All right, ladies.
The Willie T. Ribbs Racer Cheerleaders
are about perfection, hard work, sweat, tears...
If you can't take a five-story fall...
( echoing ): and bounce right up...
you better bounce out of here now.
( distressed murmuring )
Dang, can't you all take a joke?
Dijonay, can we just get on with it?
Look, if anyone doesn't like the way I'm running this tryout
you can break now.
( murmuring )
Dang, can't any of y'all take a joke?
Now, the Racers only need one more body on the squad
and it has to fit
into this uniform.
( all laughing )
Oh, now you all got a sense of humor.
Well, I'm not joking
because this is the last uniform we've got.
Okay, let's do this.
Uh, go, go, go, Ribbs Racers.
Racers spread peace.
Racers spread love.
Racers spread happiness.
Come on, everybody.
Cheer for the Racers. Whoo!
♪ U-G-L-Y ♪
♪ You ain't got no alibi ♪
♪ You ugly, uh, uh ♪
♪ You ugly, uh, uh. ♪
♪ We're not here to do some stupid cheer ♪
♪ So just empty your pockets ♪
♪ And put the money in here ♪
♪ Now! ♪
Dang, they got us again.
Who invited them, anyway?
♪ The Proud Family ♪
♪ What? ♪
♪ You and me will always be tight ♪
♪ Family, every single day and night ♪
♪ Even when you start acting like a fool ♪
♪ You know I'm loving every single thing you do ♪
♪ I know that I can always be myself ♪
♪ I love you more than anybody else ♪
♪ And every day as I'm heading off to school ♪
♪ You know there's no one I love as much as you ♪
♪ Family, a family ♪
♪ Proud Family ♪
♪ They'll make you scream ♪
( doorbell rings )
♪ They'll make you want to sing ♪
♪ It's a family thing, a family ♪
♪ Proud, Proud Family ♪
♪ The Proud Family ♪
♪ They'll push your buttons ♪
♪ And make you want to hug them ♪
♪ Family, a family, ♪ Proud, Proud Family. ♪
BOY: Yo, this is Sticky Webb
with the next episode of The Racer's Edge.
Today's hot topic:
Is it true that homie-ism has infected
the Willie T. Ribbs Middle School tryouts?
♪ If you're not a winner, you better go home ♪
♪ 'Cause I'm Penny Proud, I'm cute and I'm loud ♪
♪ And I got it going on. ♪
What she's really trying to say is
"If you're not a friend of Dijonay
you'd best be on your way."
That's my girl.
And I think we got a wi--
Is this the tryouts for the Racers?
Sorry, but the tryouts are...
Are the tryouts still open?
Yeah, girl, come on.
Who was that?
We go back all the way to the sandbox.
But you just said I was the winner.
No. I said, we had "a wi--."
Relax, you're in.
I'm just doing an old friend a favor.
She's not going to beat you.
Racers to the left.
Racers to the right.
Racers up the middle.
Fight, fight, fight.
She's worse than me.
See? You have nothing to worry about.
Let's do this for real.
( techno song plays )
♪ Are you ready? ♪
( song ends )
( cheering )
( whispering )
This is Sticky Webb at the cheerleader tryouts.
The votes have been counted, recounted and counted again.
And we still don't have a winner.
Is this any kind of way to pick a cheerleader?
It's certainly not the way
you pick your friend.
Relax, Penny. You were great.
And besides, no one is tighter than you and Dijonay.
You're a shoo-in.
LACIENEGA: She's right, you know?
You were great. I was terrible.
Are you kidding? You were fantastic!
I've never seen moves like that before.
There's no way you're not going to...
Uh... I-I think I hear
somebody calling me.
I hate to admit it
but tree girl has got a point.
You think so?
I know so
Ms "I'm cute, I'm loud, I'm Penny Pathetic"!
Oh, you were good...
if you were trying out for the circus freak show.
And the jury's back, with the decision.
All right, ladies...
and Michael, we have a tie.
Between me and who?
Calm down, ugly boy, and let me finish.
It's between my girl, Penny Proud
and my other girl, Lacienega Boulevardez.
So, who made the squad?
Well, since I am captain, I make the final decision.
And I've decided...
( drumroll )
...to have a cheer-off!
Wow, guess you two aren't that tight
after all, are you?
( cooing )
You need help?
No, I got this.
Stay still, BeBe.
( tires screech )
Honey, get over here! They're here!
Oscar, get away from there.
Those people are going to think we're nosy neighbors.
Trudy, people who move in the middle of the day
want you to be nosy.
so they can show off all their stuff.
And wow, check out the wife.
( clears throat )
I mean, the wide-screen TV.
One of our neighbors sure is ugly.
Good guga muga!
Who are you calling ugly?
Standing there with a face
only a mother could love.
And I don't.
That's cold, Mama.
The truth hurts, boy.
Trudy? I was just next door talking to the family moving in.
