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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Plague Inc Evolved but I enjoy spreading disease too much

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What the hell? Does my computer have the virus?

What is up with the graphics?

Let's try and fix this if I can read it... Jesus Christ.

What is going on?

Ah! That's better! Thank you!

All right, hey there friends. How's it going?

My name is Kevin. And today we're playing Plague Inc Evolved.

We're gonna make some viruses and send them around the world!

Name your plague.... [sigh]

It's called FeckingFlu.

I'm a new bacteria. "To win, you must evolve and spread around the world, wiping out all humans in the ultimate Plague!"

This sounds like the game for me!

"Select a country to begin your plague." Well, we gotta pick Ireland, don't we?

Hey, hey, Ireland is NOT in the UK!

All right, we got Patient 0 out here in Galway by the looks of it..?

Oh, he's passed it on, he shook someone's hand.

Medicine in the UK is slowing infection, goddamnit! Like it doesn't even do anything.

It's symptoms are nothing. I'll make it resistant to antibiotics. There you go!

Wait... "Politicians have confirmed that political shortsightedness

and self-interest may result in a total breakdown of the Euro."

Goddamn it, guys. What did you do?

Like don't you realize FeckingFlu is coming for you guys?

Alright, now it's spreading more, now that I've made it so sneezing spreads the Feck

[sneezes]

Feck, I think I just got it.

You know, they call it the FeckingFlu specifically for that reason.

because you sneeze and then you go, "Ah, feck!"

Yeah, it's spreading like wildfire, now that I put that in.

Time speed up some time, get a lot of people infected.

[In-feck-ted?]

[In-FECK-ted?]

[Is anyone laughing? Please laugh, if one person laughs, eveyone will.]

[Laughter is in-FECK-tious.]

Oh my God, look how fast it's infecting people now! It's spreading so rapidly!

I'm not even making it deadly yet, I just want to spread it.

[in-game coughs]

Ah yes, listen to that glorious coughing.

"FeckingFlu has mutated and developed the Amnosia symptom without using DNA points."

Oh Jesus!

Oh my god, it's going everywhere now.

Ah! Ah!

It's spreading, I'm trying to collect all this bonus DNA.

Oh god, they found it. It appears to be mostly harmless, they're saying...

We'll see about that.

They're looking for a cure.

Oh goddamnit, ok. Let's start evolving this disease.

Look at this, 50 million people have it! Nearly the whole country has it!

I'm just making it super resistant, it doesn't actually do anything.

Yeah!

It's just really resistant.

"The Olympics will begin soon despite FeckingFlu. Will people bring the disease to Brazil?"

"People infected with FeckingFlu came to Rio and spread their disease."

Ah goddamnit!

They're using air filters in the planes. All right, give it to rats. What did they do to deserve this?

"USA president taken ill"? "The president is ill with FeckingFlu. It is uncertain whether the president can remain in power."

Like all it is is sneezing at the moment, you get a bit of a sneeze in the coffin and It just won't feck off!

Oh my god, the USA is really boiling over, God their borders are holding strong aren't they? Like look at China over there!

Let's give it some bite now... "internal haemorrhaging."

Yeah, give FeckingFlu that. God, it went from a sneeze to a haemorrage really fast.

"First death from FeckingFlu has been confirmed."

"Canada has become the first country to try and limit the spread of FeckingFlu by limiting access into and out of the country."

"Time will tell if this will work." Fucking look at you, Canada! You're destroyed already! Look at their population!

It's too little, too late!

It has killed over 300 million people worldwide. "Normal life in Canada starting to slow down."

Fifteen-million people have died, nearly half their population.

I need to make it more catchy, like a catchy tune, you just can't get it out of your head.

And it burns, burns, burns... ( Like a ring of fire ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) )

Give it to pigeons... and dust. Oh God, they've got a cure, 50% complete!

I gotta make it more resilient, They're trying to cure it...

Africa's holding up well to this, you gotta give it to them.

75% complete, we got to stop it, for the good of mankind!

Notice I said mankind is in me. I'm the man not menkind new strain, oh that's gonna piss him off.

God they're executing infected people now. Anyone who sneezes is gonna get the chopping block.

Well feck. (Kevin, don't die on us.)

God, damn it. They're curing the damn thing. I mean fair play, It was resilient, like everyone in Europe is dead.

Including me I guess since I'm here. Asia is taking a massive hit, ohh the Cure has been developed.

How are they gonna deploy that? FeckingFlu to be eradicated.

I'm thoroughly disappointed. Like it's still mutating, FeckingFlu has been eradicated. ;-;

Well feckin hell. Share the news, Oh, I can email it to someone.

To, Support@shoploganpaul.com... Aand send.

I hope he emails me back. All right, let's do this one the STD Scenario.

Make it Bore Ragnarok since that seems to be super contagious. (You'll never stop us Kevin)

All right. I want this one to start in Iceland, that place seems romantic. "Into the Nether-Regions, causes increased sexual impulses."

