Practice English Speaking&Listening with: The Shorefather

Difficulty: 0

- BDS is in the building.

[all shouting]

- I missed you, my guy.

- I'm not having this day ruined.

Hey, Chris, it's Jenni.

It's, like, a really good day for her.

She's going dress-shopping.

- I'm happy that Jenni had my back.

I really do appreciate that.

- Let's go dress shopping.

- That'd make a good movie.

The evolution of Mike,

where he was to what he is now.

- What should we call the movie?

- "Shorefather"? - I think I have a better one.

"The Shore-Shank Redemption."

- All right, so "Shorefather," it is.


- ♪ Get crazy, get wild

Let's party, get loud ♪ - Yeah, buddy!

- ♪ If you wanna have fun, then do something

- Party's here!

- The Situation is under construction.

- This might not have been the best idea.

- We're so classy now.

- On the seventh day, it'll be lit.

- Get the frig out of here, you crazy!

- Um, hello?

- ♪ If you wanna have fun, then do something crazy

- ♪ Make me lose my mind

Not afraid of falling when you're grabbing these arms

- So today, we're gonna do dress shopping for Angeliner

because we need to start this wedding stuff going for her,

because she's not doing it by herself.

You ready? Let's do this.

It'll be fun. Whoo!

Dress shopping!

- So let's start with, like, his not-so-great moments.

- Yeah, man. I think we should definitely

make this, like, a real movie.

We want to make a movie and then present it to Mike

in, like, a premiere party fashion

where he's the star of the show,

we all get together and just have, like,

an awesome movie night in the yard.

When he used to lift up his shirt all the time.

- Girls love Guidos.

- And he used to wear his sunglasses low.

- Snooki, girl, why don't you just, like,

break up with your boyfriend and let me

rock that world, girl?

[both laughing]

- I'll just grab the champagne. It's in the fridge.

- My worst one with Mike would have to be Italy.

- Yeah, 100%. - You know?

- What are you talking-- - Get the [bleep] up, bro.

- What are you talking about? - You're always talking [bleep]

behind my back.

- 'Cause he was so [bleep] up. - So long.

- Do you have any clips you think we should include?

- Definitely me throwing the bottle at him.

Mike, I'm not playing!

- Wow! - Oh, Nicole, Nicole.

- When I back-fisted Mike.

- Oh! - See what I'm saying?

- Well, I'll consider your notes.

Thank you. - All right, we're gonna go.

Take care.

- ♪ Get money, get money-- ♪

- I love dress shopping.

Are you excited? - I am.

- All right, so who's your maid of honor?

- Janine. - What's your history?

- Known her since I'm two.

She's been in my family. She's, like, third sister.

She's, like, ride or die.

- So nice.

- We're here already? Holy [bleep].

- We're here. So exciting.

- I've been going to Castle Couture for years.

It started way back in the day

when I got my wedding dresses there,

and Nicole got her wedding dress there.

Lauren's got her wedding dress there.

I feel like it should be turned into Jersey Shore Couture.

- I could definitely see you in something like that.

- Ooh, I love this place.

- Ooh, I love that.

- This is my best friend, guys.

- Hi. - Hi, nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

- My best friend Janine--

she's been through every breakup with me,

every engagement that has broken my life.

I've been engaged-- this is my third time,

but never, ever, ever got to the point

where I'm actually trying on a wedding dress.

Like, hallelujah. Like, it's a miracle.


- So you excited to see some dresses?

- Very excited. - All right, let's do this.

- Whoo!

- Like, where do you start? There's so many.

- There's a gown for everybody.

- Jesus. - Can I put you in something

that shows a little skin?

- I'm putting you in a princess ball gown.

- Are you against or for--

- My nipples would show in that one--

- Rhinestones? Ooh, nipples?

- No, no.

- Ooh, I finally get to see your nipple ring?

- No, no.

My dream dress would definitely be

something, like, more fitted

and something that would show off my curves.

All right, I'm ready. Let's go.

Oh, gosh. I'm nervous.

- Cheers to Angeliner.

- Cheers to Angeliners!

- I'm driving.

- How did you feel about all the other engagements she did?

Like, did you know it--like--

- I knew it wasn't gonna work out.

Everybody she was with wasn't mature,

so this, you felt it.

Like, when Chris and her-- and even their, like,

their communication, it's just simple, so, you know.

- Yeah. - Right.

- You ate the hot dog and didn't even ask me

if I wanted a piece, but then you--

- I didn't know he was gonna eat yours, too.

- Yo. - This is how Staten Island

people fight, guys.

They really love each other.

- No, that was nothing. Trust me.

- Oh, my goodness.

You know so much more than we do.

- Yeah.

all: Oh.

- Okay, swan.

- Sparkly!

- Oh, I love this one. - She hates it.

- You look like a saint, and you're not one.

- You look like a saint, and you're not one.

[all cheering]

- Oh, wow.

- Oh, you look so hot in that.

- That is gorgeous.

- Oh.

- Stop!

- Um...

- Does it take your breath away?

