- whoo! - Whoa!
- We get to give a motivational speech,
- Welcome to Good Mythical More.
- to someone who just found out their grandpa was Bigfoot.
- Listen, listen, first of all, Jane don't panic.
Uh, he's still your grandpa, right?
If you have a child, it's gonna be larger
than every other kid.
- That's a good thing. - It's gonna have
really big feet. - Yeah.
- You'll have to special, they'll have special shoes,
and, two penises.
- Oh (crowd laughs)
- I'm so sorry.
- Is that-- - It's just what bigfoot have.
- Is that how big feet...
- Oh, that's what they meant by big feet.
- Yeah (hands knocking)
(crowd laughs) - Oh.
- Two p- ,two penises (laughs) - Come,
- Coming and going. (pouch thudding)
- Wow, Jane.
I was just gonna tell you that your granddad was
the man who dressed up in a suit.
- Yeah, lets not dispel that. - because Bigfoot isn't real.
- Wow - But you know what?
- We found out something much more important.
- Go with the two penises thing.
- Yeah, uh, I didn't know that about them.
- I know a lot about the sexuality
of all mythical creatures.
- I think that's sharks, actually.
- You can make up anything (Felicia laughs)
- I think it might just be sharks.
- Uh, snakes.
- No, actually all snakes have,
yes, two penises. - Yeah.
- Well most sharks do.
- Mm, what?
- Do you know what percentage of birds species have penises?
- They have cloacas, which is a hole that they
poop and pee and have
- You see what Rhett did? - have sex in.
- He pivoted the conversation to something
he knew something about.
- Yeah, you don't know anything about sex penis,
I mean shark penis.
- Sex penis. (everyone laughs)
- You don't know anything about that.
- Both are true.
- Sex penis (Felicia laughs)
- You know nothing about sex penis.
- But non-sex penis I'm an expert.
- Okay Rhett, what percentage of birds don't have a penis?
- 3% of bird species have penises,
and 97% don't have penises.
- They have cloaca.
- Yeah, it's actually like an evolutionary mystery.
- I thought it was cloaca.
- I think - I'm from Alabama.
- Yeah, I trust Felicia on this.
- That's deeper south than us, girl.
- But their ancestors all had penises.
It was penises everywhere,
and then most of them lost their penises,
and so you know, watch out, watch out birds.
Watch out the 3% of birds that still have penises.
- We have some (everyone laughs)
astronaut ice cream that we're gonna sample here.
- Yeah. - Okay.
- Um, so, we're gonna come back to this neopolitan,
and we're gonna, - That's, that's fancy.
- We're gonna start off with some cosmic brand,
not a sponsor, ice cream for adventure.
We each get one of these.
- Wait, are these the actual kinds that they take,
or these are just like brands of
- This is people that just
- This is marketing.
- Rip it off? - First of all,
- Okay. - they don't actually,
- I don't know.
- they don't eat any of this.
- They don't eat ice cream?
- Astronauts don't eat. - Nah, nah, nah.
- They don't eat up there at all?
- No, they just wait until they get back.
They got work to do.
- That's not right.
- No, I'm so busy, I just forget to eat.
- Oh, look at that.
- This looks delicious.
- Oh, it looks good.
I love cookies and cream, mm.
- Now it's just for camping, and stuff.
This is for driving around, or at L.A. traffic.
Here we go.
- I mean, it, it doesn't really seem like ice cream
at all, to me.
- Oh, it's good! - It just kinda,
- It's kinda like, you know, that honeycomb stuff
you get in Britain?
The honeycomb candy?
- I've only been once.
- You've only been once?
- Yeah, recently and we didn't eat that.
- What did you do there?
- Speaking of slugs.
We ate at a place called Slug & Lettuce,
which was the worst meal I've ever had in my entire life.
- I mean, not surprising, but what,
- I heard that the candy was good.
- The candy there is really good.
- Is this fall in that category?
