Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Deep Cuts: Hasan and Ilana Glazer Discuss Abortion Laws | Patriot Act with Hasan Minhaj | Netflix

Normal
(0)
Difficulty: 0

I, like, learned this, whatever, statistic:

like, less than 25% of the people

in Alabama think this is a good idea.

Because theyre like,

Abortion is healthcare for women.”

So why is it coming into play?

Because those 25 white men and that one white woman

decidethe governor and the 25, like - eeehtheyre, like, grinning.

Its so scary.

Im like, “Why are you smiling?”

You know what I mean? Um, you are evil. You dont get to smile.

So...

You know Mitch McConnell smiles, though, right?

I dontI dont think so.

I mean, he works at it.

No. No.

He pulls strings and...

Yeahyeah!

What are you interested in that most people arent?”

I would say...the Sacramento Kings.

Are you a

Are you a Kings fan?

Or are you an Aggies fan?

Alright, alright.

So youre a Warriors fan.

Booooo! Boooo!

Im joking, Im joking, Im joking.

Go Aggies, man. Go Aggies.

Did you just graduate?

Thats great.

Go Berkeley?

This is like a UC fight.

What is some solid advice that has stuck with you over time?”

Actually the best piece of advice I got was from Tan France.

Uh, and he told me,

he made me try on all these ridiculous outfits,

and I told him I wasnt feeling confident in them,

and he was like,

Just be confident and itll work.”

So,

maybe one of these days Im gonna come out in a crop top.

Maybe itll work. Alright.

What is the most unbelievable New York experience

that has ever happened to you?”

Umm...

you know what,

Ive talked about his a lot before.

I think

I should just bring out

the most quintessential New Yorker

and see what she thinks.

Everyone give it up for Ilana Glazer.

Ilana Glazer!

Its Ilana Glazer!

Ilana Glazer!

I just got makeup on your hoodie. - Did you?

For when, my pickups?

I got makeup on your hoodie.

Oh nooo.

Yeah.

Its ruining the rest of the show. The shows over.

Remember those old R&B videos we would watch

when we were like growing up?

There was always that scene in the video where like

the boyfriend comes home and theres makeup on the

Yes! And the girls like, “Ughh!”

Or whatever, and its, like,

so typical and its also like

whos getting kissed on their clothes?

Right, right, right.

You know what I mean? Like its on your

face or body, and then you

wipe it off, or whatever. I dont know.

- Um, what– - Its like they wanna get caught,

thats my thing.

What is your most quintessential New York experience?

Um,

this, okay.

This is like so gross.

And this was, Im like 30

sooo gross.

Im 32. This was maybe like eleven years ago. So like

Im not the same.

Yes I am!

No, Im not.

Um,

but I once, okay, me and my friend, um,

were uh-

We went, we had this

there was this like

country night in South Slope.

And we went to South Slope and we, like, got

my friend John Mayer,

but his name is Jonathan Mayer its not John Mayer,

which sucks.

Ilanas like,

I hate people that are problematic.

My friend John Mayer…”

Jonathan. Jonathan Mayer.

Jonathan, Jonathan, Jonathan.

which sucked for him in college.

But umm, so John and I like went

we go to country night, and we get so drunk, and were like,

so gross, were like, were

peeing between cars.

And were like, you know, smokinlike in a nook or whatever.

- Ohhh. - We get, like, so

- were such idiots– - Yeah.

And we think were invincible because were like 21 or whatever.

And um, we go on the train,

and the train is coming every like

45 minutes or whatever?

And so were on the train,

and I was like staying over,

and I had my bag with all my shit, and

John is like *gags*

and I was like, “Oh no.”

And hes like *gags*.

And I was like, “Ohh fuck.”

And we, like, get to the station

and he runs out and pukes all over the platform,

and I run out to help him,

and then the doors close and the train takes off,

and my purse was in the traaaaain!

Sucked.

But it was also fine. I called my mom and I was like, “Mom…”

And she was like,

You idiot. I thought someone, like, died.

Who cares? Well go to the DMV. What are you, an idiot?

Dont scare me!”

Which is true, its like, its not that

- not that, um– - Does Jonathan remember that night?

Yeah. Oh yeah. We laugh about it.

Was it one of those nights

you know like when you go down to the train

and its like super balmy, and its like, gross?

