*WHAPOOSH* Top of the morning to ya laddies, my name is Jacksepticeye,
and welcome back to my nightmare, Cuphead!
The game where I sit down and say "Hey! Let's record this for a little while"
Three years later I actually have some progress made.
So... wait, there's something I want to do before I go anywhere else
*hums along with music*
People have been screaming this at me for the last two episodes,
but I had a lot recorded ahead of time
So I didn't get a chance to actually read the comments and go back and see, but there is
There's a coin in here
It was hiding! Apparently there's a lot more coins elsewhere
But I have no idea where they are. I do know that this...
is nothing.. I knew that that was nothing. No, the shortcut was actually over here
You could go up and around this
I mean, it's all useless to me now.
"Cutting corners" Hey, I got an achievement for that!
I do know that there's probably more coins hidden elsewhere around here
somebody did say Inkwell Isle has more coins on it.
I don't know where they are
Also, I need some air on my legs 'cause it's fucking warm in here
I'm not too bothered about finding all the coins just now
'Cause I feel like the stuff I have is probably what I'm gonna use for a while.
Can I swap you guys around? Yes!
Okay so I start off using that one. Nice!
My charm is a smoke bomb and my super...
I do have an invincibility super that I'm not too sure about yet
Okay we have a level, that's the end
oh nooo
OH NOOOO
Is that really the next boss I have to do?
Please tell me there's another boss that I can do before that
I don't want to have to fight the dragon
I've heard nothing but nightmare stories about fighting the dragon. I don't wanna have to do it
Okay, you talked about a shortcut, right?
Somebody was trying to tell me where the shortcut was for her. I actually don't know where it is
"Wally Warbles", let's go fight a bird. I'm assuming because it was a birdhouse.
Are you a bird?
Oohh, not one of these!
I fucking hate these boss fights. I hate all the boss fights.
Oh Jesus! AAH!! He's belchin' out eggs at me! fuck. fuck. fuck.
Okay, it's all about learning. I'm not gonna pass him the fucking first time anyway.
Where did that hand come out off?
Oh shit! Uh-oh!
Also I need to remember that I can actually go small in these
I can go small in these levels.
OH mercy!
"I own the air-- I fly where Eagles dare!" Okay
This is gonna take me a while. Hey his little thing has a face on it.
Oh wait. Now It's a giant face on it
*BIRD NOISE*
Here we go here we go
Are y'all up for grabs? Are y'all ready to go?
Shit
*makes random noises*
Oooh mama!
Shit
Shit shit. Oh Mother of Christ
That's a lot of fucking feathers. My mic is blocking some of them. Oh crap
no, mother of god.. Okay, we're doing this! BOOM BITCH
oh Fuck I'm so dead, one hit and I'm dead
I could go small
But when I go small I go faster and I ALWAYS fuck it up
Okay, nice. Nice.
Oh god. Now he's a fucking Tweety Bird. Oh Jesus
DAAAH, I didn't realize he was getting closer. How far was that?
Okay more than halfway! Not halfbad not halfgood haha
"My dad's the Brawn and I'm all the brains! Together we bring the pain."
You're a little PIECE OF SHIT
Yeah, it was the same when I was doing the Djimmie fight. People were saying
'Jack, you do know that you could have'- Oh God
'You do know you could have gotten smaller during the pillar sections?' but
When I go smaller I go faster, and I always end up hitting shit anyway 'cause I'm stupid like that.
Oh crap, oh crap. Ah, I wanted to get the thing..
I wanted to get the pink. Popow! Like that, nice. Nice.
Oh oh oh, mercy! Fuck. Okay, can you die at this section?
There we go.
Christ... oh christ
This isn't even that hard to dodge, but I know I'm gonna fuck it up stupidly
I should be at the top of the map where I can hit him easier.
Fuuck.. Agh man, that was stupid..
Woah there, Sonny Jim!
Okay, that's a confusing one...
Is that all you're gonna do? I really hope so.
No, it's not. Why would that be all you're gonna do?
Why would you- why would you be nice to me like that?
Urghhh, I even hit 'A'.
We're gettin' back into it, we're getting back into it.
I'm feeling it! Woo!
It's been-it's been a little while since I actually recorded it. It's been-it's been about four days
*Imitates Willies battlecry*
Use your fucking finger guns all you want, it's no use against Jackieboy.
Oh god. Ah fuu..
Dat's a retry there, Jimmy. I don't wanna be taking damage in ze first rounds
*makes noises*
This section isn't too bad. I feel like I can actually dodge this shit. I'm not gonna jinx it. nah-uh
No, sir! There we go! Now I'm saving up the BIG booms for Big Brain Bitch
BOOM BITCH, what's up? What's up you big turkey?
Motherfucker.