- They have this honeycomb, I can't remember the name
of the brand, but it's like a golden spun sugar,
and it's crunchy like this.
This is delicious.
- But, I don't consider this ice cream.
- I mean,
- Well, yeah, 'cause it's dehydrated, man.
- If I was in space I might consider this ice cream.
- There's cream, sugar, skim milk, wheat flour,
so not gluten free, alkalized cocoa, sunflower oil,
chocolate liquor, liqueur, vanilla, sea salt, guar gum,
- Oh guar gum - Now were getting
to the great stuff.
That's the thing that you're tasting.
- Yep. - Yeah.
- Now don't eat the whole thing,
'cause we have others to sample.
- Okay, bye bye.
- Um, and you know what?
For the sake of preserving these
for the Mythical team to try later,
- Yeah, don't open all three.
- Let's just, let's just, - Yeah.
- let's just all eat from this one.
Ice cream for adventure, number two,
organic double chocolate chip.
- Okay, well.
I mean, - So, who would eat this?
Like what is the occasion that you would eat this?
- It's backpackers.
It's people who want - Break.
- a lightweight - Oh, too much.
- A lightweight meal.
- Oh, you can split that.
- You ever, like, gone out into the
(ice cream snapping)
wilderness looking for a Bigfoot and his two penises
and, you've got like,
- Ahem, yet
- You want to pack everything that you're eating
on your back, you need things that don't have water content.
- I've only, I've only, I've only hiked once in my life.
(ice cream crunching)
- Where'd you go? - Really?
- I was in Honduras, and I climbed Mount Celaque,
- Okay. - which is like the highest
Mountain in Honduras, and it has a cloud forest at the top,
but we only had one day to do it,
- So we just like ran up top and then came back down,
and I had to - Was that a bad experience?
- I had to poop in the woods,
and I felt the indignity was too much for me
to ever bear again, so I've never hiked, again.
(crowd laughing) - Wow.
- Oh, really? - Yeah.
- What'd you wipe with?
- I mean, I brought toilet paper,
but then you gotta bring the toilet paper with you,
so I brought a bag, I researched--
- Just for a day hike?
- Well, if you gotta go, you gotta go, man!
- I've never taken toilet paper on a day hike.
That's pretty awesome.
- What are you gonna do?
You just like free ball it?
- I just wait until I get back down. (snickers)
- To wipe? - It's a day hike.
- You just hold it.
- You can't do that to your colon, man.
- Well, I got lots of problems,
and that's the least of them.
- Yes, I think he has.
- Holding my poop for, - This,
- Well, he's got two colons.
- (laughs) You got two colons?
- Yeah. - So, we're look,
- He's from Bigfoot. - Oh look, there we go.
Highest peak in Honduras. - So you climbed,
So, what on this, where on this picture did you poop?
- Um, (laughs), probably around midpoint.
Uh, you know, - You were going up,
or coming down? - Eight o'clock?
Eight o'clock, going up.
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm a morning pooper, - Yeah.
- so around eight o'clock (crowd laughs)
and, uh - We on the sunny side?
- Sunny side.
It was sunny, yeah.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You don't wanna go on the dark side. (laughs)
- (laughs) You don't want to go poop on the dark side.
- Well, you always wanna poop down mountain.
- Yeah. - Oh, yeah.
You wanna face, yeah.
- So it's like - You want the gravity not,
you don't want the gravity go under.
Yeah, that just-- - 'Cause it will roll.
- This is good. It's fun.
- Okay, um (pouch thuds)
next we have, (pouch thuds)
ice cream for adventure, number three.
- Are you sure you're not sponsored by them,
'cause we're doing all - mint chocolate chip.
- the different flavors.
Yeah, okay. (laughs)
- Yeah, why are we doing the one brand.
- We just said that so we don't
have to share the money with you.
- Oh, okay. (Rhett laughs)
- No, we're not sponsored by them.
- Oh, look at that.
- I really like their packaging, not sponsored by.
What, what is the - Break it.
- What is the flavor here?