I think I just met Caesar Romero.
Mama, Caesar Romero's dead.
Shoot, I know dead when I see it.
Heck, I'm darn near dead myself.
But that man made me feel things I haven't felt since I was...
Mama, please... stop!
Well, Sugar Mama!
Why don't you two try and get together?
We are, tonight. I invited them over for dinner.
The new neighbors.
The Boulevardez Family.
No way. This cannot be.
Penny, what is your problem?
Who are you talking about?
I can't stand her.
Excuse me, young lady?
I'm sorry, Mom
but I'm competing with Lacienega
for the last spot on the cheerleading squad
and she's really mean to me.
Plus, she's acting like she's Dijonay's best friend
and everybody knows Dijonay and I are best friends.
Anyway, it's just not fair.
I told you to ditch that Dijonay a long time ago.
Maybe if you get to know her better
you two just might become good friends.
Well, I know one thing.
We won't be having company with people who have
a bigger TV than ours.
Be right back, honey.
May I leave, too?
No. I'm going to need some help getting dinner ready.
But, Mom, I don't want to...
You're going to help me, and when our guests arrive
you're going to be on your best behavior.
( grunting )
Oscar, what is that?
It's the new, 84-inch Man's Screen 8000, fully equipped
with a satellite dish and pizza-maker.
It's got everything a guy needs to watch TV.
Big deal. You'll still fall asleep on the couch watching it.
I love this thing.
( doorbell ringing )
Penny! Suga Mama!
Okay, I'm coming!
( toilet flushing )
( dog whining )
Oh, stop acting a fool.
Who left this open?
( shrieks )
I'm Trudy Proud, and this is my husband...
owner of Proud Snacks.
Oh, you're the guy.
We use your snacks as landfill.
This is my wife, Sunset, my daughter LaCienega
and my pops, Papi.
TRUDY: And you already know Suga Mama.
( growling )
( speaking Spanish )
Child, I don't know what you said
but you sure put a smile on my face.
I brought Penny a present, Mrs. Proud.
Where is she?
Get your behind down here.
I saw them bring in your big screen.
What is that little beauty, an 80-inch?
Yeah, yeah, it is but...
but this is my daughter's television.
I watch my TV in a home theater.
Want to check it out?
Come in here and fix this thing.
Me and Cesar want to watch wrestling.
( laughing )
So after I pulled him over
I told Felix he had a choice
of walking the line or walking down the aisle.
And he went for that?
I'm a cop and I'm strapped.
Mrs. Proud, this smells so good.
What is it?
So, LaCienega, I hear you and Penny
are trying out for cheerleaders.
I know I'm not going to make it.
Penny is much better than I am.
I'm just honored to be mentioned
in the same breath as Penny.
You have the Ultra Megatron
HDTV with the P-In-P and the DVD.
I'm in L-U-V.
Oh, no, no, no.
Now you're about to fall in love.
( boxing bell rings )
( boxing bell rings )
This is great.
When I want to get away
I tell my wife I'm going on a business trip.
I double back and I kick it right here.
Really? How do you get away with that?
Well, this baby is soundproof.
Nothing gets out, and nothing gets in.
TRUDY: Oscar! Felix! Dinner's ready!
Except my wife.
Felix, it was great meeting you.
We'll have to take that trip
we talked about earlier.
Uh, the camping trip.
You know, the one during the weekend
of the big boxing match.
Oh, yeah. Sure.
So you're coming
to our women's self-defense class
next week, right?
Keep Oscar in his place.
Dinner was delicious, Mrs. Proud,
and your house is beautiful.
Oh, why, thank you, LaCienega.
Hey, Penny, now that we're neighbors
I guess we'll be hanging out together.
That would be... not happening.
That would be fun.
( speaking Spanish )
Ooh, Oscar, your new stepdaddy sure can talk.
I don't understand what you were talking about, Penny.
LaCienega seems like a very nice girl
and she really seemed to like you.
She was playing us, Mom.
Oh, just give her a chance, baby.
She seems to be trying.
Why can't you?
Okay, Mom, I'll try.
because Felix Boulevardez
is the best thing that ever to happened to me
and if you mess that up, I swear I'll...
( clearing throat )
I mean, listen to your mother.
Look, maybe we got off on the wrong foot.
I'm really sorry.
Let's be cool, okay?
Save it, cornball.
I'm already cool by myself
and your house stinks.
Hey, guys, I've saved seats for you.
Penny, why don't you sit with us, too?
I don't think so.
I'd rather sit with the Gross sisters
than sit with you.
Come on, Sticky.
Wait a minute, Penny.
Let's think about this.
The Gross sisters are...
Well, well, they're gross.
What has gotten into that girl?
I don't know.
I was just trying to be nice to her.
Maybe she's not getting enough roughage.
Come on, Penny, don't.
( loud crunching )
You know, you got guts coming over here, but it's cool.
I mean, just because we take your money
doesn't mean we don't have feelings.