- Yeah. It was like a summer night. - Ughhhh!

- Balmy. - Ughhhhh.

- And like, yeah. - Piping hot puke.

And you like smelled his puke that night.

- You know what I mean? - Ughhhhhhh!

It was bad.

Um, are you on tour right now?

So, um...no.

But youre about to go on tour?

Yeah. I just, um, I finished...

Im like having such a crazy time right now.

Broad City ended.

Which was...

a really good show!

My favorite show.

Um, and then I did this, um, film.

I shot this film that I wrote with my friend.

And we just like have been writing it for so long,

I cant believe its shot now.

And then Im going on tour and doing a special.

Why is it calledThe World is Burning?”

- ItsThe Earth is Burning,” right? - Okay.

- “The Planet is Burning.” - Okay.

Um,

because it is.

And I think it bears repeating,

until anybody gives a shit.

You know what I mean? Like why are we not talking about it all

- I can curse, right? - Yeah.

Why are we not talking about it all the fucking time?

Its like, so scary and what? You know?

I just, like

Its like

You know, its like hard to

Sometimes Im, like, good on Instagram

and then other times Im, like,

Peace, Instagram. I cant right now.”

You know what I mean?

But Im like, if Im going to, like, hashtag

shit and, like, post all the time

like, okay, I gotta do something that Im like

bears repeating.

Have you been vocal about

everything thats going on in Alabama and Georgia?

I havent. Im gonna just be

- I like havent– - Really?

Yeah, no. Im, like, paralyzed in

fear and depression over it

and I havent been, like, totally vocal about it because Im like

uuuh…”

I, like, go to post and Im like, “uuuh….” you know?

Im just like, this is so scary.

I watched only the first season of Handmaids Tale.

After it I couldnt bear it,

you know what I mean?

And now Im like…..

...you know.

And, you know, its like I say this from this

privileged position of someone who

I can get an abortion if I need one, and like,

you know, Im married and we talk about kids.

Like I

we would figure it out if we did,

- you know what I mean? - Right.

I was a nerd in high school so I didnt have sex.

So it wasnt, like, you know what I mean?

It wasnt, like, an issue.

- And Im just, like– - Yeah, yeah.

Its such ajust a thing that happens and people get

women getabortions anyway,

even if theyre banned

and this is just making it dangerous

for women who are already alive

versus fetuses who are not yet alive.

Im like,

you know. Its just, um, its so

I havent been vocal about it yetcause I am just, um,

Im pretty paralyzed.

But you were pretty vocal about, like, voter registration.

Like, youve been very

Yeah, thats, like

Yeah. With voting Im like,

IWhy is it so hard? Im, likesmart.

So, like, why is it hard? Why is hard for me to vote?”

Like, whereI dont know, like, where

IIIm, like,

researching and like a part-time job figuring out how to vote,

who Im voting for, what Im voting for and

its such trash that our system is not like,

Voting is dope! Heres how you do it!”

- You know what I mean? - Right, right right.

So I was just, kind of, sharing what I was learning.

So, whats the move? Like, with everything

I just wanted to ask you

with everything thats happening right now

A lot of times, something awful will happen and Im

Ill hit, like, oh Paypal Yellow Fund

there we go! Like, thatll solve something.

What is the move?

Do you think whats happening right now

in Alabama and Georgia is, like,

part of a larger trend or its an isolated incident in those

I think its definitely part of a larger trend.

Uh huh.

Um,

I think the move is definitely

if you have the money, give it.

Immediately.

Because money works and is, how our, like,

world works. And its, like,

Yeah, I wish I wasnt, like, sending money for this.”

But this is what the situation is.

So, yeah, that is also the move.

Um, I also think the move is, um

You know, its not like, people

I, like, learned this, whatever, statistic:

like, less than 25% of the people in Alabama

think this is a good idea.

Because theyre like,

abortion is healthcare for women.

So why is it coming into play?

Because those 25 white men and that one white woman

decidethe governor and the 25, like - eeehtheyre, like, grinning.

Its so scary.

Im like, “Why are you smiling?”

You know what I mean?

Um, you are evil. You dont get to smile.

So...

You know Mitch McConnell smiles, though, right?

I dontI dont think so.

I mean, he works at it.

No. No.

He pulls strings and...

Yeahyeah!

I mean, that, yeah,

but he doesnt have the muscles.

