE? WHAT

CAN'T GET THE JOB DONE? WHAT

CAN'T GET THE JOB DONE? WHAT ABOUT WHEN YOU NEED TO

ABOUT WHEN YOU NEED TO

ABOUT WHEN YOU NEED TO PHYSICALLY SCRAPE? THIS MAN IS

PHYSICALLY SCRAPE? THIS MAN IS

PHYSICALLY SCRAPE? THIS MAN IS O'NEAL TUTSIS, AND HE IS PAID

O'NEAL TUTSIS, AND HE IS PAID

O'NEAL TUTSIS, AND HE IS PAID TO SCRAPE BARNACLES OFF OF

TO SCRAPE BARNACLES OFF OF

TO SCRAPE BARNACLES OFF OF BOATS, BECAUSE BARNACLES SLOW

BOATS, BECAUSE BARNACLES SLOW

BOATS, BECAUSE BARNACLES SLOW DOWN BOATS, AND SLOW BOATS ARE

DOWN BOATS, AND SLOW BOATS ARE

DOWN BOATS, AND SLOW BOATS ARE FOR LOSERS.

FOR LOSERS.

FOR LOSERS. EXHIBIT "A": CRUSTY OATMEAL.

EXHIBIT "A": CRUSTY OATMEAL.

EXHIBIT "A": CRUSTY OATMEAL. I BROUGHT O'NEAL ONE OF MY

I BROUGHT O'NEAL ONE OF MY

I BROUGHT O'NEAL ONE OF MY GUNKED-UP BOWLS. WE BROUGHT IT

GUNKED-UP BOWLS. WE BROUGHT IT

GUNKED-UP BOWLS. WE BROUGHT IT IN THE CARRY-ON LUGGAGE WHEN WE

IN THE CARRY-ON LUGGAGE WHEN WE

IN THE CARRY-ON LUGGAGE WHEN WE FLEW DOWN TO FLORIDA. PEOPLE

FLEW DOWN TO FLORIDA. PEOPLE

FLEW DOWN TO FLORIDA. PEOPLE THOUGHT WE WERE CRAZY, BUT WE

THOUGHT WE WERE CRAZY, BUT WE

THOUGHT WE WERE CRAZY, BUT WE WERE JUST HAVING FUN.

WERE JUST HAVING FUN.

WERE JUST HAVING FUN. EXHIBIT "B": A BOAT COVERED

EXHIBIT "B": A BOAT COVERED

EXHIBIT "B": A BOAT COVERED IN...

IN...

IN... O'NEAL: CRUSTY BARNACLES.

O'NEAL: CRUSTY BARNACLES.

O'NEAL: CRUSTY BARNACLES. DAVID: CRUSTY BARNACLES.

DAVID: CRUSTY BARNACLES.

DAVID: CRUSTY BARNACLES. O'NEAL: OYSTERS, TOO.

O'NEAL: OYSTERS, TOO.

O'NEAL: OYSTERS, TOO. DAVID: OH, REALLY?

DAVID: OH, REALLY?

DAVID: OH, REALLY? O'NEAL: YEAH.

O'NEAL: YEAH.

O'NEAL: YEAH. DAVID: OH, YEAH. THAT'S AN

DAVID: OH, YEAH. THAT'S AN

DAVID: OH, YEAH. THAT'S AN OYSTER.

OYSTER.

OYSTER. O'NEAL: THAT'S AN OYSTER.

O'NEAL: THAT'S AN OYSTER.

O'NEAL: THAT'S AN OYSTER. THAT'S AN OYSTER.

THAT'S AN OYSTER.

THAT'S AN OYSTER. DAVID: HOW WOULD I CLEAN THIS

DAVID: HOW WOULD I CLEAN THIS

DAVID: HOW WOULD I CLEAN THIS USING THESE TECHNIQUES?

USING THESE TECHNIQUES?

USING THESE TECHNIQUES? O'NEAL: YOU PROBABLY WANT TO

O'NEAL: YOU PROBABLY WANT TO

O'NEAL: YOU PROBABLY WANT TO GET IT WET FIRST. WE USUALLY DO

GET IT WET FIRST. WE USUALLY DO

GET IT WET FIRST. WE USUALLY DO THIS UNDERWATER, BUT FOR THE

THIS UNDERWATER, BUT FOR THE

THIS UNDERWATER, BUT FOR THE CIRCUMSTANCE, WE'LL, UH...

CIRCUMSTANCE, WE'LL, UH...

CIRCUMSTANCE, WE'LL, UH... DAVID: HE'S--WHAT HE'S TOO

DAVID: HE'S--WHAT HE'S TOO

DAVID: HE'S--WHAT HE'S TOO POLITE TO SAY IS WE DIDN'T HAVE

POLITE TO SAY IS WE DIDN'T HAVE

POLITE TO SAY IS WE DIDN'T HAVE THE MONEY OR THE INSURANCE

THE MONEY OR THE INSURANCE

THE MONEY OR THE INSURANCE POLICIES, NOR I, THE LICENSE TO

POLICIES, NOR I, THE LICENSE TO

POLICIES, NOR I, THE LICENSE TO ACTUALLY GET IN THE WATER. OK.

ACTUALLY GET IN THE WATER. OK.

ACTUALLY GET IN THE WATER. OK. WHAT DOES THE SOAKING DO?

WHAT DOES THE SOAKING DO?

WHAT DOES THE SOAKING DO? O'NEAL: SOAKING WILL JUST

O'NEAL: SOAKING WILL JUST

O'NEAL: SOAKING WILL JUST SOFTEN UP THE TEXTURE OF THE

SOFTEN UP THE TEXTURE OF THE

SOFTEN UP THE TEXTURE OF THE OATMEAL.

OATMEAL.

OATMEAL. DAVID: STEP NUMBER TWO IS?

DAVID: STEP NUMBER TWO IS?

DAVID: STEP NUMBER TWO IS? O'NEAL: YOU WOULD TAKE A LARGE

O'NEAL: YOU WOULD TAKE A LARGE

O'NEAL: YOU WOULD TAKE A LARGE SCRAPER, RIGHT, AND YOU'D COMB

SCRAPER, RIGHT, AND YOU'D COMB

SCRAPER, RIGHT, AND YOU'D COMB ALONG THE BOAT. YOU DON'T WANT

ALONG THE BOAT. YOU DON'T WANT

ALONG THE BOAT. YOU DON'T WANT TO ANGLE AGAINST THE BOAT AND

TO ANGLE AGAINST THE BOAT AND

TO ANGLE AGAINST THE BOAT AND HURT THE INTEGRITY OF THE--THE

HURT THE INTEGRITY OF THE--THE

HURT THE INTEGRITY OF THE--THE PAINT.

PAINT.

PAINT. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. O'NEAL: YOU KIND OF WANT TO

O'NEAL: YOU KIND OF WANT TO

O'NEAL: YOU KIND OF WANT TO JUST GO AT AN ANGLE.

JUST GO AT AN ANGLE.

JUST GO AT AN ANGLE. DAVID: RIGHT. CAN I TRY THE

DAVID: RIGHT. CAN I TRY THE

DAVID: RIGHT. CAN I TRY THE SCRAPER ON THIS PART OF THE

SCRAPER ON THIS PART OF THE

SCRAPER ON THIS PART OF THE BOAT?

BOAT?

BOAT? O'NEAL: ABSOLUTELY.

O'NEAL: ABSOLUTELY.

O'NEAL: ABSOLUTELY. WONDERFUL.

WONDERFUL.

WONDERFUL. DAVID: OK. I LOVE THAT.

DAVID: OK. I LOVE THAT.

DAVID: OK. I LOVE THAT. O'NEAL: WONDERFUL.

O'NEAL: WONDERFUL.

O'NEAL: WONDERFUL. DAVID: THAT WAS REALLY

DAVID: THAT WAS REALLY

DAVID: THAT WAS REALLY SATISFYING.

SATISFYING.

SATISFYING. O'NEAL: THAT IS--THAT IS

O'NEAL: THAT IS--THAT IS

O'NEAL: THAT IS--THAT IS EXCEPTIONAL. SO NEXT, YOU'D GET

EXCEPTIONAL. SO NEXT, YOU'D GET

EXCEPTIONAL. SO NEXT, YOU'D GET YOUR TYPICAL 5-IN-1.

YOUR TYPICAL 5-IN-1.

YOUR TYPICAL 5-IN-1. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. O'NEAL: YOU CAN GET IT AT ANY

O'NEAL: YOU CAN GET IT AT ANY

O'NEAL: YOU CAN GET IT AT ANY HARDWARE STORE. WHAT YOU'RE

HARDWARE STORE. WHAT YOU'RE

HARDWARE STORE. WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO DO IS YOU CHIP AWAY,

GOING TO DO IS YOU CHIP AWAY,

GOING TO DO IS YOU CHIP AWAY, AND AT SOME TIMES, YOU'RE

AND AT SOME TIMES, YOU'RE

AND AT SOME TIMES, YOU'RE JUST--YOU'RE HITTING THE CENTER

JUST--YOU'RE HITTING THE CENTER

JUST--YOU'RE HITTING THE CENTER OF IT, WHICH KIND OF LOOSENS UP

OF IT, WHICH KIND OF LOOSENS UP

OF IT, WHICH KIND OF LOOSENS UP THE WHOLE STRUCTURE OF THE

THE WHOLE STRUCTURE OF THE

THE WHOLE STRUCTURE OF THE CALCIUM.

CALCIUM.

CALCIUM. DAVID: OH, SO YOU SHOULD AIM

DAVID: OH, SO YOU SHOULD AIM

DAVID: OH, SO YOU SHOULD AIM FOR THE MIDDLE?

FOR THE MIDDLE?

FOR THE MIDDLE? O'NEAL: BECAUSE YOU KIND OF

O'NEAL: BECAUSE YOU KIND OF

O'NEAL: BECAUSE YOU KIND OF BANG IT IN THE CENTER AND

BANG IT IN THE CENTER AND

BANG IT IN THE CENTER AND THEN--AND THEN SWIPE IT.

THEN--AND THEN SWIPE IT.

THEN--AND THEN SWIPE IT. DAVID: LIKE...

DAVID: LIKE...

DAVID: LIKE... O'NEAL: YES.

O'NEAL: YES.

O'NEAL: YES. DAVID: ALL RIGHT. DID YOU SEE

DAVID: ALL RIGHT. DID YOU SEE

DAVID: ALL RIGHT. DID YOU SEE THAT?

THAT?

THAT? O'NEAL: EXACTLY.

O'NEAL: EXACTLY.

O'NEAL: EXACTLY. DAVID: DID YOU SEE THAT?

DAVID: DID YOU SEE THAT?

DAVID: DID YOU SEE THAT? O'NEAL: BRAVISSIMO.

O'NEAL: BRAVISSIMO.

O'NEAL: BRAVISSIMO. DAVID: DID YOU SEE THAT?

DAVID: DID YOU SEE THAT?

DAVID: DID YOU SEE THAT? O'NEAL: HEH HEH HEH!

O'NEAL: HEH HEH HEH!

O'NEAL: HEH HEH HEH! DAVID: THIS IS, LIKE, A WHOLE

DAVID: THIS IS, LIKE, A WHOLE

DAVID: THIS IS, LIKE, A WHOLE OYSTER BAR RIGHT HERE. LOOK AT

OYSTER BAR RIGHT HERE. LOOK AT

OYSTER BAR RIGHT HERE. LOOK AT THIS.

THIS.

THIS. O'NEAL: YEAH. IT MAKES YOU

O'NEAL: YEAH. IT MAKES YOU

O'NEAL: YEAH. IT MAKES YOU THINK TWICE ABOUT EATING THEM.

THINK TWICE ABOUT EATING THEM.

THINK TWICE ABOUT EATING THEM. DAVID: WELL, I DIDN'T NEED TO

DAVID: WELL, I DIDN'T NEED TO

DAVID: WELL, I DIDN'T NEED TO HEAR THAT.

HEAR THAT.

