[Scott] - History began in 1988.
...but really started in 2007.
And ever since, people of all kinds have banded together to not only celebrate the yearly football video game franchise Madden, but to pick an entry as their favorite.
WOO! It's pretty good, right? And don't you stand there thinking you can't have a high like this. Come on, there's a Madden for everybody!
I know, pretty wild right? And take my word for it, EA Sports cracked the code,
and has made sure that each and every Madden game is a different stroke for a different folk!
Madden '03 & 4, you play it for the lore! Packed with stuff never done before!
Madden 97, turned it to 11! This game can cure all kinds of depression!
Madden 25, what, did we travel through time?!
(yeah, I mean, it was pretty alright...)
John Madden Football? now I've seen it all. Shows how the mighty just refused to fall.
♪ Pick any game you want, you have my guarantee, 'cause there's a Madden just for ♪
Yeah, I know. I hate talking politics, but everybody has a right to Madden! Just ask the Madden 3DS community, those guys get it.
Madden Overdrive, not a nosedive. EA Sports, you continue to thrive!
What's their bottom goal? Their honest intent?
Providing players with pride and accomplishment.
Madden CD, Oh boy, oh gee, why can't these things start growing on trees?
Madden '08, It's nirvana on a plate!
[Wrong Opiniony Mike] - I don't like that one.
[Scott] - You're a f***ing disgrace.
♪ Pick any game you want, you have my guarantee, ♪
[Choir] - ♪ 'cause there's a Maddennnn... ♪
♪ forrrr... ♪
[Scott] - Not you.
[Choir] - ♪ meeee!!! ♪
[Scott] - *giggles* Yeah, I like this one.
[???] - No, No, NO!
It's just not fair!
Everybody's all about "Madden this, Madden that!"
People need to realize there's only one sports game that deserves recognition!
I'll show them, I'll show them ALL!
*Dramatic version of Scott the Woz theme(by Nick Karr) plays*
Hey all, Scott here, and man, what a perfect Madden day it is here in the year Madden '19.
That's Madden lingo for 2018. Sure, some games may be better than others,
but as human beings, we all share the primal instinct to pick a Madden to call our own.
Everyone has one, just take a look!
Society peaked in 1988 with the release of John Madden's football.
I sure do love Madden 07.
Seriously, like, have you even lived if you've never experienced Madden 2002 on the Game Boy Advance?
Madden 06 on the PSP is the future!
It's ALL-MADDEN! And it's #1 FOR A REASON!
We out here ready to play some Madden 19, am I right?
You ain't played Madden NFL 2007 BAY-
Madden 11 on Wii.
Madden '05: PETA Approved.
Madden 2002 for the Nintendo GameCube
John Madden Football.
I love Madden 07 more than I love my child.
It just makes me feel all warm and culty on the inside.
It's just such a great time to be talking about any retired coach or sportscaster born in 1936.
Talking about Madden, looking at Madden, trading in Madden,
Now that I got that out of my system, let's figure out what I should talk about today.
Ehhh, I dunno. I already talked about Sonic 2, what else is there?
It's always been there.
Well, I like both of those things, so why not?
So, this game is the little thing I like to call "Dick Vitale's 'Awesome, Baby!' College Hoops."
"College Hoops", slang for university basketball,
"Awesome Baby", a phrase deriving from pure joy.
But what exactly is a Dick Vitale?
Apparently, one of the most eccentric and beloved basketball commentators of all time.
He's evolved from coach, to sportscaster, to jack-of-all-trades.
Appearing in various films and commercials, writing books,
and lending his voice to the NCAA March Madness games.
Now the killer apps of Dick Vitale, are his catchphrases.
We have such mainstays as...
and any and all varieties of a phrase that even resembles...
In 1994, Time Warner Interactive struck a deal to cram as much Vitale in a Sega Genesis cartridge as humanly possible,
and that's all I got from the game's Wikipedia article.
Look how small this is, you could tattoo this entire thing on your foot!
