Practice English Speaking&Listening with: I Went To Work Wearing Only Body Paint

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- Alright guys, what's up?

How's it goin'? Hey, what's up?

Hello, hello, alright anyway, let's get on with the video.

I really wanna get more Instagram followers

so why don't you guys follow me?

That's the whole video.

It's just a little vlog of me asking you guys to follow me.

No, for real, I really wanna get more Instagram followers.

Right now I have about 8,000 on my Instagram page

Which may seem like a lot

but compared to other social media people who have

millions and millions and millions and millions and millions

of followers, it really isn't that much.

So I've been doing some research

and it seems like what's really popular

on Instagram right now is body painting.

Which is basically just female models

getting painted in clothes and it looks like they're dressed

but they're actually naked.

So all I have to do is get one

of these accounts to use me as their model.

I spent the next few hours trying to contact

every single body painting Instagram page I could find.

Guys, Jen the Body Painter,

who get millions and millions of views

on each one of her posts just agreed to use me as her model.

I am super excited to do this.

I hope I get a bunch of followers out of this.

Let's go.

Hey, how's it goin'?

- Good, good, good.

Is there anything I can do to prepare for this?

- Wax the whole body?

Do it for the Instagram followers.

So I'm heading downtown to get a sugar wax.

Sugaring's supposed to hurt a lot less than regular waxing.

It's just lemon, water,

and what the (bleep) was the last ingredient?

- Oh sugar, there we go.

(laughing)

So it's not hot, you're not gonna get burnt,

and they pull in the direction that your hair grows.

I don't know why I'm doing this.

I got to the salon and I was really nervous.

So was the lady.

I had a lot of chest hair and I asked her

if maybe I could have a local anesthetic or something.

She gave me some baby powder.

(groaning)

Oh, man.

(heavy metal music)

(screaming)

Hurt so bad I ended up passing out.

When I woke up and looked down I realized

I have a 13-year-old Bar Mitzvah bod.

I took my hairless bod to go buy some very little underwear

because I can't be naked in the shoot.

I met Jen the Body Painter and her whole family

but before we started shooting,

I wanted to learn a little bit about how they got into this.

It stemmed from like using bodies to advertise things?

- Pretty much 'cause when I got painted

as a cheetah I got so much attention.

- Is it very different than regular painting?

- Oh yeah because the person moves.

So with like a canvas, you just can just sit there for hours

and play your music whatever, feel really relaxed.

- So how long does it take usually?

- Captain America was seven to eight hours.

For you, right now what we're getting ready to do

it's gonna take us two and a half hours.

- So you guys are like a family who just...

- Does really weird things together.

So I would literally come home from school

and as soon as I'd walk in the door,

like our kitchen is in sight,

so I would see like topless girls just walking around.

- My mom never painted naked models in my house.

It was just like my dad walking around naked.

Anyway, time for me to get naked.

It was awkward because I realized I'm at work.

- What the (bleep) is happening right now?

(laughing)

We then had to take a bunch of pictures for the thumbnail.

Being an instagrammer isn't easy.

Then they gave me so pre-painted shorts,

so they didn't have to paint my, you know.

Looked at their phone to find pictures of clothes

and started painting.

(electronic music)

She also had to paint inside my belly button.

That was a big no-no.

(electronic music)

Time for the big reveal.

Oh dude! Holy (bleep)!

Wow!

Oh my god.

Yo, it looks so good!

Wow!

If anybody watches Friends, when Bruce Willis talks

to himself and he's like "Who's a sex machine?"

I'm a sex machine right now.

I said that and nobody laughed so it made me uncomfortable.

(laughing)

This painting is insane.

You did that on me while I was like talking and laughing?

- [Jen] Yeah.

- How's my butt look?

- [Jen] Great. - [Second artist] Amazing

- [Jen] Never looked better.

- It's time to go out,

see if people notice, see what people think.

BuzzFeed, get ready for Naked Eric.

(acapella singing)

At first people didn't even notice.

And when they did, they didn't know what it was.

- Are those leggings? - [Eric] Yeah!

- Are they even pants or are they just leggings?

- That feels like your skin.

Is it your skin?

- [Eric] It's my skin.

- Wait. What the (bleep)?

- Oh wait. Oh my god it's paint.

(laughing)

- This is...

(laughing)

- I'm naked.

(laughs)

- It looked like a real shirt.

I'm like that is a small, tiny shirt.

Oh my god.

(laughs)

- Are you a little cold?

It's a bit nipplely in here.

- You're wearing underwear because...

- No, no, no.

My penis is taped to my leg.

(laughing)

No, no, no, I'm kidding.

It's not, I'm wearing underwear.

- Oh thank god, thank god.

- How would it be taped?

To what?

- It's also blizzarding outside

so maybe not the wisest choice today but...

- Not at all, I have to go outside

- I cannot stop staring at your penis.

I am so sorry Eric, I just can't do it.

- Look at my eyes, that's who I am.

- Now you know how I feel all the time.

- So this was super fun.

Most people had no idea.

It took a lot of people a long time to realize

I was painted and once they realized, they were

so impressed with the paint job.

So I think that's the coolest thing about this video

was like how good these guys are at what they do.

Body painting truly is an art form, it's really impressive.

Now I'm gonna head home, figure out how to wash this off.

Getting home sucked because there was a blizzard outside

and well, paint doesn't really keep you warm.

(heavy metal music)

My nipples are so hard right now.

Showering was fun though, I looked like a human bath bomb.

It looked pretty cool.

I've been in the shower for 45 minutes,

and it's still not coming off.

And my whole shower is bleached black.

So I just finished editing, it's been a week.

And here's the update: Jen the body painter has posted

my post, she tagged me in it.

It currently has over 500,000 views.

And my Instagram page

(drum roll)

I only got 100 followers.

I waxed my whole body for 100 followers.

I've been itchy all week for 100 followers.

Everyone just cared about the body painters,

and not about me.

I'm not giving up, though.

I'm gonna keep making these videos

till I get a million followers.

(soft jazz music)

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