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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Never Steady Never Still

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(Whistling in distance)

(Whistling in distance)

WOMAN 1: (Narrating) My first child died inside me, inside my swollen womb.

The doctor said it was her heart,

it wasn't growing like it should've.

My mom said to me then that death is not cruel,

death is a gift from God, just as life is.

I told mom I wasn't so sure about God.

And then there was Ed,

the still babe held tight to his chest,

he looked thin and pale as the underside of a leaf.

And I knew then that it must have been my heart

that could not fill her heart properly,

'cause I can see her tiny fist between the folds of the cloth

and I know she was anything but weak.


WOMAN 2: Okay, let's give the legs a little break

and work on our upper body.

Stretch your hands up as wide as you can up to the sky,

prayer hands and snowflakes coming down,

snowflakes coming down, snowflakes coming down.

And one more time reach up as high as you can.

Reach, reach, reach and snowflakes coming down.

Oh, beautiful, beautiful.

One more time, one more time, feels so good.

Reach up prayer hands and then snowflakes coming down.

Oh, good, good, good.

Okay, imagine you have a giant ball in your hand.

Reach to the side and to the other side

and get your ribcage involved and scoop way up with one hand

and reach beautiful.

Just majestically, you're a ballerina dancer.

Yes, reaching, reaching, reaching.

Really good.


WOMAN 1: You want some tea, dear? -Say what?

You want some tea, dear?

Yeah, I'd love some, thank you.

Oh, here.

Got it.

- Here. - Yes.


Guess I got a little drinking problem.

I spoke to Don today.

Yeah, and?

Yeah, they need young guys.

I was afraid they might.

It'll be good for him.

He's gotta grow up sometime, look after himself.

Least he'll have money in his jeans.

(Revving in distance)

I kinda like brushed one with my hand,

like this, but I didn't like

stick my finger up in it or anything.

MAN 1: Yeah, it's like a cave or somethin' up there.

Like a fish mouth.

But it was good, right?

It felt good?

MAN 1: Yeah.

Get you kinda hard and shit?

I guess, ya.

MAN 2: Makes me hard just thinkin' about it.

Yeah, I don't know.

Like I-- I like to fuck and shit, you know?



Who did you fuck?


Yeah, right?

Fuck Laura.

Yeah, right?

MAN 1: I did!

MAN 2: Shut up.

Okay, I like to fuck for sure, you know?

For sure, for sure.

It's just all that other stuff.

(Wind howling)

(Dog barking in distance)

(TV in distance)


(TV in distance)

Come here for a sec.

ED: Sure.

- Do ya up? - Yeah.


Okay, here.

- Okay? - Yeah.

(TV in distance)

ED: Here we go.


You're gonna go in and see Don Camdon today, right?

MAN 2: Maybe.

Maybe, what do you mean maybe?

I mean I'm busy is what I mean.

Well, you don't look busy.

Look clearly I've got shit to do, okay?

Well, here's the thing,

I told Don that you're coming in today.


You could see if they need help at the auto shop you know,

if you like instead.

Yeah, you know, just talk to Glen.

I don't wanna talk to Glen, mom.

It's not a life sentence, Jamie.

It's a job.

Wash your bowl please.

(Indistinct chatter in distance)

DON: Jamie?

Come on in, son.

18, you say?

You ready to find some hair on that chest, are ya?

Worked on a drilling rig before?


DON: A camp, logging camp, something?

I worked at the mill for a while.

DON: Oh yeah, what happened there?

What do you mean?

Well, you don't work there anymore.

No one does.

DON: But you only worked there for a month.


I kinda uh, I kinda messed up the forklift.

You scared of heights?

Don't think so.

Don't think so?

I guess I've not done a lot of climbing.

Not as a kid, climbing trees and that?

Yeah, I guess I did that.

DON: So were you scared then?


DON: Alright then.

Where do you see yourself in five years?

On the lease?

DON: Doin' what kid?

Think about where you're gonna excel.

Maybe it could be a tool push.

Is that right?

(Sighs deeply)

DON: We got your piss already, didn't we?

Squeaky clean, are ya?

Criminal record?


(Dog barking in distance)

(Breathing heavily)

MAN 1: So you movin' out there?

Guess so, yeah.

MAN 1: When are you going?

Couple weeks, I don't know.

MAN 1: Give me a smoke.

I don't know.

MAN 1: What?

