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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: QI S17E06 Series Q HD - Quests Part 1

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to the fair realm of Qi where this day we sally forth upon a quest with our

mates quadruple all hail the valiant and mighty Sir Philip the Jupiter's

audacious Alain Ducasse lady Alice Levine

and the night on the tiles Allen Davis

ha miss G to their nightly noises so Philip the Jupiter's goes so alum dakar

goes goes Alan goes

right draw your swords and prepare for combat can't actually move at this

something it looks nice only weirdly

through the show he's here we go I feel drained with his head out the car with

you can take the mop no how do they wear glasses in the olden days they hadn't

invented glasses in the old house I'm gonna struggle on this show shall we

start the show and do a question what's this man's name

darling done quick Tsotsi sound well the X is a shirt technically because he was

speaking old Castilian in the book and it should be done

he shooty shooty but I think we could say Quixote don't you it is Don short

for something like Donald or Donner yeah like the dog yeah quiche ot that sounds

like an Irish order doesn't it el evocation 14 actually technically he's

not build any of those things because the protagonist in the book is called

Alonso Quijano so Don Quixote is a name he makes up for himself when he loses

his marbles and assumes the character of a medieval knight lots of people argue

it is the world's first modern novel where do they argue o heroes in prison

actually which it to be a good place to write a book and it was an immediate and

roaring success in the novel done with it goes mad because of reading it used

to be believed that reading or what they called excessive contemplation was

incredibly bad for you and it caused the most astonishing range of illnesses so

if you read too much you could get all of these things according to dr. Robert

- Burton gout Qatar's wasting indigestion colic crudities vertigo

consumption and wind the menu in a gas stroke I mean an exciting new hipster

coffee

gout and wasting or at camp but colleagues at home so nice to be with

another Alan because Alan's look this at the white rhino they're going extinct

there's only me you and Alan Titchmarsh going did you know that there's no over

Alan you think the me been on the telly there'd be a few more but I very much

Alan but I think you being on television is not going to encourage the breeding

of children

backstage with Alan I know it's your first time I'll be very

in the paper stamp on me glass is value

collecting for Alan's pride himself had quite an adventurous life he was in the

Spanish army during which he got shot three times he's got a sword in him

there he lost the use of his left arm he was kidnapped and held captive as a

slave for five years he was arrested three times he was excommunicated three

times I mean he really had the most astonishing life is he from Albert

Square that's a sort of nasty Nick and oh yeah what's the most thankless job in

history with being a mum surely you have to say thank you to mummy now we won't

get any biscuits

I put the raisins into fruit and fibre

bits you were only in charge of the raisins yeah they came in a big box

that's Hitler I didn't put them in individual

which I've gone to school I was once working at a record company and someone

had to record out with a lyric in it that mentioned mr. Potato Head and so I

was asked as a promotional device to carve faces into a hundred potatoes okay

most thankless job in history comes from ancient China so we're gonna get back to