- It doesn't take my breath away.

- All right. So then that's not it.

- Next. - Janine?

Next. - When I walk down the aisle,

I want Chris to cry.

I want Chris' mom to cry.

- Ooh.

all: Oh.

- Nice, right? - That's friggin' stunning.

- This is an Angeliner dress. - I love this.

- I'm getting, like, teardrops in my eye.

This must be it. - You are?

- Yeah. - All right, this is the veil.

- Oh, yes, bitch.

- I love it! - Oh, wow.

- You look like an antique Italian doll.

- Yes.

- Wow. - So I love it.

- Are you gonna cry? - I'm gonna cry.

- Yeah, if you feel like you're gonna cry, it's the dress.

- I love it. - Oh, my God, this is it.

- I wish your mom was here. - Yeah, I know.

- Well, at least you have, like, your closest friend.

- Oh, 100%. I feel amazing.

- Then that's it.

- This is the dress.

When they say you know, you know.

That's the truth.

- So wait, are you saying yes?

- Saying yes.

[all cheering]

- Chris is gonna have a boner when he sees you.


- ♪ Did you feel alive? ♪

- Honeys? - Yeah?

- I'm so excited for the road trip to the Shore house.

I've just been invited back to the Shore house

for an unbelievably home-cooked meal from my roommates.

Can't wait to go.

I was thinking that we'd pack a little--couple things.

- Are you gonna stay over there?

- Yeah, I'll pack a couple things

and surprise the roomies. - Yeah.

- I'm gonna have to pack a lot of my supplements, honey,

because, you know--

- It's only, like, two days, though, right?

- It doesn't matter, honey.

I gotta stay on schedule, honey.

- But that's, like, a 60-day supply.

- I'm just gonna bring everything the way it is.

I'm gonna put all my supplements in here.

Gonna bring my multi. Gonna bring my fish oil.

Gonna bring my melatonins to sleep.

- Oh, my God. All of these?

- Honey, I'm living that clean life.

[funky music]

♪ ♪

- Honey, I'm home!


I'm home!

- Pauly knocky!

- I just crushed my DJ gigs.

What's up, handsome?

What are you guys having, a handsome contest?


And now I am back to see my family.

Did you guys miss me, is the most important thing.

And I need to find out what I missed.

[bleep] What went down?

- Angelina's pregnant.

- Vinny's the father. - Yeah, I think so.


No, we decided that Vin's gonna do a--like,

a montage, a video of, like, Mike's--basically, his arc.

- Oh, so cool. - Where he started from

to where he's at now. - That's so cool.

- We're gonna, like, make a whole movie

in the backyard, like, a movie theater.

- This is perfect, 'cause Mike's life is like a movie.

He's had a lot of ups and downs in his life.

Do we get popcorn?

- [laughs]

- Candy? [all laughing]

- All right, let's go bridesmaid dress shopping.

[all cheering]

- I bet that's really sexy.

- What about this, Ange?

- That's pretty. All right, try this one.

- I'll try that on.

- Casual. Sexy.

- Yeah.

Today was such a successful day.

- I love this dress.

- I found my wedding dress.

My girls found their bridesmaid's dresses.

- Are you you happy with everything?

- I'm so happy. - I'm so glad.

- And I feel like I'm one step closer to my wedding now.

All right, let's go.

- And Janine, it was so nice meeting you.

- Yes, it was nice meeting you, too.

- I hope we didn't scare you. - Never, never.

- I'm drunk.

- All right, ladies. - Aww, I love that.

- We're all friends.

- She's so awesome. - She's my protector.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- What a good day. - It was really good.

- I love you guys in these dresses.

It's so cute.

- Boys better have taken care of everything for the movie.

- Yeah.

- Oh, this is the fight, right?

You gonna put this on there? - Yeah.

- Oh, damn.

[indistinct shouting and swearing]

- Oh!

[rock music]

- Hello?

- Oh, hey, girls.

- Drunk bridesmaids. - Is that Pauly?

- Yay!

- Deener's drunk. - What's up, Deeners?

- We're drunk. - How are you?

- How's it going here?

- Good. - Good, good.

- We actually--we're almost done with it,

but the icing on the cake will be, like,

these little quotes from each of us,

so if you guys can, like, write down

something nice just to put, and I'll add it to the end.

- I don't know what to say.

- I could help you. Really good at quotes.

- ♪ I'm the truth, so I tell no lies

I'm a rider, you could look in my eyes

- Should we get our comfies on?

- Yes, please.

- [laughs] "Comfies."

[upbeat music]

- Angeliner? Yeah, you do it.

- Angeliner, we need you.

- Relax yourselves.

all: Whoa!

- Chill the [bleep] out.

Thanks. - Relax yourselves.

- My dirty little wedding. That's a good hashtag.

Hamster gets hitched.

- Dirty little wedding.

- You wish it was your dirty little wedding.

- Pauly's been saying this the whole time.

How come you didn't say anything to him?

- No, I haven't, 'cause I love you, Angel.