And before anybody asks, no, this game has no relation to College Hoops 2K8.
THIS IS BULLS**T!
Well, let's take a look at the manual.
"Hello everybody. I'm Dick Vitale."
Oh my God, he's talking to me!
"How can anybody not be turned on by college hoops?"
We have a Dick Vitale Rosetta Stone in the back, too.
I always wondered what my neighbors meant when I heard them screaming "pine time," the answer was always here!
"Play it you'll be screaming, 'Awesome, Baby with a capital A!'"
That would look f**king stupid.
"The ONLY Genesis basketball game with a 3-D rotating court *and* Dick Vitale!"
Sure, some Genesis games have a 3D rotating court, and some have Dick Vitale, but this one, has both.
I can't hold this much longer, it's finally time to find out what's been sitting on my desk for the past two years!
This is Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops!
I hate when that happens.
I don't know if Dick Vitale ever made the statement, "If only I was the basketball",
and this is an "only Dick Vitale fans will get this" easter egg,
but man, I've been trying to figure out the reason behind this for the past 15 seconds.
Dick is wheeled in here, screams eleven letters in a row, and we have a title screen that delivers the heartiest
This title screen is great, because you could crop out any portion of it and still know exactly what it's about.
Oh, yeah, basketball, easy, next question.
Well, let's set up a game, and you know we have to represent our buds down in Tucson, Arizona,
and who better to go against than No Carolina?
Playing the actual game? Yep, the back of the box doesn't lie.
That is a 3-D rotating court and that is Dick Vitale.
You just run around with Dick Vitale in your ears, trying to get your ball in these things.
"No Carolina won?" Then who did?
[Dick Vitale] - Warm up the bus, baby, this one is history!
