Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Let's Talk About Pregnancy in Australia | Advanced English Lesson

Trying to use this little selfie stick again, I remembered how good it was

Anyway, we're about to go out and get some muffins and coffee and

Kel had an idea, Kel had a pretty nifty little idea. What are you doing, Kelly? Why are you hiding? Come here

Cuz I don't want to show you guys the room, it's a bit dirty

So, tell us about your idea, you wanted to do

The pregnancy diary

You wanted to do a little pregnancy during where you can talk about it, you know, and this might not be helpful for many men out there listening

but hopefully it gives you some good vocab and as

Well some a learning experience for those of you who are thinking about getting pregnant in the future

Yeah, and I think people wanna see our little bump.

little bump? What's this Kel? Show us the bump. Is it a little?

It's huge. Look at that. Yeah, I reckon mine's bigger

Look at that much bigger. My baby's way further along than yours.

You're so competitive

Alright, so we're gonna go to Barwon Heads and get some muffins. Don't look at the room. Don't look at the room

As always, we're in front of the house walking to the car

But this time Kelly's here. We're not go to the gym, not today. So, where are we going Kel Kel?

To the coffee shop.

Coffee shop, coffee shop. There is an amazing place in Barwon Heads, called Starfish, right? and

It is...hold on, just let me get in the car

Get in Kel!

Yes, so It's called Starfish, it's really good, mum found it and it has amazing

muffins and even better croissants with pumpkin Oh

oh my god this is so good!

I love it, I just can't handle it.

Can't handle it today, huh? A bit pregnant, preggers, up the duff. A little bit nojenta

Prenha.

What does this mean?

Pregnant but in a very sort of...

Like cows get prenha

Okay. Okay. Alright.

We're off to Barwon Heads. We're off to Barwon Heads. So, how you feeling today? You've been a bit nauseous recently

Tell us about your experience being pregnant. How's it been? Has it been fun?

No, it's not fun. I mean

It is nice when you realize that you have a baby in you and you think about it and you buy things

but

Daily sort of... the struggle is real.

The struggle is real.

Like I wake up feeling sick every day

It goes on for the rest of the day, pretty much. If I'm hungry, I feel even worse, but then because I'm so

Nauseous, I don't feel like eating anything and

Even my favorite things like cheese or pasta like I just don't feel like having any food

That's the weird thing I think because you love those foods and you were eating them like an animal before you got pregnant

but now you just like

Do you think like is it what's putting you off them?

Is it the idea of what they taste like, the smell of them?

The textures, is there some specific aspect or you just don't feel like eating that food now?

I know some women

Get really sick like with smells and textures, I've been reading about it, but for me personally

It's just I don't feel hungry. I feel...well, I know I have to eat and I

Kind of get like okay. I really like cheese or whatever, but then when I'm there looking at it

It's just like, I don't want it. It's just like the pizza we got the other day

I had like two pieces and I was just like...

What did you order? You ordered a pizza and it was like half

peri-peri Mexican or some spicy thing and then half

What was the other half? Was chorizo or something

Chorizo like a margarita with a bit of sausage on it or something and you ate that but then you were like

This other one looks gross and I'm not eating it

And I love chicken, that's my favourite thing

It would have never happened in the past

Not at all, I would have started with this one because I like it so much

I dunno, that's the most weird thing that's happening. The rest is just fine

Like I know I'm not putting putting on a lot of weight yet

So it's fine

Not vomiting a lot. I feel really sick, but I don't vomit

You only vomited once. Yeah exactly. What happened then when you vomited the first time?

I think we were in the car, right?

Normally without being pregnant I get

Motion sickness. Yeah, you don't do very well in cars at least

When you're not...when you weren't pregnant, it would be like if we were driving around

Really bad corners, like if you go down the great ocean road, it tends to be pretty horrible. Yeah

Yeah

So, if you're going down the Great Ocean Road it tends to be... that's when I would get motion sick if we were going down fast

and you're constantly like

But for me it's so bad, I can't even use my phone in the car.

Normally, normally.

We were coming back from your grandparents place in Melbourne, yeah, which is about a two hour drive I

Just couldn't handle it anymore and I just puked

We were so close

We were one turn, one turn away from our house and

Dad was driving and Kel's like give me the bag!