HEAR THAT. O'NEAL: HA HA HA!

O'NEAL: HA HA HA!

O'NEAL: HA HA HA! DAVID: COMING UP: YOU MAY THINK

DAVID: COMING UP: YOU MAY THINK

DAVID: COMING UP: YOU MAY THINK YOU KNOW HOW TO CLEAN YOUR

YOU KNOW HOW TO CLEAN YOUR

YOU KNOW HOW TO CLEAN YOUR DISHES, BUT WE'RE JUST GETTING

DISHES, BUT WE'RE JUST GETTING

DISHES, BUT WE'RE JUST GETTING STARTED. OH, AND YOUR SPONGE

STARTED. OH, AND YOUR SPONGE

STARTED. OH, AND YOUR SPONGE CAN KILL YOU.

CAN KILL YOU.

CAN KILL YOU. WAIT A MINUTE...

WAIT A MINUTE...

WAIT A MINUTE... FRANK: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO DO

FRANK: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO DO

FRANK: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO DO THAT.

THAT.

THAT. IS THAT THE--IS THAT THE

IS THAT THE--IS THAT THE

IS THAT THE--IS THAT THE TO--BIOTOXIN THAT KILLS FISH IS

TO--BIOTOXIN THAT KILLS FISH IS

TO--BIOTOXIN THAT KILLS FISH IS IN MY NOSE NOW?

IN MY NOSE NOW?

IN MY NOSE NOW? SOPHIA: YEAH. EXACTLY.

SOPHIA: YEAH. EXACTLY.

SOPHIA: YEAH. EXACTLY. DAVID: OHH, OK. GREAT.

DAVID: OHH, OK. GREAT.

DAVID: OHH, OK. GREAT. DAVID: I'D LIKE TO SHARE

DAVID: I'D LIKE TO SHARE

DAVID: I'D LIKE TO SHARE SOMETHING DISGUSTING WITH YOU

SOMETHING DISGUSTING WITH YOU

SOMETHING DISGUSTING WITH YOU NOW. DO I HAVE YOUR PERMISSION?

NOW. DO I HAVE YOUR PERMISSION?

NOW. DO I HAVE YOUR PERMISSION? A 2011 STUDY FOUND THAT 86% OF

A 2011 STUDY FOUND THAT 86% OF

A 2011 STUDY FOUND THAT 86% OF KITCHEN SPONGES HAVE MOLD, AND

KITCHEN SPONGES HAVE MOLD, AND

KITCHEN SPONGES HAVE MOLD, AND 77% TESTED POSITIVE FOR

77% TESTED POSITIVE FOR

77% TESTED POSITIVE FOR COLIFORM BACTERIA. SO WHAT'S

COLIFORM BACTERIA. SO WHAT'S

COLIFORM BACTERIA. SO WHAT'S THE SECRET TO A NICE, CLEAN

THE SECRET TO A NICE, CLEAN

THE SECRET TO A NICE, CLEAN SPONGE THAT STAYS CLEAN?

SPONGE THAT STAYS CLEAN?

SPONGE THAT STAYS CLEAN? WELCOME TO TARPON SPRINGS,

WELCOME TO TARPON SPRINGS,

WELCOME TO TARPON SPRINGS, FLORIDA, AN ALL-AMERICAN

FLORIDA, AN ALL-AMERICAN

FLORIDA, AN ALL-AMERICAN COMMUNITY FOUNDED BY GREEK

COMMUNITY FOUNDED BY GREEK

COMMUNITY FOUNDED BY GREEK SPONGE DIVERS. THIS IS SOPHIA

SPONGE DIVERS. THIS IS SOPHIA

SPONGE DIVERS. THIS IS SOPHIA KONSTANTIN, AND SHE RUNS THE

KONSTANTIN, AND SHE RUNS THE

KONSTANTIN, AND SHE RUNS THE NATURAL SPONGE HEADQUARTERS,

NATURAL SPONGE HEADQUARTERS,

NATURAL SPONGE HEADQUARTERS, AND I LOVE HER SCOOTER.

AND I LOVE HER SCOOTER.

AND I LOVE HER SCOOTER. NOW, TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU

NOW, TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU

NOW, TELL ME EVERYTHING YOU KNOW ABOUT SPONGES. GO.

KNOW ABOUT SPONGES. GO.

KNOW ABOUT SPONGES. GO. SOPHIA: A SPONGE IS THE

SOPHIA: A SPONGE IS THE

SOPHIA: A SPONGE IS THE SIMPLEST FORM OF A MULTI-CELLED

SIMPLEST FORM OF A MULTI-CELLED

SIMPLEST FORM OF A MULTI-CELLED ANIMAL. THERE'S A TISSUE THAT

ANIMAL. THERE'S A TISSUE THAT

ANIMAL. THERE'S A TISSUE THAT SURROUNDS THE SPONGE CALLED

SURROUNDS THE SPONGE CALLED

SURROUNDS THE SPONGE CALLED GURRY. A FEW REASONS...

GURRY. A FEW REASONS...

GURRY. A FEW REASONS... DAVID: GURRY?

DAVID: GURRY?

DAVID: GURRY? SOPHIA: GURRY.

SOPHIA: GURRY.

SOPHIA: GURRY. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. SOPHIA: THEY LIKE TO GROW IN

SOPHIA: THEY LIKE TO GROW IN

SOPHIA: THEY LIKE TO GROW IN CALM, CLEAN WATER.

CALM, CLEAN WATER.

CALM, CLEAN WATER. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. SOPHIA: THEY NATURALLY GROW IN

SOPHIA: THEY NATURALLY GROW IN

SOPHIA: THEY NATURALLY GROW IN THE AEGEAN, THE MEDITERRANEAN,

THE AEGEAN, THE MEDITERRANEAN,

THE AEGEAN, THE MEDITERRANEAN, AND THE GULF OF MEXICO. THEY

AND THE GULF OF MEXICO. THEY

AND THE GULF OF MEXICO. THEY HAVE BEEN USED IN HUMAN SOCIETY

HAVE BEEN USED IN HUMAN SOCIETY

HAVE BEEN USED IN HUMAN SOCIETY FOR 2,500 YEARS.

FOR 2,500 YEARS.

FOR 2,500 YEARS. DAVID: SO WE'RE DONE. TURN THE

DAVID: SO WE'RE DONE. TURN THE

DAVID: SO WE'RE DONE. TURN THE BOAT AROUND. GOOD JOB,

BOAT AROUND. GOOD JOB,

BOAT AROUND. GOOD JOB, EVERYBODY. GREEK IMMIGRANTS HAVE

EVERYBODY. GREEK IMMIGRANTS HAVE

EVERYBODY. GREEK IMMIGRANTS HAVE BEEN HARVESTING SPONGES IN

BEEN HARVESTING SPONGES IN

BEEN HARVESTING SPONGES IN FLORIDA FOR MORE THAN A HUNDRED

FLORIDA FOR MORE THAN A HUNDRED

FLORIDA FOR MORE THAN A HUNDRED YEARS. THE MAN YOU'RE LOOKING AT

YEARS. THE MAN YOU'RE LOOKING AT

YEARS. THE MAN YOU'RE LOOKING AT IS FRANK NOTE, A SPONGE DIVER.

IS FRANK NOTE, A SPONGE DIVER.

IS FRANK NOTE, A SPONGE DIVER. OHH. 12 POUNDS? THIS IS SO YOU

OHH. 12 POUNDS? THIS IS SO YOU

OHH. 12 POUNDS? THIS IS SO YOU CAN JUST WALK ALONG THE BOTTOM

CAN JUST WALK ALONG THE BOTTOM

CAN JUST WALK ALONG THE BOTTOM OF THE WATER.

OF THE WATER.

OF THE WATER. FRANK: THAT HELPS.

FRANK: THAT HELPS.

FRANK: THAT HELPS. SOPHIA: AND THEY NATURALLY PUT

SOPHIA: AND THEY NATURALLY PUT

SOPHIA: AND THEY NATURALLY PUT OFF A TOXIN. THEY DON'T WANT

OFF A TOXIN. THEY DON'T WANT

OFF A TOXIN. THEY DON'T WANT FISH AND STUFF LIVING IN THEM.

FISH AND STUFF LIVING IN THEM.

FISH AND STUFF LIVING IN THEM. DAVID: SOPHIA, I'M DONE.

DAVID: SOPHIA, I'M DONE.

DAVID: SOPHIA, I'M DONE. SOPHIA: ALL RIGHT.

SOPHIA: ALL RIGHT.

SOPHIA: ALL RIGHT. DAVID: I DON'T WANT ANY MORE

DAVID: I DON'T WANT ANY MORE

DAVID: I DON'T WANT ANY MORE INFORMATION ABOUT SPONGES.

INFORMATION ABOUT SPONGES.

INFORMATION ABOUT SPONGES. SOPHIA: ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT,

SOPHIA: ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT,

SOPHIA: ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, FINE.

FINE.

FINE. DAVID: LET'S DO IT.

DAVID: LET'S DO IT.

DAVID: LET'S DO IT. FRANK: LET'S DO IT.

FRANK: LET'S DO IT.

FRANK: LET'S DO IT. DAVID: THAT IS OLD SCHOOL.

DAVID: THAT IS OLD SCHOOL.

DAVID: THAT IS OLD SCHOOL. WHOA! WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

WHOA! WHOA, WHOA, WHOA.

WHOA! WHOA, WHOA, WHOA. THE FIRST THING HE DOES IS FIND

THE FIRST THING HE DOES IS FIND

THE FIRST THING HE DOES IS FIND A SPONGE. THEN HE CUTS IT OFF,

A SPONGE. THEN HE CUTS IT OFF,

A SPONGE. THEN HE CUTS IT OFF, BUT HE LEAVES SOMETHING CALLED

BUT HE LEAVES SOMETHING CALLED

BUT HE LEAVES SOMETHING CALLED "THE HOLDFAST" ON THE ROCK OR

"THE HOLDFAST" ON THE ROCK OR

"THE HOLDFAST" ON THE ROCK OR THE CORAL THAT THE SPONGE WAS

THE CORAL THAT THE SPONGE WAS

THE CORAL THAT THE SPONGE WAS ATTACHED TO, AND THIS ALLOWS A

ATTACHED TO, AND THIS ALLOWS A

ATTACHED TO, AND THIS ALLOWS A NEW SPONGE TO GROW IN ITS PLACE.

NEW SPONGE TO GROW IN ITS PLACE.

NEW SPONGE TO GROW IN ITS PLACE. HE GOT ONE. HE GOT ONE. IS THAT

HE GOT ONE. HE GOT ONE. IS THAT

HE GOT ONE. HE GOT ONE. IS THAT WHAT THAT IS?

WHAT THAT IS?

WHAT THAT IS? SOPHIA: YEP. HE GOT A SPONGE.

SOPHIA: YEP. HE GOT A SPONGE.

SOPHIA: YEP. HE GOT A SPONGE. >> WHOO.

>> WHOO.

>> WHOO. DAVID: OHH. FIRST OF ALL, THAT

DAVID: OHH. FIRST OF ALL, THAT

DAVID: OHH. FIRST OF ALL, THAT ONLY TOOK 30 SECONDS. WHAT IS

ONLY TOOK 30 SECONDS. WHAT IS

ONLY TOOK 30 SECONDS. WHAT IS IT?

IT?

IT? FRANK: THIS IS A WOOL SPONGE.

FRANK: THIS IS A WOOL SPONGE.

FRANK: THIS IS A WOOL SPONGE. THIS IS WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE

THIS IS WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE

THIS IS WHAT THEY LOOK LIKE ALIVE. THIS IS THE SKIN.

ALIVE. THIS IS THE SKIN.

ALIVE. THIS IS THE SKIN. DAVID: THAT'S THE GURRY.

DAVID: THAT'S THE GURRY.