Yeah, go for it. Bore Ragnarok has that effect on people. Alright, good Iceland are going at it.

Look at that! "Infected would move mountains to be with the one they want."

Yeah, I feel like people would move mountains to give each other Bore Ragnarok.

It sure as hell seems like it in the comments anyway!

"My place is close by, infected are much less hesitant about bringing strangers home." For some reason. Yeah, go for it.

In fact, give me all of these just make it really spreadable like a nice butter. Wait. Yolo. Yeah. Give it Yolo.

"Makes infected existential and pursu desires."

Yolo am I right, as that thing is sitting on your brain. "Bore Ragnarok is mutated and developed the 69% dirty-minded symptom!"

I always kind of knew it would reach this stage.

"Spread trojan planes, pop the bubble and click the country you want people to travel to." Okay.

Yeah, for some reason it has this effect, that it encourages people to go to different countries, you know what, go to South Africa.

I figure, it'll spread upwards and then downwards. Oh, gross it mutated, to get the love symptom! Gah, that's disgusting.

There we go, South Africa's infected. Now hopefully that can make its way up.

This can make its way down, and they'll meet in the middle.

"Conservative groups fight to ban and demonize online pornography and sexual content in media and Argentina and succeed."

"Causing more people to satisfy their urges with others and spread the plague."

Jesus, Bore Ragnarok gets around doesn't it? I'd like to think all these planes I'm sending around or just long distance relationships.

I'm like Cupid, except... Spreading diseases along with love.

I'm giving it so much stuff now. "Nerds need love too, test subjects under observation proved to be more -

Distracting than scientists were prepared for," god damn. It's popping up everywhere!

I'm trying to send it to - (Slightly forgets what he's saying)

Different countries all the time. and just spread it as much as possible. Because once it gets a hold it seems to just take over a -

Country or a comment section, you know Bore Ragnarok. I'm just making it super resistant to everything as well.

Oh my god, this is going mad. They're like bunnies. Alright, we actually have to make it dangerous now,

It's not dangerous at all at the moment. "Kinkyness has taken to new heights as increased risk-taking behavior makes sexual -

Encounters ever more dangerous." Yeah get that one! God, that thing is looking pretty nasty -

now, not that it looked okay before but it's looking really bad. ( RIP Comedy Night )

Argentina is first to instruct doctors to begin research, only now they're starting to research it?!

Oh my god, look at that and people are dying, how are they dying? Is it from being too kinky?

A lot of way to go is it not in any countries yet? I don't think it's here. Damn it Egypt

Why are you trying to cure Bore Ragnarok? I've tried, nothing can stop it! Has anywhere got no one infected yet?

We got a few justm oh Madagascar doesn't. South Africa is really holding up -

well, like they were the second to be infected. "Or is it just me? -

"Infected heat tolerance decreases causing them to wear skimpier outfits!" Go for it! ( Kevin, no. )

I'll get the second one too, I wanted to spread in the heat, the heat is where I'm struggling the most. It's 50% -

complete like how are they doing this? God, It's really taking control of the brain -

now. "Normal life in Brazil is beginning to break down due to Bore Ragnarok, cure research is starting to slow."

It's almost there Bore Ragnarok is almost taken over the world! :D

It's amazing because I think the only way to die is from becoming kinky, and dying in an accident or something.

But like the population doesn't seem to be increasing anywhere!

Which you'd think it would!

"There are no healthy people left in the world, the last healthy person on the planet recently became infected with Bore Ragnarok."

I think it was in the Caribbean if you're interested.

And now people begin to die! "Bore Ragnarok has mutated and developed the high functioning sociopath symptom!"

That actually sounds about right, like it seems like it just makes everyone go insane -

It doesn't really kill that much, at least the disease doesn't it makes their actions kill I suppose. At this point like everyone's infected -

I'm just choosing where people go on holiday. "The Cure is finished and being deployed worldwide." God they spread that woul- cure fast!

It killed almost six million people who knew Bore Ragnarok was so dangerous?

"Defeat Bore Ragnarok has been eradicated" ( The last person to subtitle this said "Boring Rock"... I am deeply offended"

We all know that will never happen! Alright last scenario, crippling depression. Let's go. "Name your plague" De -

monetization. I won't stop till the whole world is demonetized just like what happens to me! ( And me! )

It's like the worst villain ever. We live in a monetized society. ( Kevin for next Joker, DC hit him up )

Fecking terrible. Do you want to know how I got demonetized? My dad was that drunk! ( O O F )

All right, let's actually play. Depression illness detected." This is gonna get really dark. I'm half regretting this already.

Wait, who was the first to get demonetized, think was like Isis videos? ( Actually there were video's in 2013 and 2014 where they got demonetized for showing milk )

Oh god damn it, I put it in Saudi Arabia by accident. Alright, well, it's there now.