(Jamie coughs)

It's you I'm worried about.

MAN 1: Why's that?

You're gonna turn into some fucking hipster-shit asshole

or something.


What am I supposed to do, stay here?

JAMIE: You could blow me.

MAN 1: Even your jokes don't make fuckin' sense.

Fuck that.

(Tapping in distance)


What are you doing?

I'm cleaning the oven dear.

JAMIE: Oh, okay.

JAMIE'S MOM: You're up early.

(Tapping continues)

WOMAN 2: I think you've all experienced this by now,

maybe you're having trouble speaking,

people tell you to speak up, ask you to repeat yourself.

As your voice is getting softer,

the words just don't come as easy now.

- Right? - Yeah.

WOMAN 2: Yeah, I'm seeing some nods here.

Okay, so today we're gonna imagine

all those people leaning in

and saying "Speak up, speak up, speak up!"

We're gonna imagine punching them in the face

with our voice, okay?

So sit up nice and straight and as loud as we can.

All together now,

1, 2, 3...


(Old man coughs)

WOMAN 2: Good, I think I was Nadine was the loudest that time.

Good, now push the air out with your tummy,


Right in there, okay?


Knock 'em out.

Okay, we're gonna go again.

1, 2, 3...

(Jamie humming)

(Birds and crickets chirping)

(Birds chirping)


(Birds squawking)

15-2, 15-4, there ain't no more.


ED: Four.

3, 6, 8, 10, and a pair is 12.

Oh boy, this stuff is strong, Len.

Care for a refill?

ED: She's had enough.

I haven't even finished yet.

ED: Okay, I got nothin'.

Your deal, ma'am.

Oh yeah, okay.

- ED: Want me to do it? - JUDY: Yeah.

So, Eileen, she's been around lately?


Then good thing you didn't marry that one

is all I'd say.

ED: Boy.

Well, I married her alright.

ED: Oh Christ.

Oh Lenny, you did not!

ED: He did.

Uh, she always wanted to get it done in the summer

and I said, "Heck, let's just head on down in Kamloops

and get it done.

She gonna divorce you, that's gonna be the question.

You got that, right?

3, 6, oh.

Quit lookin' at my cards.

Quit floppin' em all over the place.

ED: Okay.

Okay, let's see, let's see.


LENNY: 15 for two.

JUDY: Shoot, 23.


What'd you say, 23 is a go?

LENNY: 27.


LENNY: And 31 for two

and a pair is four and that is game.

Darnit, darnit.

ED: Unbelievable.


ED: Oh.

-You hear about Bob Duncan? -No, what about Bob Duncan?

Crazy son of a bitch drove hisself out past a point

and did hisself in.


- Shotgun to the head. - Christ.

JUDY: Oh, that's awful.

LENNY: Your EI still going?

Runs out this month.

You got jam on here or something.

Oh, you missed your group today.

- That's tomorrow, Eddy. - Oh.

Barb's picking me up in the morning.

ED: Oh, I'll drive you.

Barb likes to drive.

ED: Well, Barb doesn't like to keep to her side

of the fucking road anymore.

Oh well, I'll keep an eye out.

You'll ruin the deck, Bug.

Yeah, I think I'll head into the fort,

see who's keeping my stool warm.

JUDY: Maybe you oughta drive him, Eddy.

LENNY: No, no, I'll be fine, kiddo.

As long as you didn't tow my truck.

Hey, you guys say hey to the kid for me.

Yeah, you behave yourself out there.

LENNY: Oh yeah.

ED: Right on.

Poor Bob.

Rosario killed it last night, hey?


I said Rosario killed it last night, hey?

She was brutal, took his eyes you know,

right through his skull.

I didn't catch it.

What the fuck you mean you didn't catch it?

Were you back at camp jerking off, what?

Were ya?


No, don't even like to give her a little tug.

I just don't see what's the point.

What are you some kind of eunuch

or something?

Of people beating on each other, I mean it just seems pointless.

The point is they make a lot of money.

You know, the guy that he cracked

looked a lot like you actually.

Little more meat on him.

All the same.

- JAMIE: Yeah? - MAN 3: Yeah.

What the fuck are you doing here anyway?

Well, you told me to unload.

- Yeah, at the mud pump. - Yeah.

Back at the fucking entrance, man.

So I'm supposed to hoof this shit from here

all the way over there, ruin my fucking back.

Load it back up get Andy to rip it

around the other side.