Fourth time's a charm.

- Watch this. Watch this.

I may say something. Watch how bad it is.

Yeah, fourth time.

- Vinny, you're not number four.

Shut your mouth. [all laughing]


Although, you wish and you have wet dreams about it, bro.

- I heard that, like, already walking down.

- So we're playing a game. I'm saying something,

and then he's saying the same thing to see

how much madder she gets when he said it.

- She doesn't get mad at him. - Oh.

- She gets mad at me. We say the same exact thing.

- You're an angel. You do it.

- You're an angel.

- Vinny, shut the [bleep] up.


- Oh, I love movies.

- We have a special premiere tonight.

- Oh, that is so dope.

- Here we go!

- I feel like a movie star right now.

- Oh, my God! Is it dead?

- Oh.

Oh, [bleep]. This thing's dead.

- Oh, my God.

- A tragedy happened.

- I have a 24-year-old boyfriend.

- Jenni. - Damn, Jenni.

- You little slime ball.

- Jennie's having a sexual revolution.

She's icing the vaginar.

Like, I've never even heard of that.

- Great time. - Ooh, [bleep].

- ♪ Way, too dope

Young boy way too dope

- I gotta start cooking.

- Is that gonna be enough food for everybody?

- I mean, I'm having one steak.

- I'm not waiting till midnight to eat.

Vinny cooks food like he eats food, barely,

and it takes forever for him to get the job done.

- What do you set it on, 16 hours?

What should I set my clock for, tomorrow?

- I'll put in your order.

Since Vinny tends to take a really long time on food,

like, if he starts now, he'll be ready by midnight--

- Like Ange's wedding, probably.

He'd be cooking for Ange's wedding.

- Oh, God. God forbid, I would die.

- Chicken nuggets? - Chicken fries?

- No chicken sandwich. - Chicken--no good?

- The original. - Four original.

- Jenni's using the Burger King app

because we don't wanna wait in line.

- Whopper.

- I want a Whopper.

- And a diet sodas.

- That's it?

- Okay. Let's go.

- All right, we're out.

- [bleep]. - Give me them tongs.

- What are we gonna tell Vinny?

- We're not even gonna say anything.

We're just gonna bounce. - He's gonna still be

trying to turn the grill on.

- Bye-bye. - You know how long he takes?

- See you later, Vinny.

- You should start cooking at breakfast next time

so it'll be in time for dinner.

Think that'll work?

- Cheers, meatball.

- Cheers.

- Mom juice.

- ♪ I'm a D-boy

- ♪ And I'm bouta make an addict out you, man

- What, do you preheat the oven two weeks in advance?

I mean, you know I got a show this weekend.

I'm not gonna be able to eat.

By the time it takes you to cook this,

I'll already be at my show.

- I really want my shake.

- What the hell? Jeez, you want some vegetables

to go with your salt?

I'm a backseat cooker.


Instead of a backseat driver.

Get it? Don't you get it?

Tough crowd. Tough crowd.

- That's so good.

Angelina, you have any-- both: Chicken fries?

- Yes. I thought you guys had.

- I do not feel bad for having

this Burger King in front of me.

I am starving, and I did not want to wait

till tomorrow to eat Vinny's food.

- Make a pact that we don't tell anybody

that we ate in this car right now,

because they're gonna get very mad.

Just saying.

- Oh, no!

[shrieks] [bleep]

[laughter] - Oh, my God.

- Oh, no!

I can't sit!


And we're back.

That's what I get for trying to be shady toward Vinny.

- That was hilarious. Oh, Jenni.

- These are gonna be the best vegetables

you ever had in your life.

- Guy cooks his Sunday dinner on a Monday.

[doorbell rings] Oh, [bleep], that's Mike.

Maybe that's the delivery. - Probably delivery.

- No, he doesn't knock. He just comes in.

- Yeah. - Hey.

- Hello.

- Oh! - Wow.

- Nice.

It's official now.

We have an actual movie poster.

Wow, these are sick. Look at this [bleep].

It's Mike looking like John Gotti for his movie,

"The Shorefather." It's perfect.

- I got some other things in the truck, too.

- Oh, yeah?

- Oh, word up. - All right.

This movie night is gonna be epic.

I mean, we pulled out all the stops.

- Cool. - That's for the VIP

so we can keep the hot girls in.

- We got movie posters, velvet ropes.

- Ooh, a red carpet. - We got a screen.

It's literally gonna be a movie theater

in the backyard.

- Grab the red carpet, Vin.

It's lighter.

- Hmm. If I was a theater, where would I be?

I should have flew in after you guys set this up.

This don't look like a theater.

I'm not exactly sure how this is a screen, but--

- Point it that way, yeah.

- Now we're talking. This looks like a screen.

All right.

- Oh, my God, a bunny!

- Oh, damn. - Stop.

[bleep], is it dead? - Oh! Oh.

- [bleep]. - This thing's dead.

- Oh, my God.

- Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, are you okay?

- Oh, it's a baby! Oh, my God!

- A tragedy happens. I think it's gone.