DAVID: THAT'S THE GURRY. FRANK: THIS IS, UH--YEAH, THIS

FRANK: THIS IS, UH--YEAH, THIS

FRANK: THIS IS, UH--YEAH, THIS IS THE LIVE MEMBRANE. THIS PIECE

IS THE LIVE MEMBRANE. THIS PIECE

IS THE LIVE MEMBRANE. THIS PIECE WILL DIE, THIS BLACK SKIN, AND

WILL DIE, THIS BLACK SKIN, AND

WILL DIE, THIS BLACK SKIN, AND THE MEATY PART OF IT WILL DECAY.

THE MEATY PART OF IT WILL DECAY.

THE MEATY PART OF IT WILL DECAY. DAVID: AND HOW LONG UNTIL IT'S

DAVID: AND HOW LONG UNTIL IT'S

DAVID: AND HOW LONG UNTIL IT'S NO LONGER ALIVE?

NO LONGER ALIVE?

NO LONGER ALIVE? FRANK: WITHIN TWO DAYS, THAT

FRANK: WITHIN TWO DAYS, THAT

FRANK: WITHIN TWO DAYS, THAT BLACK SKIN WILL BE GONE.

BLACK SKIN WILL BE GONE.

BLACK SKIN WILL BE GONE. DAVID: REALLY? AND IT'LL JUST

DAVID: REALLY? AND IT'LL JUST

DAVID: REALLY? AND IT'LL JUST BE THE EXOSKELETON?

BE THE EXOSKELETON?

BE THE EXOSKELETON? FRANK: YOU'LL BE SEEING

FRANK: YOU'LL BE SEEING

FRANK: YOU'LL BE SEEING THE--THE SKELETAL STRUCTURE,

THE--THE SKELETAL STRUCTURE,

THE--THE SKELETAL STRUCTURE, YEAH. THAT IS THE SPONGE.

YEAH. THAT IS THE SPONGE.

YEAH. THAT IS THE SPONGE. DAVID: RIGHT. I GOT TO SAY IT

DAVID: RIGHT. I GOT TO SAY IT

DAVID: RIGHT. I GOT TO SAY IT DOES NOT LOOK LIKE AN ANIMAL TO

DOES NOT LOOK LIKE AN ANIMAL TO

DOES NOT LOOK LIKE AN ANIMAL TO ME. IT SMELLS LIKE, UH, SEAFOOD.

ME. IT SMELLS LIKE, UH, SEAFOOD.

ME. IT SMELLS LIKE, UH, SEAFOOD. FRANK: DOES IT?

FRANK: DOES IT?

FRANK: DOES IT? DAVID: YEAH.

DAVID: YEAH.

DAVID: YEAH. FRANK: LITTLE BIT.

FRANK: LITTLE BIT.

FRANK: LITTLE BIT. DAVID: LIKE RAW SEA--OOH. WAIT.

DAVID: LIKE RAW SEA--OOH. WAIT.

DAVID: LIKE RAW SEA--OOH. WAIT. FRANK: THEY GOT SPURS ON THEM

FRANK: THEY GOT SPURS ON THEM

FRANK: THEY GOT SPURS ON THEM IS WHAT THEY CALL THAT.

IS WHAT THEY CALL THAT.

IS WHAT THEY CALL THAT. DAVID: WAIT A MINUTE.

DAVID: WAIT A MINUTE.

DAVID: WAIT A MINUTE. FRANK: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO DO

FRANK: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO DO

FRANK: YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO DO THAT.

THAT.

THAT. DAVID: IS THAT THE--IS THAT THE

DAVID: IS THAT THE--IS THAT THE

DAVID: IS THAT THE--IS THAT THE TO--BIOTOXIN THAT SKILLS FISH

TO--BIOTOXIN THAT SKILLS FISH

TO--BIOTOXIN THAT SKILLS FISH IS IN MY NOSE NOW?

IS IN MY NOSE NOW?

IS IN MY NOSE NOW? SOPHIA: YEAH. EXACTLY.

SOPHIA: YEAH. EXACTLY.

SOPHIA: YEAH. EXACTLY. DAVID: OHH, OK. GREAT. YEAH,

DAVID: OHH, OK. GREAT. YEAH,

DAVID: OHH, OK. GREAT. YEAH, WELL, THIS HAS BEEN A GREAT

WELL, THIS HAS BEEN A GREAT

WELL, THIS HAS BEEN A GREAT EPISODE. SEE YOU IN HEAVEN, I

EPISODE. SEE YOU IN HEAVEN, I

EPISODE. SEE YOU IN HEAVEN, I GUESS.

GUESS.

GUESS. AFTER HARVESTING, THE SPONGES

AFTER HARVESTING, THE SPONGES

AFTER HARVESTING, THE SPONGES SIT FOR 3 DAYS WHILE THE GURRY

SIT FOR 3 DAYS WHILE THE GURRY

SIT FOR 3 DAYS WHILE THE GURRY DECOMPOSES. IT SMELLS

DECOMPOSES. IT SMELLS

DECOMPOSES. IT SMELLS DELICIOUS. THEN THEY'RE

DELICIOUS. THEN THEY'RE

DELICIOUS. THEN THEY'RE PRESSURE WASHED.

PRESSURE WASHED.

PRESSURE WASHED. SO THIS IS A...

SO THIS IS A...

SO THIS IS A... SOPHIA: THIS IS A CLEAN SPONGE.

SOPHIA: THIS IS A CLEAN SPONGE.

SOPHIA: THIS IS A CLEAN SPONGE. YOU CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE

YOU CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE

YOU CAN TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A NATURAL SPONGE AND A

BETWEEN A NATURAL SPONGE AND A

BETWEEN A NATURAL SPONGE AND A SYNTHETIC SPONGE JUST BY

SYNTHETIC SPONGE JUST BY

SYNTHETIC SPONGE JUST BY LOOKING AT IT. THE NATURAL

LOOKING AT IT. THE NATURAL

LOOKING AT IT. THE NATURAL SPONGE, THEIR AIRWAYS ARE ALL

SPONGE, THEIR AIRWAYS ARE ALL

SPONGE, THEIR AIRWAYS ARE ALL CONNECTED, ALL THOSE AIRWAYS

CONNECTED, ALL THOSE AIRWAYS

CONNECTED, ALL THOSE AIRWAYS AND CHAMBERS ARE ALL CONNECTED.

AND CHAMBERS ARE ALL CONNECTED.

AND CHAMBERS ARE ALL CONNECTED. SO WHEN YOU SQUEEZE A SPONGE,

SO WHEN YOU SQUEEZE A SPONGE,

SO WHEN YOU SQUEEZE A SPONGE, YOU FLUSH EVERYTHING OUT, SO

YOU FLUSH EVERYTHING OUT, SO

YOU FLUSH EVERYTHING OUT, SO THEREFORE, MOLD AND BACTERIA DO

THEREFORE, MOLD AND BACTERIA DO

THEREFORE, MOLD AND BACTERIA DO NOT--THAT'S NOT AN ISSUE WITH

NOT--THAT'S NOT AN ISSUE WITH

NOT--THAT'S NOT AN ISSUE WITH NATURAL SPONGES. IT'S GOOD TO

NATURAL SPONGES. IT'S GOOD TO

NATURAL SPONGES. IT'S GOOD TO SOAK THEM IN BAKING SODA AND

SOAK THEM IN BAKING SODA AND

SOAK THEM IN BAKING SODA AND WATER.

WATER.

WATER. DAVID: BUT WITH MY KITCHEN

DAVID: BUT WITH MY KITCHEN

DAVID: BUT WITH MY KITCHEN SPONGE, WHEN I SQUEEZE MY

SPONGE, WHEN I SQUEEZE MY

SPONGE, WHEN I SQUEEZE MY KITCHEN SPONGE, STUFF COMES OUT.

KITCHEN SPONGE, STUFF COMES OUT.

KITCHEN SPONGE, STUFF COMES OUT. SOPHIA: YEAH, BUT THERE'S STILL

SOPHIA: YEAH, BUT THERE'S STILL

SOPHIA: YEAH, BUT THERE'S STILL STUFF INSIDE THAT'S ALL...

STUFF INSIDE THAT'S ALL...

STUFF INSIDE THAT'S ALL... DAVID: SO THESE HOLES IN A

DAVID: SO THESE HOLES IN A

DAVID: SO THESE HOLES IN A NATURAL SPONGE GO ALL THE WAY

NATURAL SPONGE GO ALL THE WAY

NATURAL SPONGE GO ALL THE WAY THROUGH?

THROUGH?

THROUGH? SOPHIA: YES.

SOPHIA: YES.

SOPHIA: YES. DAVID: AND YOU'RE SAYING THE

DAVID: AND YOU'RE SAYING THE

DAVID: AND YOU'RE SAYING THE HOLES IN A SYNTHETIC KITCHEN

HOLES IN A SYNTHETIC KITCHEN

HOLES IN A SYNTHETIC KITCHEN SPONGE, THEY'RE KIND OF, LIKE,

SPONGE, THEY'RE KIND OF, LIKE,

SPONGE, THEY'RE KIND OF, LIKE, FAKE HOLES?

FAKE HOLES?

FAKE HOLES? SOPHIA: THEY'RE FAKE HOLES,

SOPHIA: THEY'RE FAKE HOLES,

SOPHIA: THEY'RE FAKE HOLES, YEAH.

YEAH.

YEAH. DAVID: YOU HATE SYNTHETIC

DAVID: YOU HATE SYNTHETIC

DAVID: YOU HATE SYNTHETIC SPONGES?

SPONGES?

SPONGES? SOPHIA: RIGHT.

SOPHIA: RIGHT.

SOPHIA: RIGHT. DAVID: EVERYONE WHO USES

DAVID: EVERYONE WHO USES

DAVID: EVERYONE WHO USES SYNTHETIC SPONGES SHOULD BE

SYNTHETIC SPONGES SHOULD BE

SYNTHETIC SPONGES SHOULD BE ROUNDED UP AND WALKED OFF THE

ROUNDED UP AND WALKED OFF THE

ROUNDED UP AND WALKED OFF THE PLANK.

PLANK.

PLANK. SOPHIA: YEAH. ABSOLUTELY.

SOPHIA: YEAH. ABSOLUTELY.

SOPHIA: YEAH. ABSOLUTELY. DAVID: REMEMBER, SPONGES ARE

DAVID: REMEMBER, SPONGES ARE

DAVID: REMEMBER, SPONGES ARE ANIMALS.

ANIMALS.

ANIMALS. WHO'S A GOOD BOY?

WHO'S A GOOD BOY?

WHO'S A GOOD BOY? SOPHIA: HEH HEH HEH!

SOPHIA: HEH HEH HEH!

SOPHIA: HEH HEH HEH! DAVID: YOU'RE MY LITTLE BUDDY.

DAVID: YOU'RE MY LITTLE BUDDY.

DAVID: YOU'RE MY LITTLE BUDDY. THEY ARE BASICALLY THE HARDEST-

THEY ARE BASICALLY THE HARDEST-

THEY ARE BASICALLY THE HARDEST- WORKING PETS YOU'LL EVER OWN,

WORKING PETS YOU'LL EVER OWN,

WORKING PETS YOU'LL EVER OWN, ALTHOUGH THEY ARE DEAD.

ALTHOUGH THEY ARE DEAD.

ALTHOUGH THEY ARE DEAD. COMING UP, I MEET A WOMAN

COMING UP, I MEET A WOMAN

COMING UP, I MEET A WOMAN TASKED WITH PREVENTING AN ALIEN

TASKED WITH PREVENTING AN ALIEN

TASKED WITH PREVENTING AN ALIEN INVASION OF OUR PLANET.

INVASION OF OUR PLANET.

INVASION OF OUR PLANET. CASSIE: MY JOB IS THE PLANETARY

CASSIE: MY JOB IS THE PLANETARY

CASSIE: MY JOB IS THE PLANETARY PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA.

PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA.

PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA. DAVID: WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A

DAVID: WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A

DAVID: WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?

LIVING?