And we're like literally a minute away from getting home and you puked in the car. Yeah in front of my dad

And then he was turning the fan on

Aircon up. Aircon up. It's all good, it's not easy

I can't imagine, you know, the hormone changes and feeling nauseous all the time

That would that would get to me. I think that was frustrating

Yeah at the end of the day you're just so tired of feeling so sick

Yeah, and I don't know if all the women experienced the same but I have every day when it's kind of like getting dark

around like six seven I get quite

Unsettled like I'm just uncomfortable

I don't know if it has something to do with the hormones or if it's just because I'm tired of feeling so sick

Yeah

but I just get really like I

Can't do anything like I don't if...in bed, I'm uncomfortable, if I get up to do something else, I'm uncomfortable

Yeah, you'd be finding it really hard to get to sleep, right? Recently and it's not the stereotype is that it's morning sickness

Which is what I assumed before you got pregnant like oh, yeah, you'll be you know

It's sick in the morning

And then the rest of the day you'll be fine

But it's more like all-day sickness.

All day sickness and I find it really hard to sleep. And which week did this begin at?

Probably...

Yeah, this

Was six weeks, I mean I'm 8 now, but six weeks that's when it hit me

yeah, and

Fortunately though it's only meant to last for five to six weeks

Usually yes, usually yes, that's what everyone's telling me.

Most women have been saying don't worry after twelve weeks

You'll feel fine again and you'll feel like superwoman!

Right now. It's really hard for me to imagine I'll feel so great, like...

but then we watched the a

I don't know if it's a documentary, but more or less a documentary on birth, childbirth yesterday and

The girl that was on there, the Indian one, was like I felt nauseous every day for eight months

So I can't imagine that feeling of being sick for eight months and then you know, it must feel pretty good once you've finished

Must be very good after you finish

Yeah, and you're like oh, I don't feel nauseous anymore

But everyone is telling us that you know after those first weeks

Something, you know happens and you just have great even your mom saying that you feel like you can do anything

so I'm really looking forward to feeling like that because right now is just really bad

So, how do you think it's changed your life? Your day-to-day routine at the moment if you weren't pregnant?

What would you be doing that you currently can't do?

I would probably be having a lot of soft cheese

No, but honestly

it's hard because I know there is something happening, happening inside me, but

You don't feel much different like physically speaking

Yeah, you know you feel sick and you feel you know, moody or something

Happens and you just remember

Oh, yeah

I'm pregnant

but you look at yourself in the mirror and you just like I'm the same and

You don't realize how much you're gonna change, your personality and stuff

So it's not... I'm still digesting

The whole thing

Like hey, I'm pregnant, but I do think...I haven't eaten for the whole day, for example

And I know like I would definitely go to bed without having anything, but I'm like, you know, I have to eat

I think that's one of the most difficult things, right? Is that you're

Constantly don't... you constantly not feeling like food at the moment

But you know that you need to eat because of the baby and to give it nutrition and what it needs

So, yesterday

You you were like

Barbecuing stuff. I didn't want to have anything, but I know

I don't usually have meat because

well, we've been eating meat a lot in the last

three weeks

But I just don't feel like having anything, but I was like I have to, I have to have some substantial

That's probably... that's the main it's the weirdest thing with Kel having to force her to eat food

usually you're pretty good with food and you're pretty like

Yeah

Apart from that, you just, you know, I keep thinking

Buying things like I go out and not see the baby stuff and I want to buy

It's just you get used to, I'm getting used to

Understanding, I guess. Yeah have a baby that's gonna be born in like seven months.

Has it hit you yet?

Do you think? I mean you keep asking me

Like, do you feel like a dad yet? Or like it's gonna happen is it has it hit you Pete and to be honest it

Hasn't because obviously

The only, the only thing that I noticed is that you're feeling a bit sick, right? That's the only change for me my emotional

Yeah, and it's an external thing for me

I don't have this internal change in hormones and feelings and

emotion and everything like that that you're going through, but has it properly hit you yet that you will have

This parasite, baby

Crying and keeping you awake and you know eventually leading leading you to be an amazing parent in

seven months from now

Not really

Maybe I'm just not

Conscious about it. Like if I wasn't pregnant I would be like

let's travel, let's do, you know, other things but it's really

Fine for me to be like I can't do that

I can't just you know decide I can't just go away and do other things because very soon

I'll be I'll have a baby and I have to take care of him or her

But I think it's a very subtle change

You'll get used to it and I'm sure

when I have a big belly and the baby's moving I'll feel more like a parent, but now...

At the same time, I'm reading a lot of a

lot of things about parenting so I'm trying to get

You know

Up your skills

Yeah, because that scares me

more than the pregnancy I think being a parent and

Educating someone kinda of scares me

We are almost here I just have to do a U-ey and park behind this car

How's it going? Can I grab a large cappuccino?

takeaway and what about you, Kel?

a small hot chocolate

And I might grab

What do you reckon? One of these muffins, Kel?

I might grab the dark choc berry one for me, please man

So good

Is it good?

These muffins rule

Look at that chocolate!