And all of a sudden, poor Deena finds a dead bunny.

Oh, she's the last person

that we'd ever want this to happen to.

This is horrible.

- No, this is, like, the worst!

- Should we bury it?

- Ugh.

This [bleep] bunny. Oh, I can't.

I mean, I feel awful for Deena

because I know she loves animals as much as I do.

- [cries]

- It's okay.

I want to die right now.

- Hi, guys.

- This sucks.

- Hi, Jenni. We just had a tragedy.

- What happened?

- [cries]

- This little bunny died.

- What? Are you kidding?

- I wish I was, JWOWW.

This is one of those times where I wish I was.

- Wait, Deena, are you crying?

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- [weeping]

- What are the odds?

We should all say a prayer.

- Do you want to bury it?

- Does anyone have, like, a shoebox or something

that we can give it, like, a proper burial?

- We'll bury it. It'll go into the earth.

We are gonna bury it, and it's gonna become grass.

- Okay, Pocahontas.

- And the antelope eat the grass,

and we eat the antelope, and we're all connected.

- I don't eat antelope anymore.

- Circle of life.

- ♪ In the circle of life

[choir vocalizing]

- Where were you, EMT?

- Well, I mean, I'm not an EMT for animals.

- All right, you pick it up. I'll dig the hole.

At least you know if [bleep] goes sour,

we could bury something.

God, what are we, mobsters?

Yeah, this is not a shovel.

- You know how long it's gonna take you to do that?

[upbeat music]

- There's gotta be a shovel. This is not working.

- I don't want to see it.

- You don't have to see it, D.

- Here.

- Nicole, honey, do you need help?

- Just this shovel's-- I need a shovel.

- Oh.

- It's a Snooki size.

- A hoe? A Snooki hoe?

- It's a Snooki hoe. - Thank you.

- We've done this before. - A few times.

- Buried a few people.

- That's actually pretty good. - I mean, that's pretty wide.

- [cries]

["Amazing Grace"]

- I never in a million years

thought that I would be making a bunny funeral.

- Should we say a prayer?

- This bunny deserves a right funeral.

- May he rest in peace.

- Yes. - Amen.

- Rest in peace, baby.

Bunny, I am so freaking sorry.

I hope you're in rainbow bridge with Jesus, and love you.

Okay. - [exhales]

- Father, Son, Holy Spirt, rest in peace.

- Good job, girls.

- Love you.

- Oh, gosh.

- D, honestly, that's such a long shot.

Just once in a lifetime.

- [crying]

- Good job, girls.

- Love you. - So sorry.

- [sobs]

- So you're not gonna-- you're not gonna teach CJ

how to tie his shoes now?

'Cause you gotta do the bunny ears and--

[all groaning]

- It's too [bleep] soon.

- Just do the loop, swoop, and pull.


- You guys wanna go set the stuff up?

- All right, honey, mind if I put these in the back seat?

- Yeah.

- Being back to normal with the roomies

was everything I could have hoped for.

Tonight, I'm gonna surprise the roomies

and sleep in the Shore house, and I couldn't be happier.

- Block my rearview mirror.

- Unfortunately, I'm not a light packer.

- Give me something. - Is there a dress code?

- These don't have batteries. - This is a red carpet event.

We gotta put the ropes up so not just anybody

goes on this carpet.

You on the list? What's your name?

- Vinny Guadagnino. - Vinny Guadagnino?

Nope, no on here.

- Ronnie? - Ronnie? You're good.

- All right, cool. That's what's up.

- [bleep]

- ♪ Give it all you got

- Oh.

- And that's how you get [bleep] done.

I got the popcorn machine.

Hey, look at Ronnie the candy man.


- Lauren and Mike could sit there.

- Straight to Jersey.

- I'll be excited just to get to the house

and be able to surprise everyone

at the end of the night

and ask them if we could sleep over.

- They'll be so excited.

- This is what I'm talking about.

Popcorn, candy, full-sized theater,

surround sound system.

This is gonna be the best premiere party

I ever been to in my life.

- All right, yo, we good? - Yeah, we're good.

- All right, let's go inside. Mike's coming.

- All right, honey, are you ready?

- I'm ready. - All right, let's go.

Oh, my God, it smells good. Do you smell that?

- What is it? - It smells really good.

Smells like someone is grilling.

- Oh, yeah, grill's good.

- Angeliner found her dress today.

- Oh. - Yes, it's beautiful.

- Shoot, they were trying to make me wear

ball gowns at first.

- She needs a lot of ball room, you know?

- You got a lot of balls, kid.

- What? Why do you always sit next to me?

- Yeah, why you busting her balls?

- Don't choke me out. I'm not Chris.

- All right, I'm choking you out.

- BDS is in the building!

all: Yay!

- We're in the kitchen! We hope you're hungry.

- He's in his comfies. - What's up, guys?

- Oh, I brought the comfies.

- I am super excited to see Mike and Lauren.

We're all gonna eat,

and the fact that we have a little surprise for him--

I'm really excited to see if he cries,

and I think he will.