[Scott] - Jesus, [I] think I'm grieving.
This guy's just eating a sandwich.
Now, am I anal about losing, or completely indifferent to it?
I don't know, but personally, I think I'm on Team Anal for this one.
Now, of course, playing basketball is only one part of the Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" experience.
We also have the extra mode "Options".
Look at this, we have a sound test!
We can go through all of Dick Vitale's phrases like
[Dick Vitale] - "Awesome, baby!"
[Scott] - and
[Dick Vitale again] - "Awesome, baby!"
[Scott] - It never gets old!
[Unimportanty Tom] - Hey man, can you drop my dad at the hospital? [Dick Vitale (in background)] - Awe-Awe-Awe-Awe-Awe-Awe-Awe-Awe-
[Scott] - I'm busy. [Dick Vitale (in background)] - Awe-Awe-Aw-
So, Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
You may be asking, "Where does this fit in on the Madden timeline?"
That's a good question. I'd say it fits snugly between the Madden CD and Madden 95 era.
Does that make it any good?
Eh, not really.
It has that awkward "3D sports game for the Sega Genesis" twang,
and overall, this game just doesn't really hold up that-
D̢̀͝I͟C̶K̴̡͏͞ ҉̢͠V͏̷̀͡͏I̷͟͢T̸̀A̴͘͜͞͏L̨̕͢É̶̶̴̢ ̵̧́͢҉D̛͝I̕͟͢͠C͡҉́̀K͟͟͟͝ ̴̷̡͢V͞ÍT͞͝͝͞A̵L̵̵̢̢̕E̵̕ ̴̡D̷̕Ì̢C̸͘͝K̸̛͠ ̨҉V͏̛͟͝I̶͡T̡̡A̶̡̡̕͠Ĺ̸̨͠Ȩ̶̀͞ ̧́̕͘͞Ḑ̴́͞I̧C̨̡͢͟͡K҉҉̕͞ ̢͝V̧̡͘͜͡Í́̀͠T͘͟҉̀À̢͜Ĺ̵̡̧̕E̷̸
D̷I̴͢͏̵̕Ç̷̷̨͞Ḱ̢͡ ͜҉V̧͡͞I̵̸̴̧͟T͠͠À̵̡̨͟L̸̡͟Ȩ́҉ ̡͝҉Ḑ̕͢͝Į̷C̨҉̷K̷̨͘͢ ҉̴͡V̡͞͞I͏̷̴̴͏ŢA̛L̴͞E͝͏͝ ̡̛D̵̡͘̕͠Ì̕C̶̢̀͟͡Ķ͡ ̶̧̀͘V͏́͜I̷͜T̴́͟͞A̢҉L̢E͝D̸҉I̶̧͠C̸̡͢͞K̛͟͝͏̨ ̵̴̶̀V̢͡Į͠͞T͏͝Á̷͘L̢̧͠E̶̸̛͠͠
D̴̡̧͠I͢͡C̸̛K̨̀͘҉ ̡͘V̧̢̀͢Í̴̶̡̛T̸̵̛A͜͞҉L̴̡͢͡E̢̡̢̧ ̨̨̛͟D̶͏Į̷̡̛͡C̢̛͏͢K̶̨̕ ̕͢V̵̀҉̸I̷̷̡͟͠T̵̴͘̕A͡͝L̵͟É̷̢͜ ̷̕͜D̡̨͡I̶͝͏̸C҉҉͘K̀͏̶͘ ̷҉̵͞V̵͘I̴͏T̶̢̕͟͝A̕͞͠L̕͞͝E҉̡ ̵́̀͘͜Ḑ̸̶͘I̴̷C̷̡̛Ḱ̶̛͠͡ ̶͡͡V̛͏͠͏̵Í̶͠͞͠T̡̛́͜A͘͘͜͟L̵͘͟͡͠Ę͠
D͘͜I͏͘͜C̷͠҉̴Ķ̵̧ ̸͘V̢̧͠I̸̶͢͟T͏̢̛҉A҉͢L̶̡̛͞E̴҉̸ ͟͜͝͝D̛̕͡͝I͞͏C̛͞͝K̸̀ ͢҉̛͜V͢҉̧̕I̸͘̕͘͟T̸̷̨̛͘À̵̴̷L̴͞E̶̢ ̶͠͏D̢̨͞I͡͝͏̴̧Ç̛͢K̵ ҉̨́͢͟V̧̧̕͞͝I̵͞T̀͢A͜͡L̡͜͜E̡͏̶̵͘ ̷͞D̡͟͠͠I̛͞͝C͟͟K̢͢ ̀͘͠V̡͏I̵̵̸̴̛T̴̛͏ÁL̛҉͝E
