Practice English Speaking&Listening with: The Good Room with Michael Jr.

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(congregation cheers and applauds)

All right, thank you so, so very much.

I almost wanna take this jacket off,

'cause I have a snug shirt on, 'cause I'm here with Craig,

(congregation laughs)

'cause his shirts are always a little snug.

(Michael laughs) He shop at,

I think he shop at "Young Navy."

Sometimes, I think that's where.

(Michael laughs) It's comedy, people.

(congregation laughs)

So we're gonna have some fun.

Here's one thing that I have learned from Craig.

So when Craig delivers the Word of God, it is phenomenal.

It's super, super strong, and I believe how you do anything

is really how you do everything,

because I also asked the dude for a workout,

and I was like, "This brother is tripping.

"I'm not doing this at all."

(congregation laughs)

So what do you do?

When he talks about God's Word, I dig in, but his workout,

I'm like, "Bro, that's for somebody else.

"That's not me."

(congregation laughs)

So there's gonna be three verses of scripture

that's gonna apply to what I'm gonna be talking about today,

and I'm gonna tell you what they are,

and then later on when you go home,

you should read these scriptures

and they're gonna pop in a probably a new way

as a result of what we talk about today.

So those three verses are Proverbs 29:18,

they'll probably put them on a screen at some point,

and then you got Proverbs 19:21, and then Isaiah 46:10.

(Michael laughs) Some of you are like,

"Wait a minute, what's happening right now?"

So this year, we've had to wear a lot of masks,

and I wear a mask.

I think you should wear a mask.

I wear a mask everywhere I go in public.

I only take it off when I gotta sneeze.

(congregation laughs)

I just, and then I put it right back on.

That's the only time I take it off.

I also wanna mention, oh, we have a really, really awesome

CD that we're giving, 'cause people need to laugh.

There's a lot going on, so people really need to laugh.

So if you wanna get a CD that we have available,

just go to michaeljr.com/CD,

and you can get it at whatever price you want,

a hundred dollars or no cost at all.

We just wanna put as much laughter as we can out there.

So today, I'm gonna tell you about my first time

ever getting on stage.

I remember, it was probably, I was 19 years old.

It was a long time ago.

This was my first time ever.

I grew up in Grand Rapids, Michigan,

and the only place I could get on stage

that they had an open mic was in Lansing, Michigan.

So I had to get in my Jetta, which was a really raggedy car.

If you open the door from the outside, the door fell off.

(congregation laughs)

The wipers worked great, until they got wet.

Like, it was a really raggedy car.

So I'm on my way to Lansing to get on stage,

and I still remember my first joke ever.

They only gave me three minutes of comedy.

I could only have three minutes that I could do,

and I had like 12 minutes of comedy

that I wanted to crush it at three minutes.

So I thought.

I actually finished my entire set

and still had a minute and 42 seconds left.

(congregation laughs)

But I remember my very first joke,

and I wasn't a Christian at the time.

In fact, I didn't even know anybody named Jesus.

I just wanna throw it out there.

Like, I didn't.

(congregation laughs)

But this is my first joke ever.

I went back and looked at.

It was my very first joke.

So my first joke was something like this.

I was like, "Listen, better not nobody heckle me."

It's double negative.

I didn't even know that back then.

Anyway, I said, "Better not nobody heckle me,

"'cause the last person to heckle me,

"I hit him in his jaw,

"punched him in the stomach,

"and I grabbed him by the back of his wheelchair

"and pushed out of my way."

(congregation laughs)

(Michael laughs) That was my first joke.

(congregation laughs)

So since that time, I've learned an awful lot about comedy

and a little bit about life.

And what I'm really called to do

is to comedically inspire people to walk in purpose.

So I'm gonna talk about three ways

that I actually developed comedy.

There's three methods that I use to create comedy,

and I've learned the same three method methods

can apply to life in you understanding

what God has called you to do.

Like literally, the exact same methods can take place.

I'm gonna kind of walk you through 'em,

and some of you guys may notice yourself in this as well.

So the first method that I use is really improv.

Like, I really, really like improv a lot.

What's your name, dude?

[Congregation Member] Grant.

What is it?

[Congregation Member] Grant.

Grant.

How much money you got in your pocket right now?

You got 20?

120.

Oh, 120.

I was about to say, you ain't even got Grant

in your pocket right now?

Okay, cool.

What do you do for a living?

[Congregation Member] I work for a ministry.

You work for a ministry?