400 to 100 BC and there were people called yuusha and they were on a

constant quest to rescue anybody in trouble and to help the poor that they

hated being thanked because they were too modest in fact it was part of their

fundamental beliefs that you should never receive praise so they are almost

the equivalent of the knight errant which is what Don Quixote was really

modest or were they like no please don't please don't please so there was one

called chicha and he saved hundreds of people's lives

but whenever anybody thanked him he couldn't bear it Eve when he saved a

king's life he refused to ever see him again just in case he was thanked it was

absolutely part of who they were as a period of time in China is the two

hundred and fifty year period of warring States and lots of dynasties were

fighting for control in the end the dynasty called Qin finally one that's Qi

N and that is where China gets its name from from the Qin Dynasty so you can see

this area down here on the left that only lasted for about 15 years but in

these times of untrustworthy government instability people turned to these more

self-sacrificing you sure Knights to dispense justice instead what's the

lowest camping experience you can think of yeah that's Glastonbury two thousand

six or seven that was the year when there were police divers going into the

tents looking for bodies oh they didn't find any so so right between camping and

a soup from Wagga Mama's I look like to be once yeah and I got

absolutely paralytic I I woke up on the floor

someone must have trodden on me because I had to someone had stabbed a fuck out

of my face

but that was annoying can I be

I'm talking about the lowest campsite in the world it is 1.6 kilometers down

inside the deepest cave on earth in Georgia the krubera cave this is

obviously not open to your average camper ah this is a genuine picture from

the inside of the cave it is 13 kilometers long it is over 2 kilometers

deep and it can fill with water really fast with absolutely no warning

whatsoever nevertheless people go camping down inside this cave so in 2018

56 cavers from seven different countries spent four weeks down inside they were

sleeping 6 - a tent and for fun they would dive down into sumps which are

sort of freezing they're freezing cold passages submerged under water and

squeezed as far as they could down these extremely narrow passageways for weeks

can you imagine how much is it for a family of four it's not for me what do

you mean it's not for you you're a perfect size for underground living ok

that Kurt always santak said it there's any sumps Stewart or we get your

little car make sure you come back we'll have lovely big cheese for you my

defensive you went cheese not that I would come back the cave is called the

terminal sump well I know Ukrainian diver who could go and have a look

Gennady samokhin and he holds the record for the deepest time so far 52 metres a

terminal sample why would you do that to go any further done he'll Cindy Cindy go

further in help Amy kara camping is a pastime first documented way to reckon

early Victorian early Victorians it's British so it yeah it is the Victorians

absolutely loved it there was a great boating crane so it was up and down the

Thames and some baits even converted into floating tents the person we have

to blame as a British tailor called Thomas Hiram holding he's regarded as

the sort of father of lightweight camping as a boy in 1853 he and his

family went across the United States by pioneer wagon across the prairies and he

absolutely loved it and has inflicted on the rest of us for the all eternity that

we have where's a pussy bow is not genuinely camping like I feel like

they've got an inflatable mattress in there he's got heaters he's got hot

water bottles well he he rather hilariously produced the campus handbook

and under meals suggestions he provides recipes for blancmange and lobster salad

come out

and had a crisp sandwich in attempt is it

he has rode there on dry land is quite impressed it's not much of a tent he

sold it to a or just after this photo

camping these days can get seriously intense from the deepest quest on earth

to the highest what do Everest summit errs come down with I was offered the

chance to walk to base camp when I did one day's training on Hampstead Heath

and declined in October when you can even go to the top and the rest of the

it's 400 mile an hour winds and minus 60 all school groups to go you peptic you

and people get really bad tempered then many fights that break out as people are

waiting black eye by the sounds of it if everyone's right

one of those pens with Sir Edmund Wow Hilary so the demesnes tanks on at

Everest they call it shoe milonga and the employ in fact 30 Porter's their

sole job is to carry poo down the mountain yes it's further down the

mountain do not leave your poo up there well no in fact if you do climb up now

the Nepalese government do they require you to bring down 18 pounds of rubbish

and that includes other people's poo or you will lose your 4,000 dollar deposit

just over 26,000 pounds of human excrement is dumped at base camp

well the poo ever overtake the Nepalese porters who carry it all down they are

astonishing they they use something called an humble oh it's a sling that

goes across the forehead and on average the male porters can carry ninety

percent of their body mass and this female porters as well they can carry 66

percent as one porter who can carry twice his own body weight Hilary went

back to the Himalayas lots of times after climbing Everest he led a but the

Nepalese government has Yeti hunting rules you have to pay for a permit it's

the first thing you have to a photograph or capture it and not allowed to kill it