D̵̶I͏́͠C̛͜Ḱ̴͘͜ ҉V̴̛͘̕͠I̸̴̶̧͘T́̕À͘͠L҉̨͏É͢͠ ́̕͘͜D̴̡͟I̵͡͝͠Ç̴͘͝͝Ķ͡͡҉ ̴̷̧̧̧V̴̧͜͢I̸̴͝͏T̷̡̧A̸̧̕͘͟L̸͞͠E͟͟ ̡̛͟͡͝D͏̡͘͡I̶͡C͏̵͠͠K̡͏ ̷͠V̶̷Ì͢T̵̀̕͞A̷̸L̢͢҉E͠͠͝ ̡̕D͘͏̵I̴̧͜͡C̀͝͏͘͜K̢͢͟ ̶V͏̀͘̕͟Ì̸̡͠T̛͏͝A̡͠L̀̕͞Ȩ̧͢
D̡͜͠Í̶̷C̨͘͏Ḱ̴̷̴ ͘͡V̵̡Į͞͡҉̡T̀͏͟͟͢A͘͏͘Ļ̵E̕͟͡ ̀Ḑ̡Ì̛͞͞͡C̷̡̀K͏̢̢͘̕ ̡͝V̵̕͜͟͠I̢͝͠T͞͡A̶҉̷͢L̵͢E̢͏͡ ̸̴̧́D͞Í͜C̷̷͢͞K̷̨ ̵V̶͘͜I̵̧̡T̷͞A̴̡̛͟͡L̷͏̨͝͝E̴̷͞ ̡͜D̕͡Í̴̵́C̴̡̀͏Ķ̵͏҉̢ ̴̴͢͏V̨Í̴͘͜͏T͏̸҉̶͢A̷̷Ĺ̷E̷̢̧͞͡
D͏I̴̵͜͡C̷̀K̨͏͞ ͜͏̕͝҉V̸̢̕͏̀I̴̴͘͡T̛͢Á͠͡L҉̷͟͢É̵ ̶̕D҉̡҉͞I̴͟C̡̢͞K̸͢͞͝ ̢͏V̢̢͜͡I̶̡̡̨T̴̵̡̀A̛͢ĻE̢ ͠D̢͞҉͝Í̶̧̨͢C̨̕K̸̨̛͜͝ ͏҉V͏͝I͠͞T̷̢̀́Ą̢͘͞L̵̨͜͜͝E̵̷͜͢ ̶͟͟D͝Į̵͡C̷̶̨͟K̸͟͜͢ ̶̡̢͠͠V̢̕͘I̵͝҉T̵̸̢͘͠A̢̨̨L̨̛̀Ę̸͟͡
Ḑ́͜͜͝Í͝C͟҉Ķ͏̨͞ ͏̧̛́V͏̸Į̶̨T̀҉̸́A̴͟͝҉͜Ĺ̸͜͞E͡͏ ̶̨̕̕͢D̴̢Ì̷̡̛͢C̸͘̕K҉͠ ҉͏҉҉҉V̨͟͝I̕͏͜T̵͞A̶͜L̶̢͘Ȩ̷́ ͘͝D̶̛̛Í̀Ć͞͞͠K̡̨̢͘͜ ̛҉V̀̕̕͞͝I͏T͘͢͡A̡̢̡͡Ĺ҉̢E͢ ̕͠͞D̢́̕I͏̕C̴̛͞͞Ķ͠͞ ̵̕͟V̶̸̸́͡Į̢͘͜͞T̷̡̢̕͟A̴̧͢͠L͟͞͠͠Ę̸͡
D͜͢҉I̕͢͢C̴͢K̨̕͜͟ ̷̴̶̕͢V҉̸̡͜͏Į̴̕͟͜T̨̨̧͞A̛͢҉L̸͘͘͜E̶͘͜͠͞ ̸҉̧D̴̶̡I̧͘͏̸͝C̶͏̢̀K͟҉͜ ̸̶̡̢V̸̨̡̀͜Í͟T͏̨A̕҉͠L̡͟͠͠͠E̛̛ ̨̀̕͜D̶́I̸͘͡҉͘C̶̛Ķ̀ ̢V̷͢͡Í̶̀͠T̴͘͠A̸L̷͞͏̸̡E̕͢͠͝ ̸́́͢D̕҉̸̨͢Ì̢C̶̨͜͟Ķ͟ ̵̸̴̶́V͟I̴̷͘T̴͢͜Ą̸̛L̷͡͏̀E҉̵͠ *Time paradox or something*
What the hell! I do NOT know what happened there, so whatever.
Let's just forget Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops and go back to playing some Madden 0-
All my copies of Madden 08 have been Vitale'd.
[AntDude] - All right everybody, you can stop with the comments, I'm finally gonna take a look at Dick Vitalee's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
[indiejacob] - So, "Dick Vitale's 'Awesome, Baby!' College Hoops" is what I would personally consider to be an all-time hooping classic,
it's definitely the pinnacle of the Dick Vitale-related Genesis games with "Awesome, Baby!" in the title.
[Caddicarus] - "Dick Vitalee's 'Awesome, Baby!' College Hoops."
What's all that about?
[TetraBitGaming] - "Dick Vitale's 'Awesome, Baby!' College Hoops" has a lot of unseen and unused content in it.