- We had the Keto Guido on the grill.

- Yeah, it smells nice.

- All right, I'll go out there.

- No, no, no, no, no!

[overlapping chatter]

- Get in here. - What happened?

- Oh.

[overlapping chatter]

- Vinny, you're an idiot.

Like, you almost [bleep] the whole surprise up.

Literally this close to ruining the surprise.

This close.

- Are you kidding?

- Did Vinny ask you to help?

- Yeah. - What a bad host.

- Oh, my God, Vin, what's this? - Ooh.

- Some keto meals. - All right.

- Ooh, whoo! - Let's dig in, people.

- So who cooked all this food? - Vinny.

- Vincent. - Vinny.

- Vinny's, like, the new cook.

- You should probably have a cookbook.

- I should. [laughter]

Mike has no idea what he's about to walk into.

Well, Mike, we all put something together for you.

We have a big surprise for you outside

that we want to show you.

- All right. - I hope you guys like it.

- Yeah. - All right, cool.

- Oh, my God, I'm so excited. - All right, we going now?

- It's gonna be so cool! I love surprises.

- What is this? Oh, damn.

We got a popcorn machine out there.

- Oh, I love movies. - We love movies!

- We have a special premiere tonight.

We got you tickets to "The Shorefather."

- To "The Shorefather." - The premiere

of "The Shorefather."

- It's your premiere party!

- Oh, that's so dope. That's so dope.

- Man and woman of the hour,

if you would, this is a red carpet event.

- Thank you, sir. - You're welcome.

- Mike, Mike, Mike! - Garcons, where do I go?

- Mike. - You guys on the list?

- Smile.

- I feel like a movie star right now.

- So this is a premiere before the movie even came out.

"The Shorefather" is not even in theaters yet.

- This is dope. - Pretty dope, right?

- It's the Gotti look. - Yeah, it is.

- BDS is there in his court suit.

This is the dopest gift I've ever gotten.

My friends never cease to amaze me.

What--is it cease--seize?

- Cease. - Cease?

- Mm-hmm. - My friends never cease

to amaze me.

- This is your seat, front and center.

- All right. - This is awesome.

- I made this movie, so I want to give a little speech.

[clears throat]

Well, Mike, this is the--

- Speech, speech, speech, speech!

- This is the premiere to the--

- I'm embarrassed. - Guys?

- I'm embarrassed. - Oh, God, here we go.

Another one of Vinny's speeches.

- You guys should see the party favors.

On the way out, everybody is getting a horse's head.

Thank you.

I'm here all night.

- I can't.

I'm embarrassed.

- Okay. [laughter]

- [bleep]. - Okay.

- Boo!

- Oh, God.

- Start the movie, douche!

- Hurry up! - Come on!

- Here we go.

- "The following preview has been approved for all Guidos."

[laughter] [all shouting]

- Here we go!

- Welcome back, Mike! - All right, "The Shorefather."

[all cheering]

- "The following preview has been approved for all Guidos."

[laughter] [all shouting]

- Here we go.

[dramatic music]

- You've heard of "Goodfellas."

- Hey. - Paisan.

- Forget about it, huh? - You've seen "The Godfather."

- I swear to God I'll [bleep] beat an Uber driver

to death if I [bleep]--

- But on the mean streets of New Jersey,

there's a story about a man--

- This is The Situation right here.

- Like you've never seen before.

- I don't drink.

I don't drug. I don't smoke.

I don't even drive fast anymore.

But food? Give it to Big Daddy Sitch.

- Here's the true story of a man━-

- I'm the glue of this family,

and I try to keep everybody together.

I mean, you can hate on me all you want to,

but what can you possibly say to somebody

that looks like Rambo with his shirt off?

- They call The Situation.

The good times.

- M... - V...

- P!

- It just so happens that our initials are MVP,

Mike, Vinny, Pauly, MVP. - We were cool.

- And we are most valuable players in MIA.

- Bada-bing, bada-boom. We're all good.

- ♪ Beast Mode

- [bleep] serious?

- The bad times.

- Who's gonna be the bad guy?

- Situation, no problem.

- Don't say, "I got your back," 'cause you don't have my back.

- Oh, my God. I do have your back.

- Oh, Jenni.

- I love you. - Shut the [bleep] up!

Be a woman! - Shut the [bleep] up!

- [bleep] you! [bleep] you!

- Jeez. - Mike, I'm not kidding!

- Wow. [all groaning]

- [groans] - The struggles.

- Bro, you're 27 years old.

I would never want to be like you when I'm 27 years old.

- Really? - Yeah.

- MVP's dead. Like, I mean,

he's around us, he's around us.

We acquaintance ourself with him,

but to be honest with you, it's VP.

- Damn. So I'm lying?

- The worst friend that I've ever had!

- [bleep]. - For doing that to me!

- It's either leave or change.

- He can't. He can't.

- There's a good guy and a bad guy in a movie,

and in this house, no matter how good I am,

I'm never seen as the good guy.