LIVING? DAVID: I WAS HEADED INTO

DAVID: I WAS HEADED INTO

DAVID: I WAS HEADED INTO DISHWASHING COMBAT AGAINST A

DISHWASHING COMBAT AGAINST A

DISHWASHING COMBAT AGAINST A MACHINE WHOSE SOLE PURPOSE WAS

MACHINE WHOSE SOLE PURPOSE WAS

MACHINE WHOSE SOLE PURPOSE WAS TO WASH DISHES, SO IT WASN'T

TO WASH DISHES, SO IT WASN'T

TO WASH DISHES, SO IT WASN'T ENOUGH FOR ME JUST TO BE

ENOUGH FOR ME JUST TO BE

ENOUGH FOR ME JUST TO BE FASTER. I ALSO WANTED TO BE

FASTER. I ALSO WANTED TO BE

FASTER. I ALSO WANTED TO BE MORE EFFICIENT, USING LESS

MORE EFFICIENT, USING LESS

MORE EFFICIENT, USING LESS WATER AND LESS ENERGY. I WANTED

WATER AND LESS ENERGY. I WANTED

WATER AND LESS ENERGY. I WANTED TO MAKE THAT MACHINE FEEL

TO MAKE THAT MACHINE FEEL

TO MAKE THAT MACHINE FEEL UTTERLY HUMILIATED. THIS IS DR.

UTTERLY HUMILIATED. THIS IS DR.

UTTERLY HUMILIATED. THIS IS DR. RAINER STAMMINGER, OR AS I CALL

RAINER STAMMINGER, OR AS I CALL

RAINER STAMMINGER, OR AS I CALL HIM, "DR. DISHWASHER." HE'S A

HIM, "DR. DISHWASHER." HE'S A

HIM, "DR. DISHWASHER." HE'S A PROFESSOR OF HOUSEHOLD AND

PROFESSOR OF HOUSEHOLD AND

PROFESSOR OF HOUSEHOLD AND APPLIANCE TECHNOLOGY AT THE

APPLIANCE TECHNOLOGY AT THE

APPLIANCE TECHNOLOGY AT THE UNIVERSITY OF BONN IN GERMANY.

UNIVERSITY OF BONN IN GERMANY.

UNIVERSITY OF BONN IN GERMANY. HE SPENT YEARS RESEARCHING HOW

HE SPENT YEARS RESEARCHING HOW

HE SPENT YEARS RESEARCHING HOW TO DO DISHES USING THE LEAST

TO DO DISHES USING THE LEAST

TO DO DISHES USING THE LEAST AMOUNT OF WATER WITH THE BEST

AMOUNT OF WATER WITH THE BEST

AMOUNT OF WATER WITH THE BEST POSSIBLE RESULTS, AND HE'S

POSSIBLE RESULTS, AND HE'S

POSSIBLE RESULTS, AND HE'S WRITTEN MANY, MANY PAPERS ON

WRITTEN MANY, MANY PAPERS ON

WRITTEN MANY, MANY PAPERS ON JUST THAT TOPIC. BASICALLY,

JUST THAT TOPIC. BASICALLY,

JUST THAT TOPIC. BASICALLY, [SPEAKING GERMAN] DISHWASHER.

[SPEAKING GERMAN] DISHWASHER.

[SPEAKING GERMAN] DISHWASHER. HE AGREED TO ANALYZE MY

HE AGREED TO ANALYZE MY

HE AGREED TO ANALYZE MY DISHWASHING TECHNIQUE VIA

DISHWASHING TECHNIQUE VIA

DISHWASHING TECHNIQUE VIA TRANSATLANTIC INTERNET VIDEO

TRANSATLANTIC INTERNET VIDEO

TRANSATLANTIC INTERNET VIDEO CONFERENCE CALL. YOU KNOW THOSE

CONFERENCE CALL. YOU KNOW THOSE

CONFERENCE CALL. YOU KNOW THOSE ALWAYS LOOK AND SOUND PERFECT.

ALWAYS LOOK AND SOUND PERFECT.

ALWAYS LOOK AND SOUND PERFECT. THIS IS MY KITCHEN. THESE ARE

THIS IS MY KITCHEN. THESE ARE

THIS IS MY KITCHEN. THESE ARE MY CAMERA. WAVE HELLO, SAY

MY CAMERA. WAVE HELLO, SAY

MY CAMERA. WAVE HELLO, SAY HELLO.

HELLO.

HELLO. RAINER: HI, FOLKS.

RAINER: HI, FOLKS.

RAINER: HI, FOLKS. DAVID: WAVE HELLO, COREY. OK.

DAVID: WAVE HELLO, COREY. OK.

DAVID: WAVE HELLO, COREY. OK. SO LET ME SHOW YOU HOW I

SO LET ME SHOW YOU HOW I

SO LET ME SHOW YOU HOW I USUALLY WASH DISHES: SPONGE,

USUALLY WASH DISHES: SPONGE,

USUALLY WASH DISHES: SPONGE, SOAP; GET THE SPONGE WET; PUT

SOAP; GET THE SPONGE WET; PUT

SOAP; GET THE SPONGE WET; PUT THE SOAP ON THE SPONGE, AND

THE SOAP ON THE SPONGE, AND

THE SOAP ON THE SPONGE, AND THEN JUST START SCRUBBING; KEEP

THEN JUST START SCRUBBING; KEEP

THEN JUST START SCRUBBING; KEEP RUNNING THE WATER UNTIL

RUNNING THE WATER UNTIL

RUNNING THE WATER UNTIL EVERYTHING'S OFF; RINSE; PUT IN

EVERYTHING'S OFF; RINSE; PUT IN

EVERYTHING'S OFF; RINSE; PUT IN THE RACK. BOOM. WHAT DO YOU

THE RACK. BOOM. WHAT DO YOU

THE RACK. BOOM. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

THINK?

THINK? RAINER: I THINK YOU ARE DOING

RAINER: I THINK YOU ARE DOING

RAINER: I THINK YOU ARE DOING IT AS MOST OF THE AMERICANS ARE

IT AS MOST OF THE AMERICANS ARE

IT AS MOST OF THE AMERICANS ARE DOING IT.

DOING IT.

DOING IT. DAVID: WELL, I'M A PROUD

DAVID: WELL, I'M A PROUD

DAVID: WELL, I'M A PROUD AMERICAN. THAT'S HOW WE WASH

AMERICAN. THAT'S HOW WE WASH

AMERICAN. THAT'S HOW WE WASH DISHES. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?

DISHES. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG?

DISHES. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG? RAINER: YOU'RE USING MUCH TOO

RAINER: YOU'RE USING MUCH TOO

RAINER: YOU'RE USING MUCH TOO MUCH, UH, WATER.

MUCH, UH, WATER.

MUCH, UH, WATER. DAVID: SO WHAT'S THE RIGHT WAY?

DAVID: SO WHAT'S THE RIGHT WAY?

DAVID: SO WHAT'S THE RIGHT WAY? RAINER: TAKE OUT THIS RACK FROM

RAINER: TAKE OUT THIS RACK FROM

RAINER: TAKE OUT THIS RACK FROM THE SECOND SINK. PUT ALL OF THE

THE SECOND SINK. PUT ALL OF THE

THE SECOND SINK. PUT ALL OF THE FOOD--PUT IT IN THE WASTE BIN.

FOOD--PUT IT IN THE WASTE BIN.

FOOD--PUT IT IN THE WASTE BIN. DAVID: EVERYTHING INTO THE

DAVID: EVERYTHING INTO THE

DAVID: EVERYTHING INTO THE GARBAGE?

GARBAGE?

GARBAGE? RAINER: EVERYTHING INTO THE

RAINER: EVERYTHING INTO THE

RAINER: EVERYTHING INTO THE GARBAGE. IN THE LEFT SLOT, PUT

GARBAGE. IN THE LEFT SLOT, PUT

GARBAGE. IN THE LEFT SLOT, PUT IN HOT WATER, ONLY HALF-FULL.

IN HOT WATER, ONLY HALF-FULL.

IN HOT WATER, ONLY HALF-FULL. DAVID: THE SOAP, HOW MUCH?

DAVID: THE SOAP, HOW MUCH?

DAVID: THE SOAP, HOW MUCH? RAINER: NOT TOO MUCH. IN THE

RAINER: NOT TOO MUCH. IN THE

RAINER: NOT TOO MUCH. IN THE RIGHT SINK, PUT IN COLD WATER.

RIGHT SINK, PUT IN COLD WATER.

RIGHT SINK, PUT IN COLD WATER. DAVID: AFTER THE SINKS WERE

DAVID: AFTER THE SINKS WERE

DAVID: AFTER THE SINKS WERE READY, DR. DISHWASHER TOLD ME

READY, DR. DISHWASHER TOLD ME

READY, DR. DISHWASHER TOLD ME TO COMMENCE WASHING. I STARTED

TO COMMENCE WASHING. I STARTED

TO COMMENCE WASHING. I STARTED WITH THE CLEANEST ITEMS,

WITH THE CLEANEST ITEMS,

WITH THE CLEANEST ITEMS, WORKING MY WAY UP TO THE MORE

WORKING MY WAY UP TO THE MORE

WORKING MY WAY UP TO THE MORE DISGUSTING ONES.

DISGUSTING ONES.

DISGUSTING ONES. WHY DO I RINSE WITH COLD WATER

WHY DO I RINSE WITH COLD WATER

WHY DO I RINSE WITH COLD WATER AND NOT HOT WATER?

AND NOT HOT WATER?

AND NOT HOT WATER? RAINER: HOT WATER NEEDS ENERGY,

RAINER: HOT WATER NEEDS ENERGY,

RAINER: HOT WATER NEEDS ENERGY, AND COLD WATER IS SUFFICIENT,

AND COLD WATER IS SUFFICIENT,

AND COLD WATER IS SUFFICIENT, SO YOU DON'T NEED TO ADD HOT

SO YOU DON'T NEED TO ADD HOT

SO YOU DON'T NEED TO ADD HOT WATER THERE.

WATER THERE.

WATER THERE. DAVID: COLD WATER'S JUST MORE

DAVID: COLD WATER'S JUST MORE

DAVID: COLD WATER'S JUST MORE ENERGY EFFICIENT?

ENERGY EFFICIENT?

ENERGY EFFICIENT? RAINER: YEP.

RAINER: YEP.

RAINER: YEP. DAVID: AND WHEN DO I KNOW WHEN

DAVID: AND WHEN DO I KNOW WHEN

DAVID: AND WHEN DO I KNOW WHEN TO ADD MORE DETERGENT?

TO ADD MORE DETERGENT?

TO ADD MORE DETERGENT? RAINER: WHEN YOU SEE THAT THERE

RAINER: WHEN YOU SEE THAT THERE

RAINER: WHEN YOU SEE THAT THERE ARE NO SMALL FOAM BUBBLES.

ARE NO SMALL FOAM BUBBLES.

ARE NO SMALL FOAM BUBBLES. DAVID: SO WHEN I SEE BUBBLES,

DAVID: SO WHEN I SEE BUBBLES,

DAVID: SO WHEN I SEE BUBBLES, I'M STILL GOOD? IT'S OK?

I'M STILL GOOD? IT'S OK?

I'M STILL GOOD? IT'S OK? RAINER: YES.

RAINER: YES.

RAINER: YES. DAVID: LOOKS GOOD. THIS IS

DAVID: LOOKS GOOD. THIS IS

DAVID: LOOKS GOOD. THIS IS GETTING PRETTY...EH.

GETTING PRETTY...EH.

GETTING PRETTY...EH. RAINER: IT MAY BE TIME TO CHANGE

RAINER: IT MAY BE TIME TO CHANGE

RAINER: IT MAY BE TIME TO CHANGE CHANGE THIS WATER.

CHANGE THIS WATER.

