Practice English Speaking&Listening with: Lista di Nozze Web Serie - Ep 2 - Wedding Planner [Sub ENG]

- Lista di Nozze - Wedding Planner

I want every bridesmaid to wear long gloves

and ribbons on their butts.

Better still: I want each and every lady with a ribbon on their butts!

- Even my mother? - Especially your mother.

Ribbons?

- Are you sure? - Leave them be, it's not your problem...

And remember: I only want luxurious presents.

Starting with the black fridge...

And I want a black fridge at our wedding party.

A black fridge... black and bulging!

No, even better!

Bulging...

And striped!

- Striped? - Spotted!

Damn your idea of a wedding list shop!

This will kill me!

A spotted, bulging fridge!

Come on, it's a pretty original idea, no?

Pretty like the well I'm going to drown myself into

if you even think of taking a bulging, spotted fridge in here!

Is someone in?

Good morning!

- What are you looking for? - A job.

I know, everyone is looking for a job nowadays,

but I'm looking for it more than anyone!

A job pour moi!

- And you would be... - I am...

A master of ceremonies!

- Nice to meet you, I'm Vladimiro. - Leo.

- It's a pleasure. - A real pleasure!

This place needs me...

I can see it!

I'm specialized in dancing nights,

stylish weddings,

poems about baptismal fonts and funeral epitaphs!

- I'm Arnaldo. - Nice to meet you, I'm Vladimiro.

Well... this place looks more and more like the Court of Miracles!

- A horror house... - Let's see what we can do for you...

People like us should always help one another.

We have to team up!

- People like us? - Yes, you know, we...

We are... we are the same.

What do you mean?

I mean that we... we...

I think it's pretty clear, isn't it?

We are gay.

You are gay?!

- What a dreadful thing! - And what about you?

Me? How can you even think this?!

Me... gay?!

I'm Vladimiro!

Vladimiro, master of ceremonies.

Oh, Figaro! Figaro, Figaro, Fi-Ga-Ro!

The Barber of Seville!

Figaro qua!

- Figaro la'! - There's no job here for you.

If you want, you can tile the toilet!

Do you know how to tile, master?

Leo!

It's clear to me that Vladimiro

is a very elegant and cultured person.

Elegant? We're talking about a floral fag that even denies it!

- Get out of here! - I would be very helpful,

for example I could organize wedding lists!

This is a gay business!

And we don't accept any gay who's not ready to come out!

Yes! In general...

You're racist! A subversive!

- You're a standing sentinel! - How dare you?!

Ah, I want the walls to be frescoed!

And you know what else I want?

That big painting

from that famous Spanish painter, what's its name...

The one with all the messed up heads and arms...

What's its name?! Oh, yeah, the Enrica!

- You mean Guernica... - That's what I said.

I don't know if I can do it...

You're just lucky!

You need help from an expert!

Help?

Maybe we do, she can't restrain herself.

The bridesmaids will wear pink and will have long gloves and have ribbons on their butts!

And I want the bulging fridge to be exactly here!

It will be a present from Aunt Grimilde!

Weddi-what? And you say it will work?

- Absolutely... - Yes!

Oh, come on, my dear, it's free! Even if...

- He looks like a faggot. - You don't say?!

A faggot?

I've heard they have good taste...

Taste...

Is everything for me!

Come with me!

What did you do?!

I offered him as a wedding planner!

- With all the work shortage... - But you offered him for free!

It's on us, a nice gesture.

Ok, but we will have to pay him!

I really can't believe it!

That skinny pansy!

Where will we end up

if we start pretending we're not gay?

But he's not gay.

He's just... a master of ceremonies!

That's impossible! No ribbons,

no spotted fridge, and he keeps saying

that the big Spanish painting can't be taken off his wall in Madrid,

not even by paying!

I don't want him! His taste is too trashy!

And he's a faggot, that's a matter of fact.

You are absolutely right.

And he's also a faggot!

So... it was a real pleasure.

But... what will he do from now on?

He has nowhere to go...

- He'll take repair under a bridge... - Exactly.

That's the right place for a traitor.

You're a monster.

I have an idea! We can show him in the shop window!

He will surely attract customers with good taste!

- And we'll pay him, of course. - What?!

That's out of discussion!

How can you find the "right" priest for you wedding?

We've found him and he's waiting for us in the next episode:

Pope Francis!