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Practice English Speaking&Listening with: STOP SEARCHING FOR THIS! - Dan and Phil Play: HIGHER OR LOWER

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P: Hello, DanAndPhilGAMES limbo sticks!

D: Um? P: Yeah, cause they can be high or low.

D: Great! And welcome to DanAndPhilGAMES, where today we're playing the Higher Lower game!

P: I mean, there's only so many games you can make out of Google search results

D: But, well (P: And we're doing another one!) we are still do-

D: Welcome to the Google channel where two youtubers are shilling hard for the big G

P: Do you know what? I really like these videos because it gives us a chance to talk about humanity

D: I kind of hate - we've been over this, (P: And play a little game) and we keep doing these Google search result games.

D: And I hate them (P: But you love them) because they're making me aware of who I'm sharing the internet with and people keep coming up with more.

P: You're sharing the internet with him. *laughs*

D: I like to think that's what all of our subscribers are like. Smoking, drink, like, 'let's do this, Dan and Phil'.

P: That's not good on your crotch though having your laptop there with no pants.

D: It'll murder all your sperm. (P: It will.)

D: The infertile generation of laptop users. (P: Right.)

P: What we're gonna do, is - this is a cumulative game. So it's game over if you get something wrong.

P: So if we get to ten, we're working together,

P: We'll be able to open this box of Haribo, which I've been secretly keeping.

D: And wh- what will you do otherwise?

P: It'll just go back in the cupboard for the next video.

D: And I'm sure you won't open it cause you have great self control. (P: *mmm*)

D: Oh my god, okay so,

D: This is the first- P: First one D: How does this game work, Phil?

P: So...this is the search results of people. Five hundred and fifty thousand people have searched for Wayne Rooney,

P: have more or less people search for women's rights?

D: Jesus Christ.

D: Is this really how we're starting? P: I like to think that women's rights is a popular topic

D: A lot of people like to keep up with sports on a monthly basis

P: Yeah, that's the thing. D: I really, really don't want it to be Wayne Rooney

P: I wanna win the Haribo, and I think it's gonna be Wayne Rooney.

D: I would- but I- you know, the young people,

D: We care about the social justice P: We do care about it

D: We want to like in an equal society P: But I think more of the average internet citizen is like 'Wayne Rooney'

D: Really?! P: Yeah.

D: So you think that it has... P: Lower- uh, higher...no, women's rights has lower.

P: Yeah, see? D: Oooh

D: Pick up, guys. Tumblr, you need to start competing with football.

P: Women's rights, or granola? D: Oh shit

D: Why is women's rights the one that we- P: Because then it- it continues

D: Well, you know, women, do they care more about rights or breakfast? P: I think I've searched for granola

P: At least eight times? This month. D: I've personally searched for...

D: Delicious cereal more than intersectional feminism, and I'm gonna admit that

P: I've been trying to try out some yoghurt/granola-

D: I thought you were gonna be like 'I've been trying out some...' Both: Women's rights

P: No, I've been trying out some yo- yoghurt/granola combos?

P: So I was googling that, so I think that is mainly my search results, and i think it's gonna be higher

D: So you think granola (P: Yep) has higher searches than women's rights P: Yep

P: Oof!

P: Most of those are me

D: OH, great! Another easy to choose- (P: What's with all these issues?)

D: Jesus Christ, game

(P: I thought this is gonna be light-hearted.) D: This, this, okay, women's right,

(P: or homelessness-) D: Or homeless I mean this- Jesus Chri- P: This is making me sad. D: I think,

P: I feel like more people are searching for granola D: I just think, I think more people

P: I feel like I think more people are searching for granola D: I just think- I think more people

and looking for information on the breakfast they eat-

are looking for information on the breakfast they eat P: homelessness is a very specific word for a big topic

P: Homelessness is a very specific word for a big topic as well.

D: Home-less-ness versus granola. Yes, what a good way to justify our societies (P: lower-) priorities (P: lower)

D: Homelessness has lower searches than granola.

D: Homelessness has lower searches than granola

P: Oh not bad, not quite-

D: clearly... I'm just going to not talk

P: I don't know who- D: Who the hell is Kyle Field, (P: I- but- you know-) another sports person.

P: -he's obviously some American footballer-

P: He's obviously some American football (D: A sport guy) P: and they're like, *American accent* "I need to collect the Kyle Field sticker."

(D: *american accent* A Sport Guy-) P: -and they're like, *American accent* 'I need to acquire the Kyle Field sticker.'

D: Higher.

D: higher

P: No! I was gonna say lower!

P: You should have consulted me!

P: Look, that's the cat. *hits Dan* This is you. (Dan laughs)

P: Obviously

D: Why would it be obvious? P: Because who- I don't know who that was!