Tasty? And the cappuccino looking forward to this

All right now we're off to the beach we'll see if we can find somewhere nice to sit down and continue this chat

Yeah, I'm all coffeed out. Oh too much coffee today, I think

How many?

Oh like ten

I'm probably... I had to have one decaf as well

So, there you go, three or two and a half, two and a half

Anyway, we're in Bowen heads and we're gonna head down to this...There's a little pier. Hopefully, there's no one on it. Guess we'll see

So, how's it been? What did you expect before getting pregnant, Kel? What were the expectations before you got done?

Before you got up the duff?

I don't know, I didn't really have any sort of expectations

I thought I really thought the whole thing about I'm so sick

I was in an overreaction

A little bit, but

I can see it's not

There are things that

not many people talk about like

Because they embarrassing and you you know, you know just feel like

Is it actually happening? Like I feel bloated all the time

sometimes like today I woke up was like

Am I showing I have such a big bump!

Am I showing or am I bloated?

It wasn't a baby, it was something else.

You go to the toilet and then you get up and you're like damn it!

You burp a lot, like I'm always...

and she never burps, I burp all the time I must be incredibly pregnant

It I hate it. It's just horrible

you don't like burping or you don't like being pregnant?

You're a bit gassy

Me?

No, me.

I am, anyway. You are, anyway, but I'm not used to it.

And you have to pee every like 30 minutes to an hour, that's what

more like anxious

Out of everything.

You have to always think where's the toilet? Where's the toilet?

I wake up

Four, like three or four times at night

and

It's quite cold here so wake up, it's cold.

It's not really cold. It's just she thinks it's cold

It is cold And you have to go to the bathroom and you know that the time I go back to bed

I'm already like I need to pee again

So I thought about getting, don't know what you call it in English, Brazilians will know penico

Just leave the penico

Some kind of small

Bucket or receptacle or something that you can pee in and that's near your bed that they would have used before toilets

People use pans. I think you would call it. They use them in the hospital.

Wee can get one of those for you if you want, you got your bucket

No the bucket is for vomit

We need to get a mattress that we can put a hole in and then just hold it over the toilet and you can just

Sleep on the mattress right there, right and the toilets right underneath you

Like I had to get new bras because

The ones I had were quite uncomfortable

That shocked me how quickly your breasts got bigger

Straight after getting pregnant I thought oh, yeah,

It was like, we found out one day the next day. I was like, boom!

I always thought that it was like, you know towards the end that the the breasts get bigger

They get filled with milk or whatever that the baby needs and that happens later on in pregnancy

But obviously the hormones kick in and there's some sort of you know changes occurring in your breasts

But I was just like yeah, I didn't expect that

But I like it

I like it, to be honest, that's a good part of pregnancy

Forgive me, forgive me

He was like, can you just press pause?

But I'm only eight weeks so I don't know how big

There's no upper limit

I think those are the most, you know, annoying things mmm, it's really it's really nice

I don't know if you think about it and you imagine you have to educate this person and try your best and

Love and I was really scared of not being able to love. Yeah, what were you nervous about?

What were you scared about it? Cause you had quite a lot of preconceptions before getting pregnant that you were sort of like

Am I gonna be a good mom? Yeah. Well the good mum thing. It's always in my mind

Like am.. I am I able to do a good job? and there's no recipe, right?

You just, you try your best

you have to wing it

Yeah suck it and see

yeah

But what I am doing is I'm reading as much as I can about parenting and trying to get

Trying to understand what's the best for with regards to education and stuff but with the love issue

Because you're single and that's the amount of love I'm capable of giving

I get the limit at the moment

I get everything

you get everything and it's an easy because

everyone's like your baby's born and you

There's no way you can love someone more than you love your baby and that scares me because

How vulnerable is that? Like this little person can literally destroy my life if something happens

I'll be like that's my whole heart going away with this little kid

but at the same time it's amazing to think that

You are able to love someone like that and you can do anything

Well, that's what I kept saying to you the whole time

You kept saying how am I ever gonna love someone as much as I see everyone loving their children?

And I said, I think it's one It's naturally gonna occur and two

I think it's the kind of thing that's gonna develop as you get through your pregnancy

You have this thing inside you that you're developing a bond with and then when it's born it's just gonna...

With your niece, for example

Yeah, I really love her. Like I spent time with her. She's the cutest baby ever and I feel connected and I'm like

How can I think I will not love my baby.

That's what I said

I'm like you already like my niece so much to imagine what you're gonna feel for your own child

So, that was a big thing that you were worried about to begin with I think

But yeah, it's much better now, but it was before getting pregnant

I was like scared of you know

you know not being able to care and to love but you know nature, nature works fine, and you just do it.