and you have to turn it over or turn over the photographs of any sightings

whatsoever I like the idea that Edmund Hillary's there at the press conference

and this is what we're looking for and there's a bunch of Sherpas in Frederick

up oh you mean Keith

he said and you see no hat

you can tell all the center parting do you think they would have saw lots of

ones a little side parties like that's not the one I'm looking for

if we cannot find the Yeti we will settle for the lead singer of Herman's

Hermits

how did Britain's greatest national treasure get here

taxi

crown jewels for the crown jewels the Cullinan diamond world's largest

diamond ever found cool like a molar fuck a mint

it's about the size of an orange so if you imagine the average diamond is about

the size of a seed and you compare that to the Cullinan diamond it was

absolutely massive was discovered in 1905 in the coal mines in South Africa

probably the most valuable object in the world at the time now as you said is in

the crown jewels and so obviously they want to get it to London just some

enough to pocket it well what they did was they wanted to make sure that it was

safe so they rather ceremoniously pushed in a package and they locked it inside

the safe of a steamboat so there was a team of detectives and all those things

making sure this huge thing was absolutely safe in fact that package was

a decoy and the diamond arrived in London safe and sound

I registered post take a stamp on it be alright because I just imagine that poor

man walking all the way down the mall going oh god livery for the coin

well it was taken immediately to King Edward the seventh to inspect in fact

the diamond went unsold for two years and the government of Transvaal

eventually they bought it after the equivalent of 15 million pounds today

and they wanted to give it as a gift to the king but the government wasn't sure

but Churchill was the Colonial Secretary he said absolutely we need to take this

and because I'm buddy was so grateful in Transvaal to him for doing this

Churchill was given a replica he used to put it on a silver plate and show it off

at dinners to guests I think I do that you take it to the king and the king

would inspect it but I mean I'm presuming he doesn't know loads about no

diamond I mean what's he looking for I don't know I would have taken it to

David Dickens HS Samuel well she did have to find somebody who was good with

diamonds and the people who really knew about it was the Asha brothers in

Amsterdam and again they made a big song and dance out of it the Royal Navy took

the box across the North Sea in fact Abraham Asha took the Dimond I put it in

his pocket and caught the train and went by train and ferry all the way please Oh

his brother Joseph studied the Derman a plan to cut for weeks and weeks and

weeks four days before making the initial groove he did a thing that the

cutting knife and the knife break rather than Rhode Island I mean it really was a