D: Why would it be obvious? P: Because who- I didn't know who that was!

D: But he's a spo- like Wayne Rooney.

D: But it's a sport- like Wayne Rooney P: But he's like a big thing D: But he might be big in America

P: But he's like a big thing.

D: But he might be big in America, the shit do we know about football.

P: Well I know who Michael Phelps is.

D: Cause he's- (P: Oh wait he's a swimmer isn't he *giggles* ) -a sexy swim guy

P: Right. D: Fucking hell.

D: Okay, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers versus Immigration

P: See, you've searched that a lot cause you get blocked from America by TSA.

P: So *laughs* maybe they were your search results. (Dan sighs)

P: I think this is a high number so I think immigration is lower.

P: I think this is a high number so I think immigration is lower.

D: But a lot of people want to move to different countries. P: Higher? Lower, lower!

*clicks*

P: Geese! Both: OH!! D: Boom!

P: No!

D: Fail okay, umm..

P: Is this the last one? D: Well, that was a great round. Okay,

P: Right, 'Ghost in the shell'- D: This is gonna be the shortest video ever.

P: -Versus 'sand kiting'

D: Well who the fuck is googling sand kiting P: I'd googled sand kiting they're having an amazing time

P: I'd google sand kiting, they're having an amazing time.

D: Ghost in The Shell, five hun- we've established now, 550 [thousand] is a big number (P: that's a lot-)

P: That's a lot, that's a lot of people

D: So I think that sand kiting has lower searching.

P: Right. Sand kiting is lower, but I'd like to try it.

D: You don't need to justi- 210-. P: Ohh! that is-

D: -get fucked sand kiting P: Vaseline. D: Versus Vaseline!

P: Vaseline. D: Versus Vaseline!

P: Vaseline has a lot of uses

P: Vaseline has a lot of uses

D: *suggestive eye roll* P: Uhhh

P: So I'm gonna say higher because more people want to buy it

P: So I'm gonna say higher because more people want to buy it.

D: Boom. P: Ohhf, that's big. D: Wow.

D: Was that competing with women's rights?

D: Was that competing with Woman's Rights

P: Vaseline or coincidence?

D: Co- the- the concept of coincidence, (P: Oh my gosh) that's what we google when we argue about-

D: The concept of coincidence P: oh my gosh

P: Dan is SO annoying with coincidences

P: Dan is so annoying with coincidences

P: I'm like 'it's a message from the universe' and Dan's like-

'No it's just a thing that's happened and if it wasn't a coincidence (D: But Phil's like-) you wouldn't have noticed.'

P: "and if it wasn't a coincidence, you wouldn't notice!"

D: 'This is such an amazing coincidence (P: It is!) therefore it must be something special.' (P: right-)

P: It is! D: Therefore it must be something special.

D: -and I'm like 'no the universe is very big and random (P: There's a-) anything can happen. (P: -a guy-) If something happens then it's just a coincidence, and that's interesting.

D: And if something interesting happens (P: Yeah-) then it's just an coincidence and that's interesting

P: There's a guy I know called Sam, (D: *eyeroll*) I don't know him that well. He's a surfer.

P: I have met him three times at three different airports

P: I have met him three times at three different airports

P: Like just randomly. One in Orlando, one in London and one somewhere like Spain

P: Like just randomly. One in Orlando, one in London and one somewhere like Spain.

D: And I say that that is just very random (P: but-) and it's just funny (P: i think-) and cool that something so random happens.

D: And I say that that is just very random and it's just funny and cool that something so random happens.

P: I think that's destiny that me and Sam need to team up and save the universe

P: I think it's destiny me and Sam (D:No- )need to team up and save the universe!

D: -see, see you don't need bullshit to get you excited about the universe. P: right.

D: Can you, can you not just be thrilled by statistical improbabilities?

P: No it's insane though D: The idea that you and this guy would both end up at an airport-

P: Yeah. D: -Several times over several years. P: It's just insane.

D: Is a- a- a very small number and that's what's thrilling about-

P: Is just insane D: Is a very small number and that's what's thrilling

P: If I see him one more time (D: -physics.) in an airport, I'm gonna go on some kind of mission

P: If I see him one more time in an airport, I'm gonna go on some kind of mission

D: Well, higher or lower? P: I think, Both: Lower.

P: No, oh, ahh! Lower, lower!

D: Who the frick is googling for coincidence?

Dan: Who the frick is googling for coincidence P: M-Me

P: ME! *dan clicks* GEESE!

P: OH!!!!

P: OH!!!!

P: That was so close! That was like...that hurt me slightly.

D: I want the fricking Haribo.

D: Adam Curtis is a film maker (P: yeah) who made a great political documentary called "HyperNormalisation"

D: Made a great political documentary called Hyper Normalisation.

