- I ain't got none of my lights with me,
so there's mad shadows on my face. Oh gee!
(neighing, hooves clopping, and chiming sounds)
What up, everyone! It's your girl, Superwoman,
and it's story time with Lilly!
Today, I decided to do something a little different.
Instead of doing a Q&A or drawing my life,
I thought I would tell you my childhood stories
through acting them out.
I am an actor.
Now, these are real stories, so sit back,
relax, and enjoy getting to know
the hot mess that is Lilly Singh.
Lilly song.
I was born on September 26th, 1988 in Scarborough, Ontario,
which means what up, Canada!
(slurping sounds)
To start off, as a kid, I was super stubborn.
Which makes a lot of sense, because as an adult
I'm also very stubborn.
Just kidding!
I'm not stubborn, I swear.
I'm not stubborn, and nothing you say can change my mind,
so shut up. Shut up!
No, but for real. I was a handful,
and my parents will even not be hesitant for a minute
to tell everyone what a annoying brat I was.
I remember one time, I got in trouble for this one thing,
but to be honest, it wasn't even my fault.
(ball thudding on wall)
- [Lilly As Her Mother] Oi! Stop throwing the ball!
You're going to break something.
- Oh my god. No I'm not, mom!
Trust me, I'm really good at this.
- [Lilly As Her Mother] Lilly, I said stop.
- Mom! I said I know what I'm doing. Trust me!
(ball thuds and clock crashes)
(table shatters)
(screams) I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
- But I vividly remember this day
because that was the day I learned how to run.
That's right. I was Usain Bolt before
Usain Bolt was Usain Bolt.
I was throwing this ball, and I hit this damn clock
which, by the way, was like a circle with spikes around it.
Child safety, okay.
What the eff was this, Game of thrones?
Why the hell was that clock in my house?
And this goddamn hoe clock fell
through a glass table and broke,
and I remember just running.
Running down the hall, out my front door,
into the street. I was just like,
yo, I am safer in oncoming traffic
than I am with my mom right now.
You see, because back in those days, kids,
things like "child services"
and "parenting techniques" didn't really exist, okay?
Like today, you get in trouble like
you might get your phone taken away. Maybe.
Back in the day, you got your limb taken away.
Just kidding! I'm not, I'm kidding.
That's, that... (laughs nervously)
What? Do you hear that?
Do you hear that? It's all the kids with
immigrant parents that are just like "preach!"
Here's the thing though, right?
Not only was I stubborn when it came to
my parents telling me to do
and not do certain things,
but I also always had a point to prove.
This one time, I was mad at my parents,
and I decided as a goddamn 10-year-old
that I no longer needed them.
So this is what I did.
- I'm gonna run away! And live in the washroom!
I'm in the washroom! And I'm living here.
- [Lilly As Her Mother] Okay.
- I swear, I'm so mad in here right now!
- [Lilly As Her Mother] Have fun.
- Yo, young hoe Lilly,
who do you think is gonna be negatively impacted
by you living in the washroom? You're so dumb!
This is why you should've watched less Power Rangers
and read more books, ya moron!
Now aside from being a stubborn brat,
I was also very passionate about things as a kid.
'Cause I wouldn't just like things, no,
I'd become obsessed with things.
And one of those things was Bollywood.
(Bollywood music plays on TV)
Once I fell in love with Bollywood,
it's not like I just watched Bollywood.
No, don't be ridiculous.
I was Bollywood. I was a Bollywood actress.
I'd dance like them, I'd talk like them, I'd sing like them.
Obviously, I was up in my bedroom
performing bomb effin' concerts like them.
(Bollywood music)
("Dharma Mix" by Udit Narayan)
Real life picture of me as a kid with Madhuri Dixit,
who was my favorite Bollywood actress growing up.
Thank you, universe, for validating my obsession.
Now, another one of my obsessions
should come as no surprise to you.
And that was WWF, which is now known as WWE.
What up, my OGs.
Back in the day, Monday Night Raw
used to play at nine p.m. on Mondays,
but here's the thing.
Every once in a while, they would cancel it
for curling. I know what you're thinking.
"What the eff is curling?"
Curling is this damn sport where they throw this
boulder thing on the ice, and they take this
giant toothbrush and they (imitated curling sound).
It's ultra Canadian.
(slurping sounds)
And when that would happen, they would cancel wrestling,
but they would air it at two a.m.
So what did I do?
I set my VCR. Kids, VCR is like iCloud, but with a cassette.
And I would record it overnight
and then wake up at six a.m. to watch it before school.
And that, my friends, is how this tomboy
got all the boys to come to her desk
to know what's happening.
I was like a dealer, a negotiator.
Like yo, you wanna know what happened?
Last night's fight, yeah?
Bring me your best Sailor Moon cards.
Right here. Let's make a deal.
Specifically, I was obsessed with The Rock.
Is this, I feel like this might be
the first time you're hearing this,
but I really, I was a fan.
A very large fan of The Rock.
And it might have showed, like, a little.
- Hi, what's your name?
- Hey, my name is Lilly. What's your name?
- Jessica.
- It doesn't matter what your name is!
(Jessica cries)
- Picture me posing with a cardboard cutter of The Rock
while I was obsessed as a kid.
And boom! Real life picture of me with The Rock.
Thank you, Jeebus.
Strangely enough, I wasn't just obsessed with The Rock,
but I was also obsessed with collecting rocks
and making little stories out of them.
- What do we have here?
Oh! There's diamonds in this rock.
But don't tell anybody, or they'll try to steal it from us.
(sinister laughter)
- Growing up, I had the hairiest arms ever.
And I know off me saying that,
you have a visual in your mind
of what you think it was like.
I need you to multiply that by four.
It's four times worse than whatever you're envisioning.
No exaggeration.
It wasn't even hair. I basically had feathers.
I basically had wings.
Like, I don't understand how during gym class,
when I did jumping jacks, I didn't just take flight.
I swear. You think Red Bull gives you wings?
Nah. Okay, Being a brown girl gives you wings.
And for a long time growing up,
I was super embarrassed of my hairy arms.
So I would always cover them.
- Aren't you hot in that sweater?
- No.
- Now, eventually I stopped giving an eff,
because also eventually my mom let me wax my arms.
That's how I made Manjeet's wig.
At a really young age, I developed a fear of
spiders and clowns.
And that is because my cousins forced me to watch
the movie "It."
("It" plays on TV)
- I'm not even scared.
(ominous music)
- You know what's stronger than fear?
Your stupid effin' pride! I was like seven years old
fronting like "no, I'm not scared."
Shut the eff up! You were scared, Lilly,
of the goddamn witch in Snow White.
The Disney witch! Who you playin'?
And now this year, they're remaking "It"
to eff up even more kids.
And I am here for it, to be honest.
Also, wait, you know what?
This video's pretty long.
To be continued! (makes explosion noise)
No, but for real. Wait for part two.
It's gonna be my very next upload.
Learn more about me and my childhood.
I promise there's twists and turns and stuff.
I tell you about my tail that I have.
There's, I don't know, Is this how you do clickbait?
Is this? Teach me how to clickbait!
♫ Won't you teach me how to clickbait?
♫ Won't you teach me how to clickbait?
Go to the end card!
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Make sure you subscribe because I make new videos
every Monday and Thursday.
One love, Superwoman,
that is a wrap, and zoop!
