Welcome to "Is it a Good Idea to Microwave This?" I'm your host, Jory Caron.
Today, the season 5 finale! It's what you've all been waiting for, I assume. Today, we're gonna be microwaving this can of spray paint. That's right, folks! Movie magic right there! It appeared right before your very eyes!
So, you're looking at this, and you're thinking, "Spray paint is to regular paint as the microwave is to an oven? So, I think that means that spray paint is a really good idea to put into a microwave!
Aw, man, I love Venn diagrams!
Isn't that the transitive property?
I think it's long division.
Math is so much fun!
My head hurts!
Jory: Is it a good idea to microwave this?
Let's find out! Here at the Jory Caron Backyard, safety... Yeah!
Jon: You can't even finish the sentence!
There's so little of that statement that I can still use! We don't have a tin foil shield, ventilation is just the breeze, and goggles? Well, I have goggles, but a mask? I mean, they do nothing anyways, right? I mean, they do NOTHING!
*hissing spray paint*
Jory: This is our laboratory right here! You see Whoopi right over there. Whoopi looks beautiful today, doesn't she? Look how the sun just shines right off of her!
Jory: And we also have this giant pile of wood. It's to protect our wood! Because nobody likes...
Riley: Interruptions! Sorry...
Okay!
Jon: (laughs) Ah, no one likes wood! Alright, let's put the spray paint inside Whoopi!
Jory: Oh, there we go!
Jon: Oh, yeah, that's not dangerous-looking at all!
Jory: It's okay, though, because I have this little strap here to protect us.
Riley: Whoopi likes strap-ons! Premium Decor! (in falsetto) Whoopi!
Jon: Yeah, so leave it a little loose, so the door can still fly open a little bit!
So, how long should I put it in there for?
Jon: We have about 24 minutes left of tape, so 24 minutes sounds good! Alright, Jory, you stay there, get ready on the clock!
Jory: Yeah, sure, why not? I'll just stay here the whole time! I'll go like this, to see if it's working! Is it working?
Jory: Evacuate!
Jon: Quick! Get outta the way!
Riley: Something's already happening! I'm already hearing noises!
Jory: Me, too!
Jon: Uh-oh! Alright, let's hide! Let's hide! I'm hiding, I'm hiding!
Jory: What the hell is going on?! [Beep]!
Jon: (laughs) That does not sound good!
Jory: That kind of sounds like the spray paint coming out but not exploding.
Jon: Will it explode?
If it finds a spark!
That smell!
Jon: It doesn't smell too good, guys! Uh, wanna go investigate?
No!
Not really!
I'm willing to let this run down all the way!
Riley: The light turned off! The microwave turned off. I'm gonna go in for a closer look!
Jon: Oh, yeah, you just go ahead and do that!
Riley: There's still power to it.
Jon: Oh, yeah, just keep touching it! [Beep]!
Riley: No, there's still power to it, but the time stopped. I think the microwave itself stopped.
He's doing this so I don't have to!
I'm so proud I get to do this!
Meat shield, brought to you by McIlwain!
Jon: (laughs) RUN!
Jory: Did it sound like it was working when you started it up again?
Riley: (laughs) You want me to go check? I'm gonna go check!
Jory: I think it turned off again.
Riley: Yeah, I think it did, too.
Jon: What's goin' on with it?
I don't know, but we might have to use a different microwave!
Jon: We've never done a two-microwave experiment!
Jory: Unplug it! Unplug it! Go!
Jon: Alright, it's unplugged. Alright, we're taking the tie-wrap off. What the [beep]?!
Jory: That is one firm bottle!
Riley: Oh, so the pressure built up, but it never released, though.
Jory: Yeah, there's pressure coming out of the top a little bit. Let's use a different microwave... So, as an update, guys, this microwave kept turning off. We might wanna stick some tin foil in there, just to get it to spark.
Riley: Ooh! Popcorn, beverage, pizza!
Jon: Jory, what've you got there?
Jory: It's a ball of tin foil. I'm gonna add this in there, just to make sure something...
Jon: That's a big ball of tin foil! Are you sure that's not overkill? (laughs) It doesn't fit!
Riley: That's not the first time I've heard THAT one before!
Jon: Hey! It fits!
Jory: A ball of tin foil, to make sure it has a spark!
Jon: Alright, Jory, this is all well and good, but this microwave doesn't have a name, now, does it?
Riley: How 'bout "Worthless Bitch," 'cause she's cold?
Lexi!
Jon and Riley: Lexi?!
I don't know! GE... Juh, juh...
Jon: Jasmine!
Jasmine!
Riley: Jasmine with a "J" or Jasmine with a "G"?
Jon: With a "J"!
Like, I don't know- like "Aladdin" Jasmine! She was, like, easily, the hottest Disney one!
Jon: Aw, yeah! Let's do Jasmine!
Jory: Jasmine! Let's DO Jasmine! Okay, so... (to Riley) You just cracked the plate!
Jon: Nice goin', asshole!
Jon: 15 minutes- go for it!
Riley: Oh, it's sparking!