D: It's on iPlayer, it's about three hours long, and it'll make you really depressed.

P: I don't wanna watch that. I think D: Erm

D: That was quite a trendy-

D: That was quite a trendy- he's done a lot of things and politics is quite hot right now.

D: He's done a lot of things and politics is quite hot right now.

P: But I think more people are searching coincidences because they've seen other people in airports.

P: But I think more people are searching because they've seen other people in airports

P: Lower. I'm gonna click it, I've taken control of the mouse.

P: Lower, I'm gonna click it I've taken control of the mouse

*Phil yelps*

D: I think it's higher

P: HAHAHA D: Ohh, nice! P: Have faith in me.

D: Versus Wikileaks. P: Wikileaks? Wikileaks is higher.

D: Versus Wikileaks. P: Wikileaks? Wikileaks is higher.

P: A lot of people are searching for Wikileaks D: in the basement of the NSA

P: A lot of people are searching for wikileaks D: in the basement of the NSA

P: They're leaking things

P: They're leaking things

D: Where are ya bitch P: *laughs*

P: So I think that's higher than Adam Curtis.

P: So I think that's higher than Adam Curtis.

D: Do we go outside less than Julian Assange (P: I don't know?) is the question

D: Do we go outside less than Julian Assange that is the question P: That is a good question

P: That is a good question. D: Ummm..

P: Go higher D: Yeah, must be higher

P: Whoa D: Fuckin' hell Wikileaks, way to shit all over women's rights, P: Oh my gosh.

D: homelessness, and sport all together. P: Yeah.

P: Beyonce is obviously the highest of all. C'mon everyone searches bey-

P: Beyonce is obviously the highest of all. C'mon everyone-

D: Two Point Two Four Million.

D: Point

P: Picture this. Average Joe, watching this video, pours their granola,

P: Picture this. Average Joe, watching this video, pause their granola

P: Searches for Beyonce on Google.

P: It's just a thing that happens.

D: Closes the tab on feminism.

D: Opens a new tab. P: On Beyonce.

P: Beyonce!

P: Beyonce!

P: Beyonce is the queen, she gets the most.

P: Beyonce is the queen she gets the most.

D: I will delete Lemonade of my phone- (P: Come on, come on, come on.) -if this robs me of this haribo

*Both gasp in shock*

P: She is the apex predator!

#1 Beyonce Fan: She is the apex predator D: Did you just quote P: I just- D: What's that chronicle Scientist Phil: It's a scientific fact if someones at the top of the food chain

*Both laugh*

D: Did you just quote- P: I just said that -

D: Was that Chronicle? P: That's-no, it's a scientific fact

P: If someone's at the top of the foodchain.

D: You, you, you you quoted my fucking dad- P: I was being Dane DeHaan. D: Dane DeHaan, okay.

D: Dane DeHaan, okay.

D: Less than Beyonce, Beyonce has to beat everyone.

D: Less than Beyonce. Beyonce has to beat everybody.

P: I don't think you're ready for this Big Mac, I don't think you're ready for this- lower

D: Way to just remind us of the shame of Kelly and Michelle

P: Lower

D: Okay, Mcdon-

Both: *Absolutely shook* NOOO!!

*Nooooooooooo*

P: That doesn't make sense, Beyonce is the one- who's searching for McDonalds??

D: Who- like, like (P: You can't even get Mcdonalds delivery)

D: Beyonce, you know- she's releasing music, she's putting pregnancy photos on Instagram, you're gonna google that (P: *groans*)

D: You're not gonna like google what the monthly special at your local McDonalds is. P: No!

D: More than the average person might be interested in what Beyonce is doing with the- (P: you can't-)

D: WELL, there we go. I think what we've learned from this video- P: We need to- we need more.

P: We need more, I'm not satisfied. I want get like, closer to ten.

P: How about if we do it one more time, we're allowed to open the box and have one, then close the box again

D: Fine, okay. (P: Last one) MasterCard or Disneyland

D: I think- Both: Disneyland D: Is higher than master card

P: Yes, Mickey

P: I thought that'd be more though. I thought more people would search for that

D: Disneyland or an incredible bipartisan charity that saves people in countries

P: I think more people are searching Disneyland D: I think more people are searching Disneyland, Jesus P: Let's be honest

P: That's still quite high though, it's better than...some things

P: World War Two D: Ah, Hitler

D: Yes, I wondered when this would happen

P: A lot of people have, like, history projects and stuff though so, it's going to be World War 2 for sure

D: It's just so inevitable that Hitler would be one of the things P: I know, I know

D: Okay yup that's good- (P: that's a lot) less than Beyonce, official.