Cool, but what you do for a living?

I love people.

You love people for a living?

Yeah, that might be illegal, bro.

I don't know exactly what that supposed to mean,

(congregation laughs)

"I love people for a living."

Okay, where you hiding your Cadillac at?

I don't know what that means.

(congregation laughs)

So here's what just happened.

One of the methods which I use to create comedy is improv.

I don't know Grant.

I don't travel with a Grant.

It just doesn't happen.

So with improv, you don't really have a plan.

You're just jumping out there to see what would happen.

I was hoping I could find some funny in this dude,

and we found an opportunity to laugh.

Like, it was right there, right?

So, life is extremely similar when it comes to people

trying to figure out what it is God has for them to do.

A lot of people, even right now watching,

you're kind of improving your way through life.

You're not really sure what you're supposed to do.

You're trying this, you're volunteering here.

You're not 100% locked in.

And the thing about improv, it has a short lifespan.

Like, it's a super short shelf span.

Like, if I went to my next event and told them,

"Yo, I met this dude named Grant.

"He had $120 in his pocket." (Michael laughs)

They'd be like, "Okay, what else?"

Like, they don't even want to hear that story.

So I'd have to continue to try to reinvent myself

every time the season changed, so to speak.

The way to really utilize improv is,

what I've learned in the middle of it

is there's three questions that I'm asking.

The first question I'm asking while I'm looking

for the funny is, "What is the problem?"

Like, what's the rub?

So for instance, your name is Grant.

So I go Grant, and then I'm like, "Ah, okay, Grant,

"how much money does he have, 'cause I know

"there's a president named Grant who's on a bill."

So I'm looking for what's not congruent.

When you're walking in your purpose,

even if you're improving in life,

there's three questions you gotta ask:

"What's the problem, who are the people,

"and what can I give?"

When you ask those three questions, you're much closer.

Think about it.

Like, there's people who will go to school, go to college,

and the first thing they're asking themselves,

like if you ask any college student right now,

"Why are you in school,"

the first thing they'll say most likely is,

"Well, I decided to be like a pediatrician."

Why a pediatrician?

"Oh, 'cause I love kids."

It always starts with what I love.

"I like computers.

"I enjoy doing this."

No, no, no, no, no, you need to start with the problem,

find out who your people are, and then what you can give.

So the other way I create comedy

is this thing called a premise.

This is one of my favorite ways,

'cause the premise is when I have an idea for something

that I think might be funny, but I'm not sure.

But I think, so now I got to work this thing out.

An example of a premise is I have a theory about men,

a theory about men and how we like

to embrace one another, hug one another.

Not love, like what you just said.

That was a little creepy.

(congregation laughs)

But how we like to embrace one another.

So for example, men, I'm cool with hugging men,

especially after this pandemic is over.

I just like hugging people, right?

But men have some rules around hugging.

This is just a theory I have.

We've got some rules.

We've never talked about it before, ever.

We've never, ever had a conversation.

Sir, have you ever talked to another man

about how you wanna be hugged?

(congregation laughs)

No, no, not at all, it's never come up.

But there are rules.

We have these rules.

We never talked about 'em, but there are rules.

The rule number one is the hug can only last 1.4 seconds.

(congregation laughs)

That's a rule.

We never talked about it, but all the men in here

are like, "Yeah, you're right, that is true."

(congregation laughs)

And rule number two, you know the hug is over when?

When we tap out.

Tap, tap, release.

(congregation laughs)

That's what we do, every single time.

Tap, tap, release.

Fellas, you ever tap out and they don't release?

(congregation laughs)

You're like "Tap, tap, bruh, tap, tap!"

I'm doing Morse code on this dude's back.

(Michael imitating Morse code)

I tapped him so hard, he burped.

I'm like, "Dude, you need to let go.

"You gotta let go.

"You just burped.

"You gotta let go."

(congregation laughs)

The other rule we have around hugging, men,

is really pretty simple.

It's left-hand under, right hand over, tap out, release.

The fellas right now are doing the math like,

"That is true, but we never talk about that.

"That's crazy."

It's left hand under, right hand over, tap out, release.

You know how you know this is a rule, fellas?

You ever have a dude try to go double under?

(congregation laughs)

He can't go double under.

He go double under, you gotta go double over.

Now y'all slow dancing.

That's what you're doing, you're slow dancing.

(congregation laughs)

You might as well turn on the Luther Vandross.