He said he had to leave and then you needed them now,

so I mean I'm unloading, but--

MAN 3: But what?

- What? - I'll walk them.

Yeah, you'll fucking walk them.

PHARMACIST: He's upped her dose, eh?


Nightmares might increase.

She keeping you up as it is?

Well, she's giving me a good kick once in a while.

Might have to sleep in the kid's hockey pads.

ED: Not a bad idea.

That'll run ya 575.

Bleedin' me dry here, Margie.

Boy, life is just all wrapped up in itself, innit?

MARGIE: How's that, Ed?

Well, I gotta spend the money I made from the mill

that's maybe killing my wife just to buy the meds

to stop the thing from killing her faster.

(Drops jar)




(Shattering in distance)

(Scream in distance)



What happened, darling?

My finger.

I just need to take my ring off.


ED: Goddamnit.

- Okay. - JUDY: Just be careful, Bug.

ED: Okay, well, if you just stop your wiggling for a second.

JUDY: I'll do my best.

ED: Here I go.

You don't feel that.

(Judy sobbing)

(Phone ringing)

- Hello? - JAMIE: Hey, mom .

Hello you!


You alright?

JAMIE: Yeah, I just thought I'd check in.

JUDY: The bugs eating you alive?

JAMIE: Yeah.

Oh, you sound tired.

ED: Who's he working with?

JUDY: Who are you working with now?

JAMIE: The drilling crew.

JUDY: The drilling crew, yeah.

That's gonna do it.

JUDY: Yeah, well, there is not much to report here.

You wanna talk to your dad?

JAMIE: Okay.

ED: So you still got all your fingers or...

(Jamie laughs)

JAMIE: Yeah.

MAN 4: Come on, let's mix that mud!


Oye, guide that on there.

JAMIE: (Narrating) When I was 14, my dog Nellie caught a porcupine.

I found her under the deck all covered in quills

on her muzzle and all down her throat,

on her tongue.

I called dad out and he grabbed her,

he told me to hold her down

and he started pulling quills out with his pliers.

But Nellie, she's shaking all over,

crying this high-pitched whine

and I can't stand hearing her like that.

I'm not strong enough.

So I let go for just a second

and off she bolts into the woods.

She never came back.

She never came back.



ED: Goddamnit, here we go.

NADINE: Yesterday, I was at Field's getting Harry some socks.

So picture me there in the aisle with all the delicates--

Delicate stuff.

And I see the ones he likes

just on the rack over there to the left

and I think,

"Okay, Nadine, so there they are and they're on sale

so let's get 'em and get outta here."

'Cause here comes Jim Fleury, just come in.

And God knows, I do not want to have to stand here

and talk to him for 20 minutes or half an hour

about the kids and their chicken pox."


But what happens when I try take a step

is nothin', nothin' happens.

So I say to my legs,

"This is not real, you are working just fine,

so move, you goddamn useless things."

But they just stick there, stiff as the char

I still got in my deep freeze since last year.

And then what do you know, here comes Jim

strollin' towards me sayin', "Hi there, Nadine.

Down here gettin' some socks for Harry,

are ya?"

And I wish to God he would just leave me be,

so I can concentrate on movin' my fuckin' feet.

You try throwing your keys on the floor?

What, I should throw my keys?

- OLD MAN: Yeah, yeah. - Why?

OLD MAN: Well, that's what I do.

It wakes me up.

Next time When Jim comes around, I'll throw them at his head.



Hello, I've been thinking lately about

what coulda been different.

Yeah, I know, I know that's not a good way to think.

I know.

But this year will be our 23rd year together,

Eddy and I, and only four without this disease.

That's 18 with, four without.


Yeah, yeah, yeah.


We were together six months when he proposed.

I was so surprised.

I said yes, but then got nervous

'cause I'd lied to him about my age.

He didn't know I was five years older

than I'd said.

So a few days later, I called up and I said,

"Look, you might not wanna marry me.

And he said...


..."Well, why's that?"

And I say, "'Cause I'm actually 33."

He said, "Well, you'd better stick with me then, old bag."

And I said, "Okay, that sounds okay."


JUDY: He knew me then, he knew what to say.


WOMAN 2: And now?

And now...

Sometimes now I feel like wearing--

When they see me, they don't see me,

they see her.

And I get so mad at him.

It's not-- I'm still a woman,

I'm still the same woman.

and I just wonder,

I just wonder if he would've been happier?