I'm always seen as somebody that's gonna be bad.

- And the redemption.

- Ladies and gentlemen,

we'd love to welcome back The Situation.

[crowd cheering]

- I've been waiting for this for a long time.

The Situation has arrived.

- What caused you to stop?

- Well, I just realized that my way wasn't working.

- He's sober, positive, clean,

like, just taking on the world,

and I'm just honored, in a way,

to be there to witness Mike

finally shut the door on his old self.

- God...

all: Grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change.

- Mike, you're my brother,

and this Mike that you are now--

it's always been you.

You've always been this Mike. We lost you for a little bit.

We got you back. I'm very proud of you.

- Yeah! - Cheers to Mike.

- Heck yeah! - We love you, Mike.

- Want to hit me? You want to hit me?

- You can knock him down--

- [grunts] - Stop.

[bleep] stop!

- You all right? - He got eight months.

Mike got eight months. - Are you [bleep] kidding me?

- Oh, my God.

- "Jersey Shore" star Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino

sentenced to eight months in prison.

- But you will never keep him down.

- The judge happened to make an example of me,

but I'm gonna be an example

of strength, courage, and faith.

I feel like Rocky against his biggest challenge right now,

and I know at the end of the day,

I'm gonna come out victorious.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- Mr. and Mrs. Michael and Lauren Sorrentino!

[cheers and applause]

[dramatic music]

- Hey. - Hey.

♪ ♪

- Released September 12th.


- That was the trailer.

- Yeah!


- ♪ I'll be there when the sun goes down

- Oh, that was awesome.

- Did you like this? - It was beautiful.

It was--it's the best gift that I could get.

It's awesome. - Aww.

- Some of the clips in the movie were painful,

but I had to go through

some pretty tough circumstances.

I had to almost lose everything

to gain everything back,

and I've walked oceans to be this person,

and that's a long way.

I love you guys,

and I will be with or you guys for the rest of our lives.

- Same. - Love you too, Mike.

- Oh, this is what we all wrote to you.

- ♪ But I'm at a place in my life


Locked loaded, I squeeze, no hesitation

Walk a mile in my shoes, you'll see why I'm confused

One life to live

- We love you.

- The last ten years have been a roller coaster

of ups and downs.

A lot of the times, there's not a fairy-tale ending.

Actually, most of the time, there's not,

but having my roommates stand by me,

it just gave me the strength

to get through that very, very trying time

and a very, very emotional situation,

and I am so grateful to have them in my life,

and now,

going forward to the next ten years,

I have friends that I call family,

and that means the most.

- ♪ We're all that we have

- I love you guys. - Same.

- Yup.

- That was awesome.

- I am in my feels right now, okay?

I am not crying. You are.

- Can we play it again?


- ♪ I want to feel everything

♪ ♪

- ♪ Do you know who you are? ♪

Do you know who you are? ♪

- You like the movie? - Oh, yeah, it was dope.

Can I get a copy? - Yeah, I got you.

I'll AirDrop it to you. - All right.

- I'm so excited.

- Bring in all the candy. Bring in all the candy.

- We just had the premiere of "The Shorefather."

- Did anybody notice Angelina is really quiet?

- 'Cause she's sober.


- Already I'm hearing that my trailer

is getting Oscar buzz, so that's a good thing.

- It was unbelievable.

- We're gonna have to add to that

once you guys have some children.

- Yeah. - Oh, definitely.

I can't wait to do that.

- Hey. - Wait, so the last time

we were all together was the dude ranch.

- Oh, my God, is that the last time we were all together?

- Yup, it was the wedding.

- Wedding.

- No, the wedding was the last time.

- The wedding, the wedding. Yeah.

- Oh, my God, so much has happened.

- So much. - Yo, there was this big fight

in Point Pleasant.

I don't want to bring up bad times,

but this was mad funny.

It's time to catch Mike up

on everything he's missed in the past eight months.

So it was like the JWOWW and Angelina

had to, like, air out their [bleep]

'cause they had, like, mad stuff going on.

They were beefing. - Recently?

- Oh, [bleep], yeah. This was, like, a month ago.

- They get to, like, dinner, where they finally just--

- No, no, no, 'cause she's like--

we're all having fun. Then she's like,

"I have a problem with you," as in Vinny,

and then she just looks at me and she goes,

"And I have a problem with you."

- It's him and her.

- The [bleep] you calling me-- [all clamoring]

- Out of nowhere. - Angeliners?

- And I'm like━- - Yes, I did.

- "Oh, okay."

- I didn't want to start it again.

- Girl, you should have brought your glass of wine.

- You need a glass of wine, bitch.

We're talking about it.

all: Oh! - Relax, Deena.


If I don't want to drink for one night,

I'm allowed. Don't [bleep] with me.

- Oh, my God, I'm not telling you you have to.

- That's not nice.

- Maybe a bad idea that we did this.

- We were joking.

- Well, you really obviously-- you guys do--

- Welcome back, Mike.

- Right now, it's just the squad being the squad.