That's what you're doing,

or for this audience, Barry Manilow.

You might as well just turn it on.

(congregation laughs)

It's just some rules we have.

So listen, that started out as a premise.

I just started digging into, how could that be funny?

Like men, like, every time, release.

I just start digging into, and I had to get on stage

and test that joke out until I knew exactly what it was.

Now, some premises, you just have to let 'em go.

Like I got some jokes, I think they're hilarious.

The audience is like, "Okay, dude."

And I have to know when to let that go.

Some people are doing life trying to hear God's voice

and what he wants to do, but you have a premise.

Or maybe you don't even hear from God.

You just got a premise.

Some people went to school on a premise,

and now all you have is a plaque on the wall,

because your premise was about you.

"I like to do this.

"I enjoy that.

"Well, that's fun,"

as opposed to asking the three questions

that you have to ask: "What is the problem,

"who are the people, and what can I give?"

If it's easier for you to remember,

I like to refer to this as the three P's:

"What's the problem, who are the people,

"and what can I give?"

The reason that last one is a G

(congregation laughs)

is because nobody remembers three P's anyway.

(congregation laughs)

"What's the problem, who the people,

"and what can I give," three P's.

(congregation laughs)

(Michael laughs) Listen,

you guys are gonna remember that

long before you remember the three whatever elses.

(congregation laughs)

So you really, really, really wanna do that.

Listen, the Bible says in one of the verses

that I just gave you, "Many are the plans of a man's heart,

"but God's purpose shall prevail."

Like, it's his purpose that shall prevail.

Another premise I had, I just threw this on stage once.

One of my friends, my Amish friend texted me a joke once.

(congregation laughs)

(Michael laughs)

My Amish friend texted me a joke.

It's a premise.

See how it has mixed reviews right now?

I've still gotta kinda work that thing out.

(congregation laughs)

Some premises you have to let go of.

Some of you guys are doing something

because it's comfortable.

God is calling you to something greater,

and you won't let go of this premise.

You're still holding on to the same premise.

The best jokes, the best ones by far for me

are the ones when I start with the punchline.

When the punch line shows up first, the impact

is always greater, and the work is not nearly as hard.

The punchline shows up first.

In fact, here's one.

There's four words you can use when you tell any story,

and people will believe the story,

no matter how crazy it is.

There's four words you can use.

I'ma tell you a crazy story.

I met a lady, for real, I met a lady who had a tail,

like an actual lady, she had an actual tail.

I was at Walmart.

(congregation laughs)

Did you see what just happened right now?

You was like, "No, a tail?"

I was like, "I was at Walmart."

Y'all are like, "Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah,

"I know her, I know her, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."

(congregation laughs)

Why'd you say that, why'd you say that?

(congregation laughs)

Here's the thing about people at Walmart.

I don't think the people at Walmart are crazy.

I think what happens is when we go to Walmart,

we become those people.

(congregation laughs)

Like, for real.

As soon as you cross the threshold, three teeth fall out,

and you got on some house shoes.

You're like, "Well, I don't even like bunny rabbits.

(congregation laughs)

"Where did these bunny rabbits come from?

"I don't even like bunny rabbits.

"This is the weirdest thing."

Another joke that came to me punchline first,

when God operates, he has the end.

He has the end in mind at the beginning.

The punchline comes to me first,

and those jokes are always the cleanest.

So one example, I said this before.

I was watching TV, and this commercial came on.

You've seen it before.

It's like the old lady.

She fell down, and she's like,

"Help, I've fallen and I can't get up."

First thing I'm thinking,

"Why don't the camera man help her?

"He right there."

(congregation laughs)

That thing started with me sitting down saying,

"Why don't the cameraman help her?"

I had to create all the other stuff afterwards

and put it in front of it.

My dad, he used to read books to us when we were kids,

but he wouldn't just read any book.

I mean, he would read it,

but he would always tweak the book

so it would fit our circumstances,

just to make sure we could understand.

One book that he would read from

was from an author named DJ Seuss.

I don't know if you've ever read those before.

(congregation laughs)

One was called "The Cat and the Rat."

That was a fun book.

And then there was "Green Eggs and Spam."

I don't know if you read that one.

There's another series of books where he read from,

oh, it was called "Winnie Was Po'."

(congregation laughs)

Yeah, "Winnie Was Po'."

My favorite line in that was "Tigger, please."

It was like my favorite line.

(congregation laughs)

(Michael laughs) That is awesome.