CHANGE THIS WATER. DAVID: SO NOW I'M--I'M GOING TO

DAVID: SO NOW I'M--I'M GOING TO

DAVID: SO NOW I'M--I'M GOING TO DRAIN IT. SO AMERICANS NEED TO

DRAIN IT. SO AMERICANS NEED TO

DRAIN IT. SO AMERICANS NEED TO GET OVER THIS IDEA THAT THE

GET OVER THIS IDEA THAT THE

GET OVER THIS IDEA THAT THE ONLY WAY TO CLEAN SOMETHING IS

ONLY WAY TO CLEAN SOMETHING IS

ONLY WAY TO CLEAN SOMETHING IS TO RUN WATER OVER IT? IT'S OK

TO RUN WATER OVER IT? IT'S OK

TO RUN WATER OVER IT? IT'S OK TO PUT IT IN THE WATER, AND

TO PUT IT IN THE WATER, AND

TO PUT IT IN THE WATER, AND THEN SCRUB IT, AND THEN RINSE

THEN SCRUB IT, AND THEN RINSE

THEN SCRUB IT, AND THEN RINSE IT?

IT?

IT? RAINER: YES.

RAINER: YES.

RAINER: YES. DAVID: TO AVOID BACTERIAL

DAVID: TO AVOID BACTERIAL

DAVID: TO AVOID BACTERIAL CONTAMINATION FROM YOUR DISH

CONTAMINATION FROM YOUR DISH

CONTAMINATION FROM YOUR DISH TOWEL, AIR DRY YOUR DISHES

TOWEL, AIR DRY YOUR DISHES

TOWEL, AIR DRY YOUR DISHES WHENEVER POSSIBLE.

WHENEVER POSSIBLE.

WHENEVER POSSIBLE. IS THIS HOW YOU WASH YOUR

IS THIS HOW YOU WASH YOUR

IS THIS HOW YOU WASH YOUR DISHES EVERY DAY?

DISHES EVERY DAY?

DISHES EVERY DAY? RAINER: NO. I AM USING A

RAINER: NO. I AM USING A

RAINER: NO. I AM USING A DISHWASHER.

DISHWASHER.

DISHWASHER. DAVID: UHH!

DAVID: UHH!

DAVID: UHH! I WAS REALLY DEPRESSED AT THIS

I WAS REALLY DEPRESSED AT THIS

I WAS REALLY DEPRESSED AT THIS POINT, BECAUSE I FIGURED

POINT, BECAUSE I FIGURED

POINT, BECAUSE I FIGURED DISHWASHERS WERE MAKING HUMANS

DISHWASHERS WERE MAKING HUMANS

DISHWASHERS WERE MAKING HUMANS OBSOLETE. BUT THEN I THOUGHT IF

OBSOLETE. BUT THEN I THOUGHT IF

OBSOLETE. BUT THEN I THOUGHT IF I COULD FIND A MACHINE THAT

I COULD FIND A MACHINE THAT

I COULD FIND A MACHINE THAT COULD OUT-CLEAN A DISHWASHER,

COULD OUT-CLEAN A DISHWASHER,

COULD OUT-CLEAN A DISHWASHER, TEAM UP WITH THAT MACHINE,

TEAM UP WITH THAT MACHINE,

TEAM UP WITH THAT MACHINE, MAYBE EVEN GET MARRIED TO THAT

MAYBE EVEN GET MARRIED TO THAT

MAYBE EVEN GET MARRIED TO THAT MACHINE, MY NEW MACHINE SPOUSE

MACHINE, MY NEW MACHINE SPOUSE

MACHINE, MY NEW MACHINE SPOUSE AND I COULD CRUSH A DISHWASHER

AND I COULD CRUSH A DISHWASHER

AND I COULD CRUSH A DISHWASHER UNDER OUR BOOT HEEL. SO I WENT

UNDER OUR BOOT HEEL. SO I WENT

UNDER OUR BOOT HEEL. SO I WENT TO NASA.

TO NASA.

TO NASA. YOUR JOB IS?

YOUR JOB IS?

YOUR JOB IS? CASSIE: MY JOB IS THE PLANETARY

CASSIE: MY JOB IS THE PLANETARY

CASSIE: MY JOB IS THE PLANETARY PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA.

PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA.

PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA. DAVID: THE PLANETARY PROTECTION

DAVID: THE PLANETARY PROTECTION

DAVID: THE PLANETARY PROTECTION OFFICER FOR NASA. WHAT DO YOU

OFFICER FOR NASA. WHAT DO YOU

OFFICER FOR NASA. WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING?

DO FOR A LIVING?

DO FOR A LIVING? THIS IS THE GODDARD SPACE

THIS IS THE GODDARD SPACE

THIS IS THE GODDARD SPACE FLIGHT CENTER IN GREENBELT,

FLIGHT CENTER IN GREENBELT,

FLIGHT CENTER IN GREENBELT, MARYLAND, AND THIS IS CASSIE

MARYLAND, AND THIS IS CASSIE

MARYLAND, AND THIS IS CASSIE CONLEY. SHE HAS THE HIGH-STAKES

CONLEY. SHE HAS THE HIGH-STAKES

CONLEY. SHE HAS THE HIGH-STAKES JOB OF MAKING SURE ALL NASA

JOB OF MAKING SURE ALL NASA

JOB OF MAKING SURE ALL NASA SPACECRAFT ARE FREE OF DIRT AND

SPACECRAFT ARE FREE OF DIRT AND

SPACECRAFT ARE FREE OF DIRT AND BACTERIA.

BACTERIA.

BACTERIA. CASSIE: WE'RE ACTUALLY

CASSIE: WE'RE ACTUALLY

CASSIE: WE'RE ACTUALLY PROTECTING ALL OF THE PLANETS

PROTECTING ALL OF THE PLANETS

PROTECTING ALL OF THE PLANETS IN THIS SOLAR SYSTEM ALL OF THE

IN THIS SOLAR SYSTEM ALL OF THE

IN THIS SOLAR SYSTEM ALL OF THE TIME. THAT IS, WHEN WE SEND

TIME. THAT IS, WHEN WE SEND

TIME. THAT IS, WHEN WE SEND SPACECRAFT OUT...

SPACECRAFT OUT...

SPACECRAFT OUT... DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT.

DAVID: RIGHT. CASSIE: AND WHEN WE BRING

CASSIE: AND WHEN WE BRING

CASSIE: AND WHEN WE BRING SPACECRAFT BACK TO EARTH, WE

SPACECRAFT BACK TO EARTH, WE

SPACECRAFT BACK TO EARTH, WE ARE CONCERNED ABOUT MAKING SURE

ARE CONCERNED ABOUT MAKING SURE

ARE CONCERNED ABOUT MAKING SURE THAT THE PLANETS THAT WE GO TO

THAT THE PLANETS THAT WE GO TO

THAT THE PLANETS THAT WE GO TO DON'T GET CONTAMINATED WITH

DON'T GET CONTAMINATED WITH

DON'T GET CONTAMINATED WITH THINGS THAT WOULD INTERFERE

THINGS THAT WOULD INTERFERE

THINGS THAT WOULD INTERFERE WITH THE ACTIVITIES THAT WE

WITH THE ACTIVITIES THAT WE

WITH THE ACTIVITIES THAT WE WANT TO DO AT THOSE PLANETS.

WANT TO DO AT THOSE PLANETS.

WANT TO DO AT THOSE PLANETS. AND THEN ALSO, FOR BRINGING

AND THEN ALSO, FOR BRINGING

AND THEN ALSO, FOR BRINGING SAMPLES BACK TO EARTH, WE

SAMPLES BACK TO EARTH, WE

SAMPLES BACK TO EARTH, WE REALLY DON'T WANT TO CAUSE THE

REALLY DON'T WANT TO CAUSE THE

REALLY DON'T WANT TO CAUSE THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN.

ANDROMEDA STRAIN.

ANDROMEDA STRAIN. DAVID: THIS IS A POP CULTURE

DAVID: THIS IS A POP CULTURE

DAVID: THIS IS A POP CULTURE REFERENCE ABOUT A MOVIE THAT

REFERENCE ABOUT A MOVIE THAT

REFERENCE ABOUT A MOVIE THAT ALL OF YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO

ALL OF YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO

ALL OF YOU ARE TOO YOUNG TO REMEMBER.

REMEMBER.

REMEMBER. CASSIE: UH, POSSIBLY, YES.

CASSIE: UH, POSSIBLY, YES.

CASSIE: UH, POSSIBLY, YES. YEAH, SO WE DON'T--

YEAH, SO WE DON'T--

YEAH, SO WE DON'T-- DAVID: WHY DON'T YOU SUMMARIZE

DAVID: WHY DON'T YOU SUMMARIZE

DAVID: WHY DON'T YOU SUMMARIZE BRIEFLY TO THAT CAMERA THE,

BRIEFLY TO THAT CAMERA THE,

BRIEFLY TO THAT CAMERA THE, UH, PLOT OF "THE ANDROMEDA

UH, PLOT OF "THE ANDROMEDA

UH, PLOT OF "THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN."

STRAIN."

STRAIN." CASSIE: SO "THE ANDROMEDA

CASSIE: SO "THE ANDROMEDA

CASSIE: SO "THE ANDROMEDA STRAIN" IS A MOVIE IN WHICH A

STRAIN" IS A MOVIE IN WHICH A

STRAIN" IS A MOVIE IN WHICH A SPACECRAFT WENT OUT AND CAME

SPACECRAFT WENT OUT AND CAME

SPACECRAFT WENT OUT AND CAME BACK, AND WAS CONTAMINATED WITH

BACK, AND WAS CONTAMINATED WITH

BACK, AND WAS CONTAMINATED WITH ORGANISMS THAT THEN CAUSED

ORGANISMS THAT THEN CAUSED

ORGANISMS THAT THEN CAUSED MAJOR PROBLEMS WITH DISEASES ON

MAJOR PROBLEMS WITH DISEASES ON

MAJOR PROBLEMS WITH DISEASES ON EARTH.

EARTH.

EARTH. DAVID: BASICALLY, CASSIE IS

DAVID: BASICALLY, CASSIE IS

DAVID: BASICALLY, CASSIE IS KEEPING US SAFE FROM AN ALIEN

KEEPING US SAFE FROM AN ALIEN

KEEPING US SAFE FROM AN ALIEN INVASION, AND WE SHOULD ALL PAY

INVASION, AND WE SHOULD ALL PAY

INVASION, AND WE SHOULD ALL PAY HER $20 JUST TO BE NICE.

HER $20 JUST TO BE NICE.

HER $20 JUST TO BE NICE. AND THIS IS THE...

AND THIS IS THE...

AND THIS IS THE... CASSIE: THAT'S ACTUALLY AN OVEN

CASSIE: THAT'S ACTUALLY AN OVEN

CASSIE: THAT'S ACTUALLY AN OVEN THAT WE USE TO BAKE SPACECRAFT

THAT WE USE TO BAKE SPACECRAFT

THAT WE USE TO BAKE SPACECRAFT WITH, UM...

WITH, UM...

WITH, UM... DAVID: OK. SO THIS IS AN OVEN?

DAVID: OK. SO THIS IS AN OVEN?

DAVID: OK. SO THIS IS AN OVEN? CASSIE: YES. IT'S ACTUALLY A

CASSIE: YES. IT'S ACTUALLY A

CASSIE: YES. IT'S ACTUALLY A VACUUM OVEN. IT SUCKS THE AIR

VACUUM OVEN. IT SUCKS THE AIR

VACUUM OVEN. IT SUCKS THE AIR OUT OF THE OVEN, AS WELL AS

OUT OF THE OVEN, AS WELL AS

OUT OF THE OVEN, AS WELL AS PUTTING HEAT IN.

PUTTING HEAT IN.

PUTTING HEAT IN. DAVID: IF IT SUCKS ALL THE AIR

DAVID: IF IT SUCKS ALL THE AIR

DAVID: IF IT SUCKS ALL THE AIR OUT OF THE OVEN, WHAT IS IT

OUT OF THE OVEN, WHAT IS IT

OUT OF THE OVEN, WHAT IS IT THAT GETS HOT?

THAT GETS HOT?