Is this what's been happening since I've been gone?

- Yo, yeah, every night for eight months.

- And I'm like, "I'm home."

- Calm down. - God. Jesus.

- Fight. - Little drunk.

Whatever. I'm allowed to [bleep] drink.

I don't really get drunk anymore.

It is what it is.

- On a serious note, on a serious note--

- What is going on?

- Okay, but I've been gone for eight months,

and it seems that I've been missing a lot.

- Oh, you have. - So I'm hoping--

I'm hoping that you guys could catch me up.

- Catch him up. - Catch me up a little bit.

- So what I was trying to say before is, like━-

- Yeah, yeah.

- They had this fight. It was, like,

Jenni and Angelina. They were just going at it.

Meanwhile, we're trying to stop bottles being flown,

and she's confessing her undying love to Ronnie.

- No, that's not true.

Ronnie's my [bleep] true friend here!

He's the only one that treated me with respect here!

- Enough. Enough.

- Don't go at Ronnie, and don't go at me.

- It was the craziest thing. I swear to God.

I'm not exaggerating. Am I exaggerating?

- I blacked out.

I don't know. - Same.

- Anyway, that was one fight you missed.

- I have a 24-year-old boyfriend.

- Jenni. - Damn, Jenni.

- You little slimeball.

Mike, her sex is amazing. - Oh, my God.

- She was icing her vagina last time I talked to her.

- Let me see it. - When you went away,

she never had sex.

Now she's, like, a fricking sex addict.

- Her vagina had cobwebs on it before you went to prison.

- Very dusty. - Oh, my God.

Oh, God. - Bats came out.

Poof. - Yeah.


- Jenni has been born again.

She's having a sexual revolution.

She's icing the vaginar.

Like, I've never even heard of that.

- Great time.

- Mike, 24 had a threesome

with Jenni and Angelina in the club.

- Oh, that's what the fight was about--over.

- That's what the fight was about.

- That was the rumor. - He was like this.

Wait, go between my legs. - Reenact.

- Yes, reenact. - You two reenact.

- On the floor. - Stop.

- And be blacked-out drunk. - Stop.

- This is Jenni. She's blacked-out.

He's dancing with her.

He's, like, choking her out and [bleep].

He's like, "[bleep], the things I'm gonna do to you later."

And then at one point, he goes like--

Angelina's next to him. He's dancing, he's like...

- [laughs]

- Get out of here. - Is that really how it was?

- Yeah, and he's dancing with both of them.

[upbeat music]

- And then he was like-- - Stop it.

- No. - Stop.


- Mike's leaving.

- Good day. both: Great to see you.

- I'm gonna surprise these guys.

- Yeah. [doorbell rings]

- Hey!

- I was wondering if my old bed was still open.

- You're sleeping here?

[all cheering]

- ♪ Say hello to the villains

They just mad 'cause we winnin' ♪

- This is [bleep] wack.

Why the [bleep] are we even doing this?

- 'Cause he hasn't been here for eight months.

all: Oh!

- We already-- [laughter]

- Oh, my God. I feel like I missed [bleep]--

- We're not done yet. - We're just getting started.

- But wait, there's more.

- We met Trump three weeks ago.

- Wait, how-- - We tried to get you out.

- Free Sitch! all: Free Sitch!

- Donald!

- Straight on TMZ. They're like,

"Mike, you're on TV."

I was like, "Oh, my friends. Oh, my God,"

and all of a sudden Deena just face-plants in a pile of mulch.

I was like, "Oh, my God." [laughter]

- We are about to free Sitch, bitches!

- Ow! - [laughs]

- Come on. - Are you okay?


- [bleep], I can't.

I didn't see that [bleep] fence.

- Oh, Deena fought with me, too.

She said I'm the most boring one in the house.

- Oh, you missed that. - I mean...

- Vinny and Deener.

- I got jumped. - Does anyone object--

- Yo, they jumped him. - I got jumped.

- We just don't like that we see you

having such a good time, and then when you're with us,

you just are like, "I'm gonna be miserable."

- Good time doing what?

- When you're at Chippendales, you put on a show.

- It's two different things. One I'm sitting in the house,

and one is a live show where I'm in a play.

- Oh, it's a play. Oh, Chippendales is a play now?


- He's in a [bleep] play.

- Oh, my God, you are just-- - That's not normal, like--

- I'll object because now he's out of the state of ketosis━-

- No, now you're fine. - You're a really good time.

- Vinny, you're a great time.

- Thanks.

- I missed out on so many moments

in the past eight months.

I'm hearing all this drama and all this chaos,

but there's no place I'd rather be.

- Besides that, nothing really happened.

- [laughs]

- Same old [bleep], different house.

- I haven't laughed this much in...

since the last time I saw you guys, probably.

Seems like you guys haven't changed a bit.

- Nope. We're the same.

- Yeah. But we have to go.

I have to get home. I have to go see--

- Moses. - Moses.

You guys have no idea that tonight was just awesome.

The video-- - I hope you loved it.