White people are like, "I don't know if I can laugh."

(congregation laughs)

When you start like God did in Isaiah,

like God talks about in Isaiah 46:10,

when you start with the punchline first

and know where you're working to, it is always smoother.

It's always easier.

And the question you have to ask is, "What is the problem?

"Who are the people?"

No matter what you do in life,

there's people at the end of what you're doing.

Are those your people?

Are those the people you are called to?

And then you ask the question, "What do I give?"

You don't ask, "What can I give?"

You don't ask, "What should I give?"

You say, "What do I give?" and then you do that thing.

So I got a really cool example for you guys.

So I was thinking, what type of people

improv their way through life?

So I met this artist who's straight improv.

Like, he was improving, really good artist.

This dude could draw amazingly,

but I wanted to just test this theory out

and see if it would have a big impact as a result of it.

So this dude is an artist.

He could draw well, but he's also a pizza delivery dude,

because that's how it goes.

But so I worked with them.

I found out a lot about him

and what his pains were and whatnot.

And then I said, "What if we started with something,

"and we knew the result, and then we worked from there?

"How would that impact him?"

And what actually took place was he explained

that he was so enthusiastic about this process.

Like, he drew this thing more than he'd ever done before.

Like, he just was so far into it, it was amazing.

And the people we connected with him, in order to,

some of this won't make sense right now,

but in a moment, it will.

His people that he delivered to were blown away.

It was a family who lost her special needs son,

but instead of me explaining it, check it

(Michael knocking on door)

Hey, hey, how's it going, man?

How you doing? Yo, what's up, bro?

Good, good, good.

My name's Lamar Cornelius.

Currently, I'm a pizza delivery driver.

I just deliver pizza.

You have generous people who gives you a nice tip,

and then other days, you have people who don't give a tip.

If you have bills that's piling up,

you kind of bank on going to work

hoping that it's a good day.

There's moments when I'm delivering pizzas

where I will have an inspiration

or an idea that comes to mind.

I'm at work.

I have to put in a time there to make sure ends meet,

and then come home and do what I love to do, which is art.

(upbeat electronic music)

So listen, there's a family that you don't know.

It's the Day family.

This is a picture of their son.

His name is Brexton.

He's special needs, and he recently passed away.

I've always known I wanted to help people,

ever since I was a little boy.

So I have this art ability,

and I have this desire to help people,

but I haven't had the best opportunities

to show my love for art

and my love for helping people come together.

Lemme explain, I ain't paying you, a'ight?

So now I actually get to give

from something that I love to do.

So Brexton and McKeeley were born three months premature,

and they would fit really in the palm of our hands,

and just their little legs would hang off.

They were tiny.

They were both actually diagnosed with brain hemorrhages

at about a week old, and a week later,

they took a second scan, just normal protocol,

and McKeeley was completely and totally healed from that.

Brexton had not.

I really feel like we all have kind of a primary instrument

that the Lord uses to sort of shape us

and mold us and chisel us into the image of Christ.

Physically, he was very limited.

Mentally, he could light up a room,

just had the most joy, the brightest eyes you've ever seen,

and just engaged everybody that he ever interacted with.

We were just at this place

where things were just about to get better,

and one morning, we just went into the bedroom,

and he wasn't breathing, and his heart wasn't beating,

and called 911, and they came, and they were able

to save his life, but he was never the same after that.

We were probably in and out of the hospital

maybe seven or eight times with pneumonia,

and after about a three week battle there in the ICU,

he finally succumbed to pneumonia.

Hey you guys,

I have somebody I want you to meet.

This is Lamar, and he's a really great artist.

He heard about your story, and he has a gift for you.

(uplifting instrumental music)

(congregation applauds)

Oh, y'all clapping, okay, cool.

So the first thing I presented to him was the problem,

and those were his people, for sure,

because he's also in a situation

where he's not able to see his son.

And then he simply answered the question,

"What can I do?"

There's another story that's extremely similar to this one,

where someone said, "What is the problem,

"who are the people, and what can I do?"

And that person was God,

and the problem was sin, and the people was us.

And what he decided to do was send his son Jesus

to this earth to die for us.

When Jesus got to earth, his punchline was the cross.

That's where he was headed the entire time.

He could do improv.

"Who touched me?"

He asked that question.

He was ready.

His premise was clear.

It was right on point,

and he delivered exactly what he supposed to deliver.

The question is, will you receive it?