[The Completionist] - Hey everyone, and welcome back to another brand-new episode of The Completionist, where today, I'm gonna complete Dick Vital's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
*even bigger gasp*
Oookay, so this is just a wild shot in the dark here,
but I assume this timeline has been altered, and now the only sports game you can play is Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
It's a good thing I bought that space-time continuum-proof baggy!
*sigh of relief* A copy of Madden 08 and then a flash drive with the NFL theme song on it. You could never be too safe.
I think I was the only person not affected by this whole timeline fiasco because I was playing Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops when it all happened, there's always a loophole.
Well, since I can't alter the space-time continuum myself to change it back how it used to be.
I'm just gonna do what anybody who's in a world that believes that Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops is the only sports game you can play would do.
Dick Vitale is a myth!
I like Dick Vitale, more like I DON'T like Dick Vitale!
I drew devil horns on him! That's how you know he's bad!
*police siren* I drew devil horns on him! That's how you know he's bad!
*police siren* The police agree with me!
[News Anchor Tom] - This just in, a local anti-Dick Vitale nutjob decides to publicly whine about Dick Vitale,
Screaming such obscenities as "Vince Young" and "EA Sports".
He's being put under house arrest, and quite frankly, we're just glad this kind of lunatic is off the streets.
[Glasses Guy] - That guy might be on to something.
[Scott] - Hey all, Scott here! I've heard the requests, and yep, I'm finally gonna do it.
Today, we're gonna be taking a look at house arrest.
Take a look at your nearest ankle, if you have one of these guys plastered on it, then you get it!
House arrest has been a thing since the glory days, AKA the 17th century.
Simpler times, when you could force somebody to not leave their house without ankle jewelry.
Now, I've recently been subjected to house arrest, so consider this a first impressions, not a full-on review.
*knock knock knock knock*
[Glasses] - Hey, we couldn't help but notice that you've been comepletely rejected by society.
[Scott] - Yeah, I've been trying to pull off that look lately.
[Beard Guy] - Heh, sure is crazy what a little bit of public indecency will do to somebody.
[Glasses] - Yeah, some people are saying you're on a bit of a depression-fueled Dick Vitale protest.
Here, this always helps me when I'm down.
[Scott] - No, I'm fine. Hey, you want to know what depression doesn't look like?
*clearly not depression*
[Beard Guy+Glasses Guy Fusion] - Hey, guys. Whoa, you got "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops? I love these things!
[Scott] - All right, THAT is why I'm on some depression-fueled Dick Vitale protest.
A few hours ago, I was living it up with the big shots! Madden '94, Madden 97, Madden 11,
I had options! but now all people play is Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops,
really, WHO EVEN IS DICK VITALE?!
[Beard] - Not Satan, that's for sure.
[Scott] - Why even is everybody so pro-Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops?
[Beard-Glasses] - Because it's "Awesome, Baby!"
*Awesome Baby chatter*
*Awesome Baby chatter* [Glasses] - Dipsy-Do Dunk-A-RoOoOoOoO!
*Awesome Baby chatter* [Beard] - Slam bam jam baby!
*Awesome Baby chatter* [Beard-Glasses] - Diaper Dandy!
[Beard]- Woo! He's the best.
[Glasses] - It's completely by law.
[Beard] - Yep, this one's for all you government officials out there, I love Dick Vitale!
[Beard-Glasses] - He's just the perfect blend of Dick and Vitale.
[Glasses] - Yeah, we've all been conditioned since birth to be pro-"Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
But you still have to tell me, what's a Madden?
[Scott] - Alright guys, I don't think I'm from here.
I think the space-time continuum was altered, and I'm from a time where Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops wasn't the only sports game you could call your own.
Look, I have proof.
It's a football video game franchise that releases every year that peaked in 2007.
My timeline had loads of these things, all with different numbers after the word "Madden".
[Glasses] - Oh my God.
[Scott] - I just want people to know that there's more to life than just games based around Dick Vitale!
[Beard] - I- I have a confession. I- I- I don't really like Dick Vitale.