You firing your lazer beams at me? Oh, not today sonny boy.
Oh fuck. Oh fuck
Yes! okay, what's next? Last phase? Bring it on. Oh god he's dead..
What is this? What is this? Oh jesus fucking christ
What's happening?
How do I hit him??
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.
Ah, his heart comes out!
Oh shit, shit, shit, shit, don't die now
Oh I have to- ahhhh, I have different bombs! I forgot!
I could have been do so many dams...
*Howl of frustration*
Okay, different plan of attack, here we go!
There we go! There we go.
FUCK! YOU!
Ah this- that- there's a fucking- That does a way different thing.
Could I have actually killed him!? No I didn't. God. I didn't know what s-
His head turns into a trashcan?
Really?
I forgot that the different bombs have a different fucking power up move, I was stupid...
I was stuuupid
Ahhh. Pink. Okay, here we go
Be smart about this!
There we go.
Ow shit, oh shit, oh shit. Can you guys move away? Why are you guys so close to me?
Man..
Nice!! a-woa! Yeah, salt and pepper that bitch!
Ahhh. Keeping my power up for the end, that was what worked.
Hahaha!
Nice!
Oh fuck yeah, okay another one in the bag
Feeling good about that.
'Cuphead!'
Oh, over the Rainbow Bridge. Wally warbles is no more. Dead.
That wasn't even that hard a boss fight actually, that was just...
time consuming, 'cause it took a long time to get to the end phase each time.
And I didn't have, like, I wasn't prepared for the end phase. I didn't get to practise it enough so...
Once I actually got there I was able to do it and...
Okay, Imma do the regular level, "Funhouse frazzle", because the next one, is the dragon.
I've been- I've been fearing the dragon.
Oh yeah, this. What the fuck? What the fuck? Jesus Christ, I'm not- I'm not ready for that
Can I actually kill you? Are you a killable thing?
You fucking are!
What was I wasting all my time for then?
Just take your time there Jack. Okay.
ni-ni- nice and easy, nice and easy
I- I- fucking no way of getting up there. Shit!
My god, can you just
Why am I not able to hit this fucker?? Okay, just use this one.
Fuck that noise.
I ain't about that life.
Oh god, I can just walk straight through your mouth?
I don't like it when you're not enemies I can't kill...
Christ... stay alive Jackaboy
Oh god, oh god, oh god. I'm dead, I'm fucking...
Just go, ju- fuck! How far is that? That better be...
More than half way. I can deal with that, that's a thing I can deal with.
much fucking easier
Are you honk honking at the top?
Yeah, you fucking better be!
HONK HONK! HONK HONK!
Yeah, that's what you get
Ow!!
Just go, just go. What? what?
WHAT THE FUCK?!
Think I'll take my chances with the Dragon...
"Grimm Matchstick, Fiery Frolic" Okay...
Here we go, here's the end of my life everybody. This is the beginning of the end for Jack.
Oh god... Oh god, I have to be on fucking clouds all the time?!
Well that's just horseshit!
Oh god, oh god... Huah!
*cries*
I don't like this! Ahh, did he use his fucking tail?
Yeah, duck it duck it duck it fuck it
How can you avoid that shit goin- Oh My
Oh My OH. "Don't m-m-misunderstand my flames. I just meant fun and games." Sure you did...sure you did
Motherfucker
Imma just do this. This is where the real bullshit begins
It's like Ribbit and Croaks again.
It's the- It's the fucking tail that gets me, I keep forgetin' that he has a motherfucking tail!
Oh jesus fucking christ... do that! Oh, what now? What now? Why?
What? What the?
What the fuck?
oh come on! COME ON!
I got more than halfway on my second try!
I think this is doable mi amigos
Enough with the tail, okay?
It's fine guys
It's fucking fine
Ow!
FUCK YOU!! You little matchstick pricks
It's okay. Can I stand on his tongue and kill them? That's the question I want to know.
You ain't so tough
*yells*
Okay, can't do that, can't do that. That's not a thing I can do.
Help, help! Help!
Oh! Ah! Fuck! cunt
I forgot that when you hold down and you jump it does a down jump.
Should be obvious, but does my brain know how?
NO
It's fine. FUCK YOU!!
Fuck me
*yells*
OOOOOooooohhhhhh- very sexy shit.
That didn't even DO much to him...
I don't like it, I don't like it
That way the bullshit
Hahaaaaagh, okay, okay? I did that section, I did that section.
Wh- what is this? Okay, milk him?
Milk bottles!
I'm deaaaaad
Oh that was the closest so far! "One two three! You'd b-b-better flee!"
HahahahHa huh huh... *frustrated noises*
Patience, patience is all I need. Okay, here we go
Shit! Shit! Why- why'd I do that?