THAT GETS HOT? CASSIE: INFRARED LIGHT WILL HIT

CASSIE: INFRARED LIGHT WILL HIT

CASSIE: INFRARED LIGHT WILL HIT THE SURFACES OF THE SPACECRAFT,

THE SURFACES OF THE SPACECRAFT,

THE SURFACES OF THE SPACECRAFT, WHAT'S EVER INSIDE, AND MAKE

WHAT'S EVER INSIDE, AND MAKE

WHAT'S EVER INSIDE, AND MAKE THAT WARM.

THAT WARM.

THAT WARM. DAVID: ARE YOU HEATING

DAVID: ARE YOU HEATING

DAVID: ARE YOU HEATING SPACECRAFT IN HERE TO CLEAN

SPACECRAFT IN HERE TO CLEAN

SPACECRAFT IN HERE TO CLEAN THEM?

THEM?

THEM? CASSIE: NOT THIS OVEN RIGHT

CASSIE: NOT THIS OVEN RIGHT

CASSIE: NOT THIS OVEN RIGHT NOW...

NOW...

NOW... DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. CASSIE: BUT WE COULD.

CASSIE: BUT WE COULD.

CASSIE: BUT WE COULD. DAVID: ONE OF THE MOST

DAVID: ONE OF THE MOST

DAVID: ONE OF THE MOST DISGUSTING THINGS ABOUT NASA IS

DISGUSTING THINGS ABOUT NASA IS

DISGUSTING THINGS ABOUT NASA IS THEIR UNFETTERED IDEALISM. FOR

THEIR UNFETTERED IDEALISM. FOR

THEIR UNFETTERED IDEALISM. FOR INSTANCE, CASSIE SHOWED ME A

INSTANCE, CASSIE SHOWED ME A

INSTANCE, CASSIE SHOWED ME A PLACE WHERE HUMANS AND MACHINES

PLACE WHERE HUMANS AND MACHINES

PLACE WHERE HUMANS AND MACHINES WORK SIDE BY SIDE TO MAKE

WORK SIDE BY SIDE TO MAKE

WORK SIDE BY SIDE TO MAKE THINGS REALLY, REALLY CLEAN.

THINGS REALLY, REALLY CLEAN.

THINGS REALLY, REALLY CLEAN. IT'S CALLED A CLEANROOM, AND

IT'S CALLED A CLEANROOM, AND

IT'S CALLED A CLEANROOM, AND IT JUST ABOUT MADE ME SICK.

IT JUST ABOUT MADE ME SICK.

IT JUST ABOUT MADE ME SICK. CASSIE: SO THIS IS AN OPTICAL

CASSIE: SO THIS IS AN OPTICAL

CASSIE: SO THIS IS AN OPTICAL CLEANROOM.

CLEANROOM.

CLEANROOM. DAVID: AN OPTICAL CLEANROOM.

DAVID: AN OPTICAL CLEANROOM.

DAVID: AN OPTICAL CLEANROOM. CASSIE: THEY'RE TESTING LASERS

CASSIE: THEY'RE TESTING LASERS

CASSIE: THEY'RE TESTING LASERS FOR ONE OF OUR, UH, SPACECRAFT

FOR ONE OF OUR, UH, SPACECRAFT

FOR ONE OF OUR, UH, SPACECRAFT GOING--I THINK, STAYING IN

GOING--I THINK, STAYING IN

GOING--I THINK, STAYING IN EARTH ORBIT OR GOING ON THE

EARTH ORBIT OR GOING ON THE

EARTH ORBIT OR GOING ON THE SHUTTLE.

SHUTTLE.

SHUTTLE. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. CASSIE: YOU WORRY ABOUT

CASSIE: YOU WORRY ABOUT

CASSIE: YOU WORRY ABOUT PARTICLES THAT COULD GET ON THE

PARTICLES THAT COULD GET ON THE

PARTICLES THAT COULD GET ON THE OPTICS AND STOP THE LASER FROM

OPTICS AND STOP THE LASER FROM

OPTICS AND STOP THE LASER FROM GOING THROUGH.

GOING THROUGH.

GOING THROUGH. DAVID: YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT,

DAVID: YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT,

DAVID: YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT, LIKE, LITTLE PIECES OF DUST

LIKE, LITTLE PIECES OF DUST

LIKE, LITTLE PIECES OF DUST FLOATING THROUGH THE AIR?

FLOATING THROUGH THE AIR?

FLOATING THROUGH THE AIR? CASSIE: LITTLE PIECES OF DUST,

CASSIE: LITTLE PIECES OF DUST,

CASSIE: LITTLE PIECES OF DUST, REALLY TINY PIECES OF DUST,

REALLY TINY PIECES OF DUST,

REALLY TINY PIECES OF DUST, PIECES OF DUST THAT ARE 1/1000

PIECES OF DUST THAT ARE 1/1000

PIECES OF DUST THAT ARE 1/1000 THE DIAMETER OF YOUR HAIR. SO

THE DIAMETER OF YOUR HAIR. SO

THE DIAMETER OF YOUR HAIR. SO LITTLE, EENY, TINY--

LITTLE, EENY, TINY--

LITTLE, EENY, TINY-- DAVID: THEY GOT THAT STUFF OUT

DAVID: THEY GOT THAT STUFF OUT

DAVID: THEY GOT THAT STUFF OUT OF HERE?

OF HERE?

OF HERE? CASSIE: YES, THEY DO. WE HAVE

CASSIE: YES, THEY DO. WE HAVE

CASSIE: YES, THEY DO. WE HAVE FILTERS THAT FILTER THE AIR,

FILTERS THAT FILTER THE AIR,

FILTERS THAT FILTER THE AIR, AND SO THERE'S AIR

AND SO THERE'S AIR

AND SO THERE'S AIR CHANGING--FLOWING THROUGH HERE

CHANGING--FLOWING THROUGH HERE

CHANGING--FLOWING THROUGH HERE ALL THE TIME, AND THAT FILTERS

ALL THE TIME, AND THAT FILTERS

ALL THE TIME, AND THAT FILTERS OUT ALL THE PARTICLES. IN

OUT ALL THE PARTICLES. IN

OUT ALL THE PARTICLES. IN ADDITION, THE FILT--SOME OF THE

ADDITION, THE FILT--SOME OF THE

ADDITION, THE FILT--SOME OF THE FILTERS, ALSO ARE--FILTER OUT

FILTERS, ALSO ARE--FILTER OUT

FILTERS, ALSO ARE--FILTER OUT ORGANIC MOLECULES.

ORGANIC MOLECULES.

ORGANIC MOLECULES. DAVID: OK. BUT--

DAVID: OK. BUT--

DAVID: OK. BUT-- CASSIE: SO IN THIS CASE, SMELL

CASSIE: SO IN THIS CASE, SMELL

CASSIE: SO IN THIS CASE, SMELL IS A CONTAMINANT.

IS A CONTAMINANT.

IS A CONTAMINANT. DAVID: BECAUSE A SMELL WOULD

DAVID: BECAUSE A SMELL WOULD

DAVID: BECAUSE A SMELL WOULD INDICATE THE PRESENCE OF

INDICATE THE PRESENCE OF

INDICATE THE PRESENCE OF ORGANIC MOLECULES AND COMPOUNDS?

ORGANIC MOLECULES AND COMPOUNDS?

ORGANIC MOLECULES AND COMPOUNDS? CASSIE: PRECISELY. NO PERFUME,

CASSIE: PRECISELY. NO PERFUME,

CASSIE: PRECISELY. NO PERFUME, NO HAIRSPRAY, NO DEODORANT.

NO HAIRSPRAY, NO DEODORANT.

NO HAIRSPRAY, NO DEODORANT. DAVID: HOLD ON.

DAVID: HOLD ON.

DAVID: HOLD ON. THESE GUYS AREN'T WEARING

THESE GUYS AREN'T WEARING

THESE GUYS AREN'T WEARING DEODORANT?

DEODORANT?

DEODORANT? CASSIE: IT GETS A LITTLE SMELLY

CASSIE: IT GETS A LITTLE SMELLY

CASSIE: IT GETS A LITTLE SMELLY AFTER A WHILE, WHICH ACTUALLY

AFTER A WHILE, WHICH ACTUALLY

AFTER A WHILE, WHICH ACTUALLY MEANS THAT THEY SHOULD GO OUT

MEANS THAT THEY SHOULD GO OUT

MEANS THAT THEY SHOULD GO OUT AND TAKE A SHOWER AND COME BACK

AND TAKE A SHOWER AND COME BACK

AND TAKE A SHOWER AND COME BACK IN.

IN.

IN. DAVID: NONE OF THOSE GUYS ARE

DAVID: NONE OF THOSE GUYS ARE

DAVID: NONE OF THOSE GUYS ARE WEARING DEODORANT RIGHT NOW...

WEARING DEODORANT RIGHT NOW...

WEARING DEODORANT RIGHT NOW... CASSIE: PROBABLY NOT.

CASSIE: PROBABLY NOT.

CASSIE: PROBABLY NOT. DAVID: BECAUSE THE DEODORANT

DAVID: BECAUSE THE DEODORANT

DAVID: BECAUSE THE DEODORANT WOULD INTRODUCE CONTAMINANTS...

WOULD INTRODUCE CONTAMINANTS...

WOULD INTRODUCE CONTAMINANTS... CASSIE: RIGHT.

CASSIE: RIGHT.

CASSIE: RIGHT. DAVID: AND THAT WOULD MESS UP

DAVID: AND THAT WOULD MESS UP

DAVID: AND THAT WOULD MESS UP THE LASER COMMUNICATION?

THE LASER COMMUNICATION?

THE LASER COMMUNICATION? CASSIE: PRECISELY.

CASSIE: PRECISELY.

CASSIE: PRECISELY. DAVID: COMING UP: MAN VERSUS

DAVID: COMING UP: MAN VERSUS

DAVID: COMING UP: MAN VERSUS MACHINE, HUMAN VERSUS ROBOT,

MACHINE, HUMAN VERSUS ROBOT,

MACHINE, HUMAN VERSUS ROBOT, HOPE VERSUS DESPAIR, LIFE

HOPE VERSUS DESPAIR, LIFE

HOPE VERSUS DESPAIR, LIFE VERSUS DEATH.

VERSUS DEATH.

VERSUS DEATH. DAMN IT.

DAMN IT.

DAMN IT. DAVID: TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,

DAVID: TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH,

DAVID: TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH, MY TRIP TO NASA KIND OF FREAKED

MY TRIP TO NASA KIND OF FREAKED

MY TRIP TO NASA KIND OF FREAKED ME OUT, BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE,

ME OUT, BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE,

ME OUT, BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE, I'M NEVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO

I'M NEVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO

I'M NEVER GOING TO BE ABLE TO GET MY DISHES THAT CLEAN. I

GET MY DISHES THAT CLEAN. I

GET MY DISHES THAT CLEAN. I CAN'T FIT ONE OF THESE GIGANTIC

CAN'T FIT ONE OF THESE GIGANTIC

CAN'T FIT ONE OF THESE GIGANTIC OVENS IN MY HOUSE OR PAY A

OVENS IN MY HOUSE OR PAY A

OVENS IN MY HOUSE OR PAY A BUNCH OF GUYS IN SPACESUITS TO

BUNCH OF GUYS IN SPACESUITS TO

BUNCH OF GUYS IN SPACESUITS TO GO OVER EVERYTHING WITH THEIR

GO OVER EVERYTHING WITH THEIR

GO OVER EVERYTHING WITH THEIR WEIRD CLOTHS AND RAGS. HOW

WEIRD CLOTHS AND RAGS. HOW

WEIRD CLOTHS AND RAGS. HOW CLEAN DO MY DISHES HAVE TO BE?

CLEAN DO MY DISHES HAVE TO BE?

CLEAN DO MY DISHES HAVE TO BE? WHAT IS YOUR DISHWASHING

WHAT IS YOUR DISHWASHING

WHAT IS YOUR DISHWASHING PRACTICE?

PRACTICE?