- Yo, the catch-up, though?

- Yeah. - Yo, the catch-up

between all of us was just awesome.

- Are you sure you want to come back?

- All right.

- All right, Mike. Mike's leaving.

- Go home. Make some babies.

- No. - Good day.

both: Great to see you. - See you later.

- All right, honeys. Bye, guys.

- Well, I'm ready for beds.

- Honey.

- And she was happy. That was good.

It's good we did that.

- The movie night was a success.

The premiere party was great.

- I feel like he loved it.

- He had so much fun, and he was crying.

- We took him through eight months.

- He's probably like, "Put me back in."

- Dramatic. Very dramatic.

- "Get me away from these people."

- I'm gonna grab these suitcases.

- Yeah.

- I'm gonna surprise these guys.

They're not gonna be ready for this.

BDS is in the building.

Turn up. Let the fist-pumping begin.

[doorbell rings]

- The [bleep]? - I think Mike's back.

He must have forgot something.

- Yo, no, this is, like,

stranger danger [bleep] at this hour.

- Who would ring the bell right now?

Hey! - Hey!

- What are you doing over here?

- I was wondering if my old bed was still open.

- You're sleeping here?

[all cheering]

- Mike's sleeping here!

- Hey! all: Hey!

- You are? - Yeah.

- The house feels complete now.

It feels like every family member is home.

- Are you really sleeping here? - Yeah.

- Yo, you already knew that. You got your old room back.

- Oh, my God! - Yeah!

- That's awesome.

- Yay!

- I am so excited to be back with my best friends

and my family once again.

- R. - S.

- V. - P.

all: Smash squad!


- ♪ I only know to live fast and die young

And represent where I'm from

- Wanted to know if my old room was available.

- You got your old bed back?

- I want the wifey to have the full experience,

but do you want me to-- want her to share a room

with Ronaldo?

- Yeah, I don't know about that.

- What, the full prison experience?


- Yo.

- Lauren might regret this decision

to stay the night because Ronnie is Mike's roommate.

- Have fun over there. - Have a good night.

I don't know how they're gonna room with Ronnie.

- How is a girl gonna share a toilet bowl with Ronnie?

- Exactly my point.

- We can't even survive Ronnie.

- No, no, they can't do that.

There's gotta be another way.

- You're good. You're clear.

- I feel good.

- I know you went to treatment and whatnot,

but I've been out--I've been in prison for eight months.

[both laughing] So I kinda missed some [bleep].

So I don't know what happened.

You know what I mean? - And, like,

I would've wished for me not to be in prison

so I could be there for you.

While I was in prison, I was always thinking about Ron

because Ron is in for an uphill battle

for the rest of his life.

In prison, I wasn't able to be there for Ron,

but now, I want to be there for him.

- It's been a good change.

Hopefully in a better place than last year.

- I'm glad you learned some stuff,

because some of the mistakes that I made

when I went to, you know, treatment a couple times--

I went to treatment, like, three--

- Yeah, yeah, I remember. - Three times or so.

Maybe four. [both laughing]

- I can't really remember. - Maybe four.

Before I really got it,

but my mistake was, I really didn't listen when I went,

but, you know, if you went and you listened

and learned some of the tools to live,

you know, your best life and be your best self,

it's invaluable.

- Me and Mike have similar traits.

I think we both have seen the bad and the good.

You know, I feel like maybe that's why we butted heads

so much, is 'cause that we were kind of alike.

It's a better life, bro. I just feel better.

I'd like-- - You're experienced.

- More clearheaded, bro, like, you know?

- Yeah. - It's just--

[bleep] wasn't working, bro.

Instead, you gotta try something new, right?

Mike is such an inspiration

because he turned himself around.

The fact that he's been through everything he's been through

and he can keep a positive attitude no matter what--

I want to be like that. I want to be that happy.

- And I want you to know that you can call me for anything.

- Of course. - You know what I mean?

'Cause I have been through very similar shoes to you.

I'm very proud of you, man. - Thank you, bro.

You too, bro. - Come here.

- You're, like, a G, bro. - Proud of you.

- Family, bro. [bleep]. Appreciate it.

- All right?

- It feels good to have my old roommate back.

You know, it feels good to have,

you know, my friend and my brother.

- So we're gonna stay in here with Ron?

- Uh...

I guess.

I think that Ronnie has changed

a little bit since I've been gone.

Ronnie has learned from some of his mistakes.

Just hope that Ronnie stays on that track.

Good night, Ronald.

- Good night, Michael. Good night, Lauren.


- Good night, Ron. - Oh, God.

- ♪ Up above the clouds

♪ ♪

We're flying up above the clouds

- Hi, Angelina. - Hello. What's up?

- Awkward. - [laughs]

- Angelina, shut up. Don't say one word.

Oh, my God, we buried an animal in someone else's backyard.

- Is that legal?

- We need to dig this bunny up.

- It's this. - What is that?

- No, that's not it. - It is open!

[all screaming]

- Oh, it's open!

- [bleep]

The Description of The Shorefather