P: Microwave meals or World War Two

D: C'mon, yeah, alright

P: That was- you need to consult (D: who the heck-) me on this

D: Microwave meals or- Both: Democracy

D: Well, I mean (P: Right-) the faith in humankind-

D: like with all other Google themed videos has been an all time low here P: Yes

D: But one would really frickin hope that people care more about democracy than Tesco chicken tikka masala (P: i think-)

D: despite that being basically what I was raised on for the whole of the 90's.

P: I think more people are searching for Democracy.

D: Democracy. P: Yesss.

D: Right. P: We're doing well, we're doing well, we're doing well, we got five.

D: Democracy or Brazil

P: Brazil for sure D: Come to Brazil!

P: I think Brazil has more searches. Because people might wanna visit, they might just wanna know about it

D: Our high score is six, this is it. P: Come on, come on.

D: There was the uh... apoca-lympics

P: Brazil! D: Oooh!

P: That was close, that was closer than I'd like.

D: The Flint- Who gives a shit about the Flintstones, fuck outta here P: Yeah that's gone, that's gone

D: Right, next one

D: Ag- again. P: Hitler again D: Again, like, double Hitl-

I mean, okay you're making us question people's priorities here

P: I think- D: You're bringing up some political stuff; you're gonna hit us with the double Hitler?

P: I think more people are searching for Hitler things.

D: This is- this is Hitler's book, it's very specific P: Lower, lower than the Flintstones

P: Lower, I'd like to think it's lower D: But who cares about the Flintstones?

P: I know I had to search for that in like my history homework though. Higher?

P: That was horrifying D: This is the last time we're ever doing a google game

D: Okay, Hitler's fucking book or an island resort in Dubai P: Palm Islands, a lot of people go to holiday here

D: Yeah P: But, I think it's gonna be lower

D: Oh my god we're doing it, score nine P: Oh my gosh

P: Palm Islands, Pop-Popeye. Popeye's popular D: Believe in you

P: Ten points!

D: Shut up. Shut up. Shut. Up. Shut the front door, who- P: Who is searching for Popeye

D: 1.8 million people a month are googling Popeye,

D: and they're not googling women's rights (P: I don't know.) or even like World War Two, I mean-

P: If you're a Popeye fan, search for some feminism as well. Just equal it out a little bit, please

D: oh my god

D: Are we stopping now?

P: No! We're continuing

D: Okay well, this movie, Both: Lower

D: Popeye got some fat figures right there

P: We beat it so we can just do speed now

P: Guinness is higher D: Guinness has higher definitely

D: yeah yeah yeah, drink P: Next one

Both: Muhammed Ali, higher D: Definitely. Boom.

D: Oh my god, Beyonce levels there P: We're on a roll now

Both: Tom and Jerry, lower D: Who the hell fucking-quite a lot of people, I don't know about you P: Oh that was close

Both: New Years Eve... P: Lower

D: Ha ha! Oh my god, do we get to buy another- P: Babe Ruth, lower

P: That was close, that was close D: That was close

Both: Strip club P: Higher

P: I think people will be searching it like, 'I wanna go to a strip club'.

Lower?

D: AAARGH!

P: Dan, why'd you do that! I said the other one! D: Because, who wants strip club on their google history

P: Random people be like "I wanna go to a strip club"

P: and they'll search it like, where's the nearest one.

P: I mean they need to keep in business

D: Society is boned man that's- that's the only- I don't even want those sweets anymore.

D: I feel like humanity is- P: Look, we're in the top 10% of players

D: And I don't feel good, we got double Hitler, Phil P: We did get- D: I don't feel good about that

D: So there we go *children cheering* P: There we go. D: That was the next Google themed game.

Both: "Higher Lower"

P: I kinda liked it D: It's a frickin' fun game

D: Like all of them...I need to stop though.

P: You just need to take a step away from humanity and go back in your cave.

D: *nods*

P: You know what this means, we get to open the Haribo

*celebratory music*

D: That's a- that's an industrial tub, my friend. How many packets of Tangfastics is that *music drowns out daniel lol*

P: Now, we said we're only allowed one so which are you gonna get? Cherry, the cola bottle, crocodile

D: People are- people are gonna judge me here. The rare, purple crocodile P: Purple crocodile

P: I'm gonna go with the Cola bottle; the king of all the haribo sweets

D: What the- I've unfriended-. You just chose cola bottle out of all those options.

P: *enjoying the sweets* Hmmmmm.

P: You want us to play this again give us a thumb

D: Please, dear god, no.

P: You can subscribe by clicking our channels below

D: Please, please go search for women's rights and homelessness P: Last video is over there

D: Don't search for Mein Kampf P: No, hope you have a good life and...don't watch more Popeye

Both: Bye!!

The Description of STOP SEARCHING FOR THIS! - Dan and Phil Play: HIGHER OR LOWER