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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: The Sophisticated Liars of England (Tone of Voice)

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Hey guys! Today Im going to talk to you about how tone of voice and speaking style

can really deceive you, OK? So even if Im nodding my head and smiling nicely, it doesnt

necessarily mean that I have a good intent, and it doesnt necessarily mean that Im

being very kind and caringeven though it looks like it, doesnt it?

So tone of voice is a very, very good way to manipulate and deceive. And people who

are of that natureto deceive and manipulate other peopleknow how to use their voice

and their speaking style so that they get what they want to happen while still looking

like the nice guy. So my normal voice, which youve seen a

few videos before (if you want to go and check it out), is very flat, theres hardly any

expression in it; and over the years, Ive taught myself to become expressive in videos.

Both because its a performance for me, and I enjoy to do it that way, I enjoy to

express that way. But also because nobody would watch me if I just said, “Hey guys.

Today Im going to talk to you about tone of voice. And um, it can be very deceiving...”

You would be gone after twenty seconds. So I have to put energy and expression in, to

get you to stay watching and also because Im not doing any cuts or showing you different

things, I have to make my voice watchable. Otherwise, you would just go away.

But too many of us are just completely deceived and fooled by tone of voice. And that way

you can be so easily manipulated. “Always, always trust the person who speaks to you

in a kind, warm voice; always trust themtheyre such a nice person. Theyre so sweet, theyre

so kind.” But...the person who, who sort of got, sort of a little bit pissed-off kind

of tone, or doesnt speak very wellthose kind of people, they dont come across very

well on television. So theyre always seen to be wrong or not worth listening to, because

dont present what theyre saying in the right way. When really what we need to always

do is listen to the actual content of the words that are being said, rather than the

extra fluff over the outside. So we dont want to just look at the packaging; we want

to look at the product inside the box, before we buy, before we say, “Ah yeah, this is

right.” So one of the things that I, I like to think

of this... In England, I like to call themthe sophisticated liars of England.”

Because if you have a professional job in EnglandIm not saying everyone is a liarbut

if you have a professional job in England, at some point, youre going to come across

people who I callthe professional liars of England.” And I come across a lot...

I did some work in the sort of charity area. So they had their own style of speaking in

the charity area. And different professions will have their own style of speaking. So

lawyers would have their sort of style; um, people who work for the government would have

their own sort of speaking style. Always a little bit different.

But in a charity, theyre sophisticated liars. The always, always speak to you with

a really nice smile, and they say, “Oh, Im so sorry, Im so sorry.” And I remember

this face a lot, because, when I used to be applying for jobsand it wasnt just a

few jobs, it was a lot of jobsand after the interview, they gave me the feedback,

it would always be like this: “Jade, Im so sorry. Were really sorry. Youre such

a good candidate, but you didnt get the jobreally sorry. Its because you lost

out by one point in the interview.” And they have their piece of paper where they,

you know, they write down, very objectively, they write down about the candidates: this

one good, this one bad. But for whatever reason, basically, when they tell you No, they will

do the kind and smiling face, and it will always seem...and it will always seem like

you just missed out but, you know, they like you so much, and they like you so much.

Or you might experience it as some of my fans have, when you go to a doctor, of all places,

because youll be speaking to the doctor, and youll just think: Well, this makes...

The thing that I think I need, because of my health problem, it will be so easy for

you to give it to me now. Why wont you just give this to me, doctor? Ive showed

you, Ive showed you why I need this medicine or something or I need this treatment; Ive

showed you why. But youre just telling me No in a way that doesnt make sense.

Why are telling me No in a way that doesnt make sense? Your argument is not standing

up, but you just keep saying, “Oh, Im really sorry, its not...its not possible.

Its not the treatment we recommend...” In an earnest, it would be an earnest sort

of...earnest or maybe authoritative, more authoritative voice, if its a doctor, like,

No, its not possible in this case.” But whatever the case, theres some kind

of split going onbetween what you think is the reality of the situation, and the tone,

the tone of voice and the way the other person is speaking to you, to the point that it confuses

you, and it makes you think, “Well, whats going on? Im... Whats going on? Am I

banging my head against a brick wall here? This person is saying one thing, but Im

picking up a different message.” Also this can happen in your personal life.

I had the...experience, shall we say, of dating someone for a while, where I got the same

impression. I got the same kind of confusion, sense of confusion coming from them. Because

this person was like, this person was...had great packaging and would um, always seem

like, “Oh, I love, I love to treat my...I love to treat my girl really good...” and

blah blah blah, just seemed like, he seemed like, you know, the kind of guy that would

be a good boyfriend. But the actions...the actions, a lot of the time, didnt match

what he was saying. But he would always come back with an apology. But his overall presentation,

the way he would say things, and the way he would use his voice, or the way he would use

his body...body language, and ways to like reassure...which actually was to deceive,

was very, very confusing. So these...in moments...when this kind of

thing happens, an important thing to do, so that you can cut through confusing things,

is just disregard the tone of voice and the way that someone is saying something, and

just actually listen plainly to the words; and then see if the words match the actions.

Because if youre getting some kind of confusing split, its very likely that youre being

deceived by: either non-verbal communication, or tricks in the tone of voice. Someone is

telling you one thing, but indirectly the other signals are telling you something else.

Another point I want to make here is that through media, um, or the video that we see,

were very used to sit...having our...people, on the television, act in a certain way. Our

news, news reporters have to act a certain way. They have to be trustworthy. And our,

our um, Saturday morning TV presenters, they have to be sort of feel good and a bit positive.

And we always have to have them then acting in the same way.

And this is an acting performance; this is an acting performance. If you always see the

person acting in a character thats always the sameyou know, hes a nice guy, hes

a good guy; you can also be deceived by the voice of that person. Because you automatically

have trust for everything theyre saying. You automatically have trust for whatever

the news reporter is saying to you, because theyre saying it in an earnest and serious

way. And also, anything that the Saturday morning TV presenter recommends, youll

think, “Well, thats a good thing to buy. Im going to try that recipe, because you

said it was nice.” So, overall point being: Train yourself, if

you dont know how to do it, to actually listen to the words that are being said, and

put less regard on the tone of voice. A tone of voice that doesnt sound pleasing and

wonderful and seductive to your ears can be a voice thats telling you some important

information that you need to know. So, packagingpackaging is...packaging is um... Packaging is nice

to look at, but it can also deceive you. Inside that packaging, you might get a really rubbish

product that you didnt know you were getting yourself into.

So anyway, thank you for watching. And see ya later, guys! Come back soon! Bye...bye!

The Description of The Sophisticated Liars of England (Tone of Voice)