Can you fully receive it, or are you gonna just continue

to improv your way around and say, "Ooh, what about Buddha?

"Ooh, what about the universe?

"What about the, what about the, ooh, what about?"

There's a bunch of ways to improv, but if you really

wanna deliver what you're called to deliver,

you have to have that relationship

with the one who gave you the gift in the first place.

There's a story I tell.

I feel like I used to tell it now.

It's kind of cool.

So I came up with this story.

It's a story about having a relationship with Jesus.

But the way I came up with this story is I was doing a,

I was writing a joke.

I was writing this joke about "the good room."

How many people here, raise your hand

if you know what "the good room" is,

know what "the good room" is?

There's one hand in the back.

(congregation snickers)

Cool, just that one hand.

You got a big hand, though.

That's a big hand,

(congregation laughs)

so that's like two hands, man.

You really know what it is, don't you?

I just randomly jumped into some improv right now.

So "the good room" is that room, the truth is

is mostly everybody here, you know what "the good room" is.

Like, even watching right now,

you know what "the good room" is.

"The good room" is that room in your grandmother's house

or your aunt's house.

It's that one room that's better than the rest of the house.

Can't nobody go in there.

There's plastic on the furniture.

It's really just for looks.

How many people know what "the good room" is now?

(congregation laughs)

Exactly, all the hands went up.

Wow, you got two big hands, sir.

That's awesome.

(congregation laughs)

I didn't know if the other one was gonna be that big,

but that's a great big hand, too.

I gotta hand it to you, man, that's a big hand.

(congregation laughs)

So everybody knows what "the good room" is.

It's that room that like, you can't go in there.

There's plastic on the furniture.

It's really just for looks.

That's where the china's located.

So I was writing this joke about "the good room,"

and in the middle of writing this joke,

God stopped me and told me to tell this story to his people.

And just now after telling you

how God sent his Son to be the punchline,

I just felt like I should share this for whatever reason.

Maybe some of you knew about this before,

but this is how I came up with the theory behind this joke.

So imagine that you were a house, right?

And this is a story about having a relationship with Jesus.

This is a story I wrote instead of writing that joke.

I never finished the joke.

This is the story.

So imagine that you are a house,

and outside of the house is Jesus Christ.

And he wants to come in, but he'll never force his way in.

He actually wants you to invite him in.

And the reason some people in this room, watching right now

at your location, watching right now at home,

the reason you haven't invited Jesus into the house

is 'cause you're cool with the way things are right now.

Whenever you need something, you just walk up to the door,

crack it open, say a little prayer,

tell him what happened, tell them what's going on,

and then you close the door and go into the house.

That's not a relationship at all.

How can you hear his voice under those circumstances?

How can you really understand what your life's punchline is

under those circumstances?

We're going into a new year, and you need to deliver.

And the reason you won't let him in

is 'cause your house is a mess.

You think you need to clean it up first.

How's that working out for you?

(congregation laughs)

There may be drugs or pornography in the house,

or are you just buying a bunch of stuff,

trying to be distracted from the mess, or relationships.

You brought other people in the house,

hoping that they can help you clean it up, but they can't.

The only one who can clean up the house

is standing outside the door

wearing an apron with a bucket in his hand,

waiting on you to truly open the door.

Then there's other people watching right now.

You used to have Jesus in the whole house,

but whether you realize it or not, you have moved him

to just one room in the house, "the good room."

Have you ever noticed how "the good room" most of the time

is the one right up front with the big window,

so when people look in, they think the whole house is clean.

But it's not; it's just that one room.

So when you hear about you coming to church

or watching online,

they think the whole house is clean, but it's not.

It's just that one room.

You quote scriptures, but it's just that one room.

You got a Bible in your car, but it's just that one room.

You got the app on your phone, but it's just that one room,

and your streak is zero.

(congregation laughs)

Jesus wants access to the whole house,

and I'm telling you, if you will make the decision

to open the door and let him in,

he'll show up at a contractor named the Holy Spirit,

and they will make sure the whole house

(congregation cheers and applauds)

is functioning the way that it should.

There is something significant for you to deliver

in this up-and-coming year, something significant,

and it's always been inside of you.

But you have to stop just improving your way around,

release your premise if necessary,

and ask the question, "What is the problem,

"who are my people, and what do I give?"

Because that's exactly what Jesus did for us.

I appreciate you.

I love you

I'm Michael. Jr.

(congregation applauds)

The Description of The Good Room with Michael Jr.