Speaking of which....
Uh, why are we paying
to be with people we don't like
when we can be with people we do like for free?
Because I don't like LaCienega.
She's turning my best friend against me.
I wish she would just go away.
She didn't mean that.
That was just a figure of speech.
I do mean it.
I wish I never had to look at her ever again.
As in, you would never want
anything bad to happen to her, right?
I just wish she wasn't around ruining my life.
I can't eat, you guys. I'm out.
I've got to get ready for the cheer off. Woo-woo.
Where you going, three eyes?
I like that big-head girl.
You know, we ought to help her out
and I got an idea.
Oscar, where are you going?
Camping with Felix.
We're going to do that male bonding thing.
So what is this for?
You're taking a TV schedule for reading?
Oh, I don't read it, I just look at the pictures.
Tell her, Mama.
Oh, yeah, the boy's simple.
Well, I got to run.
I'm going to miss the big bout--
I mean, uh, going to fish for the big trout. Bye.
( cooing )
No, you can't go with Daddy.
When I get back
I'll take you fishing in the sink.
( giggling )
Come on, babies.
Let's go play with your daddy's new TV.
What's the long face for?
I'm going to make the cheerleading squad.
Oh, why not? What happened?
Dijonay, my so-called best friend
is selling me out for LaCienega.
Stop all that whining, girl.
Your name is Proud, not Punk.
Now, if you want to win that cheerleading thing
you need a gimmick.
You know anything about twirling?
Just watch what I do with my cane.
A few moves like this
and I guarantee you'll win.
The trick is to never...
( plunk )
drop your baton.
Get up, Puff, and find my cane.
you better check your girls.
The Gross Sisters are straight trippin'.
What are you talking about, Sticky?
The Gross Sisters.
The three big ashy girls.
They're going to ruin LaCienega's cheer.
No, not good.
They're going to straight jack her.
And it's all because of you.
Me? I didn't tell them to do anything.
But they think you did.
And you're the only one that can squash this.
Please, they just talking mess.
Well, peep this.
I programmed my pager to pick up a signal
from the government spy satellite.
Because I got it like that.
What are they going to do?
They're going to make LaCienega look fly...
but it's not going to be pretty
if you know what I mean.
What are you talking about, Sticky?
The Gross Sisters turned the entire stage into a giant CD
and when they hit play
I believe LaCienega's going to be singing
"I Believe I Can Fly."
The Gross Sisters did this by themselves?
Are you kidding?
I'm the one who came up with the flying dish idea.
Do you know how long it took me to calculate
the critical velocities...
Look, Penny, the Gross Sisters
held me captive for the past two days.
You have no idea
what they did to me in there.
I'll never be the same.
But forget about me.
You got to stop this madness
before LaCienega lands on La Luna.
Well, it's all taken care of, Penny.
LaCienega won't be saying any cheers today.
You guys, what are you doing?
We just helping you out.
You got me all wrong.
I would never do something like this.
Of course you wouldn't.
This is what we do.
All we have to do is pull this lever
and LaCienega's cheerleading career
will be la history.
Ooh, that's really cool.
I mean, no.
I can't let you do this.
And how do you plan on stopping us?
There it is.
What are we going to do now?
LaCienega, watch out!
No, my scooter!
Get off the stage, LaCienega.
Back up. Wait your turn.
If you don't get off the stage
you're going to be the first cheerleader in outer space.
Are you threatening me, Proud?
I said get off!
Wow, I didn't think it would go that high.
ANNOUNCER: Introducing this year's Willy T. Ribs-- Sparkplugs.
Go Ribs' Racers!
Go Ribs' Racers!
Well, Proud, I guess I really owe you a big thank you
for taking that little spin for me.
It's the least you can do.
Sorry, can't do it.
Ow, ow, ow, ow.
That was not right.
She did not have to go there.
Oh, now you get it.
I'm sorry, Penny.
I didn't know she was like that.
The LaCienega I knew was a very nice person
someone you could depend on
Was four years old.
But you know what, I'm the one who should be apologizing.
I put a lot of pressure on you.
I felt like I was losing my best friend.
You know I got love for you, girl.
You'll always be my best friend.
So we still cool?
Like the other side of the pillow.
( both laugh )
So, Dijonay, let me ask you something.
Sure, girlfriend, anything.
If I wasn't hurt, who would you have picked?
Me or LaCienega?
For real, for real.
For really, really, for real, for real?
( bell rings )
Does it get any better than this, my friend?
No kids, no noise and the best part:
no nagging wife.
Pass the popcorn.
Thank you, Trudy.
Camping trip, huh?
Nagging wife, huh?
Baby, I can explain.
We weren't talking about our nagging wives...
Yeah, we were talking about the nagging wives on TV.
FELIX: Sunset, don't do it.
OSCAR: I can explain.
( Sunset speaking Spanish )
FELIX: Not my TV, please.
No! No! Oh!