(ice cream snapping)
- Mint chocolate chip.
- You gonna have that whole thing?
(ice cream snapping)
- I mean, the reason why this isn't a sponsor,
is 'cause I don't like it, and I'm saying that.
(Felicia laughs) (crowd laughs)
- It wouldn't be something, - It's just,
- I would ever want to eat.
- Unless I were in space, I guess.
They get desperate up there.
- It's okay. - It doesn't taste like
you're eating ice cream.
It tastes like you ate ice cream.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, think about it.
When your done eating it, you're like--
- Have you ever had - I just had ice cream.
- Yeah. (laughs)
- What's the, uh, what's the stuff that
tastes like ice cream, but it's not.
It's made out of cream.
- No, that's not what I'm thinking about.
- Semifreddo, Semifreddo!
- Never had that either.
- Never been to Honduras. - Dude.
- No, that's pasta.
- Never pooped on a mountain.
- You've never pooped on a mountain?
You just hold it in the whole time?
- I've pooped in the desert.
- Alright. - Neapolitan.
- You're supposed to bury it six inches.
- Did you?
(package tearing) - Oh yeah.
- Yeah, I've pooped in the desert.
- Oh look, this one has another wrapper.
- This is a different brand.
- I marked the location with my phone, though,
so I can return to it at anytime.
- Is it like, uh, geocaching with your poop? (laughs)
- I wanna see, if like, a cactus has grown out of it.
- Or a beanstalk.
- That's my poop cactus.
(Felicia and Rhett laughing)
- A beanstalk.
A magic beanstalk.
- Oh, that's a - climbed a poop stalk
to the, oh, look at that guys.
- That's beautiful. - That's a whole,
ice cream sandwich.
- And look, - That's selling itself.
- Let's do it, who wants strawberry?
- I want strawberry.
- There it is.
- Yeah, I'll have strawberry.
- Who wants vanilla.
- I'll take vanilla.
- How's that?
- What does that leave you with?
- Chocolate, chocolate.
- It leaves me with chocolate.
- It's a pale chocolate, though.
That doesn't look good.
- I don't like biting ice cream
- Oh. - When it's bonafide frozen.
- Oo, that's, - This is better.
- It is a little crispier, but the
artificial strawberry flavor is turning me off.
- The interesting thing is, - Really?
I like that - I also don't like
biting this, for like a similar reason.
Something about the texture of it.
- It's very hard, - You don't like biting it?
- It feels, yeah.
It's very hard.
It feels like your gonna, like, chip a tooth.
- It's so satisfying to bite.
- I recommend, just putting it in your mouth,
instead of chewing it, just--
- Let it dissolve.
- Let your saliva just infiltrate it.
- I think the cookie, the cookie really makes this one,
over the other one.
- Semifreddo, - Okay, thank you.
- Is a class of semi-frozen desserts.
- Desert. - It's so good.
It's like warm ice cream in your mouth,
but it's like the texture of frozen mousse, you know.
It's like an ice cream cake, but warm inside.
- It messes with your brain, man.
- It's an ice cream, I love,
ice cream cakes my favorite cake.
- You gotta have a semifreddo!
That's the fancy, that's where Carvel stole it from.
- But it's warm?
- It feels warm in your mouth.
- Is it like fried ice cream, from Chi-Chis?
- No, no, oh boy.
- Okay, so this is just, - Okay
- Now all of a sudden, we're just eating,
- These are good.
- we're just eating bananas and strawberries.
This isn't ice cream at all.
This is a different theme, guys.
- Oh, we've moved to a different part of the box. (laughs)
- Anybody want this?
- The endless box of frozen items.
- There's just gonna be a small child in there.
We're gonna have to eat that small child. (laughs)
(upbeat music) - Probably.
- This is what the astronauts eat.
- Probably, okay.
Do they really eat this?
- Yeah, yeah.
- You don't know.
- It says official.
- I've got a few astronaut friends,
but I'm not at liberty to reveal their names.
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