massive thing he spent nine months cutting it into nine major diamonds and

ninety six what they call what do you want it to say so Collins won it is the

rate star of Africa that is a top of the scepter and Cullinan 2 is in front of

the Imperial state crown there the major components that Ruby there is black

Prince's ruby the largest one in the world not cut properly just given a bit

of a polish now ond the quest for true love who would be interested in this

dating profile stocky build short bald bolivian male moderate

drinker never been in a previous relationship definitely wants children

that's basically me

it should be a human no obviously it's not aq oblivion

yes creature beginning with a Q it doesn't begin with a Q well it's in the

wrong series we are on a quest to find this creature a mate it is a very sweet

story the story of Romeo they say when cos frog so he has been

living in a tank in Bolivia in the good Cham bomba Natural History Museum and it

was thought that Romeo was the last one in his species so the last one of

species is called an end ling and from 2018 his conservation has set up an

online dating profile for him on match.com in an effort to find him a

mate and here is the video that they made for their search hi there

I'm Romeo they say when cos water frog from Bolivia I'm a pretty simple guy I

tend to keep to myself and not spending nice at home he also loved eating then

again who doesn't who could resist right who could resist had good friends to do

that didn't want to do it himself Miguel oh you're going video for me

whether you get catch in the world tiny arms the fro is not possible for me tall

the phone big piece of pepper a phone is it worked

loads of frogs died Turner

they went out on a frog-finding expedition they found three males and

two females and he has now been paired with a female who they have obviously

named Joo Joon it exactly right she because then call Romeo this

photograph was taken of me and my modern jazz dance club

dancy Bolivia must never smile

you're completely wrong about Romeo's personality cuz they put him with Juliet

she's really energetic she loves to swim she eats a lot she

keep trying to escape and she is driving me on the wall doesn't like how there's

no such thing as shine it has an application it does it like when he's

acting as if he's shown only one final challenge remains frog gallant knights

as we trepidation to the treacherous kingdom of general ignorance fingers on

buzzers please which is the closest planet to earth

No

Kamri yes absolutely rice it is mercury but it's not how we normally think of it

so the minimum distance between the Earth and Venus is 24 million miles if

you have a look at this this is how we generally think of it

yeah well it is in sort of space terms the minimum distance to Mars is 34

million miles and to mercury it's 48 million miles so you would imagine that

it all goes like that and everybody stays in the same lineup however that is

not how orbits work so let's have a look at this video which explains it a little

bit more initially it looks as though mercury is the furthest away but the way

the orbits function is that Venus often is right the other side of the Sun

making it really really far away and there's a guy called Oliver Hawkins

and he wrote some computer code to try and work this out and he found that the

planet that spends most of the time closer to Earth and any other is mercury

so it's closest to Earth 46 percent of the time Venus was closest 36 percent of

the time and Mars only 18 percent I think I did say all of that yeah

mnemonic to remember the planets yes it's Mercury Venus doesn't count is

actually a Disney character so many volcanoes emit mulberry germ sandwiches

under normal pressure or my very easy method just speeds up naming planets so

there were I couldn't get past vagina though

moist vagina expected night just steamed up nighty

so so weirdly that's probably the one I'm going to remember

anybody else Alice we've got one mine's quite depressing okay mom's vacant

expression means Jane sulks and last noticed wow you're a Johnny girl at

school my favorite is Mary's virgin explanation made Joseph suspect upstairs

neighbor

what was that Buddha is no longer regarded it's now a dwarf what is the

name of this sword Excalibur that suppose when he got Excalibur's the one

later yessss of the Lady of the lake the money

pulled out the stone is called current foreign piece he pulled it out of the

stone shortly for buying his first pair of trousers that's what they're all

laughing at and we end with the quest for eternal life so it's a Talon of car

your final challenge upon me on the table lies the chalice of eternal life

prithee select the one true Holy Grail and bring it to me oh it's my hats oh

yes of course like Indiana Jones I don't like him

Charlie Hungerford from Belgium

do it right so you are looking for the Holy Grail which one are you going to

select what's that Indiana Jones one where it thinks that Jesus is couple be

like the golden one but it's the modest one and it okay so what you reckon well

ah I think it's the wooden

here is the thing you should have picked the trade tray is the Holy Grail

a Grail was most likely a serving dish so would you please bring me and none of

the cups whatsoever I think one of those beanbag padded bottoms if I could have

that please done in the web Braille comes from the latin grand ale grail and

it means a deep platter that you would serve food objetivo banquets it

gradually evolved from the sort of Middle Ages onwards into people thinking

it was a larger vessel of an elaborate cover and then a drinking cup

traditionally the idea is it gives immortality to the drinker although the

Bible gives no special significance to the chance and that Jesus uses to

consecrate his blood wine well I'm afraid you picked wrong but you look

very fetching in the Hat I would love to see a camp indianature a Braille

actually looks like this which means a Holy Grail looks like this I'm working

my ass off which brings us to the scores in first place with minus one it's

filmmaking a fantastic debut it's uncle

grace is appraising - 15 Alan

with -18

farewell to my liberal nights Alice Alan Phil and Alan and me till we meet again

let us dwell upon this questing quotation from the late great knight of

the realm Sir Terry Pratchett so much universe and

so little time good night I'm back for a new series and

for the first time ever I will be joined by a different esteemed co-host every

week I'm delighted to say that Mark Ronson has agreed to take up this

challenge on our opening show join us for lots of great music and chat later

with Jools Holland on BBC 2

The Description of QI S17E06 Series Q HD - Quests Part 1