PRACTICE? CASSIE: TO SCRUB THE DISHES A

CASSIE: TO SCRUB THE DISHES A

CASSIE: TO SCRUB THE DISHES A LOT. MECHANICAL REMOVAL IS THE

LOT. MECHANICAL REMOVAL IS THE

LOT. MECHANICAL REMOVAL IS THE BEST MECHANISM FOR BIOBURDEN

BEST MECHANISM FOR BIOBURDEN

BEST MECHANISM FOR BIOBURDEN REDUCTION.

REDUCTION.

REDUCTION. DAVID: AND WHAT IS "BIOBURDEN"?

DAVID: AND WHAT IS "BIOBURDEN"?

DAVID: AND WHAT IS "BIOBURDEN"? JUST--

JUST--

JUST-- CASSIE: "BIOBURDEN" MEANS ALL

CASSIE: "BIOBURDEN" MEANS ALL

CASSIE: "BIOBURDEN" MEANS ALL THOSE LITTLE, INVISIBLE THINGS

THOSE LITTLE, INVISIBLE THINGS

THOSE LITTLE, INVISIBLE THINGS THAT ARE ON YOUR DISHES.

THAT ARE ON YOUR DISHES.

THAT ARE ON YOUR DISHES. DAVID: SO YOU SCRUB A LOT?

DAVID: SO YOU SCRUB A LOT?

DAVID: SO YOU SCRUB A LOT? CASSIE: I SCRUB THE DISHES A

CASSIE: I SCRUB THE DISHES A

CASSIE: I SCRUB THE DISHES A LOT. BUT IT DEPENDS ON WHAT

LOT. BUT IT DEPENDS ON WHAT

LOT. BUT IT DEPENDS ON WHAT YOUR--WHAT YOU NEED TO BE

YOUR--WHAT YOU NEED TO BE

YOUR--WHAT YOU NEED TO BE CLEANED, HOW YOU NEED THINGS TO

CLEANED, HOW YOU NEED THINGS TO

CLEANED, HOW YOU NEED THINGS TO BE--WHAT THE DEFINITION OF

BE--WHAT THE DEFINITION OF

BE--WHAT THE DEFINITION OF CLEAN IS.

CLEAN IS.

CLEAN IS. DAVID: YOU NEED TO DECIDE,

DAVID: YOU NEED TO DECIDE,

DAVID: YOU NEED TO DECIDE, BEFORE YOU EVEN WASH YOUR

BEFORE YOU EVEN WASH YOUR

BEFORE YOU EVEN WASH YOUR DISHES, WHAT CLEAN MEANS TO

DISHES, WHAT CLEAN MEANS TO

DISHES, WHAT CLEAN MEANS TO YOU RELATIVE TO YOUR OWN

YOU RELATIVE TO YOUR OWN

YOU RELATIVE TO YOUR OWN PREFERENCES?

PREFERENCES?

PREFERENCES? CASSIE: EXACTLY.

CASSIE: EXACTLY.

CASSIE: EXACTLY. DAVID: AND THEN YOU PICK A

DAVID: AND THEN YOU PICK A

DAVID: AND THEN YOU PICK A STRATEGY BASED ON THAT?

STRATEGY BASED ON THAT?

STRATEGY BASED ON THAT? CASSIE: PRECISELY. THAT'S

CASSIE: PRECISELY. THAT'S

CASSIE: PRECISELY. THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT SPACECRAFT

EXACTLY WHAT SPACECRAFT

EXACTLY WHAT SPACECRAFT ENGINEERS ARE--REALLY IMPORTANT

ENGINEERS ARE--REALLY IMPORTANT

ENGINEERS ARE--REALLY IMPORTANT FOR THEM TO FIGURE OUT.

FOR THEM TO FIGURE OUT.

FOR THEM TO FIGURE OUT. DAVID: YOU GUYS HAVE TO DEFINE

DAVID: YOU GUYS HAVE TO DEFINE

DAVID: YOU GUYS HAVE TO DEFINE YOUR GOAL BEFORE YOU EVEN KNOW

YOUR GOAL BEFORE YOU EVEN KNOW

YOUR GOAL BEFORE YOU EVEN KNOW THE STRATEGY THAT YOU'RE GOING

THE STRATEGY THAT YOU'RE GOING

THE STRATEGY THAT YOU'RE GOING TO EMPLOY TO ACHIEVE THAT GOAL?

TO EMPLOY TO ACHIEVE THAT GOAL?

TO EMPLOY TO ACHIEVE THAT GOAL? CASSIE: ABSOLUTELY.

CASSIE: ABSOLUTELY.

CASSIE: ABSOLUTELY. DAVID: I ALWAYS THOUGHT, "I'M

DAVID: I ALWAYS THOUGHT, "I'M

DAVID: I ALWAYS THOUGHT, "I'M GOING TO CLEAN MY DISHES, AND

GOING TO CLEAN MY DISHES, AND

GOING TO CLEAN MY DISHES, AND THAT MEANS THAT WHEN I'M DONE

THAT MEANS THAT WHEN I'M DONE

THAT MEANS THAT WHEN I'M DONE CLEANING THEM, THEY'LL BE LIKE

CLEANING THEM, THEY'LL BE LIKE

CLEANING THEM, THEY'LL BE LIKE BRAND NEW, LIKE FRESH OUT OF

BRAND NEW, LIKE FRESH OUT OF

BRAND NEW, LIKE FRESH OUT OF THE BOX. THERE'LL BE NOTHING

THE BOX. THERE'LL BE NOTHING

THE BOX. THERE'LL BE NOTHING ON THEM."

ON THEM."

ON THEM." CASSIE: BUT--

CASSIE: BUT--

CASSIE: BUT-- DAVID: AND THEN I WAS LIKE,

DAVID: AND THEN I WAS LIKE,

DAVID: AND THEN I WAS LIKE, "THAT'S ACTUALLY A LOT OF

"THAT'S ACTUALLY A LOT OF

"THAT'S ACTUALLY A LOT OF WORK..."

WORK..."

WORK..." CASSIE: YES.

CASSIE: YES.

CASSIE: YES. DAVID: "MAYBE I'LL CLEAN THEM

DAVID: "MAYBE I'LL CLEAN THEM

DAVID: "MAYBE I'LL CLEAN THEM ENOUGH SO THAT I DON'T DIE."

ENOUGH SO THAT I DON'T DIE."

ENOUGH SO THAT I DON'T DIE." CASSIE: THAT'S THE DIFFERENCE

CASSIE: THAT'S THE DIFFERENCE

CASSIE: THAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN VIKING AND PATHFINDER.

BETWEEN VIKING AND PATHFINDER.

BETWEEN VIKING AND PATHFINDER. DAVID: VIKING AND PATHFINDER

DAVID: VIKING AND PATHFINDER

DAVID: VIKING AND PATHFINDER ARE?

ARE?

ARE? CASSIE: TWO MARS LANDERS.

CASSIE: TWO MARS LANDERS.

CASSIE: TWO MARS LANDERS. DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK.

DAVID: OK. CASSIE: THE VIKING LANDERS WERE

CASSIE: THE VIKING LANDERS WERE

CASSIE: THE VIKING LANDERS WERE THE ONES WE FIRST SENT TO MARS,

THE ONES WE FIRST SENT TO MARS,

THE ONES WE FIRST SENT TO MARS, AND WE SAID, "THEY HAVE TO BE

AND WE SAID, "THEY HAVE TO BE

AND WE SAID, "THEY HAVE TO BE REALLY CLEAN. WE'RE GOING TO

REALLY CLEAN. WE'RE GOING TO

REALLY CLEAN. WE'RE GOING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE THEM

FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE THEM

FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE THEM REALLY, REALLY CLEAN, PUT THEM

REALLY, REALLY CLEAN, PUT THEM

REALLY, REALLY CLEAN, PUT THEM IN AN OVEN AND BAKE THEM." THE

IN AN OVEN AND BAKE THEM." THE

IN AN OVEN AND BAKE THEM." THE PATHFINDER, THE MARS

PATHFINDER, THE MARS

PATHFINDER, THE MARS EXPLORATION ROVERS--WE ALREADY

EXPLORATION ROVERS--WE ALREADY

EXPLORATION ROVERS--WE ALREADY KNEW SOMETHING ABOUT THE

KNEW SOMETHING ABOUT THE

KNEW SOMETHING ABOUT THE SURFACE OF MARS. "OH, YOU KNOW,

SURFACE OF MARS. "OH, YOU KNOW,

SURFACE OF MARS. "OH, YOU KNOW, IT'S PRETTY HARSH TO--"

IT'S PRETTY HARSH TO--"

IT'S PRETTY HARSH TO--" DAVID: DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THAT

DAVID: DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THAT

DAVID: DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THAT CLEAN.

CLEAN.

CLEAN. CASSIE: AND THEN YOU DON'T BAKE

CASSIE: AND THEN YOU DON'T BAKE

CASSIE: AND THEN YOU DON'T BAKE THEM.

THEM.

THEM. DAVID: SO I STARTED OUT AS A

DAVID: SO I STARTED OUT AS A

DAVID: SO I STARTED OUT AS A DISHWASHING...

DISHWASHING...

DISHWASHING... CASSIE: VIKING.

CASSIE: VIKING.

CASSIE: VIKING. DAVID: BUT NOW, BECAUSE I'M

DAVID: BUT NOW, BECAUSE I'M

DAVID: BUT NOW, BECAUSE I'M GETTING LAZY, AND I'M MORE OR

GETTING LAZY, AND I'M MORE OR

GETTING LAZY, AND I'M MORE OR LESS HEALTHY, I MIGHT TURN INTO

LESS HEALTHY, I MIGHT TURN INTO

LESS HEALTHY, I MIGHT TURN INTO A DISHWASHING...

A DISHWASHING...

A DISHWASHING... CASSIE: ROVER.

CASSIE: ROVER.

CASSIE: ROVER. DAVID: A DISHWASHING ROVER. OK.

DAVID: A DISHWASHING ROVER. OK.

DAVID: A DISHWASHING ROVER. OK. SO ACCORDING TO NASA, "CLEAN"

SO ACCORDING TO NASA, "CLEAN"

SO ACCORDING TO NASA, "CLEAN" IS A RELATIVE TERM, BUT THAT

IS A RELATIVE TERM, BUT THAT

IS A RELATIVE TERM, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN LET YOUR

DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN LET YOUR

DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN LET YOUR DISHES SIT AROUND WITH A BUNCH

DISHES SIT AROUND WITH A BUNCH

DISHES SIT AROUND WITH A BUNCH OF BIOBURDENS ALL OVER THEM.

OF BIOBURDENS ALL OVER THEM.

OF BIOBURDENS ALL OVER THEM. ACCORDING TO MY FRIENDS AND

ACCORDING TO MY FRIENDS AND

ACCORDING TO MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY, IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO

FAMILY, IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO

FAMILY, IT WAS TIME FOR ME TO DO MY DISHES.

DO MY DISHES.

DO MY DISHES. FOR HEAVILY SOILED COOKING POTS

FOR HEAVILY SOILED COOKING POTS

FOR HEAVILY SOILED COOKING POTS AND PANS, SOAK WITH HOT WATER

AND PANS, SOAK WITH HOT WATER

AND PANS, SOAK WITH HOT WATER AND A DROP OF SOAP IMMEDIATELY

AND A DROP OF SOAP IMMEDIATELY

AND A DROP OF SOAP IMMEDIATELY AFTER USE. USE A LIGHT SCRAPING

AFTER USE. USE A LIGHT SCRAPING

AFTER USE. USE A LIGHT SCRAPING MOTION OF STEADILY INCREASING

MOTION OF STEADILY INCREASING

MOTION OF STEADILY INCREASING ANGLES TO REMOVE BIOBURDENS.

ANGLES TO REMOVE BIOBURDENS.