Happier, yeah.

NADINE: That's just marriage, honey.

Shakes or not, it's just marriage.


(Boat engine whirring)


(Door opens)

(Door shuts)

JUDY: Hey, hey.

(Dog yelps)

JUDY: Eddy?

(Judy screams)


(Dog barking)


No, no!


(Lenny grunts)

(Dog barking)

LENNY: Judy, kiddo, I'm gonna need you

to call me the ambulance now, okay?

(Dog barking)


JUDY: Hello?

(Breathing heavily)

It's Ed.


JUDY: (Narrating) I used to dream of Jamie being taken,

taken straight out of my body.

Ed would wake me, "You were screaming,

you were asleep and screaming."

That was my medication.

This is different.

It is not a dream.

It's a memory.

It's a memory that won't go away.

Try to think of Ed in the days before,

before any of it.

I am full of memories, I am full of hope,

I am full of regrets.

(Owl hooting)


You wanted to see me, boss?

Yeah, close the door.


Watch where you're going, man.


(Church bell tolling)

(Judy laughing)

JUDY: Would've been bored out of his mind in there.

JAMIE: Could've thrown in a joke or two, right?


(Kettle whistle blowing)

(Whistle blowing continues)

More coffee?

JAMIE: I'll get it.


JUDY: Oh gosh.

It's fine.



Getting a bit fat, eh?

JUDY: He is not.

He is.

Aren't you, buddy?

(Judy mumbling)

(Phone ringing)


MAN 1: Hey man.


MAN 1: How you doing?

JAMIE: I'm fine.

MAN 1: My mom told me.

So just wanted to call and say sorry.

He was a good guy, your dad.

How's the city?

MAN 1: It's cool.

I'm starting school in the fall.

Yeah, that's cool?

What are you gonna take, marine biology?

MAN 1: Fuck no.

I'm taking psychology.

Psychology, that sounds fucking boring man.

Marine biology would've been dope.

You got an apartment down there?

MAN 1: Yeah, it's cramped as shit, though.

Walls are so thin I can hear my folks having sex,

it's disgusting.

Nice, nice.

MAN 1: You doin' okay on the lease?

JAMIE: Yeah, it's cool.

My back is fucking ripped.

MAN 1: Yeah, right.

My boss's breath is like--

It smells like a dog's ass,

like something just crawled in there and died.

MAN 1: What are you smelling his breath for?

'Cause he's always pushing me in my fucking face.

MAN 1: 'Cause you're slackin' off or what?

No, 'cause he's an asshole.

I'm worried he's gonna give me some disease,

like fucking AIDS from his spit landing on me.

You should see the kind of girls he fucks,

it's like--

Oh boy.

MAN 1: So what you can't hack it then?

Nah, I can take it.

MAN 1: No sweat, eh?

No sweat.

Maybe I'll come visit you sometime.

MAN 1: So wait, is your mom alright?

Yeah, I was thinking about getting a cell,

so maybe you could give me a call sometime

and I can help you with your homework and shit.


MAN 1: A lot of fucking help you'd be.

(Hacking wood)

JUDY: How's Danny?

Hot-shit city kid now.

JUDY: Oh, I doubt that.

I keep thinking he must just be out in the bush,

you know?


You want me to stick around?

No, no, no.

You don't have to do that, no.

No, you gotta live your life.

He was so proud of you, workin' so hard.

Saving your money, are ya?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

That's a good boy, that's a good boy.




JAMIE: (Narrating) Because you're a child and an idiot

and because you see in yourself a significance

that is not there, you wait until 2:00 a.m.,

when alone at the tank you get dramatic

and try to punch yourself in the head.

You think of the kid you called a retard in school,

how he blackened his own eye and if you're better

than this place, then why is this place so hard.

(Whirring and chirping in distance)

MAN 5: Some might say that makes it grade A.

MAN 3: No man, that's not grade A,

'cause if you're nutting right away,

that's the fault of pussy.

MAN 5: So it's the fault of the pussy, huh?

MAN 3: Yeah.

It's like that shit you know, you don't wanna be the last.

You won't be busting your nut like in two minutes.

Yeah, well, who said I did that anyway, okay?

I mean I don't know where this guy

is getting his information from?

MAN 3: I'm just sayin it's gotta be a perfect fit.

Like you're not gonna take a bite of fried rice

and then be full all night be satisfied.