Oh g- I fucking hate that phase!
Oh, I could have even had a chance, if I didn't fucking use my super when I had nothing underneath me
Ah, that was a silly mistake.
Okay, I'm back in it
These first few phases are like a piece of piss now
Aaargh..
Changing tactics. I'm using invincibility this time instead of my superpower strong thing
Ahhhh, hit boxes why?
I wanna see if that actually makes the last section any easier.
Okay, first phase is done. No problem. This phase should be able to do without getting hit. Hopefully. Maybe.
Okay... FUCK YOU
It's okay, we did it, we did it, we did it.
And then you become invincible and you just kick some ass
Oh, that does not last- that does not last long at all, does it?
I cannot
AAargh! Oh come on! Now I see why...
I see why this shit is bullshit now...
AAAAAH! OH!
It's not even that hard
I think I need a break from Señor D-ragon
Ooohh... All I have to do is this.. which I guess I could do, this doesn't seem so bad anymore
Ehm, I wanna get a different shot
Maybe if I find a secret coin I think I'll get four
so, I think the 'lob shot' is gonna be really handy for this.
I saw some tips saying that the 'lob shot' actually works really well on the on the dragon guy.
I need four? Yeah.
*Sean mimics the pig* Goodbye!
a-ha secret coin!
Hello my friend. Okay
I had to look up where another secret coin was 'cause I wanted to get four
because what I'm gonna is get the 'lob shot'.
I have heard that the 'lob shot' does better against the dragon
Because you could just stand on top of the clouds and fire down at him
I don't know how true that is, I think I'm still gonna suck a fart
But you know what? We might as well try it out.
I have something stuck to my foot!
There was something stuck to my foot, I didn't know what to do. I almost DIED!
Okay, let's do this! Uh shot 'A' will be the 'lob shot'. Okay
*sings along to music*
Oh, I can't get to him from here. Okay, let's just take the long walk of shame all the way back to Dragon land
All the way back to Señor Fucko
Does my 'lob shot' do more damage?
What's it saying? "Medium range and good damage with a slower rate of fire." Okay.
Good damage! It's not saying 'average damage', it's saying 'good damage'.
I'm really excited about this!
Okay... nice!
Wooo ooh ooh ooh oh, Oh, Bessie!
Ho! Am I doing ok?
I honestly have no parameter.
Oh yeah, that's- that's doing a LOT more damage
Now you can just stay here and do this.
Aargh! Oh man..
This section fucking sucks!
Why do some of them split and some of them don't?
Makes no fucking sense! Ow! Oh shit... please tell me I hit him with that.
Please tell me I hit him with that
YES! OH, OH, OH MERCY ME! OH HALLELUJAH! I fell and died.
Oh, it still counts! OH!
*laughs and woops*
Oh, Thank you online tips! You have saved my life. And my marriage.
My marriage to this fucking game
Was that all of the bosses defeated in this area? Can I actually go on to world 3 now`?
Well, I think I can.
Can I? What's up, King Dice? What you got for me? What you got for me, bitch? Yes.
*starts singing* ♪Do - boo boo hoo - ah♪
♪I'm Mr.. King Dice I'm the game'st in the land♪
♪I-......
♪I'm the devil's right-hand man♪
Okay
"Looks like I mighta underestimated ya Cupface."
"You gave it to them debtors but good!"
"Go on over to the next Island. Lotsa fun times waitin' for you there, ha ha ha!"
♪Haven't worked, I sent you asleep♪
'Don't you mess with me!'
"The little- The little mugs got some fight in them."
"I'll say that much. They're makeing mincemeat outta them debtors!"
"You see, I knew there was something special about those fellas."
"Well, don't be too sure just yet boss. I think there's somethin fishy about those two!"
"Don't blow your wig dice. If those two little fink's try anything... I'll be waiting!"
Okay, you know what dudes? I'm coming for your ass.
I think there's only one world left. I think this is the last world...
"Honeycomb Herald" No! I have heard that that boss is also a big old bunch of bumbleshit.
Anyway, I'm gonna leave this episode here. That feels good, I'm glad I'm actually making progress.
So many people out there were like 'Jack's bad at video games. Jack can't play games well'
Well look who's here. Still can't play them well, but I'm making progress
I'm actually further than I ever thought I'd be. I might actually be able to get to the end of this game
with enough patience, and dedication, and time!
It can be done.
Anyway! Thank you guys so much for watching this episode.
If you liked it CUP that like button in the head, LIKE A BOSS!!
and, high fives all 'round! *wa-poosh* *wa-poosh*
but thank you guys and I will see all you dudes...! In the next video!!!
*Outro is "I'm everywhere" by Technoaxe*
(Captions by the Jacksepticeye community)
Cheers! Oh, I deserve a drink.