ANGLES TO REMOVE BIOBURDENS. FILL ONE BASIN HALFWAY WITH HOT

FILL ONE BASIN HALFWAY WITH HOT

FILL ONE BASIN HALFWAY WITH HOT WATER FOR WASHING AND A SECOND

WATER FOR WASHING AND A SECOND

WATER FOR WASHING AND A SECOND BASIN HALFWAY WITH COLD WATER

BASIN HALFWAY WITH COLD WATER

BASIN HALFWAY WITH COLD WATER FOR RINSING. DON'T ADD SOAP TO

FOR RINSING. DON'T ADD SOAP TO

FOR RINSING. DON'T ADD SOAP TO YOUR SPONGE. ADD SOAP DIRECTLY

YOUR SPONGE. ADD SOAP DIRECTLY

YOUR SPONGE. ADD SOAP DIRECTLY TO YOUR HOT WATER, USING LESS

TO YOUR HOT WATER, USING LESS

TO YOUR HOT WATER, USING LESS THAN YOU THINK YOU NEED. A

THAN YOU THINK YOU NEED. A

THAN YOU THINK YOU NEED. A FOAMY SINK IS NOT GOOD FOR

FOAMY SINK IS NOT GOOD FOR

FOAMY SINK IS NOT GOOD FOR WASHING. FOR HIPPIE

WASHING. FOR HIPPIE

WASHING. FOR HIPPIE AUTHENTICITY AND REDUCED

AUTHENTICITY AND REDUCED

AUTHENTICITY AND REDUCED BACTERIAL RISK, USE ALL-NATURAL

BACTERIAL RISK, USE ALL-NATURAL

BACTERIAL RISK, USE ALL-NATURAL SPONGES. CLEAN YOUR NATURAL

SPONGES. CLEAN YOUR NATURAL

SPONGES. CLEAN YOUR NATURAL SPONGE ONCE A MONTH BY SOAKING

SPONGE ONCE A MONTH BY SOAKING

SPONGE ONCE A MONTH BY SOAKING IT IN A SOLUTION OF BAKING SODA

IT IN A SOLUTION OF BAKING SODA

IT IN A SOLUTION OF BAKING SODA AND WATER. STARTING WITH YOUR

AND WATER. STARTING WITH YOUR

AND WATER. STARTING WITH YOUR LEAST SOILED ITEMS, WASH IN THE

LEAST SOILED ITEMS, WASH IN THE

LEAST SOILED ITEMS, WASH IN THE HOT WATER, DIP IN THE COLD

HOT WATER, DIP IN THE COLD

HOT WATER, DIP IN THE COLD WATER TO RINSE, THEN MOVE TO A

WATER TO RINSE, THEN MOVE TO A

WATER TO RINSE, THEN MOVE TO A RACK FOR AIR DRYING. IF YOUR

RACK FOR AIR DRYING. IF YOUR

RACK FOR AIR DRYING. IF YOUR WASH BASIN IS GETTING TRULY

WASH BASIN IS GETTING TRULY

WASH BASIN IS GETTING TRULY DISGUSTING, YOU CAN REFILL IT

DISGUSTING, YOU CAN REFILL IT

DISGUSTING, YOU CAN REFILL IT WITH FRESH HOT WATER. I WAS

WITH FRESH HOT WATER. I WAS

WITH FRESH HOT WATER. I WAS READY TO TEST MY SKILLS AGAINST

READY TO TEST MY SKILLS AGAINST

READY TO TEST MY SKILLS AGAINST MY OWN DISHWASHER AND PROVE

MY OWN DISHWASHER AND PROVE

MY OWN DISHWASHER AND PROVE THAT I COULD DO THE DISHES

THAT I COULD DO THE DISHES

THAT I COULD DO THE DISHES FASTER AND BETTER WHILE USING

FASTER AND BETTER WHILE USING

FASTER AND BETTER WHILE USING LESS WATER. SO I TOOK ABOUT A

LESS WATER. SO I TOOK ABOUT A

LESS WATER. SO I TOOK ABOUT A MONTH'S WORTH OF DIRTY DISHES

MONTH'S WORTH OF DIRTY DISHES

MONTH'S WORTH OF DIRTY DISHES AND SPLIT THEM UP. HALF WERE

AND SPLIT THEM UP. HALF WERE

AND SPLIT THEM UP. HALF WERE FOR ME, AND HALF WERE FOR MY

FOR ME, AND HALF WERE FOR MY

FOR ME, AND HALF WERE FOR MY DISHWASHER.

DISHWASHER.

DISHWASHER. LET'S GO.

LET'S GO.

LET'S GO. I RECRUITED OUR PRODUCTION

I RECRUITED OUR PRODUCTION

I RECRUITED OUR PRODUCTION MANAGER, PAULLINA, TO HELP THE

MANAGER, PAULLINA, TO HELP THE

MANAGER, PAULLINA, TO HELP THE DISHWASHER WITH TASKS THAT IT

DISHWASHER WITH TASKS THAT IT

DISHWASHER WITH TASKS THAT IT COULDN'T DO ITSELF BECAUSE IT

COULDN'T DO ITSELF BECAUSE IT

COULDN'T DO ITSELF BECAUSE IT DIDN'T HAVE ARMS.

DIDN'T HAVE ARMS.

DIDN'T HAVE ARMS. LOOK AT HOW SHE'S LOADING THIS

LOOK AT HOW SHE'S LOADING THIS

LOOK AT HOW SHE'S LOADING THIS DISHWASHER. HAVE YOU EVER

DISHWASHER. HAVE YOU EVER

DISHWASHER. HAVE YOU EVER LOADED A DISHWASHER BEFORE?

LOADED A DISHWASHER BEFORE?

LOADED A DISHWASHER BEFORE? TO PROVE THAT I COULD USE LESS

TO PROVE THAT I COULD USE LESS

TO PROVE THAT I COULD USE LESS WATER THAN THE DEVIL

WATER THAN THE DEVIL

WATER THAN THE DEVIL CONTRAPTION, I MEASURED

CONTRAPTION, I MEASURED

CONTRAPTION, I MEASURED EVERYTHING I USED IN A

EVERYTHING I USED IN A

EVERYTHING I USED IN A TWO-GALLON WATERING CAN.

TWO-GALLON WATERING CAN.

TWO-GALLON WATERING CAN. OK. NOW IT BEGINS. MAN VERSUS

OK. NOW IT BEGINS. MAN VERSUS

OK. NOW IT BEGINS. MAN VERSUS MACHINE.

MACHINE.

MACHINE. I WASHED EACH ITEM IN SOAPY,

I WASHED EACH ITEM IN SOAPY,

I WASHED EACH ITEM IN SOAPY, HOT WATER AND THEN RINSED IN

HOT WATER AND THEN RINSED IN

HOT WATER AND THEN RINSED IN COOL, CLEAN WATER.

COOL, CLEAN WATER.

COOL, CLEAN WATER. REALLY, THE NUMBER ONE THING IS

REALLY, THE NUMBER ONE THING IS

REALLY, THE NUMBER ONE THING IS SCRAPING. THAT'S HALF THE GAME

SCRAPING. THAT'S HALF THE GAME

SCRAPING. THAT'S HALF THE GAME AT LEAST. WHOO.

AT LEAST. WHOO.

AT LEAST. WHOO. AS THE MINUTES TICKED BY, THE

AS THE MINUTES TICKED BY, THE

AS THE MINUTES TICKED BY, THE PRESSURE WAS GETTING TO ME.

PRESSURE WAS GETTING TO ME.

PRESSURE WAS GETTING TO ME. COME ON. DAMN IT. THIS SUCKS.

COME ON. DAMN IT. THIS SUCKS.

COME ON. DAMN IT. THIS SUCKS. BUT I PERSEVERED, AND IN THE

BUT I PERSEVERED, AND IN THE

BUT I PERSEVERED, AND IN THE END...

END...

END... WHOO! I DID IT. THIS PIECE OF

WHOO! I DID IT. THIS PIECE OF

WHOO! I DID IT. THIS PIECE OF JUNK'S STILL RINSING. I'M

JUNK'S STILL RINSING. I'M

JUNK'S STILL RINSING. I'M BETTER AT WASHING DISHES THAN A

BETTER AT WASHING DISHES THAN A

BETTER AT WASHING DISHES THAN A MACHINE.

MACHINE.

MACHINE. AND I USED A GALLON LESS WATER

AND I USED A GALLON LESS WATER

AND I USED A GALLON LESS WATER THAN MY MODEL OF DISHWASHER

THAN MY MODEL OF DISHWASHER

THAN MY MODEL OF DISHWASHER USES.

USES.

USES. MEANWHILE, THIS THING IS STILL

MEANWHILE, THIS THING IS STILL

MEANWHILE, THIS THING IS STILL GOING. AND WE SHOULD ADMIT

GOING. AND WE SHOULD ADMIT

GOING. AND WE SHOULD ADMIT THAT, YEAH, THIS IS NOT A NEW

THAT, YEAH, THIS IS NOT A NEW

THAT, YEAH, THIS IS NOT A NEW DISHWASHER. LET'S NOT GET TOO

DISHWASHER. LET'S NOT GET TOO

DISHWASHER. LET'S NOT GET TOO MANY SHOTS OF THAT DISHWASHER.

MANY SHOTS OF THAT DISHWASHER.

MANY SHOTS OF THAT DISHWASHER. IT'S MAYBE THE NASTIEST THING

IT'S MAYBE THE NASTIEST THING

IT'S MAYBE THE NASTIEST THING IN MY HOUSE OTHER THAN MY

IN MY HOUSE OTHER THAN MY

IN MY HOUSE OTHER THAN MY REFRIGERATOR AND MY COLLECTION

REFRIGERATOR AND MY COLLECTION

REFRIGERATOR AND MY COLLECTION OF BROKEN TOILETS.

OF BROKEN TOILETS.

OF BROKEN TOILETS. THEN, FINALLY, THE DISHWASHER

THEN, FINALLY, THE DISHWASHER

THEN, FINALLY, THE DISHWASHER STOPPED.

STOPPED.

STOPPED. PAULLINA, YOUR DISHES ARE

PAULLINA, YOUR DISHES ARE

PAULLINA, YOUR DISHES ARE FILTHY. LOOK HOW DIRTY THAT IS.

FILTHY. LOOK HOW DIRTY THAT IS.

FILTHY. LOOK HOW DIRTY THAT IS. OH! LOOK AT THIS SPATULA!

OH! LOOK AT THIS SPATULA!

OH! LOOK AT THIS SPATULA! PAULLINA: OHH!

PAULLINA: OHH!

PAULLINA: OHH! DAVID: OH, BUSTED!

DAVID: OH, BUSTED!

DAVID: OH, BUSTED! OK, SO MY DISHWASHER IS SUPER

OK, SO MY DISHWASHER IS SUPER

OK, SO MY DISHWASHER IS SUPER OLD, AND MAYBE MODERN

OLD, AND MAYBE MODERN

OLD, AND MAYBE MODERN DISHWASHERS COULD DO A BETTER

DISHWASHERS COULD DO A BETTER

DISHWASHERS COULD DO A BETTER JOB AND USE LESS WATER THAN IT

JOB AND USE LESS WATER THAN IT

JOB AND USE LESS WATER THAN IT DID. WELL, I'LL TELL YOU ONE

DID. WELL, I'LL TELL YOU ONE

DID. WELL, I'LL TELL YOU ONE THING. TO ALL YOU MODERN

THING. TO ALL YOU MODERN

THING. TO ALL YOU MODERN DISHWASHERS, BRING IT ON. I'LL

DISHWASHERS, BRING IT ON. I'LL

DISHWASHERS, BRING IT ON. I'LL BE STANDING RIGHT HERE, PROUD

BE STANDING RIGHT HERE, PROUD

BE STANDING RIGHT HERE, PROUD AND TALL, A HUMAN WASHING

AND TALL, A HUMAN WASHING

AND TALL, A HUMAN WASHING DISHES.

DISHES.

DISHES. HUMANS ARE BETTER THAN

HUMANS ARE BETTER THAN

HUMANS ARE BETTER THAN MACHINES. GOOD-BYE.

MACHINES. GOOD-BYE.

The Description of How to Do the Dishes