No man, you're gonna be hungry again in an hour.

It's the same thing.

You wanna be able to make your money last.

You want to enjoy it, you know.

It's like have a perfect balance.

Like your wife?

Hey, you talk about my fucking wife again,

I'm gonna stick a chain tong so far up your ass

you can choke on your own shit, boy!

Hey, chill man.

No, you chill, man.

I've got the fucking dune coon up my ass

pissin' me off all night, telling me

how to do my fucking job.

Like buddy, I get it,

you guys have oil over there, but this shit's gas.

Don't come over here

and tell me how to do my job, man.

That shit drives me fucking crazy.

I'm serious.

So you gonna remember which way's up tonight, kid?

Hey, be careful, man, he's been working out.

Oh yeah.

Pumping iron, getting stacked.

Better keep your brother on a leash, man,

we got a shift coming on.

MAN 5: Uh, it helps him unwind.

MAN 6: It fucking winds him up more like.

MAN 5: I'll talk to him.

Yo, let's take a walk.


Okay, here you go.


(Judy humming)


(Engine starts)

WOMAN 3: "Now my dears,"

said old Mrs Rabbit one morning,

"You may go into the fields or down the lane,

but don't go into Mr. McGregor's garden.

Your father had an accident there;

And he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor."


(Indistinct chatter in distance)

"If he had not unfortunately run into a gooseberry

and got caught by the large buttons

in his jacket.

It was a blue jacket then with brass buttons.

Quite new.

SHOP GIRL: So that'll be $50.50.


There you go.


JUDY: Afternoon, yeah.

SHOP GIRL: Do you need any help with your bags today?

No, no, I'm fine.

SHOP GIRL: You know we've got a new home delivery service.

If you ever need it.

(Police siren blaring)

POLICEMAN: You're doing quite a bit of swirling back up there.

You had anything to drink today?

JUDY: No sir.

I just need to take my medication.

You got your medicine with you?


Alright ma'am.

I'm gonna ask you to do something, okay.

For your own safety.

I am gonna ask you to stay off the road from now on

unless you've taken all your medicine.

Will you do that for me?


And I don't think you should be drivin'

when you're upset either.

Just take some time

get yourself back on the road.


(Boat engine whirring)

JUDY: Makin' a break for it, are ya?

I've forgotten how to swim.

LENNY: Guess I won't chuck you in then.

(Both laugh)

LENNY: Every year more cabins, more fucking ski-doos.

How'd you like it

if I ski-dooed over your grave eh?

LENNY: Ah shit.

Not too cold you think?

You think he feels cold, Len?

No, I don't think so, Jude.

Sister Mary-Frances could see us now, eh?

Rolling in her grave no doubt.

You know, I think she'd take one look at you

and she'd say,

"Kiddo, how do you stay so tough through all this shit?"

That's what she should say.

You just disappeared.

You missed the funeral.

I'm not a strong man that way, Judy.

Just never been.



(Knock on door)


Nice, thanks.

You alright?


MAN 7: Always feel like a trapped animal out here

in the winter.


Alright, see you in the morning, man.

Oho, hey.

Hey, we don't need much, eh?

Hey, beautiful

What the time is? ♪

Tell me you're my love

I often think of the day

You and I will run away


(Snowmobile whirring)

(Knock on the door)

SHOP GIRL: Hi ma'am.

JUDY: Hello there.

SHOP GIRL: Got your groceries.

JUDY: Ooh, it must be -30!

Quick, come on in.

JUDY: Oh, hey you.

Hey beautiful.

JUDY: You surviving out there?

SHOP GIRL: It's got some bite today.

JUDY: I bet, yeah.

My kettle just boiled.

You stay and have a cup if you like.

SHOP GIRL: Best thing I heard all day.

You live out here on your own?

JUDY: Uh, I just...

SHOP GIRL: It's quiet, it must be nice.

Yeah, here.

You sit for a minute, warm yourself up.

Hey you.

What can I call you?


Sometimes Kal.

Huh, call me Jude then.

It's uh, 42.50 yeah?

KALY: Mhmm.

There-- there's a tip in there for you.

Thank you.

- JUDY: Yeah. - Here.

Yes, it's good to see, having you come out here,

'cause I don't like to drive in the snow anymore.

You know, the smaller boy who came before,

I thought, "Boy, he's not even old enough to drive."

Just barely.