I'm gonna go with genetic swap. I want this one to be hard to cure! And I think I'll give it the -

ADHD which encourages host of fly to a target country again, that was handy. Man when I listen to what I say, it sounds very weird.

"You have successfully evolved demonetization" pretty sure this video will evolve demonetization, It just looks like they could get really bad.

Alright, first of all, I want to get that plane thing. I want it to travel -

I want it to be a well traveled virus. Make everyone pessimists too, make them more aware of sad or otherwise -

Unpleasant things. The next one will be "The host starts doing drugs that are not that dangerous."

No, I want them on to like meth immediately. I think that would be a bit extreme -

They get a bit sad they turn to meth.

Yes. ( Very short subtitle for this 0.7 second frame so here's some text to fill it in. )

Drug use two will be next or I don't know actually, should I make it that severe? Because I want it to spread before they -

start dying. Yeah, we'll focus on making it more resilient first actually. My first death from demonetization has been confirmed. D:

Oh no. Oh my god, It's spreading fast, one person coughed and it just went everywhere!

I'm just gonna get all the resistant things gone go to the states. That's where the monetization will strike the best

Oh god, damn it. They're already starting to try and cure demonetization! ( How fecking dare they? )

Well, if it's just YouTube trying to deal with it, it'll take a long time. "Demonetization. just another parasite."

Scientists sell public not to worry about the monetization although unpleasant

It does not appear to cause any symptoms in humans and will be easily cured. Oh, that's what they thought when it first started!

They were like the advertisers will come back, don't worry. Oh my god, It's popping up everywhere jesus -

You can't control that demonetization, what videos are you guys uploading? ( You are too innocent to know that Kevin )

I want to make multiple strains and then we can go on to make it a worse disease.

God, demonetization is the catchiest thing I've made yet. Oh my god, Stop, Stop! demonetization you're out of control! Stop, stop!

This is how I feel like they act at the YouTube HQ. Alright, it's fully evolved to make it hard to cure.

Alright now make them use harder drugs. "Demonetization has killed over 75 million people." ( I just realised demonetization has the word 'demon' in it )

Jesus Christ YouTube, you need to stop this madness!

Okay, make them fake happiness "host is unable to talk to others and feels alone" Jesus Christ. This is a horrible disease.

It has killed over 300 million people. Will it even be able to travel at that rate?

'"Middle East is first to fall into anarchy due to demonetization."

Ah yeah, make it harder to cure with insanity.

Self-hatred. Oh wait, they're eating into the Cure. It's spreading huh? Stop! Hold on!

It's hard to keep on top of this. "In an attempt to slow demonetization, Norway has bombed areas with high infection." Norway -

I don't think that's how we fix demonetization! This video is becoming a bit too meta.

I feel like this is gonna get demonetized for sure and it's just - it's going too deep.

Like how are they still trying to cure this everyone's nearly dead surely!

Look at this you get infected and if you just die people are dying faster than they get infected!

That's the only problem with it. Well, actually, I don't know what's a problem anymore!

Oh, that's what we need, "Corpse feeder worms drawn to corpses increased infectivity when corpse is present."

I'm just gonna get all these things to spread it.

I'm not even looking what I'm getting just spread the damn thing. "Demonetization killed all its hosts some healthy people survived!"

Jesus Christ, I actually felt bad for that one like think of all the youtubers lost.

That's the first plague I had that literally just killed people so fast that I couldn't spread I should have made it more -

infectious early on rather than keep making it more and more deadly and that's how it ended. Australia got off pretty well! ( Hell yeah! My country! )

Maybe they just don't like YouTube very much. ( We love YouTube, except KSI vs Logan, that stuff was Bore Ragnarok )

Understandable. I mean this is the kind of content you get I can understand. Should I, tell Logan Paul about it?

I could tweet Adam

There we go @ Logan Paul demonetization just lost the crippling depression scenario in plague inc. Tweet all done.

I hope he responds. Alright, well, I think that's where we're gonna end it here.

I hope you don't catch any of these viruses wouldn't want you to get FeckingFlu, Bore Ragnarok or -

definitely not demonetization, but I hope you enjoyed ridding the world of its population with me, and I'll see you next time!

Appreciated as always folks. Bye for now. Shout out to Patreon patrons, Gary Tollefson, Harley Peterson, Paley gavel Adhan. I love Becky Alina Maria powers

I'm fat Jesus, Jack Toland, Jack prim, Jeremy deep a plaque, Jessie Walter,

Just people's Javon Grimshaw Holden, Joe Lee Phillips, Jordan piece of Paris, Jordan Simmons. Joseph Zaldivar,

Joshua plank Pat Oh, judge buildings, Julian Powell Jonas sigurðsson Caffrey Gaytan

Lucy Ella inugami, Lucy Malone, more a judge, megaron still green and Matt berry.

The Description of Plague Inc Evolved but I enjoy spreading disease too much