[Scott] - Oh, oh! W-What's the name of that, I know it, FREE SPEECH!
[Glasses] - This Dick Vitale sh*t has been spanked on to our brain since we were young, and quite frankly, I don't know why.
[Scott] - Listen, there's more to life than just one sports game, and if I can't get back to my timeline, then I'm gonna try my best to change this timeline.
To prove to everybody that Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops doesn't have to be the only one we can like.
[Beard-Glasses] - Now those are 50 words I can get behind.
*Ringtone from title screen of Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops*
[Scott] - We can start by changing that ringtone. *ringtone continues in background*
[Glasses] - Well, If we really want to know why Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops is a "thing these days", we can just go ask our supreme leader,
lives down the street.
[Scott] - Neat Sh*t. I'll head out with you guys.
[Beard] - Wait, don't you have one of those "I Hate Dick Vitale And I'm Proud Of It" bracelets on?
[Scott] - It's okay, they ran out of small ankle bracelets, so they had to give me an XL one.
I can just slip this off right now and put it on a ceiling fan or whatever, and they'll think I'm moving around the house.
[Officerery Smith] - He's gone f**king mad!
[Scott] - All right, what's the plan here?
[Beard-Glasses] - Mind wording that in a Dick Vitale context?
[Glasses] - Yeah, as much as I want to overthrow the government and all, I still can't really understand much if it's not in the Dick Vitale genre.
[Beard] - I think the entrance to our leader's lair is underground that hole over there. All we need to do is sneak past those guards.
[Beard-Glasses] - I think I know how to distract 'em.
[Guard Joe] - Man, I love Dick Vitale!
[Guard Bob] - Heh, same!
[Guard Joe] - Hehe, yeah man.
Holy Sh**! Is that Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops?
[Guard Bob] - Maybe. We better play 'em all to make sure.
[Guard Joe, whispering] - Let's go.
[Scott] - All right, you guys go in. I'll hang back and uh, stay guard.
[Beard-Glasses] - Dick Vitale?
[Supreme Leader] - Dick Vitale! He's good, right?
[Glasses] - So good.
[Supreme Leader] - It's just so great to see people who get it!
[Beard-Glasses & Leader] - ...the perfect balance of Dick and Vitale!
[Leader] - Well, you've all won me over. What can I do for you?
[Glasses] - You know, we do have a few Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops questions for you.
[Leader] - Shoot!
[Beard] - Why are you wearing a mask?
[Leader] - I mean, I'm not Dick Vitale, so why would I show my face?
[Glasses] - Fair reasoning.
[Leader] - Yeah, you guys can show your faces all you want, I just don't want to go to hell.
[Beard-Glasses] - So how did the world get so "Awesome, Baby!"?
[Leader] - Well, I would normally lie and just say it's always been like this, but you guys seem pretty cool, talking about Dick Vitale and all.
So originally, things weren't like this, and there were a ton of other sports games besides Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
I refused to like that. I built this time machine to travel back in time, persuade Dick Vitale to buy the patent for all video games,
and force no other sports games to be created, other than Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops!
...and also pulled some strings in the government to make me the head honcho on all Dick Vitale-related activities,
...on top of that, make all Dick Vitale-related activities mandatory for all citizens.
[Beard] - Man, it's so nice knowing someone with the means to time travel uses it to force everyone to love Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
[Leader] - Somebody had to do it.
I'm also working on a bunch of new things, like this goo that turns and any game you drown in it into a cyborg, and this lie detector I bought at Cracker Barrel!
Anyways, I have to prepare a statement to the people tonight. Some nutnjob was talking about "Madden" or whatever.
Psh, must've crossed over from another timeline. We'll be exterminating him soon, but I'm gonna tell everyone he's crazy or something.
Let me just find my access code for the satellite transition, and we'll be all set.
*NFL theme ringtone*
[Leader] - How did you get that ringtone?
[Beard-Glasses] - Not from somebody who tole me all about the wonders of Madden NFL Football, that's for sure!