Exactly and so what about parenting you've been learning a lot about that recently

What are the do's and don'ts that you think you sort of come across?

That's hard because there's no, as I said, there's no recipe, right? There's no right answer. Yes

You don't you shouldn't expect - oh, I will apply those rules and tips and my baby will be the best

Child, you know on earth

Every child is different. Yes

it's a difficult thing though because there are definitely answers that are better than other answers, right? and options that are

better than other options, but there's no definitive guide to

Do this four times a day

You know and you'll have a good kid

No

And that's the difficult part for me - I want to do the best I can but I know my own limitations

And I also know that you can only control so much when you have the child. They they're gonna have their own personality

that's sort of

Irrespective of what you set up or do before that? Yeah, and I'm really into the whole like peaceful parenting stuff

Because that's a very different way like fro my experience. I wasn't raised with

Peacefully

And I really think it works. Like I really think that's

That's the, you know, the best advice you can get

Do you want to talk about what is peaceful parenting exactly?

So, peaceful parents is all about not...

Understanding first of all understanding your child and respecting their

Personality, like

You wouldn't force your friend or your partner to do something they don't want to do because it hurts and it feels horrible

so the whole respect towards children, that's what I like and

It's all about avoiding punishment

It's not that you're not gonna

Teach them

you know boundaries limit and exactly but you do it in a different way because every time they misbehave

It's a chance for you to teach them something as opposed to it's a chance for you to punish them

I think it's a lot more based around conversations and discussions why they can't have something why they can't do something

Why something they did was wrong as opposed to

Go to your room because I said so or you can't do this because I don't want you to I think

From my point of view that wouldn't work on me now

So why would it work on a kid, right?

like if someone tells you you can't have this and you'd be like well

I feel like I can so why can't I and the person just says because I said so you'd be like well

That doesn't really you know sit well with me you need to tell me more so I think you need to sort of

Treat kids like that as well. Like they're more like adults

Explain to them why you're deciding certain things.

You also need to understand the

The

Child's brain is not developed. Yeah, so you can't expect them to be mature and you know,

Responsive when you know, you lose your temper sometimes and you know, it's hard I struggle with

You know understanding my emotions sometimes and I get quite overwhelmed from you know

Every now and then but imagine a child. It's just really hard for them to understand what's happening

Like they don't, they don't know any better. They're just children.

Yeah, and but I think that's the important part.

They are not gonna learn without you

And you need to accept that you can't expect more

When even though you want your child to be the most well behaved child in the room

You can't expect them to be more mature then that they actually are for their age, you know?

And I really like that because I see, I mean, not being judgemental here

But I see a lot of people and I used to do the same with my sister or my you know

The kids I was working with

In Townsville, you can't you get so frustrated. Sometimes you want them to do something and you forget like

If they are misbehaving it's probably because they are they are after something else

Is it attention? Are they hungry? like there's always something and with the documentaries

we've been watching quite often the kids that misbehave the most so the ones who don't have a connection with their parents and

they're just looking for some kind of you know, I

Guess response or some kind of attention from their parents and that's why they act out or they act up and something that I

it really resonates with me is

At least in Brazil, I think and again I'm speaking from my own experience

The whole thing with my family was like, oh don't do that the child will be spoiled

You're hugging too much, you're doing too much attention

It's just for me that doesn't make any sense because I can't imagine how scary the world is

We you're like a little child the only thing you know, they're safe

It's your, it's your mom and your dad and you don't give them attention

You let them cry for hours without going there

There's limits right? You have to be not overbearing

You can't do overbearing mother that protects them from everything

You have to... you have to let them expose themselves to the world and risk being hurt or in danger

But at the same time be there for them

You need to be there all the time and you need to be as

You know

Affectionate and caring and there's no limit for that. That's one thing that if you get if you want to get something from

like peaceful parenting and stuff just

Be there and give as much love as you can like, there's no limit

you're feel free to give as much love as you can because that's that's what makes them safe and

They connect with you and they trust you and that's their world like that

you are the only thing they have when they're little at least

It's been good to learn about it

That's where we're at currently

So, who knows if that's what it'll actually be like later on during the pregnancy or when the baby is actually born

but

The sun's getting in my eyes. Maybe we should, we should finish up there guys. Hope you enjoyed it

But yeah Kel thought this would be a fun idea to sort of

sit down and do a pregnancy diary kind of thing where we can chat about what's happening with Kel and what we're planning and and

Things were learning and stuff just to talk about different things in English. So

Hopefully you enjoy it

All the things in the next video some things yeah, let's do it. Anyway. Thanks for joining us, guys! Chat soon