Jon: The tin foil's doin' somethin'.
Jory: That is horrifying!
Jon: Uh... I fear for my life...
Jory: That is absolutely terrifying! I think we should light all experiments with a ball of tin foil! Look at that! You can smell it already.
Jon: Oh, it's wafting over this way! Nothin' like breathing in cancer on a cold winter's day! And you can see the smoke, too, 'cause it's so cold out. Alright, 14 minutes left.
Jory: Almost like this can when it takes off!
Riley: Oh! It's sparking OUT of the microwave! Look it! Look at below the microwave- it's sparking out!
Jon: Jesus Christ! Oh, no!
Riley: It burnt a hole throught the microwave! Microwave fail!
Jory: Holy [beep]! Holy [beep]!
Jon: A trash barrel on fire in about ten minutes! I hope you didn't like that trash barrel, Dad!
Jon: Was it?
Jon: Is it getting brighter?!
Riley: I think it is!
Jon: Holy [beep]! Oh! It's gonna flame up!
Jon's dad: The front panel's getting all distorted.
Jory: Oh, [beep]!
Jon: We've never buckled the door on the first experiment!
Jory: Lexi is a freak!
Jon: Uh, her name's "Jasmine"!
Riley: (laughs) You do that all the time!
Jon: He goes through so many of them!
Jory: How are sparks [beep]ing shooting out the bottom?! They still are! (singing "Whole New World") "Dazzling place I never knew!"
Jon: It's still going! I've never seen anything spark this long!
Riley: Yeah, the door isn't flat anymore. OH!
Jon: Uh-oh! This is it, Jory!
Jory: The door would not open, though.
Jon: This is it! The door's gonna burst!
Jory: Oh, [beep]! This microwave is not dying! That's when the microwave died! Right there!
Riley: Aw, come on! I wanted to see it explode!
Jon: It's [beep]in' close, though, dude!
Jory: Holy [beep]! We're lucky that door didn't open!
Jon: That's literally a box of propane!
Jory: Oh, my God! Now, it just doesn't have the fan blowing air into it.
Jon: Oh, shoot! Uh-oh!
Jory: (laughs) It's burning away!
Jon: Oh, my God!
Jory: Now, it's probably just catching the exterior on fire.
Jon: Alright, we should get a shovel and just throw snow at it!
Riley: Safety is our number-one concern!
Jon: (laughs) Aw, man! Look at the snow comin' off of that thing!
Jory: I think I'm just pissing it off! I think the microwave's now on fire... I'm gonna tip it over...
Riley: It's like a Transformer just came out of nowhere and landed in your backyard!
Jon: Whoa, whoa, guys! Take a look at the trash barrel here! It just melted!
Riley: Oh, my God!
Jon: It [beep]in' melted the trash barrel! Good work! Alright, open her up! Open her up! Holy [beep]! Did you see that?!
Riley: It burnt holes through the bottom!
Jon: It literally burnt a hole through the bottom of Jasmine! Wow!
Riley: It melted it! Look it- it melted it!
Jon: WOW!
Jory: Holy [beep]!
Jon: The microwave melted ITSELF! I didn't think anything could get that hot! Alright, throw some snow in there! Wow! Do you see the smoke comin' off here? Unbelievable! Just bury it, just completely bury it! We'll come back in the spring!
Jory: That thing got punished, and it kept going! It was on fire, and it was STILL going!
Jon: It's too bad! She definitely went out before her time. We [beep]in' wrecked her, though! It's just totally packed in there now!
Jory: Sparks were shooting from the bottom of the microwave, melted a hole through the microwave!
Jon: That's never a good thing!
Jory: No, it's a GREAT thing! You may be thinking, "Bad idea to microwave spray paint," right? At home, you're right- bad idea! Beautiful, beautiful television, folks!
Jon: That was fantastic! I was not expecting a melted trash barrel!
Jory: That microwave burnt a hole through itself, and was, like, "Nah! Keep goin'!" Jasmine? I'm officially saying Jasmine was a zombie!
You can shoot it in any part of the body, but as long as you don't hit the head... Jesus Christ! Good idea! That's it for season 5!
I hope to see you guys in season 6. Hopefully, every episode in season 6 is kinda like that! If it is, we're gonna go through a LOT of microwaves! So, stay tuned, guys, for other stuff coming out. See you guys later!
*end credits play*
*funeral montage music plays*
Jory: And new, for this episodes and the ones after this... Hopefully! We have this new microwave, the Panasonic. I've named her Whoopi!
Jon: Whoopi!
GE... Juh, juh...
Jon: Jasmine!
Jasmine!
Jory: Lexi is a freak!
Jon: Uh, her name's "Jasmine"!
Riley: (laughs) You do that all the time!
*funeral montage music ends*
This product contains chemicals known to the state of California to cause cancer and birth defects...
Jon: Good thing we're in Massachusetts, asshole!
Yeah, you have to make it really fast! (laughs)
*Jory and Riley laugh*
Jory: This door should definitely be sold on eBay!
Okay, we're done!
*Jory blows raspberry*