[Leader] - All right guys, I'm sorry I have to do this, but you all know too much. We can't have people like you poisoning everyone's minds, especially with the info you know.
[Beard] - Hey, hey, look! It's Dick Vitale!
[Leader] - All right, I know you're lying, but I can't take a chance like that, so boom!
Okay, not there- SON OF A BITCH!
[Beard] - Oh my god, what a rush!
[Beard-Glasses] - And on top of that, we're home by 9, too!
[Scott] - All right, what did you guys discover?
[Glasses] - Oh, he's f**k.
[Beard] - He altered the space-time continuum and put me in this f**king abomination, I can't get it off!
[Glasses] - Yeah, he traveled back in time to make Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops the only game we can play.
And he put himself in power.
[Beard-Glasses] - He was gonna make a statement to the people tonight over satellite, but I swiped his access code.
The code is "Dick Vitale."
[Scott] - Wow! That's the nicest felony anybody's ever committed for me!
But since we have the access code now, we can tell everybody the truth! We gotta set up a camera.
*Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops sounds*
*Static-y Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops sounds*
[Scott] - All right, what's up virgins and virgettes, I got big news for you all!
Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops is not the only sports game you can play. Look at this!
[Guard Joe] - WHAT THE F**K IS THAT?!
[Scott] -There are more possibilities out there than just Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
We all deserve to have an opinion, to be okay with the idea that sometimes, it's okay not to like Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
We all deserve to have options with our sports games, and the right to pick one to call our own.
And that is how you tell everybody everything they believed was a lie.
[Glasses] - Yeah, I gotta hand it to you, you really convinced me my whole life's been a sham.
[Scott] - Well, we got to see how people are responding!
Well, looks like the Wii Shop Channel closed early.
[Leader] - This. Is. Bullsh*t.
I'm not going to let my dream be thrown away just because I'm straggler from another timeline wants to change all my hard work!
These people need to be shown that Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops is a right, not a privilege.
They need to see just how powerful this game is, they all need to be taught a lesson!
[Beard] - What was that?
*Impending doom-ish music*
[Beard-Glasses] - Alright, I'm just gonna say it. I think he went too far.
[Leader] - You fools!
You thought Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops wasn't the only sports game you can play? That's ridiculous.
You've angered the Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops' gods!
Time Warner Interactive will smite you all.
You've asked for this!
[Scott] - He's destroying the city with his love for Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops!
[Glasses] - Hate to be a buzzkill, but I usually call it quits when these sorts of things happen.
[Beard-Glasses] - So I stole that guy's "whatever-a-teleportation-base-is" for NOTHING!
[Scott] - Wait.
This'll teleport me inside of that giant robot, he might be in there controlling it!
I'm going in there to fight for the right to Madden 08.
I don't know if I'm gonna survive, but if he kills me...
At least I'll die fighting for what I believe in.
[Beard] - It's cold out there, you might wanna... might wanna put on a coat.
[Scott] - Alright, I'll text you guys if I die.
[Glasses] - *snap* Looking forward to it.
[Scott] - F**k, that stung!
*Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops title screen theme*
*Basketball guy getting knocked over*
*Scott getting beat up in 16-bit*
It's gonna take a lot more than aggravated assault and battery to stop me
*Scott getting kicked into Supreme Leader's bowling pin collection*
Augh. What, does it look like I'm made out of blood to you?!
[Leader] - You stupid, dumb, dumb, stupid, Madden 08 fan. Don't you understand it's easier to default to society than tell everyone that a game called "Madden 25" exists?
[Scott] Gah, my neck's falling asleep.
[Leader] - This will be life from now on. Everything shall be "Awesome, Baby!"
[Scott] - No, everything should be centered around a yearly football game franchise by EA SPORTS!
*machine moving sounds*
*Scott The Woz Boss Battle Theme(by AlenRiddickMusic) plays*
*Scott The Woz Theme Continues*
*a lot of KABOOMs*
*Scott The Woz Theme ends*
[Scott, in pain] - Ohh, my god.