His muscles

The muscles have atrophied and he cant

But, no, I believe the strings are pulled for sure.

But, um, I think the move is to use -

Like, the system that we have in place is just being raped.

But the system is pretty dope,

so I think the move is to focus on the primaries in June.

So that the people

That we can, like, eventually vote for the people

who will not take away womens healthcare.

A lot of peoplesyeah.

It sucks.

- It sucks so bad. - As artists,

do you know a lot of people are writing about

People are publicly posting,

Im not gonna shoot my movie in Georgia.”

- “Im not gonna do this in Alabama. - Yeah.

Im not gonna bring work there.”

ImII feel a little conflicted about that.

Well it suckscause, like, the people of Atlanta are like

stoked and theyre, like, hustlinand like, the town

you know, the city is just groovinon making

so much stuff. But,

I have a movie that Im, like, putting together and

my director, like, sent me this,

you know, before it, like, came out

I dont know, before I saw it in the news, she sent me this thing:

We should move our movie from Atlanta

to New Orleans or just to New York…”

Im like, “I dont want to shoot there.”

Like, doing a movie in any place

or, you know, film and TV is, like,

such a huge advertisement for the city and

for the state that its in and

I just dont want to be there and support it,

but it sucks because like, there are people there

75% of the peopleare down for this

durr, obvious,

should-be-paid-for-by-the- government healthcare.”

So it like sucks to, like, punish those people

but I guess you have to

you have to make a move to make a statement.

Yeah, its interesting.

You know, like, I know the NBA very actively

with the bathroom bill stuff

was just like, “Hey, were not gonna,

you know, participate. Or were not gonna endorse this.”

Wow. That is so cool.

Yeah. Adam Silvers a great commissioner.

Eddie, didnt Adam Silver do that?

Remember with the

when the Bathroom Bill happened, was it

it was in North Carolina, right?

The All-Star Game, right?

And they threatened to

to pull the All-Star Game.

That is so cool.

Yeah. And so they ended up delaying it, right?

Adam is the commissioner, was like,

Hey, we dont stand for this.”

But Ive oftentimes thought

as artists, do we just bring the work there?

Do we try to change the culture there, from

Cause I know theres people on the ground

that would, like,

want us to be there.

That would be, like, “I would love for Ilana Glazer to be there.

I would love for Hasan Minhaj to come shoot his show there.”

It wouldyou know what I mean?

It could be, like, a lightning rod moment.

So, Im caught between this thing of like,

hey, do you... do you...

Yeah, but then the governor gets to be like,

All these cool movies are shooting here!”

And its like, “No were not, bitch. Like, no were not.”

Like, you suck. You fucked it up.

And now you dont get to party.

You know what I mean? Like.

You know? Like

People who, like, are racist and misogynist

- party poorly. - Right.

- And its like– - Uh huh.

[Laughs], “party poorly.”

And Im like, “You either earn partying with us

by being cool and not fucking women over,

or brown people over, or black people over,

- whatever it is.” - Right.

Or you dont get to, like, have the movie there.

- Or whatever.” - So what youre trying to say

I think

I think what youre trying to say

the NFL throws the worst parties, then?

Yeah. I mean,

if I watched I would be like, “Yeah!” but

I like their like costumes but I dont know much beyond

Cosyou mean the jerseys?

The jerseys?

- Their costumes are great! - No, the shorts.

No, I like the shorts in football, not the jerseys.

- The shorts...? - The, like, tight, shiny-ass,

like, shorts.

I like their shortscause you, like, see their butts

and like legs and stuff. Theyre

In football,

- dont they wear, like– - Yeah, theyre like, tights.

Theyre not, I meansure.

Tights…?

What areEddie, what are they?

Theyre, like, compression pants that go to your knees, right?

Im being, like, so technical, like Im a football player.

- Like 165 pounds. - “Compression!”

Theyre compression pants.

- Im an athlete. You guys get it. - He knows. Yeah, he knows.

Does anyone have a question for Ilana?

This is the funnest part, like, this is why I love doing this.

Thank you.

My favorite thing to do in the city is to, um,

get a little high and take a walk.

Ilana Glazer everybody!

The Description of Deep Cuts: Hasan and Ilana Glazer Discuss Abortion Laws | Patriot Act with Hasan Minhaj | Netflix