JUDY: Yeah, you need a license for those things?


Is this your husband?

I've seen him at the store, before.

Oh, he's passed now.

You have any kids?

A boy.

A little older than you maybe.

KALY: I'm 17.

Yeah, yeah, a little older then.

I'm havin' a baby myself.


Wow, wow.

Yeah, that's wonderful, Kal.

A lot of work though.

You have a family here to help you out?

I'm stayin' with my foster parents

- until my birthday. - JUDY: Huh.

And my boyfriend, he's got a job and stuff.

JUDY: Yeah?

Sky, I'm callin' it, after my mom.

It works for a boy or a girl, either way.

Yeah, it's a lovely name.

KALY: My foster mom,

she says maybe it'll be quick for me,

won't hurt too much.

They always show in the movies the women screaming like that,

but she says it's not really like that,

but she's never had kids herself eh, so.

Yeah, my boy took 18 hours.

KALY: 18 hours!

Yeah, yeah. Oh, he was a stubborn one.

You can tell like that, eh, right from the get-go.

But you know, when it's over,

to hold them, you can't imagine the joy.

I know, I know it will be.

I can feel it.

JUDY: Yeah, a bit of sadness too, yeah,

in what you feel.

For me anyway.

Maybe you know, giving this new life

setting them out there in the world, you know

your own body gives something up for it.

But you know, then there's this darn thing

in front of you, and then you're in for it.

You know, you say, "Okay, yeah,

I'll give it my best shot, eh?"


I'd better get back out there, before it gets dark.

Smart girl you are.

Yeah, you stay warm out there.

KALY: Take care ma'am, see you next week.

Call me Judy, dear.



Come on man, I am.

I'm fucking trying.

Fuck man.

It's not your fucking boyfriend's dick, man,

use the fucking thing, let's go.

Swear to God.

You're fucking killing us out here.

You want to be working all fucking night.

Is that what you want?

You wanna work till fucking dawn?

You wanna be at work and watching the sunrise

come up together?


I'll trade you for that fucking bitch

on temp in a heartbeat.

Get to fucking work.

Where the fuck are you going?

Get the fuck back up there.

Get your fucking ass back up there and get to work.

I'm not gonna wait for your bitch ass all night.

Huh, get the fuck--

Are you fucking crying, huh?

You'll freeze your eyelid's shut,

rip your fucking eyelashes out.

Is that what you want?

JAMIE: Get your goddamn fucking disgusting ass breath

in my face all the time. - The fuck it is!

It stinks worse than your mom's cunt!

Watch your fucking mouth on that.

You fucking piece, alright.

MAN 8: Daryl!

Daryl. What the fuck, Daryl!


(Radio chatter)

MAN 7: He was just smashing the kid with...

They just jumped in at the wrong time.

(Indistinct chatter)

You have any family around here?

My mum's she's out west, near Prince.

She's on her own.

Well, my folks are in Grand Prairie.

DON: Just need some piss, boys, then you can go.

(Indistinct chattering in background)

It's freezing.

JAMIE: It fucking stinks in here.

You got any money?

You gonna sit?

Yeah, I guess I'm just gonna sit here.

JAMIE: That's it?

That's it.

That's all.

You're welcome.

Christ, shit!

(Car alarm beeping)


(Breathing heavily)


(Engine starts)


- JAMIE: Hey. - Oh, Jamie.

JAMIE: Surprise.

Jamie, what are you doing?

Oh, thank goodness.


My pipes are frozen solid.

Did you call a plumber?

Oh, who can afford a plumber?

I'd ask Bud next door, but he's such a pervert

you know, he looks at me funny.

I just thought well, you know, I'll just get down there

with the iron myself,

but you know, I burned my hand a touch,

so to hell with it I said, I'll use the outhouse.

JAMIE: Where's Goose?

You wipe him down

before you let him in here, mister.


Oh my.

Oh Jamie.

You notice when it does that?


What does it feel like?


Like someone's pulling at it or is it...

But I'm doing the pulling and the being pulled.

When I was a kid I was sure I could switch it off,

'cause I'd put my hand on your foot

and it would stop.


You just seem older.

I am.

(Dog barks)

KALY: That your son out there?

JUDY: Jamie, yeah.

You're a single mom now, eh?

I guess so.



You work at the Overweightea?

How do they pay there?

10 an hour.


And a discount.

Sometimes free stuff if it's gonna go to waste.