That hurt my skin and body.
[Leader/RelaxAlax all along!] - I can breathe again!
[Scott] - Was it worth it? Why did you do all this?
[RelaxAlax] - Well, I just couldn't accept that people didn't care about Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops.
[RelaxAlax] - Well, I just couldn't accept that people didn't care about Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops. [Scott, in background] - F**K!
[Alax] - That was the sports game I cared about,
[Alax] - That was the sports game I cared about, [Scott, still in background] - OW!
[Alax] - and to see how I'm talking about anything other than that, it- I just wanted things to go my way from once. [Scott, yet again in background] - GOD! OHH!
[Scott, finally in foreground] - I didn't know blood bled that much.
Listen man, I was never into the idea of there being Madden games outside of the eighth one, but, you just gotta relax.
*how many times have I heard that joke*
*how many times have I heard that joke* [Scott] - There's more to life than just Dick Vitale, and...
there's more to life than Madden, too.
C'mon, there's gotta be another sports game that you like.
[Alax] - Well, I guess Mario Golf: Toadstool Tour's all right.
[Scott] - That's the one with Mario right?
[Alax] - On a good day.
[Scott] - What's going on here, anyways?
[Alax] - Oh, the timeline's resetting back to what it was before I took some... creative liberties with it.
[Scott] - OOH!
[Alax] - Except, the explosion's gonna wipe everything caught it from the timeline, so...
*rip Madden 08*
[Scott] - AAAAAH!
[Alax] - Hey, I'm sorry. Maybe Dick Vitale's "Awesome, Baby!" College Hoops isn't for everyone.
I'm starting to see that now.
[Scott] - Nice observation. I wish you realized that before you turned me into a blood dispenser, but it's okay.
Well, if I understand this correctly, the time machine blew up because I sacrificed Madden 08,
so this is the exact same timeline from before, but now with even more "No Madden 08."
Madden 2099 is the next evolution in mankind!
I bloody loved Madden '01.
It's Madden 12, for the NES.
Time spent not playing John Madden is time spent being John Sadden.
But it's Madden 13 we're talking about here.
I like to wash myself off with a copy of Madden 07 on the Gamecube.
[Scott] - Know what? I'm okay with this.
Madden 08 may be gone, but at least everybody else has options. Hey, I have all these other games to play,
like right now I can play- Jesus Christ, out of all options.
Well, after sitting at this desk for two years, talking about stupid Nintendo games and Madden 08,
It's a little weird saying that one of those things is gone.
*phone ringing* It's a little weird saying that one of those things is gone.
[Sweepstakes-Winner-Announcery Jim] Hey Scott, it's your old pal Sweepstakes-Winner-Announcery Jim here!
It's my honor to tell you you've won our contest where you get to create whatever video game you desire!
*face of true excitement*
[Scott, gleefully] - I told them I wanted to make a game called "Madden 08" for the Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3 and PlayStation 2 and all the old platforms and they're making an HD remake of it too! AAAAAH!
*Scott The Woz Boss Battle Theme(by AlenRiddickMusic) plays*
Hey! Scott, you caught me playing Madden '05 for the Game Boy Advance!
See, what I really like about this game is the gameplay. You really can't beat it, Scott. You really f**king can't beat the gamepl-
Alexa, what is the definition of a virgin?
[Alexa] - Someone who likes Stuart Little and has never owned Madden 13 for the Wii U.
[Anti-virgin] - Well, thank God I got my-
[Virgin] - Oh my- every ti-
I'm truly infatuated with Madden 07 for the original Xbox.
There simply is no better game.
I'm gonna have to give Madden 99 a 7.5/10. It really is the Dark Souls of Japanese shoot-'em-ups.
If John Madden was so good, where's um, where's John Madden 2?
[RelaxAlax] - Mr. Cat, I always believed that having a protein-filled, healthy dose, of Madden 07 for the Wii really starts your day off right.