I like your boots.


You want one?

I quit.


(Snowmobile whirring)

See ya.

JUDY: Shoot.

Oh shoot, shoot.

Jamie, can you head in and pick up my pills

before they close?

JAMIE: Sure, just give me a minute.

Yeah, yeah, I'll call it in.

JAMIE: Okay.

(Phone beeping)


(Voice message) Hey, you've reached Danny, leave a message.



Can I get you anything?

You got a break coming up?

You want my coat?

You got a boyfriend?

Sort of.

Sort of?

Shit, okay.

You like to fool around?


Why not?

'Cause I got better things to do.

Like what?

I got things to take care of.

Like what?

Work and shit.


Other stuff.

What other stuff?

I'm havin' a baby.

You're having a baby?


You're too young to have a baby.

Says you.

What grade are you in?



Bet you get good grades.

I bet you're smart, eh?


I bet you're smart.

Not smart enough to use protection though.

You don't know anything.

JAMIE: Can I see you later?

Your sort-of boyfriend be mad?

So why not?

I don't know.

Just to talk.

I like talkin' to you.

Do you like talkin' to me?

(Rumbling in pipes)

(Horn honks)



Where to?

Boat launch?

I got you something.

Merry Christmas.


What happened to your windshield?

Uh, I smashed it.


That's pretty stupid.


You like living here?

Not really.

You'll probably go to college and stuff, yeah?

KALY: I hope so.

(Clears throat)

My buddy Danny, he goes to college.

You know him?

You don't like girls, do you?


You like me?

I don't know.

How old are you?


You think that's hot?

Not really.

It's kinda sad actually.


What's sad about being 20?

It's sad you're picking up high school girls.

JAMIE: High school girls like you?

Who says I'm picking you up?

You want me to pick you up?

I don't know.

I'm 19 actually.

But you've been with 20-year-olds before, eh?

KALY: Yeah.

You have?


You lie all the time or what?

What'd you do with them?

KALY: I don't know.

Show me.

Why not?

You didn't like it?

You ever done anything with a girl?


JAMIE: So how do you know you don't like girls?

I just know.

KALY: Do you like boys?

You've been with a guy?


KALY: You haven't even been with a girl I bet.


KALY: You haven't even been with a girl I bet.

Shit, I've been with a girl.

Why would you say that?

You're weird.

My buddy Danny, he's gay for sure.

KALY: That's cool.

But you two never...

No, no. Shit, no.

Seems like you're pretty curious.

I mean I guess I thought about it.

But more like I wanted to feel how he felt like--

Like you know, sometimes he just...

he just looked at me you know,


Shit, you know, no one ever looks at me like that ever?


KALY: I get that.

JAMIE: You're cool Kaly.

Cool Kaly.

You work with just guys on the rigs?

There's some ladies in the office, but yeah mostly.

KALY: Do you have a girlfriend?

I got a few, but nothing serious.


You like it up there?

Your hands are cold.


Where's your baby's daddy?

He went up north to the mines.

JAMIE: Is he coming back?

I think he got scared.

JAMIE: You're not scared?

I'm scared all the time.

KALY: What for?

Getting left.

Or leaving.

Or not leaving.

My mom she got this thing with her brain.

When I was a kid I always thought

she was like real tall you know.

And now she's so tiny.

It kinda freaks me out.

But you were just shorter.

Yeah, I guess I was pretty short, yeah.

KALY: Just gently.


I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

What for?

Did I mess it up?


Did it feel okay to you?

Are you kidding?


(Door creaks)

JUDY: Jamie?

JAMIE: Yeah?

JUDY: Can you come in here?

What's wrong?

JUDY: I can't get up.

You have to help me.

The water's freezing, mom.

JUDY: Pills.


Which one.


This one?

Get some water.

I'm sorry.



I'm such a fuck up mom.

- I am sorry. - JUDY: No, no, no.

No, Jamie, no, no.


It was my fault.

Not your fault.


No, no.

Tell me what's hurting.

I don't want--

I don't want to go back.

It's not a very nice life out there, is it?

Are you warming up?

Are you okay?

JUDY: I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

Why, why?

JUDY: This isn't how it's supposed to be.

I should be taking care of you.

I'm sorry.



(Dog whimpers)

(Judy mumbling)



(Breathing heavily)

Merry Christmas, Bug.

Merry Christmas.

The Description of Never Steady Never Still